Macho Man Doesn't want a Slice-of-Life

"How is that cheap? I just summarized it in the most concise and clear way possible."

Rinji looked at Kaguya with a confused expression—like he was silently asking, What's wrong with this woman? That look infuriated Kaguya even more.

"How was that a summary?! You butchered a beautiful story!"

"Really? Then I'll retell it another way, this time capturing the core."

"Huh?"

Rinji cleared his throat.

"Once, there was a spy from the moon who came to Earth. She was adopted by a kind-hearted farmer and named Kaguya. Over time, she assimilated into Earth's culture. People thought she was one of them. But as she grew older, her devious spy plan began to unfold."

As Rinji spoke, Kaguya's expression grew darker and darker.

After all, he was literally using her name.

"Kaguya used her beauty to seduce wave after wave of men. She managed to turn five high-ranking nobles into her pawns and ordered them to collect earthly treasures. But when they all failed, she deemed them worthless..."

"Hey hey hey!! This isn't The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter anymore!!"

But Rinji completely ignored her outburst and kept going.

"Eventually, her cover was blown. The moon realized she'd collected enough intel and that continuing the mission would be too risky. So they sent agents to bring her back. The end."

"The whole story's a mess now!!"

"Very thought-provoking and deep."

"It's not deep at all coming from you."

Kaguya couldn't take Rinji's nonsense anymore. Not only had he twisted the tale, he kept using her name to tell a story about a manipulative spy.

It felt like a roundabout way of insulting her.

"Isn't it thought-provoking though?" Rinji said. "Look at Kaguya in the story—she's just like those femme fatale spies who use their beauty to extract secrets. Doesn't it remind you of the KGB's Swallow agents?"

"..."

"And the moon sending people to retrieve her—that's just like how weaker countries have no real diplomacy. If they say hand someone over, you have no choice."

"..."

"You've got to admit, whoever wrote this in the Nara period was a genius. A timeless tale reflecting 21st-century geopolitics—truly masterful."

He even gave a thumbs up to the ancient author.

"THAT'S JUST WAY TOO MUCH OVERINTERPRETATION!!"

Kaguya felt like she couldn't deal with Rinji anymore.

"Then, Rinji, explain this: why did Princess Kaguya leave the elixir of immortality for the man she loved?"

"..."

"Can't answer, can you?"

"Maybe... Kaguya was a double agent? A spy playing both sides?"

"Stop twisting the story! And stop using my name! You're making it sound like I'm that double-crossing spy!!"

While the two were arguing, Shirogane—who had been quietly watching the moon—suddenly spoke.

"Come to think of it, it is strange that Kaguya left behind the elixir. Judging from how she treated the five suitors, she never really seemed like the sentimental type."

He paused, then continued.

"Maybe she was trying to leave a message. Telling the man, 'You must come find me.'"

"..."

Kaguya turned to look at Shirogane, who was just inches away.

"Even if it takes more than a lifetime, even if the distance spans light-years, she left the elixir as a promise: 'I'll be waiting for you.'"

Shirogane's eyes stayed fixed on the sky, unaware of Kaguya's stunned expression.

"But that man didn't understand the message," he murmured. "If it were me, I would never have let Kaguya go."

"!!?"

Kaguya's face turned bright red.

Even though he was talking about the story of Princess Kaguya, to her, it felt like he was talking about her. After all, they shared the same name.

"I would've flown to the moon and brought her back, even if it took a hundred or a thousand years."

"Please stop..."

Listening to Shirogane's words that sounded dangerously like a love confession, Kaguya buried her face in her hands in embarrassment.

"If it were our story, I'd understand what you meant. I'd bring you back—and I'd never let go."

"STOP TALKING!!"

Kaguya suddenly stood up and shouted, her face glowing red.

"Huh?"

Before Shirogane could react, she cried out, "Aren't you even embarrassed?! I can't take this anymore!"

And with that, she ran off, face still buried in her hands.

"..."

Shirogane was left sitting there, completely unsure of what he had done wrong.

Rinji walked over and sat beside him.

"President, it seems you have your own interpretation of The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter."

"Let's call it an immature understanding." Shirogane kept his gaze on the moon. "I just think it's too sad that she waited forever but he never came for her."

"President, have you ever thought of it this way?"

"Hm?"

"Kaguya gave the immortality elixir to the emperor, right?" Rinji said with a grin. "Now imagine if the emperor had a star-destroying cannon back then—would the moon people still have dared to take her?"

"Huh? Well… probably not."

"Instead of taking the elixir and waiting around forever, it's better to gain power. Power strong enough that no one would dare take her from you."

Rinji stood up and patted Shirogane on the shoulder.

"When that power finds its way to you, don't reject it. Make good use of it. Because that… is the only way to stop the moon from taking Kaguya away."

After saying that, Rinji walked back to the others.

All Shirogane could see was his back.

That seemingly frail, yet strangely reassuring figure.

"A star-destroying cannon to deter the moon, huh..."

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