Naruto: The King Behind the Curtain

"Could it be that her previous relentless attempts to kill me weren't because I made her the female lead, but because I didn't write enough about her? Then for my next book, hehehehe..."

As Jiraiya-sama was lost in his fantasies, Seiki suddenly asked, "Jiraiya-sama, you like Tsunade-sensei, right?"

"Spit!" Jiraiya spat out his saliva in shock, looking at Seiki in terror while frantically waving his hands. "M-Me? How could I possibly like that violent woman Tsunade? Ha, haha, hahaha, that's not funny at all."

Seeing Jiraiya's flustered attempt to hide his feelings, Seiki sighed inwardly — looks like he'd have to double as a local gossip auntie this time!

Seiki knew all too well — being a pervert was just part of being a man.

Especially with a veteran old pervert like Jiraiya, mere persuasion or beating wouldn't make him reform.

There were only two ways to fundamentally eliminate those harmful books:

First, castrate him!

Second, put shackles on this free-spirited man!

Thinking about this, Seiki couldn't help but sigh mentally, "I'm really going through great lengths to protect top-tier useful idiots like Kakashi from getting corrupted!"

Noticing Seiki's silence, Jiraiya suddenly felt uneasy himself. "Actually, I'm not saying Tsunade is bad or anything. It's just… I'm a drifter who never stops moving — I won't truly halt until death takes me."

Seiki blinked his eyes. "Not even when Tsunade-sensei gets hurt?"

Jiraiya's eyes widened and he instinctively shouted, "Who dares!"

Seiki gave a meaningful laugh. "A *wanderer*?"

Feeling Seiki's intense stare, Jiraiya flushed slightly and faked a couple of coughs. "Ha, who could possibly bully her anyway!"

Seiki sighed, "If it were the old Tsunade-sensei, there wouldn't be any problem, of course. But Jiraiya-sama, you should also know about sensei's current situation, right?"

Jiraiya scratched his hands nervously while chuckling. "But there's still Sarutobi-sensei and Orochimaru too!"

Seiki stared straight at him until Jiraiya felt increasingly guilty before finally speaking. "Fine, I'll pretend Jiraiya-sama knows nothing at all. I can feel that sensei wants to leave the village."

"If her fear of blood gets out to the Enemy Ninja Villages, they definitely won't miss this opportunity."

Jiraiya remained silent for a long time before finally giving a bitter smile. "So you're trying to push Tsunade onto me like this?"

Seiki smiled gently. "I just think that if it's you, Jiraiya-sama, you might be able to truly awaken sensei from that nightmare!"

Hearing Shizune mention that "nightmare," Jiraiya frowned slightly, pinching the space between his eyebrows before casually sitting down on the nearby grass in a relaxed posture.

"You can have a seat too."

Looking like a well-behaved child, Seiki sat opposite Jiraiya.

"Actually, Tsunade had a lover before. His name was Dan Kato…"

"I know."

Jiraiya opened wide his eyes in surprise. "Did Tsunade tell you even that much?"

Seiki shook his head. "I heard it from Shizune."

"Oh, that little girl around Tsunade..." Jiraiya said, his face suddenly twitching. "Wait a second—you're not trying to rope me into being a bodyguard for your little girlfriend, are you?"

Seiki sighed helplessly. "Jiraiya-sama, what are you talking about? I'm only six years old!"

Jiraiya gave him a sideways glance. "You *are* six, right? And yet you talk like some kind of love guru!"

Seiki spread his hands wide. "Although this might sound a bit impolite, Jiraiya-sama, the number of conversations you've had with girls probably doesn't even match mine."

Snap!

Jiraiya clutched his chest, as if something inside had just cracked.

Seiki pressed on. "Now, please recall—how many girls have you actually spoken to more than ten times?"

Jiraiya opened his mouth, looking dazed—he clearly already had an answer in mind.

"Now that I think about it, has there even been a girl who spoke more than three sentences to me besides Tsunade?"

Realizing this, Jiraiya exclaimed in shock. "So does this mean I won't even have a say in my whole life?"

Seeing Jiraiya's anxious and hesitant expression, Seiki muttered inwardly, "There really aren't any at all! I originally planned to set the threshold at thirty conversations!"

After a pause, Jiraiya asked in an unusually awkward tone, "Hey, just how high does Dan rank in Tsunade's heart?"

"Very, very high, I suppose. After all, memories tend to beautify someone's image."

Jiraiya's face fell.

Seiki replied in frustration, "What are you competing with a dead person for? Or would you prefer Tsunade-sensei to be someone cold-hearted enough to forget her memories?"

Jiraiya suddenly realized—right, if Tsunade truly forgot her past, would she still be the Tsunade he knew?

Seeing the timing was right, Seiki launched his final blow. "Just reminding you—one may not have talked to many girls, but there are plenty of men who'd love to interact with Tsunade-sensei!"

Jiraiya's face darkened, yet he couldn't deny it—if one could endure possible wife beatings, Tsunade indeed was far more popular than him.

Thinking about it, Jiraiya grew restless. "No way! Looks like this sage needs to take initiative!"

"Should I give her something? But I don't really have anything worth giving her! A toad? Or maybe my personally signed book?"

Seeing Jiraiya eager to go seek his doom, Seiki quickly stopped him. "Jiraiya-sama, I still have a small favor to ask of you. During this time, you can also calm down and think things through!"

Jiraiya thought it over and gave a slow nod. "You've got a point. I should really give this some thought. So, what do you need?"

"I just feel like he's going to end up dying horribly," Seiki sighed internally before saying, "I hope you could give me several drops of the Toad Oil from Mount Myoboku."

"Oh, that's easy." Jiraiya casually agreed but quickly caught himself. "Wait a second—you're saying Tsunade wants you to learn [Sage Art]?"

"This is too reckless. Considering your current state..."

"Jiraiya-sama, you misunderstood," Seiki explained. "It's not for me to use."

"Not you then?" Jiraiya blinked, then broke into his usual sly grin. "Could it be Tsunade wants to learn the Sage Art of Shikkotsu Forest? Heh heh, I wonder what she'd look like transformed?"

Noticing the way Jiraiya's mind was already wandering, Seiki quickly clarified, "It's for a classmate of mine. One section of his meridians is nearly completely severed. Repairing it is extremely difficult. Only the gentlest energy could possibly reconnect his broken meridians!"

"Gentle, huh?" Jiraiya's expression turned serious. "But do you understand that too much gentleness can turn into violence?"

"Or maybe put it this way — Natural Energy seems gentle, but it's dangerously misleading. Touch it, and you might really become one with nature... for good."

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