My Company Is Black

#033

Gyo-ha personally brewed coffee for Hwi-kyung, who had come to work early. It was surprising to see a capsule coffee machine, usually found in company break rooms, at home. Hwi-kyung stared blankly at the black coffee Gyo-ha had brewed. It smelled better than the Americano sold at most franchise cafes.

What was entirely new to Hwi-kyung was completely natural for Gyo-ha. Even while cleaning the coffee machine, Jung Hwi-kyung never thought of using it to brew coffee. He thought he shouldn’t touch it unnecessarily for fear of breaking it.

But Gyo-ha used the coffee machine without much thought. While it was natural since it was his, Hwi-kyung found it novel. Although they were both regressors, Lee Gyo-ha often seemed like he was from another world.

“Did you eat breakfast before coming?”

“No.”

“I told you to eat properly.”

“I don’t usually eat breakfast.”

It was more beneficial to sleep 5 minutes longer than to eat breakfast. Appetite rarely won over the desire to sleep. As an office worker, he even tried to catch some sleep on the way to work.

But Gyo-ha seemed to think differently from Hwi-kyung. When he heard that Hwi-kyung didn’t eat breakfast, Gyo-ha surprised him by saying, “Won’t you lose muscle mass then?”

Do office workers even have muscles to lose? For someone who sits in front of a computer for at least 8 hours a day, muscle loss from not eating breakfast wasn’t a big deal.

However, before Hwi-kyung could argue, Gyo-ha started making French toast, whisking eggs and taking out frozen bread. His hand sprinkling coarse sugar on the nicely browned toast seemed quite practiced.

Hwi-kyung suddenly wondered how many people Gyo-ha had made coffee and breakfast for like this. He couldn’t bring himself to ask out loud how many lovers Gyo-ha had had.

“Should I fry some Vienna sausages too?”

“No.”

“Hmm, I wonder if that’s enough to fill you up.”

“You’ve already made three slices. You should eat some too, Gyo-ha-ssi.”

“I’ve already eaten.”

Gyo-ha naturally tidied up the kitchen and sat down across from Hwi-kyung. Contrary to appearances, Lee Gyo-ha seemed to be quite capable in daily life. As Hwi-kyung had noticed when he peeled apples at the hospital, Gyo-ha was also quite dexterous.

Hwi-kyung poked at the corner of the beautifully cooked French toast, without a single burnt spot, with his fork. This situation felt awkward. It had been so long since someone had prepared breakfast for him like this.

In the previous cycle, Gyo-ha had diligently bought coffee or sandwiches for him, claiming to take care of him, but those were purchased, not homemade. Somehow, it felt like he was receiving treatment beyond his station.

“Don’t you like French toast? This is something I’m really good at making.”

“No, I like it.”

“Should I get some jam? Is it too bland?”

“It’s fine, please just sit down.”

“I’m a bit nervous since this is the first time I’m making this for you.”

Gyo-ha sheepishly rubbed his cheek, saying he would have made rice if he had washed some. Hwi-kyung cut the French toast into small pieces and pushed them into his mouth. The coarse sugar sprinkled on top left a lingering sweetness on his tongue.

When Hwi-kyung was young, he had many opportunities to eat such toast. On weekday mornings, before going to work, Hwi-kyung’s mother would make a lot of French toast and leave. Sometimes, there would just be money left instead.

He preferred having French toast on the table rather than just money lying around. Although the cold toast was more greasy than tasty, Hwi-kyung always ate it all without leaving any. He knew that was how he could have it again next time.

That’s why Hwi-kyung’s mother thought until the end that her son liked cold French toast.

“Hwi-kyung-ssi.”

“Yes.”

“Why are you crying?”

“…”

“Never mind. Just cry. I’ll pretend I didn’t see.”

The warm and sweet toast went really well with the freshly brewed coffee. It surely didn’t taste like this back then. It used to taste greasy and cloying, sometimes making him nauseous, but he had to force himself to eat it. It was strange.

Lee Gyo-ha belonged to such a different world from Jung Hwi-kyung that Hwi-kyung kept revealing his vulnerabilities to him. Although Gyo-ha was someone who couldn’t understand him at all, Hwi-kyung knew he wasn’t someone who would criticize, so he often let his guard down around Gyo-ha.

When he relaxed completely, these weak points would pop out. Things he easily hid from others kept leaking out in front of Gyo-ha, even when he tried to hold them back. Jung Hwi-kyung was too tired, and Lee Gyo-ha was excessively kind. The two were certainly not compatible.

Hwi-kyung didn’t even realize he was crying until Gyo-ha mentioned it. His head was dizzy from lack of proper sleep. Maybe he really had suffered a head injury from being hit by Sung-ha.

Remembering his childhood that he had half-forgotten, his firmly held emotions constantly softening… No matter how he thought about it, these weren’t good signs.

“Don’t do this for me next time.”

An unintentionally brusque comment slipped out. Even hearing such words, Gyo-ha just smiled.

“Okay.”

“…”

“I won’t do it next time.”

“…”

“Next time, I’ll do something even better…”

“…Okay.”

“Next time, smile for me. Don’t cry.”

Who do you think you are? The two were in the same space, still thinking different thoughts.

* * *

On the weekend of Gyo-ha’s family gathering, Hwi-kyung was as nervous as when he first went for a big company interview.

Even after living fourteen lives, his heart was pounding. He thought he wouldn’t be nervous presenting a business proposal in front of the chairman, but facing the situation where he was misunderstood as being liked by the chairman’s son made his hands tremble.

“Nothing bad will happen, right?”

Unlike the trembling Hwi-kyung, Gyo-ha was relaxed. His father and older sister weren’t people who would treat Jung Hwi-kyung carelessly like the foolish Sung-ha.

Although Lee Jung-hye was eager to use Jung Hwi-kyung as material for corporate marketing, Jung-hye was much more sensible than Sung-ha and wouldn’t do such a thing without Gyo-ha or Hwi-kyung’s consent.

“Everyone thinks I like you romantically, so there’s no need to worry so much.”

“That’s what I’m most worried about.”

Am I going to get slapped with kimchi for seducing their son? In Hwi-kyung’s mind, several morning dramas he had watched with his grandmother played quickly. He felt like he had already heard the line, “Our family doesn’t need a male daughter-in-law!” somewhere.

“What can they do if I like you?”

But Gyo-ha acted as if this family gathering was no big deal, telling Hwi-kyung to ignore Sung-ha’s antics as he adjusted Hwi-kyung’s clothes.

Hwi-kyung found Gyo-ha’s confidence and trust in his family strange. How can he be so fearless? Gyo-ha, like someone who had lived well, acted without hesitation in everything. He was completely different from Hwi-kyung, who constantly thought about even the smallest statement before speaking.

It was both annoying and enviable. Hwi-kyung had mixed feelings when he looked at Gyo-ha. Every time he realized that Gyo-ha was a good person, he felt personal affection for him while also feeling a sense of alienation because Gyo-ha’s entire life was so different from his own.

Even if he died and woke up a few more times, Jung Hwi-kyung probably couldn’t reach nirvana. Compared to Gyo-ha, who helped Hwi-kyung in every way just because of graduate school, Hwi-kyung found it difficult to shake off the base emotions that suddenly arose.

“Gyo-ha-ssi, you know.”

“Yes? Yes.”

“I think you’re a bit annoying.”

But no matter how he thought about it, Jung Hwi-kyung was more normal than Lee Gyo-ha. In 21st century modern society, someone who indiscriminately shows kindness to others is likely to get stabbed in the back or have their savings cleaned out.

In fact, if we were to be precise, Hwi-kyung was slightly less than normal. Hadn’t he been cursed to cycle through black companies just for being a bit kind to some grandmother? In Hwi-kyung’s mind, Gyo-ha must also be suffering like this because he thoughtlessly helped someone.

“Don’t like people so easily. Don’t treat others too well carelessly.”

“…”

“You said you went to graduate school more than ten times because of me. It’s strange that you forgive so easily.”

It wasn’t an appropriate conversation to have before a family gathering, but at that moment, Hwi-kyung couldn’t bear not saying these words.

“Even if it wasn’t me, you would have been kind to anyone, right?”

There are words you always regret after saying them. The problem was that words are liquid in nature, and once spilled, they can’t be taken back.

Hwi-kyung immediately regretted his words, but he couldn’t undo them. Gyo-ha, not fully understanding Hwi-kyung’s words, just blinked with a surprised face. Then he asked:

“Hwi-kyung-ssi.”

“…”

“Has ‘annoying’ become equivalent to ‘like’ in Korean without me knowing?”

Lee Gyo-ha was truly asking for trouble. Hwi-kyung, no longer considering Gyo-ha his superior, punched him in the chest. Even after being hit in the chest, Gyo-ha laughed brightly, saying “I like you too, Hwi-kyung-ssi.” Hwi-kyung really started to dislike Gyo-ha.