Martial Arts Ain’t That Big of a Deal

Chapter 23



“Ugggh…!!”

_Bam! Bam!_ The blanket seemed like it was about to tear apart at any moment.

“Whoa there, Kim Chun-bong. Go easy now, easy.”

“Kyahhhhh…!!!”

_Whoosh whoosh whoosh!_ The kicks rained down like a machine gun, ultimately blowing the blanket into pieces.

I nodded at Chun-bong as she flailed around.

“Hang in there, little lady. This bout of madness will pass soon.”

“Shut it, you jerk…!”

In an instant, Kim Chun-bong leaped up and crashed into my abdomen like a missile.

“Ugh…!”

“If it weren’t for you, nobody would know about that incident…!”

“Murder is off the table, you little rascal!”

“Die, Seo-jun…!”

_Tap tap tap!_ Her playful punches landed on my chest with flair. Not painful at all.

“A-a-a-a────.”

My voice trailed off like I was in front of a fan. Chun-bong, proud of her lung capacity, gasped and flopped over on top of me, completely spent.

“Ugggh…”

She was embarrassed to the extreme. What a weird age to be bashful about trivial things.

“Hey, our Chun-bong. Shall we go out for a drink?”

“…Where to?”

“The Red-light District?”

“Are you out of your mind….”

Even if I’m her brother, would that face not hurt my feelings?

With a smirk, I got up, looping Chun-bong under my arm.

“Let’s get something to eat first. We can hit the Red-light District when the sun sets.”

“No, not the Red-light District…”

I knew she’d complain but still follow me.

I ambled along, casually leading the way.

*

The Black Tiger Sect was loaded.

Thanks to the vault I raided, I was now no slouch either.

I could have lavish meals at the inn every single day without a care in the world.

“Come on, Teacher Chun-bong. Let’s have a drink.”

“Mmm. The aroma is quite nice.”

“To pick up the fragrance from water! Such a master!”

“…Let’s cut it out. You sound ridiculous.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

We ordered a spread of mouthwatering dishes—Sannibai-ryuk, Tangchori-jok, Jyungyang-ryuk, and Kyu-hwa-gye. All of it was meat-based.

One more bottle of alcohol and we’d truly be in heaven.

“Just order already, right?” Obviously not, though.

Our Chun-bong is but a baby. I need to protect her.

As I ate, I scanned the surroundings.

“What are you doing?”

Chun-bong was also busy munching, her cheeks bulging as she moved her jaw. I leaned in to her ear as she drew closer to listen.

“We’ve got to be careful in inns. One of the Martial Arts World’s three great mysteries takes place in inns.”

“What nonsense are you spouting?”

“Remember the last time? We ran into those guys from Cheong-ha-mun at an inn.”

“Yeah, that was because you kicked the fabric shop owner’s ass.”

“Look, it’s still true!”

In martial arts novels, about half of the events occur in inns.

In the Central Plains alone, there must be hundreds of inns that vanish daily, right?

I mean, when martial artists go on rampages, the inns have no choice but to close up shop. Better that than getting stabbed, after all.

Unless the innkeeper happens to be a demon master, I seriously doubt they would remain unbothered.

“Mmm, I’m full.”

After finishing her meal, Chun-bong patted her round belly.

Up until now, I had been on high alert, but I scratched my head.

“This feels oddly quiet.”

“Stop messing around.”

“Meow.”

“Yikes…”

I paid the bill while Chun-bong was startled by my playful antics.

Stepping out of the inn, the sun was blazing in the sky. Surely the brothel wouldn’t be open during the day, right?

“Hey, Kim Chun-bong.”

“What?”

“Are you, like, capable of letting loose or what?”

“I don’t know. I spent my childhood training, and by the time I grew up, I lost my home and family.”

“What the….”

Come on now. What am I supposed to do with that kind of revelation? I couldn’t help but scratch my chin, then suddenly swept Chun-bong up onto my back.

“Whoa…!”

“Come on, Kim Chun-bong…!”

Let’s have some fun today until we drop!

*

I learned one thing today.

The Martial Arts World really has nothing going on.

I finally understood why martial artists are so obsessed with mastering their skills; in a world like this, there isn’t much else to do.

“Ugh…, I feel sick.”

Eventually, with nothing else to do, I ended up stuffing my face with anything within reach.

I even ate so much Bing Tang Huo, Chun-bong’s favorite, that my mouth felt sore.

“Hehe…”

But Chun-bong seemed to be having a blast, beaming with joy. So cute. But that’s beside the point.

‘How aggravating.’

Thanks to her, I scarfed down at least five Bing Tang Huo myself.

Suddenly, I grabbed Chun-bong’s waist and lifted her high above my head like I’d seen in The Lion King.

“Hey, everyone…! Take a look at our Chun-bong!”

“W-what the heck…! You madman! Put me down!?”

“The cutest in the Central Plains! Our Chun-bong!”

“Y-you punk…! Stop it right now…!”

People passing by burst out laughing. Chun-bong’s face turned a deep red, looking as if it might burst if pinched.

“Whew, I feel refreshed now.”

“You jerk!”

Once I set her down, little fists started flying toward me.

“Ahhh…!”

That hurt. This wasn’t the usual playful punching; it was like each hit made a _pow_ sound.

Chun-bong threw punches until she tired herself out, puffing away as she stomped ahead. Her little footsteps looked oddly determined.

‘Is she starting to calm down?’

She definitely looked a bit more composed now. I smiled as I ran up behind her and grabbed her head playfully.

“Hey, Kim Chun-bong. Let’s go together.”

“Scram!”

“Aw.”

“Ow…!”

“Akka.”

“I bet it’s Murasaki, isn’t it? Cut it out!”

“Did I get figured out…! Such a master!”

“Shut it.”

Anyway, I had a blast too.

*

As dusk fell, I headed toward the Red-light District.

“Are you not getting tired of this?”

“Uh-huh. It’s delicious.”

Next to me was Chun-bong, who stubbornly consumed yet another Bing Tang Huo, her sugar levels off the charts.

“Hmm.”

The brothels lined the streets.

There were grand establishments like Red Moon Pavilion, and then those that were barely held together; they looked more like rundown shacks.

Most of them fell into the latter category. That’s just how back alleys are.

“What should we do?”

“What about?”

“I’ve decided.”

“What are you planning to do? Speak up!”

With a grin, I flung open the doors of a brothel on the edge of the Red-light District.

“Hey, friends!”

All eyes were on us.

Courtesans, customers, and those thuggish figures clad in black.

A young boy approached nervously, skidding to a halt.

“Are you a guest?”

“Not really.”

“Uh… excuse me?”

That response clearly caught him off-guard.

I patted the boy on the shoulder and approached one of the thugs nearby.

“Hey there!”

“…Killer. What’s going on here?”

“Where’s your leader?”

“You think I’d tell?!”

“Oh, fair point.”

I scratched my chin, realizing they wouldn’t willingly spill the beans.

After pondering a bit, I stomped my foot forcefully against the ground.

_Clunk—!_

_Crack!_ The area where my foot made contact froze instantly.

The thug’s expression stiffened.

“Are you looking for a fight?”

“What fight? The sun has already set; now it’s time for the moon to rise.”

Chun-bong gasped from behind.

“Seriously, this is so boring.”

“Ugh.”

Anyway, that wasn’t the main thing on my mind.

“So, where’s your leader?”

“…I won’t show you.”

“But you will, won’t you?”

*

I met with one of the black thugs and issued my ultimatum.

I’d need a handful of courtesans for about a week, so I asked for their cooperation.

Naturally, there was some resistance.

“You want to take our courtesans? Who gave you the right?!”

“That would be… a martial arts master’s prerogative?”

“Even if you are who you say, can you really survive turning all the black thugs against you?”

“Of course!”

I nonchalantly tossed a glance at a tree next to me, shaking my head in mock disapproval.

The thug snickered.

“Do you think your power is endless?”

Silent as a statue, I unleashed another powerful stomp.

_Kwaaaam──────────!!!_

The thug, now coated in splinters from the tree, nodded vigorously.

“Y-yes! Take them all you want!”

As the thug deeply bowed, I strolled away, speaking to myself.

“What should I name this attack? Umyang-tanji? Umyangji? Hmmm… No, how about Hongwon-ilwolji?”

“That sounds lame.”

“Well then, how about Hwangryongsinji? No, that feels off. Hwangryongsin-tan?”

“…That actually sounds decent.”

Oh, Chun-bong, your intentions are so transparent!

I was cracking up just thinking of keeping the name Hwangryongsin-tan, when Chun-bong, perhaps feeling guilty, spoke up.

“…Actually, on second thought, I think Hongwon-ilwolji is better.”

“Really now?”

“Names of martial arts need to be intuitive. They could influence your state of mind to some extent.”

“Aww, cute little rascal!”

“W-what now?”

And that was how it happened.

*

Deep in thought, rather than hitting up another brothel, I made my way to Hongwollu.

After visiting one place, I realized that barging into every brothel and trying to persuade people would just turn into too much hassle.

“So just for the day after tomorrow, right? You can gather the courtesans who used to belong to the Black Tiger Sect and we’ll round them up then.”

The host of the brothel, Mae-wol, smiled brightly and nodded.

“Of course. By the way, sir, you don’t need to be so formal with me. Please feel free to speak comfortably like last time.”

“Not interested.”

“Fufufu, understood.”

I wasn’t sure what she meant by that, but she nodded lightly, and I felt a sharp glare from beside me.

“What’s up with you, Chun-bong?”

“Last time? You visited here yesterday, didn’t you?”

“Oops.”

I quickly covered my mouth. Just then, Mae-wol, who had been listening in, defended me.

“It’s great if a man is in good health. Too much confinement only makes one want to break loose and fly away.”

“Stay out of this!”

Chun-bong growled.

Why on earth is she fuming?

“Our Chun-bong here doesn’t ask anyone for help.”

“Yes, sir. That aside, how’s your night looking?”

Mae-wol confidently threw her advances my way. I stepped back and shook my head.

“Uh, no thanks. I might catch a disease, so…”

“Hmm, I see…”

Mae-wol’s eyes twitched slightly, as if she found it amusing.

“Well, see ya!”

I quickly scooped up Chun-bong and rushed out of Hongwollu, making a hasty retreat.

“Phew, the popularity is unreal.”

“…You psycho.”

Chun-bong’s gaze felt awfully strange, as if she were looking at a real-life madman.

“No! I defended you, why the fuss?”

“Ugh, whatever.”

Still, Chun-bong’s face, shaking her head, didn’t seem too displeased.

“Oh, right. By the way, do you know of a place called Hawmun?”



Tip: You can use left, right, A and D keyboard keys to browse between chapters.