Naruto: Tango with Death

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As an avid fan of fanfiction, or maybe fiction in general, the first thing that came to my mind when I found myself inside the body of a toddler wasn't how I ended up there, or who put me there, but rather whether this was a transmigration or a reincarnation.

To be honest I would feel quite bad if I possessed the body of a baby, I'm not some evil old hag who possesses babies to retain her eternal youth, I'm only a young woman who ended up here against her own will.

Well, it took me some time to realize that it didn't really matter. My first days were rather short, I was sleeping a lot. And failing to accomplish basic things, such as holding my bladder. God that was embarrassing.

Anyway, whoever sent me here seemed to be a beginner, he forgot the most important thing in the reincarnator starter pack, the Golden Finger. The Cheat. Call it however you want, he didn't give me the thing that would make me unique, that would make my path to godhood super duper easy!

And that fucker didn't forget to make me an orphan, so I am starting to wonder whether that was intentional or not… considering it should be an omni-everything being, he probably knows my thoughts, and my future thoughts, and know I am disrespecting him in my mind… And yes, I know saying omni-everything is a pleonasm, but I can think whatever I want.

Focus, Sukaina. I know your days are very boring, but stop thinking about useless stuff.

Now, I have been here for a week, and I just learned which world I ended up in. I knew for a fact I wasn't on Earth, not mine at least, as I could feel an energy inside me. Go figure what kind of energy it is, I can make it circulate around my body but that doesn't really do anything.

When I first felt it I feared I was in some kind of cultivation world, which freaked me out, I don't want to be stranded into a world of unreasonable people that kill humans on a whim, have young masters try to rape every girl they see on the streets and rapists being considered heroes. That would be especially terrible for me because I well intend on growing up into a beauty. How? Have faith because I said I would. Take that, body of mine.

Thankfully, today I learned that I am currently in Rosewood, an orphanage that was created exclusively with the barks of trees the first Hokage, Hashirama Senju, created. If that isn't enough to understand where I am, let me clarify, I am in Konoha. Land of Fire. Naruto World.

While I was thankful to the two boys whom I overheard talking about the orphanage's origin, I felt a little scared. Don't misunderstand me, I am a fan of the anime and the manga, and it is hundreds of times better than a cultivation world, but I mean… I am in a world where walking disasters are a thing.

Still, I guess it's better than most worlds I could land in. Here at least I will have the opportunity to learn how to survive and actually have a shot. And even if I live for my whole life as a civilian, I should be pretty safe… Oh right, fuck you too Pain.

Well, not that I intended to do so anyway. I spent my past life dreaming about fantasy, I'm not gonna live as a civilian when I have such an opportunity presented to me.

Now that I know which world I am in, I need to know when. That could make a big difference. I know I am after the Shodai Hokage, you don't refer to someone as Lord First if there isn't a Second, so I am at least beyond Hashirama's death, and considering how the orphanage looks I don't think I am too far back into the timeline.

But I'm definitely not in the monstrosity known as Boruto, the orphanage is not modern enough and I can't hear any train or vehicles outside, only voices.

Well, I guess I will have to wait some more and eavesdrop on other people to learn when I am. Thanks mom for teaching me Japanese. Never thought I would ever say that, I literally feigned sickness and injuries in my past life not to learn my mother's language, English was just fine to me, but I guess she was right in the end. Thankfully she isn't here to rub it in my face…

Thinking about it, I am glad whoever or whatever sent me here made me an orphan. I don't think I would have been able to accept new parents, I loved mine too much. Although they died a few years ago, they still… well, enough sad memories. At least they won't cry over my disappearance, since I cried theirs.

I said enough sad memories!

Fuck, I got tears in my eyes. Okay, go to sleep, stop crying. Shut up. Sleep. Sleep you moron. I hate me. Maybe not.

And like that I cursed myself to sleep. Pretty damn efficient I must say.

Over the course of the next three weeks, I was able to learn a few things. First, the parents of this body… I'm not going to call them mine, ever… were assassinated.

They weren't killed by some guy who wanted to play god and plunge the world in pain or another delusional dude who wants to put everyone to sleep and evade reality. No, they were killed by a ninja who was turned crazy by the war. I didn't know much, but I think he was driven mad by the things he had to do in the war. Ninja PTSD.

Shinobi life isn't easy, and apparently that one guy had enough and went on a rampage, and this body's parents were among the victims. Apparently, Konoha isn't a fairy land, and there are criminals and normal humans in here. Why can't it be like the anime, there were enough homicidal maniacs already…

I would like to say I am saddened by the death of this body's parents, but I'm not. I've never been one to cry over the death of people I don't know, it's hypocritical if you ask me.

Actually, I think the only deaths I ever cried for were my parents. I mean my real parents, in my other body, those I loved and knew. Never knew my grandparents back there, and I was an only child. I'm not some sociopath am I?

Wait, no, I'm not. A sociopath doesn't feel any emotions, right? Well, then I'm assured, because I god damn panicked when I learned who the current Hokage was. Minato Namikaze, Yellow Flash of Konoha.

Annnnnnd Kyuubi already spat his Bijudama on the village a few months ago, meaning I am in an AU. Alternate Universe. Unpredictable Universe. Plot-foresight-is-useless Universe. Death-welcomes-you-with-a-hug Universe.

So that's how my greatest weapon, according to Terror Infinity, went poof. If Hiruzen sacrificed his life to save the village and the Minato Kushina couple, then what else could have changed? Maybe Nagato was born earlier and will wipe out the village tomorrow? Maybe Kaguya will wake up in a week and put us all in Infinite Tsukuyomi.

I may have the tendency of overreacting. Urgh, time for another time skip anyway. I mean, it's not like I did a lot of things. I think I am slightly less than a year old, I can already walk unsteadily and somewhat talk, but there isn't really a lot to do in the orphanage.

I could go talk to the other kids, but there are so many reasons why I'm not. I've never been a social person, and I don't want to hang out with toddlers who can barely talk. I would rather stay in my little corner and read. Speaking of which, the matron was very surprised when she saw me reading a book, I just said I liked the Kanjis, feigning an inability to read.

Guess they haven't developed hiragana and katakana in Naruto though. For information, it's the name of the two alphabets mainly used in modern day Japan. Or that's what I remember from my mom's lessons, never got the opportunity to go there. I got a better version of it in the end, in a sense.

I really need to stop thinking about my past life, I have a new life, I should think about this one, not the old one.

And so for the next two years, I did basically nothing other than reading. Curiously, no other kid tried to approach me, I must have some kind of evil dark aura that scares them away, no one wants to talk to me, much to my pleasure to be honest.

I managed to learn quite a lot about the history of this world in those two years, I couldn't read anything about chakra or anything battle related, but learning history and geography was interesting, and would help me with the academy later on. For example, I learned that the calendar of this world isn't based on Naruto's birth, I know, shocking, but rather on actual events.

One in particular, as our current calendar starts with the appearance of the Goddess' descent on earth. You guess it, Kaguya's arrival on Earth. Crazy to think our calendar is based on that madwoman. For information, I, alongside the whole Rookie 9 generation, am born on year 983. 4th of January 983 for me. Same day as my past life, just not the same year.

About my trainings, I didn't plan on starting before the academy, I didn't see any reason to do so other than stroking my ego by beating all the talented kids on first day. Well, I admit it was also a little about my laziness, I didn't plan on spending my entire childhood training.

But man plans, and God laughs. Or woman and Six Paths Sage, but you get it.

About a week before my 4th birthday, Konoha invited Kumo to finally sign peace treaties during the Rinne Festival, a holiday celebrated throughout the whole ninja world which takes places a couple of days after Christmas.

And that's when this AU decided to fuck me over. Make no mistake, Kumo acted just as they were supposed to in the show, meaning like the scumbags they are and tried to kidnap the Hyuuga Heiress, Hinata, while signing peace treaties.

And just like in the original universe, Hiashi killed the Head Ninja of Kumo for trying to abduct his daughter, which is a perfectly reasonable reaction for a ninja, aka killer.

But you see, the ninja world isn't a reasonable place. Nor is the Earth actually, but I digress. Until that event, everything pretty much followed the original plot except for Minato and Kushina's survival, and although I felt sorry for Hinata who would be traumatized by the experience, it wasn't like I could do anything, as I already said I don't have a cheat that allows me to become as strong as the strongest Jonin in Kumo at the mere age of three. Yes, strongest Jonin, Raikage is a Kage, not a Jonin, dumbass. And fuck you too Killer-B, or whoever hosted the Eight Tails, I stand with what I said.

Then, maybe that's what they call karma, I was fucked over.

In this world, the Hokage wasn't an old man who was getting weaker every year and who was tired after going through three world wars, it was a young blond man who got the name of the Yellow Flash of Konoha during the last war because of the thousands of enemy Shinobi he killed.

And unlike Hiruzen, Minato didn't bend the knee before Kumo, and didn't offer them Hiashi, or Hizashi, and instead threatened Kumo with war. While it warmed my heart to know the military leader(that sounds so wrong) of my village cared so much about his forces and wouldn't sacrifice them for no reason, I was afraid.

Why? Well, Kumo infiltrated Konoha during the Second War to kidnap Kushina, and infiltrated it during peace treaties to kidnap a little girl. If you ask me who had the most chances of sneaking into Konoha and killing civilians to win the war, I would answer Kiri, then Kumo. They aren't called the Bloody Mist or whatever for no reason.

Being top two wasn't a good thing, especially in a world where last place had like 50% chances of doing it. For the first few days I hoped the tension would lower and everything would be fine, but it went exactly the opposite way, and the Raikage ended up ripping the peace treaties to shreds before leaving the village with his entourage.

Yay, maybe we are at war… Would have said a protagonist with a system that gives them strength the more people they kill. Me? I just said…

Fuck. And got my ass handed to me by the matron.