NOVEL WEB Chapter 56: Don't Drag Me
The Celestial Hound quickly pointed at an ant on the ground and said, "I'm talking about that one! I've found him disagreeable for a long time, with two antennae sticking out of his head, pretending to have hair, isn't that deceiving people? That's simply too much, an outrage to both gods and men, don't you think?"
After finishing, he looked up, just in time to see Tang Sanzang ripping a bunch of hair from a horse's tail and sticking it onto his head...
A gust of wind blew, and that tuft of hair separated into two... Read new chapters at empire
He glanced from the ant on the ground to the Tang Sanzang in front of him, whose gaze grew increasingly fierce!
The Celestial Hound quickly bowed his head and squashed the ant, saying, "Reverend, I was talking about another one, that one without a single hair on its head, shiny as a thief..."
By the time he looked up again, Tang Sanzang had thrown away the hair in his hand, and under the sunlight, his head was shiny, shiny, shinily reflective!
The Celestial Hound, with a cry in his voice, said, "Reverend, why did you grab a bunch of horse hair to go along with my act?"
Tang Sanzang's gaze was no longer fierce, but almost crazed!
The Celestial Hound felt as if he had fallen into an ice cave, cold all over, as if he could die at any moment. In his panic, he suddenly remembered something and cried out, "Reverend, how can we have meat without wine? I have some fine Jadescent Nectar here, how about you give it a try?"
Clang, the pot almost flipped over.
Just as the Celestial Hound was about to scold Sha Wujing for not being able to steady a pot, Sha Wujing grabbed him and stared into his eyes, saying firmly, "Brother, you misspoke just now, you don't have any wine."
The Celestial Hound said, "I do have it... it's hanging around my..."
Before he could finish, Zhu Ganglie joined in, and together with Sha Wujing they squeezed the Celestial Hound in the middle, both with threatening faces, gritting their teeth, "Dead dog, have you forgotten? You didn't bring any wine!"
The Celestial Hound was clever, and from their reactions, he knew that wine might not be something good, as it could easily bring trouble.
But when the Celestial Hound saw the bald man's reaction, he hesitated.
All he saw was the bald man's eyes lighting up, rubbing his hands together and saying, "Are you sure you have wine? If you really have good wine, I'll pretend nothing happened before! And we'll only eat beef today, not dog meat!"
Upon hearing this, the Celestial Hound quickly shouted, "Yes, yes, yes, it's what I have hanging around my neck!"
Then another voice spoke up, "If you wanted to drink wine, you should've said so earlier! I've got several jars in my cave, why go through all this trouble?"
It was the Rhino King waking up.
Or rather, he had been awake all along, just feigning unconsciousness.
Tang Sanzang fixed his gaze on the Green Ox and asked, "Are you sure?"
"Positive! I swear, if I'm lying, I'm a puppy!" the Rhino King shouted.
The Celestial Hound quickly added, "Right, if he's lying, he's my son!"
"Get lost!" the Rhino King cursed.
The Celestial Hound retorted confidently, "You said it yourself, if you're lying then you're a puppy. I'm the ancestral hound, so if you're a puppy, I'm your father, and you're even making a profit."
"Get lost, calf!" the Rhino King cursed again and then quickly said to Tang Sanzang, "Reverend, as long as you don't kill me or eat me, I'll provide enough wine! How much you want, I have. You two stop bothering me, I'm telling the truth!"
The Rhino King scolded Zhu Ganglie and Sha Wujing to stop bothering him, preventing him from speaking, while patting his chest to guarantee.
Tang Sanzang laughed, "Very well, very well, good meat is nothing compared to good wine, as long as you supply me with enough wine, I'm observing a fast today!"
Zhu Ganglie quickly shouted, "Master, you can't drink wine while fasting."
Tang Sanzang said, "Then let's not fast. Wujing, get ready to cook pork as a snack to accompany the wine!"
"Master, what I mean is, we shouldn't drink less during the fasting period, we must drink enough!" Zhu Ganglie hastily corrected himself.
Tang Sanzang nodded in satisfaction and said, "That's more like it. Howlers, is that jug hanging around your neck filled with liquor?"
Howlers rushed over and handed up the jar of wine, "This is it, the absolute best, the Jadescent Nectar from the heavens. Would you like a taste?"
On the other side, King Rhino also shouted, "I have several in my cave... Sha Wujing, stop pawing at me!"
Seeing Tang Sanzang looking over, Sha Wujing quickly let go and said, "Master, I was helping him out of the pot."
"Did I ask for your help? I'm not disabled." King Rhino stood up and yelled, "Elder Tang, there are several vats of wine in my cave. Each vat is filled with a lot of good wine, extremely delicious! Would you like to try some too?"
Tang Sanzang had his fill of meat along the journey, savouring various mountain delicacies and an array of creatures great and small.
But he hadn't had a single drop of wine...
The alcohol worm in his belly had long ago started to rebel, it was just a pity that no matter where he went, he had not stumbled upon a drop of liquor!
He had encountered several tricksters who claimed to invite him for a drink, yet before he could even taste it, the encounter was over.
So, in Tang Sanzang's eyes, the wine was much more precious than gold.
Now, hearing that there was wine, and plenty of it, how could Tang Sanzang not be excited?
Seeing Tang Sanzang's excitement, King Rhino hurriedly called into the cave, "Minions, bring out the wine, bring it all out!"
As he spoke, the gates of the dwelling opened, and Little Black Ox led the way as a group of small demons carried out a big vat measuring one meter and seventy-eight centimeters. As soon as the lid of the vat was opened, the aroma of wine filled the air, spreading throughout the entire forest!
King Rhino, overjoyed, said, "This wine has been my treasured collection for many years, ah... Zhu Ganglie, Sha Wujing, White Dragon Horse, where are you going?"
In the distance, the three rascals had already sneakily run off. Hearing the shout, they quickened their pace even more.
King Rhino frowned but didn't bother with the three of them, instead, he turned back to Tang Sanzang and said, "Elder Tang, would you like to have a taste?"
On the other side, Tang Sanzang was already intoxicated and enjoying the moment, his face flushed red from the alcohol fumes, although he hadn't had a drop. His bald head glistened just like a marinated egg...
Howlers, afraid that King Rhino might steal his thunder, hurriedly said, "Honorable monk, try mine first. His might be the finest of the mortal realm, but mine is the liquor of the heavens."
"Yes, yes, yes! I shall try it now!" Tang Sanzang picked up the jar, cracked open the clay seal, and was immediately hit with the rich scent of alcohol.
Tang Sanzang's eyes turned blood-red, and he laughed maniacally, "Good, good, good! This is the one!"
As he spoke, Tang Sanzang lifted the jar, tilted his head back, and started to chug with a guzzle sound.
Seeing this scene, Howlers smiled delightedly and shot a victorious glance at King Rhino.
In their view, whoever's liquor was tastier would surely earn Tang Sanzang's special pardon; as long as they didn't end up in the pot, it was a battle to the end between the two.
Howlers hadn't even finished smiling when suddenly, with a bam, the wine jar in Tang Sanzang's hand fell to the ground and shattered into pieces.
Howlers was startled and turned to ask, "Honorable monk, the wine doesn't suit your taste?"
"Who're you calling honorable monk? Who the hell is the honorable monk, eh? With my elegant long hair..." Tang Sanzang staggered as he felt his head, then...
"Where's my hair?!"