Interlude III
“Safer on land than in the sea.”
Gem
A part of me is anxious something will go wrong. It’s an odd emotion to experience, but it’s true nonetheless. It’s expected with Rose. I just found her and I’m not about to lose her so soon, or ever. But, what gives me pause is that it’s not just the thought of losing her that’s making me anxious.
“Do you think they’ll be alright?” Cy asks, his gaze never straying from the rock they took to go into the ocean.
“You feel it too then?”
At that he turns his head so his green eyes meet mine. I can see my own worries reflected in them. “The odd feeling that I shouldn’t let them out of my sight?” He grimaces a little. “Or the anxiety that they could both disappear?”
“Both.” I give him a half-smile. “Both of those things.” I sigh. “Her I understand. She’s my family. But I can’t quite place why I feel so worried about him.”
He sighs in commiseration, feet digging into the sand as he spreads his legs out in front of him. “I know.” A hand ruffles his hair. “I don’t understand it either. I’ve spent a week as his roommate and still can’t place why it’s so easy.”
“Easy?” My eyebrows furrow, head tilting in confusion.
“Easy to trust him.” He clarifies. “Easy to bicker with him.” A sigh. “I’ve never made friends so easily.”
I give him another smile, not knowing what to say. I understand the sentiment. In the time we’ve spent together, there’s been an easy camaraderie. The smile becomes a little more sincere as I remember the time Rose tried to kick him to win a fight. It’s been nice to have someone else who agrees with me when she’s being ridiculous.
“She seems happier with him around.” It’s something I don’t even think she’s realised. She’s seemed less restrained in his presence. Cylen laughs, probably remembering the same thing I am.
“I think…” He hesitates. “I think the same can be said of him.”
My head cocks to the side. “Is he different from when you’re alone?”
“You might not have noticed since you’re either with her or with me.” He shakes his head. “But he’s less restrained when she’s present too.”
“How does he act when she’s not around?” Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever been alone with him.
Cy thinks about that for a minute. I can recognise the wheels turning in his head as he tries to think of a way to put it. My own thoughts race as I think back to moments where she hasn’t been around.
He still acts much the same, I decide. He still jokes with me and shares conversations about our day. But…If I had to describe one thing that’s different without her…
“Sad.” Cylen finally states. “When she’s not around, he seems a little more sad. As if…”
“As if he’s lost in his own head.” I finish for him. He nods, shaking his head.
“Doesn’t stop the bastard from being annoying though.” His lips turn up into a half-smile even as he says the words.
“Annoying?” My eyebrows rise into my hairline. That isn’t how I would describe him.
He shakes his head a little. “Never mind that. It isn’t really important.” I think it is, but if he doesn’t want to explain, I’ll just take his word for it.
I remember how he helped me set up camp and cook the food. The way he didn’t hesitate to try to protect me back in that cave. And the way he said ridiculous things to make me laugh when I was disappointed we hadn’t found anything. A warm feeling wells in my chest.
Trusting him is a little too easy. A part of me thinks it’s really suspicious and I shouldn’t be trusting him so much. Enough that I’d let him stay alone with my cousin and believe that he’ll keep her safe. I know Rose thinks the same. But I still want to trust him.
It would be a very sad life if you doubted everyone you met. If you saw ill-intent where there’s none to be found. I don’t want to turn as bitter as I’ve seen others become. I refuse.
Besides, Rose trusts him too. She didn’t want him to come along at first, but that wasn’t out of mistrust. My lips twitch. It was more out of annoyance than anything else. It’s what made me want him to come with us even else.
No one else can get under her skin so easily. In all the time I’ve known her, she hasn’t ever acted as childish as she does when bickering with him. She hasn’t ever felt safe enough to be a child. The realisation is heartbreaking, but it’s something I’ve noticed, nonetheless.
I don’t think she’s ever had the chance to be a child. Not in the way most have. Even with the curse, I got to be a child. I’ve never felt like I couldn’t be one. My parents may not be entirely themselves, but they still made sure I got a childhood. It’s what gave me hope. There’s a part of them still in there.
But she never got the chance. I don’t need to know everything to know that. It’s obvious in the way she doesn’t let her guard down unless it’s with the dragons or behind a warded house. In the way she’s always stepping in front of me at the slightest hint of danger.
I’m glad. I’m glad that for whatever reason, she feels safe enough to be a little childish with him. Glad that she’s being a little selfish, even if she’s doing it to win a sparring match. I’m glad that he’s here. I hope she keeps being a little childish.
Searching through my rucksack, I find a bottle of non-alcoholic drink. Pouring it into two glasses and passing him one, before holding mine up.
“Here’s to new friends and a journey started.”
A fondness enters his smile as he clinks his cup with mine. “I’ll drink to that.”
Rose isn’t the only one making new friends. Somewhere along the way, I’ve done the same. I hope he stays. Even when the curse is broken, and we’re finished with this journey. I’d hate to lose a friend.
As our cups empty, I place them back into the rucksack and lean on Cy as we watch the waves. They’re peaceful, but a bit of the earlier anxiety remains. I can’t help but feel something is wrong. Can’t shake the suspicion they’re in danger.
I hope they come back safe. I pray to all the gods in this world, those I believe and the ones I don’t, that they are unhurt. All we can do is wait. It isn’t a comforting thought.
Cylen sighs from next to me. “I hope they’re alright.” A pause. “Maybe we should have gone with them.”
My head snaps towards him. “But the ocean…”
“Somehow, this feels worse than fear.” A pause. “Well, a different kind of fear. One of the unknown. We can’t do anything but wait and it’s…Not sitting well with me.”
“I feel the same.” I put a hand over his on the sand.
He moves his hand so that our fingers are intertwined. “I still don’t want to go into an ocean.” The paleness to his face makes that obvious.
“You don’t have to.” I tell him. “Don’t push yourself too much.” I meet his eyes with a stable stare. “I mean it. Don’t doubt for a second that they would say the same.”
He smiles. “Oddly enough. I don’t.” Then shaking his head. “Hope they get back soon.”