Marvel's FBI?

Here's a quick milestone I'd like to set for this week: you'll be getting three extra chapters at 500 PS and five extra chapters at 1000 PS. This is different from the normal PS goal: 200 PS = 1 extra chapter. So, you can get as many chapters as you want this week xD.

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In his cell, Loki muttered those words and instantly stunned the entire X-Men crew.

"Did you hear that? He just said he's a god."

"I heard him, Emma. No need to freak out. I've lived long enough to see more than a few nutjobs claim to be gods."

"Logan, just because you've been alive forever doesn't make you special, alright?"

As the conversation spiraled into complete nonsense, even Loki rolled his eyes from inside the cell.

Earthlings… so damn noisy.

Meanwhile, Dante rubbed his eyes and took another good look at the guy inside the cage.

No mistaking it now. That really was Loki.

Back when he'd searched the FBI database for major multiverse events, he'd already seen Loki's name pop up. The invasion had happened in this timeline too—but this time, the invasion target had been Metropolis. And it had ended real quick, thanks to the Kansas Strongman stepping in and deleting the entire event from history. No "Battle of New York," just an early shutdown.

After that, Loki vanished off the face of the earth. Not even the Bureau had a trace of him.

He had spotted Loki's scepter in a research lab once… but he never imagined the guy himself would be locked in the basement of some HYDRA facility.

How to describe this?

Unexpected bonus?

Dante stepped forward and tapped on the glass of the cell.

"First of all, we don't worship alien gods here," he said. "Second of all, never heard of some low-tier god getting caught by a bunch of pyramid scheme weirdos."

"Ahem, child… my power lies in that scepter. Just release me and let me get it back, and I can bestow the entire world upon you."

"Can Asgardians stop exaggerating everything? Do you still think Earth is stuck in the Stone Age?"

"You could've said sooner that you knew I was Asgardian. Do you think I'm proud of making up that kind of sales pitch?" Loki dropped the act the moment his identity was exposed. "But to be fair, Earth's still barely a step above prehistoric by Asgard's standards."

Dante looked at the awkward god behind glass, and signaled for Ada Wong to check for the mechanism that opened the cell.

But before releasing Loki, there were still some questions he wanted answered.

"Alright, now that we've introduced ourselves, I've got a few questions. Answer them well, and I might consider letting you out."

"And if I don't answer? You gonna kill me? I wouldn't recommend that. The moment you do, Earth will be staring down an Asgardian invasion."

He wasn't bluffing.

Even though Loki wasn't Odin's biological son, Odin treated him like his own. To an almost ridiculous degree.

The guy was the son of Laufey—Odin's sworn enemy and king of the Frost Giants. But Odin still raised Loki as a prince and even sealed away his Frost Giant traits so he'd look just like any other Asgardian.

Sure, the seal sometimes failed when he came into contact with similar energy, but all that really meant was that he occasionally turned blue.

The point was, Odin had used Heavenly Father-tier power to basically rewrite Loki's DNA.

"Come on now, my dear God of Mischief Loki Odinson. I'm not here to kill you," Dante said, rubbing his hands together like a greasy car salesman. "Here's what I'm thinking. I'll represent the Federal Bureau of Investigation and offer you an employment contract for one hundred—no, make that one hundred and fifty years. You'd be hired as a Senior Agent."

"Employment? You've got to be kidding me."

Loki sounded incredulous, but his body language told a different story.

He was tempted.

No question about it—Loki was clever, manipulative, dangerous... but not patient.

At this point, even being sent back to Asgard to get spanked by Odin was better than staying locked up in this blank white cube.

"Cell life or partial freedom. Pick one."

Dante didn't bother arguing anymore. He just turned and motioned for the X-Men to prep for departure.

"Alright, alright! One-fifty it is! I'll sign the damn contract!"

"Too late. You hesitated, so the price went up. It's 200 years now."

"A conniving scum like you would be strung up from a tower in Asgard and sun-dried into jerky… Fine! Two hundred! I'll sign!"

Loki was definitely gritting his teeth but he also looked weirdly satisfied.

I mean, what's a contract on Midgard anyway? Once he got bored, he'd just waltz back to Asgard. What was the Bureau gonna do—chase him across realms with a clipboard?

"See? I agreed! Now open this stupid cell already! Your lady agent already found the switch! Hurry up and open this boring, sturdy thing!"

Dante didn't move.

He just waited.

"You're not opening it yet?" Ada asked.

Dante shook his head.

She pulled her hand away from the switch.

No one had any idea what he was thinking now.

But the scheming expression from earlier—the one he used to rope Loki in—was gone. His face had turned serious.

The others took the hint and slowly drifted away, gathering around Magneto, who was still bound by the Green Will energy.

They didn't have anything to do right now anyway… so why not use the chance to roast Magneto while they could?

Especially Harley who walked up and asked Dante to drop the barrier for a sec.

Then she pulled out a lipstick and drew a massive, clown-style red grin on the tape stuck over Magneto's mouth.

Pfft…

"Magneto, Magneto~ looks like karma finally caught up with you!"

A round of low chuckles broke out among the X-Men.

White Queen and Mystique—who'd once been on Team Brotherhood themselves—didn't even pretend to hold back. They snatched the lipstick and went in for a second layer of "art."

Ada Wong watched all this unfold and could only sigh.

Ever since Dante joined the Bureau, their vibe had gotten… deeply unprofessional.

She couldn't even be mad anymore—she just quietly prayed for Magneto's heart health.

First his own daughter denounced him.

Then this.

Now even his own ex-teammates were clowning him in front of a crowd.

Even just imagining it was enough to make her blood pressure spike.

Fortunately, the chaos didn't last long.

Dante suddenly looked toward the empty air outside the cell and muttered softly.

"He's here."

The moment those words dropped, a glowing green portal snapped open in the air.

A figure in a green cloak and Iron Man-style armor stepped out of it.

"I've been expecting you… 'Doctor Doom.' Victor Von Doom."

(To be continued.)

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