40. Feelings of Hatred
CHAPTER 40: FEELINGS OF HATRED
“So if you can travel to the spirit world than why not just teach me to do it now?” Aang questioned a thought he had since he met Zuko back on Kyoshi.
“I can’t teach you some thing I don't know kid,” Zuko immediately answered. “About thrice I have travelled to the spirit world now but all three times were so different I cannot find any common element to how I did it. Reading about spirituality and all that annoying staff I found a scroll about a way even a normal man can travel to the spirit world without the enlightenment. On the winter solstice, the line separating the spirit world and the physical world is at its weakest. This provides us with the easiest and fastest way. Not only that but the shrine of Avatar Roku has a special property that can actually make it that I can join you.”
Everyone including Zuko himself were confused by what he was saying. He was trying not to mention anything that might make Aang and Katara think of how he knew such things. He also wanted them to trust him a bit more. However, what he said wasn’t entirely falls. He could not teach Aang because he himself didn't know how he did it. Secondly he only way he knew it were possible for this immature Aang was with the help of the solstice which did factually blur the line. Thirdly it was because Avatar Roku somehow knew of the future and had more spiritual knowledge than Kyoshi or Kuruk. Although he could have stayed on Kyoshi and used her shrine to contact her, she wasn't very spiritual. Kuruk had a shrine but it was on the other side of the planet. Avatar Roku was the logical conclusion in that he warned Aang of the comet and had more spiritual Knowledge than what he had seen of Kyoshi.
“So anyway what you’re telling me is we need the solstice and we need Avatar Roku,” Aang somehow surmised the situation.
“Yes!” Zuko answered with a strong and unwavering voice.
“So I will go with you Zuko,” Aang added after looking back at Katara and her still confused look. “Any wrong move. I will make you regret the day you met me!”
Zuko held back the urge to laugh as the boy walked up to him and confronted him face to face. Their faces separated by just a few inches.
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Zuko hesitated at the mouth of the cave, watching Katara's slender form disappear into the dense forest. His heart raced with a mixture of excitement and trepidation as he made a split-second decision to follow her, his footsteps careful and silent against the forest floor.
The early morning sunlight filtered through the canopy, casting dappled shadows on the ground as Zuko trailed behind Katara, his thoughts swirling with uncertainty. He had known her for years, their paths crossing intermittently even in the original series. But lately, something had shifted between them, a tension that Zuko couldn't quite decipher.
"Katara, wait up!" Zuko called out, quickening his pace to catch up to her. She glanced back at him, her expression guarded, but she didn't stop walking.
"What do you want, Zuko?" Katara asked, her tone cool and distant.
Zuko swallowed hard, steeling himself for what he was about to say. "I... I wanted to talk to you. Alone."
Katara stopped abruptly, turning to face him with a furrowed brow. "About what?"
Zuko took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts before speaking. She knew exactly what had transpired between he two of them. Yet she seemed unwilling to think about the kiss they shared. "About us. About... everything."
Katara's eyes narrowed slightly, suspicion flickering in their depths. "What do you mean, 'everything'?"
Zuko hesitated, unsure of how to articulate the jumble of emotions churning inside him. Of course he liked her but her acting oblivious was getting him annoyed. "I mean... I've always admired you, Katara. You're so... strong, and independent. I want to be with you. Ever since I saw you back in your village at the South Pole."
Katara's expression softened slightly, a hint of confusion clouding her features. "Zuko, what are you saying?"
Zuko took a step closer to her, his heart pounding in his chest. "I'm saying... I want you to be my woman, Katara. I want us to be together."
Katara's eyes widened in surprise, her mouth opening and closing as she searched for words. "Zuko, I... I don't know what to say."
Zuko's heart sank at her hesitation, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air between them. "I know my family... I know what we've done, what I have done. But trust me when I say I am not like them, Katara. I want to be better. For you." They had this conversation before, on Kyoshi. But things had changed so much since.
Katara's gaze softened, a flicker of sympathy in her eyes. "Zuko, it's not that simple. You can't just... ignore everything that's happened."
Zuko's jaw clenched, frustration bubbling up inside him. "But I'm trying, Katara. I'm trying to prove myself, to be someone worthy of you."
Katara's expression softened, her gaze meeting his with a mix of sadness and uncertainty. "Zuko, I... I need time. Time to figure things out, to understand how I feel."
Zuko's heart sank at her words, the sting of rejection cutting deep. But he nodded slowly, a sense of determination burning in his chest. "I understand. I'll give you all the time you need, Katara."
They stood in silence for a moment, the weight of their conversation hanging heavy in the air. Then, with a heavy sigh, Katara turned and continued walking.
Zuko simply stood there and watched as she continued. As she walked deeper into the forest, Zuko couldn't shake the feeling of uncertainty gnawing at him. But he knew one thing for certain: he would do whatever it took to prove himself to Katara, to show her that he was worthy of her love. Even if it meant facing the darkest parts of himself and his past.
Alone he stood but not quite, a shadowy figure came into his view as Katara disappeared into the trees.
“You cannot change who are just because of some girl,” Paul reminded as he appeared out of nothing. “Remember that she was destined to be with ‘him’ and not you.”
“I know more about that than you,” Zuko spoke with an annoyed tone. “There was a time when I think that things could have changed entirely not only for Zuko but the entire world. If only he wasn’t sweet talked by Azula.”
“That’s what I met by destiny.” Paul disagreed. “I remember exactly what you mean at the end of the second season. It was his destiny for him to betray her.”
Zuko didn't speak but instead glared at the apparition. Even though he couldn't be touched, Paul felt a wave of fear overwhelm him. It was like being back on earth. He was never comfortable enough around Victor when he got like that.
“Things have changed in this world Paul!” Zuko stated. “My presence here has changed things in more ways than we couldn't possibly imagine.”
“Does the changes you have brought include the destiny of some characters?” Paul asked even though he was shaking from fear. “How do you think your presence has affected what will happen to Korra? Will she even be the Avatar? I remember you saying you liked her almost as much as you liked Azula.”
“Don't be stupid Paul!” Zuko said. “Of course I have not forgotten about her. There is not much I can do about Korra, but there is some thing I can do about Azula. Some thing I can do about Katara. Azula will be my woman. Katara will be my woman. I have already made up my mind about that. Not even that monkey fool Vumala will stand in my way of capturing them both.”
“I certainly hope so,” Paul said as they followed Katata back to the river.
A distance away another shadowy figure watched the young Prince and his encounter with the slim Katara. This was the young Avatar watching from afar. A vicious scowl came across his face. An hunger of which he knew nothing of came welling up inside of him. A burning hatred for which he knew little of fired in his heart. He had little knowledge of such a feeling but there was one thing he knew for certain, he hated Zuko.
In his mind he tried to convince himself that it was because of the fate of the world and his duty as the Avatar but in his heart he knew it was definitely because of Katara. He did not like feeling that way. Gyatso would be ashamed if he saw him now. The great monk, friend of two Avatars, actually expected better from him but also understood his own humanity. As he stood on the thick tree brunch he recalled the kindness the monk showed him. Aang sat down in the lotus position and closed his eyes to meditate. He had an ingling that Zuko was up to something. It was his main reason for not running away even this free. He had to stick close to Zuko to get to know his plans. Not because of some spirit but because of the guilt he felt for abandoning the world.
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