29: They Suck
Things weren’t looking good. Roland was a do-gooder idiot, and this world or continent didn’t have black people.
Zarian wondered when the killing would begin, but held back for a little longer. He wanted to believe his party could help him in these hard social interactions.
It would get boring if he answered all of his problems with only violence. The violence would feel less special.
“Roland, we don’t have time to debate this. We must head back to Bramblevale on the double now that we’ve scouted this far without engaging the gnolls!” said another Garden Officer Cadet, the one with the Paralysis Dust skill.
“Alright, alright, I think I can step in and give y’all a helping hand.” Gilbert patted Bianca on the shoulder as he spoke with a drawl. “Why not put him in cuffs and under watch? We’re all on our way to Bramblevale to rest and relax and get some info about the land. Can we travel with you if our scary friend over there is kept under guard?”
Zarian wondered how Gilbert felt putting forth the ‘jail’ option. It wasn’t a bad idea, though. It didn’t bother Zarian because he was certain he could break free of any cuff or jail as he was now.
“I hate this,” Naomi grumbled.
“It’s what he wants,” Hannah reminded her, her gauntlet-clad hand behind the small of her back. The roller golem was waiting behind her, too.
Bianca looked distressed by the turn of events before leaning fully into Gilbert’s suggestion. “If you’re so unnerved by an innocent and harmless friend, then at least let him show you he’s nothing to fear. And maybe we can even help you with any gnoll problems along the way.”
“Must I remind you adventurers aren’t allowed in the Eternal Garden Kingdom?” Roland growled while lowering his sword.
He was listening to them. The proposal wasn’t without merit.
“Can you include us as temporary conscripts of your unit, officer?” Naomi asked.
“Well, yes, I can, but you’ll–”
“Then there’s no problem. You can do the paperwork when we get to Bramblevale. I’ll be expecting field rations for all of us. And I want to see where and how Zarian will be contained,” Naomi demanded with a whip-crack authority in her voice. “Once he’s contained, I mustn’t have to explain he won’t be harmed, do I, officer? You won’t dishonor yourself by attacking a man who did you no harm under witness of gods, would you? Or are you not good?”
Roland lost some nerve. He wasn’t a small man. He stood a head taller than her, but Naomi’s palpable force of will was undeniable.
“Yeah, what she said!” Bianca added with a shining cheer.
“Okay, okay, I seem to understand the situation better. Let’s go about this with your … suggestions.” Roland’s hard stance collapsed, agreeing to their terms despite his position of authority and the obvious numeral advantage of his army unit.
Zarian wasn’t sure how Naomi enforced her will so easily compared to Bianca’s attempts, but maybe there was more to Naomi’s high Willpower than she let on. Or she was so intimidating she should get a trait for that.
“My trait didn’t work like I wanted,” Bianca murmured when Roland walked away, leaving his foot soldiers with orders to watch Zarian’s party.
“It did and didn’t,” Gilbert drawled. “You screwed up by making us out to be foreigners, so Roland went on guard. But I think things worked out anyway because it didn’t break out into a fight.”
“You want to give me your eyes, boy?” Naomi asked, glaring at the nearest foot soldier gawking at her. “The way you have those eyes glued on me makes me think you want to give them up.”
The foot soldier took a few steps back and whispered loudly to his comrades. They called Naomi a ‘black she-devil’ or ‘evil-touched woman’ or ‘tainted one.’
Naomi sighed, one hand on her hip, the other hand balled into a loose fist. “This is going to get old fast,” she grunted.
“Just blame me,” Zarian offered.
“No, sir. Not for this one.”
The others didn’t know what to say. Gilbert looked a little sorry for laughing earlier.
Thankfully, a man carrying a box appeared to hurry things along. He set the box down and flipped it open, showing thick cuffs that could fit the wrists and forearms. They had a single key hole in the middle with visible runes that glowed with a dull gray blue color.
“Come forward, evil one, and get a hold of these on you. The Basic Lawkeep Aura Cuffs can strip you of fifteen levels of aura. If all you are is Level 15, then you’ll feel like your old Level 1 self again.” The foot soldier squinted at Zarian. “Say, what level are you?”
“A level of power that’ll change as soon as I put these on.”
Zarian walked out of the tunnel exit and heard the gathered soldiers gasp at the full sight of him. They would see the dense darkness hiding his face under his hood. They wouldn’t see much else as his Parasite Cloak reached to the ground, hiding his body along with his stride.
From the outer perspective, it would look like he was gliding across the cobbled ground to reach the box with the special cuffs. The men watching him shook with fright or glared with anger, hands tight around their weapons.
Zarian saw the cuffs were already open and ready to accept him.
“I’ll put them on for you,” said the grunt.
“I got it.” Zarian had Para seize the cuffs with her tentacles. A dozen men jumped in alarm while others readied for a fight.
Zarian ignored them and stuck his arms out in the open. He grimaced at the direct touch of twin sunlight. Para slapped the cuffs on him, locking them, and he noted the changes in his aura.
It felt like he lost five levels worth of natural aura. He could recover that plus a little more with his Overpower trait.
Is that it? That’s disappointing.
Zarian had expected better. Or maybe his Aura Channeler trait was that strong. These poor bastards had no idea he could screw up their day at any time
Holding his cuffed arms in front of him, he watched the soldiers smile and cajole. They celebrated as if they caught a great evil villain themselves.
“We don’t have special jail wagons to waste on you, evil one,” spat a young soldier named Herold. “And we’re low on field rations until we get back to Bramblevale, so your companions get served first before you, if anything remains.”
“I would prefer that. I’ve gone hungry plenty of times before, so I’ll be okay,” Zarian said smoothly. “They, on the other hand, are still growing and in much more need than me.”
“Why not hunt from the land?” Gilbert asked.
“That’s the property of the Eternal Garden King, and under the witness of Good God Kingsblood, we shan’t be taking what’s belonging to a king and a god and their picked Rose Nobles,” Herold said.
“Oh.”
“Now stop your nickering and go over there to that kart where you can get proper gear. You all look terrible and unsuited for real soldiering with your fancy and unlawful adventurer ways. If the gnolls attack, expect to get thrown in first as conscripts ought to be. You unlawful adventurers from the World of Swamps and Princess look soft to me, only good enough to feed them evil, murderous mutts.”
Herold gave them all a nasty laugh.
Zarian wondered if Herold would laugh if he had parasitic strings running through his flesh.
Para quivered subtly, her bloodlust and hunger rising.
Zarian let the entertaining thought run its course before pushing it aside. Herold was a nobody. He didn’t matter.
The officers placed twenty men on guard around Zarian as the soldiers picked up their stuff and cleared out their camp. At all times, Naomi made sure one party member stayed close with Zarian and monitored the soldiers serving as his ‘guards.’
Hannah took up that role since she wasn’t interested in any common gear. She also liked the extra space afforded to Zarian inside a circle of guards, making it easier for her to experiment with her Roller Golem and Runic Gauntlet.
Naomi and the others were occupied by back-and-forth talks with the young officers – Naomi pretty much took the lead role while Bianca used her Shining Trust to enhance Naomi’s demands and arguments.
Gilbert stood as the big muscular man that he was and as a healer – which shook the entire army unit when Gilbert let that out. The soldiers lacked a healer, strangely enough, so Gilbert’s value along with the rest of Zarian’s party shot up.
Herold and his adventurer-hating nonsense were nowhere to be seen or heard from now.
We should probably lead with us having a healer the next time my evil alignment causes social issues, Zarian thought. Good to know now.
“What game are you playing, Zarian?” Hannah asked under her breath as the late afternoon turned darker.
“Crouching tiger, hidden dragon.”
“That feels risky to me, but I get it. The moral alignments will make everything harder. So you have to ‘hide’ yourself in plain sight.” Hannah grimaced. “I will fight them with everything I have if they harm you, okay? You more than earn that from me.”
Zarian smiled, feeling warm inside. “Just be prepared in case the gnolls attack.”
“I’ve only played a little of the tabletop game. I don’t know what those are.”
“It’ll be some sort of monster that tries to hit humans with crude weapons and eat them at the same time. Maybe it’ll look like a hyena-man, maybe not.” Zarian chuckled as he glanced around at his ring of guards.
They kept trying to hide their curious gazes of Zarian, the Roller Golem, and Hannah. Zarian imagined the stares for Naomi were much worse. He’d already caught a few staring hard at her backside.
These guys had seen little outside of their usual day-to-day. They were sheltered soldiers compared to the diverse and modernized background of Zarian’s party.
There were also no women among the soldiers.
Zarian’s female party members must’ve noticed that from the getgo. Hence Hannah staying close to him while the others had Gilbert nearby.
Yeah, sure, Naomi would be fine, but better safe than sorry.
We have a lot to learn and watch out for in this world.
At the very least, there was plenty for Zarian to examine now. Despite the obvious issues and dangers, it was still amazing to see actual humans from another world.
The soldiers moved differently, spoke archaically, harkening to old English, and used weird animals as beasts of burden to haul their carts. The cart pullers looked like six-legged oxen with six horns curled out from their heads.
They were called Hill-Striding Hexaox, and they were at most Level 15. They kept snorting and shuffling away from Zarian’s position, the beasts bellowing at him in warning.
That might be Para’s fault. The hexaox sensed the unnatural predator among them.
Zarian gave the Parasite Cloak mental promises to feed her later as he kept looking around. Not all the supply carts had hexaoxen pulling them. A few dozen of the soldiers took turns pulling carts where they were lacking a beast of burden.
These guys feel inferior for the best fighting men across all the Walled Continent, Zarian noted.
The soldiers were all young, most of them several years younger than Zarian. And the officers sound like they were trying to wrangle the army unit like herding children while talking from a position of weakness or uncertainty the longer Naomi, Bianca, and Gilbert dug into them.
I bet Naomi is finding all of this disgusting as a hardcore Marine. Bianca’s doing her best. And Gilbert’s probably the most cool headed one.
Zarian saw it all as fascinating, even while cuffed and under constant watch from soldiers who would stab him in the back if given the chance. He could overpower them, but the real question he wanted answered was how well they could fight.
They’d grown up here in the Infinita Star System. They probably could swing their swords and adapt to encounters better than Zarian’s party even if they were technically weaker at an individual basis.
Though, his confidence in their potential abilities waned as Zarian listened to them further. They talked about their fears, frustrations, and vices openly and loudly, paying more attention to conversations than their environment.
Having fears made sense, especially when Zarian overheard there were monsters in the mid to high Level 30s called Forest Wulvers in the northern parts of Bramble Wolf Forest. Apparently, those monsters were ferocious killers and gluttons without mercy.
They sounded like a fun fight for Zarian, but he understood how scary those would be to weaker men.
If they’re so worried, shouldn’t they pay closer attention to their environment?
Zarian felt annoyed with their inattentiveness.
Hours into their force march to Bramblevale, they reached the Bramble Wolf Forest. It was on the eve of sunset when the army entered the big, fortified tree line.
The gnolls chose that moment to unleash their attack, which was unsurprising for Zarian. That was a suitable spot to set up an ambush. All the young officers and their subordinates reacted a few steps too slowly, strangely enough.
Now Zarian was left with a choice to make.
Should I help? Or should I observe?
One of his guards collapsed with a hideous arrow wreath of thorns running through his skull. Zarian looked left and right as the fighting pushed the soldiers even further on the back foot.
Oh … they suck. They really, really suck.