NOVEL WEB Arc 1, Ch.5: A visit to the doctor
I was incredibly fidgety. I knew the doctor since I was a child and he was a nice, middle-aged guy that treated me like his nephew, but all the pushed down fear of having some sickness or problem with my brain bubbled up again.
Hamada patted my shoulders, sitting right in front of me.
“Let’s skip all the formalities since you’re so tense. What’s up?”
I had thought of reasons to have my brain checked, close enough to my actual situation that it wouldn’t seem I was lying.
“I’ve got blotches in my sight and sometimes see things double. My last eye-test was perfectly fine.”
The man’s face hardened immediately. He leaned back in his chair. “Did you get hit on your head lately? Fell?”
I nodded after a moment of contemplation. In fact, I had. I hadn’t really thought about it, but I had slipped when walking down our stairs with socks the day before the UI appeared.
“You're worried that your brain is affected somehow, aren't you? Alright. We’ll do some tests.” He gently patted my back when passing me, calling out to someone out of the door. I sighed in relief. At least I was getting checked.
...I just didn’t think about the fact that we were personally acquainted with our doctor. Even though I was technically an adult and could do all those examinations on my own. By the time I walked into the waiting room to await my test results, I was run over by people. My mother’s frightened voice was shouting into my ear.
“Why didn’t you tell us!”
Everyone was talking over each other, tugging at me. Only Haru was standing at the side, trying to calm my nervous family while I was completely out of it, sorting my thoughts and mumbling replies.
Only Hamada could coax my family into a private room, where my father and brother opted to press him while Risa and my mother were clinging to me, squashing my body.
“I had a feeling you hadn’t informed them”, scolded Hamada from the side. “There’s no way I wouldn’t call them if you appear here with anything more than a cold.”
Yeah, I would have thought of that, too, if I hadn’t been so upset.
He then proceeded to loudly clap his hands, stunning my family into silence, all focus on him. With a professionally calm attitude, he quickly summarized the situation.
“We’re through with all the needed tests. Since the situation might be urgent, the results will be out in a few hours. If you want to, you can go home in the meantime and I’ll call once they’re finished.”
My father was the one to decide we’d go out but keep in close vicinity to the hospital. All of us went out to eat together, a rare occasion. It could have been nice if the mood wasn’t at the bottom.
“Haru, he told you”, Daichi said into the silence, glaring at Haru. He wasn’t truly angry, I knew. He rarely was truly angry with someone. He just looked sick with worry, like the rest of them.
Haru sighed. “He didn’t want to worry you all until he has the actual results. Mum, Dad, you still have to work, Risa is preparing for her competition and Daichi needs to study all day for his scholarship. You know exactly you wouldn’t have another thought all week if he told you.”
I was sitting in my seat, hunched down, letting Haru do all the talking. Only when our food arrived had they all grudgingly accepted that reasoning.
“It might just be a temporary problem”, I tried to calm them.
“Of course it is just temporary!”, my father declared with a scrunched face. I didn’t say anything else. I was just happy to have such a loving family.
Our worries did indeed prove to be unfounded. We spent several hours on edge, then ran back to the hospital when Hamada called. The first sentence he said before we even said down was: “Everything is fine.”
We deflated, plopping down into the chairs. He let us breathe for five seconds, then pulled out several sheets and summarized his findings.
“He’s healthy, his eyes are alright and there’s nothing wrong with his brain. ...I admit there’s one area that looks weirdly active”, he frowned at the sheet, “but that’s nothing negative.”
“Why is he having problems with his sight then?”, my mother nervously asked and Hamada placed a single sheet in front of us. A lot of numbers next to weird names, some marked red.
“Stress”, he declared simply. “Don’t underestimate the temporary and lasting damages stress can cause to our bodies. Your stress-level is through the roof, Riku. You might want to talk about that.”
Lots of eyes on me.
Uh, I like guys, one of my teachers hates me, I’m lacking behind in several subjects, my future terrifies me and oh, did I mention I suddenly have a dating system?
Yeah, right. I uncomfortable hid my head between my shoulders. Nu-uh. I didn’t wanna talk.
Seeing my silence, my father almost stood up, but my mother pressed him down again. She glanced over at Haru. “Does he tell you?”
Haru hummed, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. “Some? I dunno how much compared to the whole picture, but some things at least.”
“Any chance he’d let us in on it, too?”
Hey, hey! I’m sitting right between you two, okay?!
“Don’t think so.”
Collective sighs. Hamada watched us in amusement and I was pouting. Mom pulled me into a hug and turned to face Hamada.
“Would we make it worse if we tried to squeeze it out of him?”
“Absolutely.”
Hamada was on a first-name basis with all of us children. He was direct enough with his words, and I was thankful for it. Still, he appealed to me.
“Whatever worries you can share with all of them, please do so. Don’t bottle it up. We’ll do another full check-up soon, and if things aren’t better by then or you call because the symptoms get worse, I’ll get you professional help and a larger examination.”
I nodded. “Alright.”
We left much lighter than we had come. In the car, Risa started to cry a bit, hitting me. “I thought you were dying or something! Asshole! Don’t worry us like that!”
I took the hits without complaining. Even Daichi squeezed in a hit between hers. My arms were all bruised by the time I got home, but I felt warm inside.
All five of them were catering for me, rolling me up like a burrito on the sofa, starting one of my favourite movies and burying me in food and snacks. I nibbled on some pieces of an apple, using my one freed arm to poke my brother.
He looked at me, ruffling through my hair and making a questioning hum.
“Can you help me study?”, I muttered. I didn’t like having to ask for help but I had zero self-control when it was about studying. I mean, I couldn’t even keep my attention during class. It wasn’t surprising I was lacking behind, but I lacked the will to change it on my own. “Just a bit.”
“Of course I will. Don’t worry, your brother’s got you.”
I was cuddled all evening, mostly by my mother and sisters. My father uncharacteristically patted my head and my brother fetched his things to study while accompanying me on the sofa. Haru was taking the other side, comfortably using my burrito-self as a pillow.
She quietly whispered something, making sure no one else would hear her. “I understand not talking about the game system, but don’t you think you could at least…”
She trailed off, but I knew what she meant, of course.
“No.”
“Come on, Riku. We’re all on your side, not just I.”
“No.”
“What are you worrying about?”
I hid my face in the numerous blankets.
I just don’t want to say it out loud, ah! I don’t wanna admit it more than I need to! You can’t imagine how awkward it is to be different! Not knowing how someone will react, it’s scary, okay? Who says high schoolers are adults already? We’re obviously just kids trying to act all mature! Don’t expect us to handle things logically!
I sighed into the blankets, a very long sigh that even alerted Daichi. He glared at Haru, who left my shoulder and shrugged.
“Alright. Risking that you’ll hate me for this, but… Riku likes guys.”1This is a plot device. Don't actually out other people in reality unless they ask you to!
She raised her voice loud enough for the rest of my family - who were still dancing around the living room - to hear. I jolted up.
“Haru!”
She squeaked and hid her face with a pillow she snatched from the side.
Daichi was the first to react to the revelation other than me, who felt his whole face flushing and muscles tensing.
My brother gripped my free arm, half getting off the sofa to enter my field of view and talking so fast he almost stumbled over his words.
“No problem! That is no problem! We don’t mind, okay? You’re my brother, you can like whoever you want!”
I reckon they all came to the conclusion that any sort of stunned silence might give me the wrong idea. For the third time today I was buried underneath love and pats and worried voices.
My brain just fried. I sunk into the blankets, emptied my head of all thoughts and allowed them to fuss over me. The only thought I allowed to surface was a simple conclusion:
Ah, they really love me, they don’t mind at all.
