Miss, It’s Just a Cold

Chapter 10: The Ballroom

“Emily, I’ve been watching you for a while now. Ernst came to find you, but you just sent him away and stayed here, all alone, entertaining yourself in this corner.”

“Haha, you’ve been watching closely, I see.”

“Perhaps it’s time to stop being so defiant, don’t you think?”

Mother approached me slowly, pushing me into a secluded corner out of sight of the ballroom crowd.

Then, she clenched her fist and struck my stomach with all her strength.

If I had eaten, it would have been disastrous, but thankfully, my stomach was empty.

Though it didn’t seem like she hit me that hard, my whole body felt numb, a stark reminder of how fragile I was.

“Ugh… Mother.”

“What is it, Emily?”

I wiped the spit that had trickled from my mouth. Or was it stomach acid? I couldn’t tell.

“Should I scream and cry for you to stop, right here, in this corner?

After all, my body is already covered in bruises.”

“I don’t understand why you, who used to be so obedient, have suddenly changed like this.”

“Perhaps it’s because the rebellious phase I never had as a child has finally arrived.”

Teenagers acting out were often dismissed as being possessed by a demon here.

Given how poorly I’d grown up, maybe even the “demon” had taken its time to show up.

“If that’s the case, we’ll have to find you a man who can love you and settle you down.”

“Just don’t assume that man will be Ernst.

He’s been my friend for years and values our friendship. There isn’t even a hint of romantic interest in his feelings for me.”

Her ambitions were far too lofty.

Our household, clinging to its bloodline but struggling to make ends meet, was leagues apart from Ernst’s, where too much money was the problem.

“As a daughter, you should fulfill your mother’s wishes when you know what they are.”

“Is that so?”

“Of course. After all, I bore you and raised you in such a noble household—shouldn’t that count for something?”

Mother took a step back, standing beside me, and opened her fan, covering her mouth.

Her cheeks twitched slightly. Was she gritting her teeth behind the fan? It seemed likely.

Sure, Ernst was a catch.

I didn’t understand why she coveted someone who wasn’t hers to claim in the first place.

“I remember you once speaking about the virtues of a lady.

You said a lady should act with decorum, know her place, and live within her means.

That was the day I mentioned wanting to go to school like Ellie, wasn’t it?”

“But you were already grown by then.”

“Even so, I think I was far brighter then than Ellie is now.”

“An elder sister should sacrifice for her younger siblings.”

“And parents should do the same for their children.”

For a moment, Mother said nothing, her lips pressed together in silence.

“Emily, I only ever wanted you to marry into a wealthy, noble family and be happy.”

She closed her fan, her expression now calm, her emotions seemingly subdued.

“But you know our family’s situation. It may be humiliating, but we’ll likely have to send you off to a commoner.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. If you’re to be called a lady, marriage is a necessity, wouldn’t you agree?”

Mother spoke in her usual gentle, cordial tone.

“But before that, I think you’ll need some additional training.

Look around—no one is asking you to dance.

What must they think of you to ignore you so completely?”

“…Haha… ugh.”

As the music began again and people started dancing, Mother cornered me against the wall and began choking me.

A sharp sting at my neck made me wonder if I had coughed up blood or if her nails had scratched my skin.

“So, Emily, don’t behave so rebelliously toward your mother.

All children are blonde. All children have blue eyes.

But you…

Because you were born like this, I’ve endured so much.”

“Ugh… hhgg…”

I reached out to grab her arms, but I had no strength.

Even though we were both women, Mother was much larger and far healthier than I was.

Or was I just too frail?

Mother pinned me against the wall and lifted me off my feet.

My breathing became more labored with every passing moment.

In my struggle, I caught a glimpse of my wrist.

I was supposed to be a noble, someone from a distinguished family.

Wherever I went, I was called “Miss.”

Yet my wrist was just as thin and malnourished as that of a street urchin.

“I’ve always wanted to gouge out those red eyes of yours. I’ve wanted to burn all that hair away. Because of you, I had to endure such treatment from my beloved husband.”

If that’s how you felt, you shouldn’t have given birth to me in the first place.

My lips twitched, but no words came out. With her hands squeezing my throat, speaking was impossible.

“Of course, once he realized you were truly his child, my husband did apologize to me.

Though how he figured it out, I’ll never know.”

Why is this world the way it is?

“In any case, enjoy the ball tonight, my dear daughter.”

“Agh… hhgg…”

Mother released me and walked away.

She was likely going to check on Ellie, her mood soured after dealing with me.

As I watched her leave, I felt no anger or hatred—only sorrow and a deep sense of misery.

I, Emily, still think of that woman as my mother—still consider her my family.

Even Daniel, that boy, I still think of as my brother.

By now, I should despise them with every fiber of my being, but I don’t.

The music hadn’t stopped.

No one was looking my way, no one was paying attention to me.

The clumsy waltz drifted through the air.

It felt vile.

Because I knew what real music sounded like.

The worst thing that ever happened to Emily wasn’t being born into this household.

It wasn’t the awful siblings who treated her like dirt, or being born an albino, or having that cursed woman as her mother.

No, the worst thing was that I had become Emily.

If it weren’t for me, she might have been able to believe she was loved.

If it weren’t for me, she might have thought her siblings adored her.

If it weren’t for me, she might have believed she had a caring father and a strict but doting mother.

Knowing what is whole and true is a terrible thing.

I know how clumsy and miserable this waltz is.

But to the people here, this waltz is the latest in modern music.

Sophisticated, refined, and a masterpiece of artistic expression.

Only I was left here, catching my breath.

Collapsed on the floor, I inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly.

“Hic.”

Then, for no particular reason, I cried.

No matter how much I tried to stop, the tears wouldn’t stop flowing.

The clumsy music eventually ended.

Throughout, I didn’t make a sound. I just wiped away the tears running down my face.

It had been a while since I cried, but this silent crying was familiar.

It was a habit from my childhood, the fruit of my efforts to avoid another beating.

I spent a long time standing in the corner, watching the ball unfold.

Men and women laughing and chatting happily.

Behind them, a group of rather plain-looking women whispering gossip.

I turned away—I had no interest in looking at unattractive things.

A young gentleman and lady, with their parents standing proudly behind them, practicing a dance together, holding hands.

It was a heartwarming sight, but I turned away to suppress the bitter jealousy rising in my chest.

Nearby, a harmonious couple wandered by the food tables, feeding each other pieces of fruit.

Stories of love weren’t my thing.

It was that kind of nonsense that brought me to this wretched place.

So, I turned my gaze elsewhere.

And then I saw Ernst, looking flustered and uneasy.

“Hey, why are you crying?”

“And why are you here?”

When he reached for a handkerchief to wipe my tears, I swatted his hand away.

I had no interest in being comforted by a man.

In fact, I didn’t want to marry anyone.

There was a time—before I ended up here—when being around someone I liked would make my heart flutter. But now, I felt nothing.

“Ernst. Go hold hands with some pretty young lady, dance a few rounds, have a pleasant chat, snack on something at the food table, and then dance again. That’s what you should be doing.”

“…What’s this all about?”

“Ariana. Go play with her instead.

I’ll be fine here.”

I tried to push Ernst away, but instead of moving, he grabbed my wrist.

“…That hurts.”

“There are marks on your neck. Who…!”

I cut him off with a mocking laugh.

Now I’d ruined his mood.

There’s nothing more delightful than spending the day with a lovely young lady, returning home with a heart full of joy, and falling asleep with pleasant dreams.

But I’d ruined it. Guilt crept into my chest.

“If I told you I was crying because I was sad and alone, would you believe me?”

“Stop talking nonsense.”

“You don’t need to know.”

“Just tell me who did this. If it’s a man, I’ll hunt him down and destroy him. Or, if you don’t want that, I’ll make sure he never comes near you again.”

Unfortunately, it wasn’t a man.

“I’ll handle it. Just go back and dance.”

“You expect me to leave after seeing this?”

“Yes.”

I tried to shake his grip off, but he wouldn’t let go.

Before I could speak again, Ernst grabbed me and began dragging me somewhere.

TL Note: Rate us on NOVEL UPDATES