Isekai’d Shoggoth

Bridgit is very pensive in the morning. So pensive, in fact, I'm suspecting she is half-way certain she had simply dreamt up the events of the previous evening. So I just have to do something silly about it. She squawks as I casually wrap an arm around her waist and dip her to kiss her properly.

"...Mistress..." - she whines as I pull back - "You're horrible." It's obvious she's not referring to my kissing abilities.

"You know, I wanted to do that for the longest time ever. Having a cute maid is such a bother when you can't kiss her as the mood strikes." - I offer to her conversationally, straightening her up. She blushes.

"Why didn't you just... do it before? You know I wouldn't have resisted." - she asks quietly.

I raise my brow. That's... a pretty good question, actually. Contemporary morals would see nothing wrong with that. "To put it very simple, Bridgit?" - I offer to her, - "It would be hollow. See, it is actually really easy for me to satisfy just about any kind of carnal desire I might ever fancy. I can change my face, shape, gender, species pretty much at will. I have more money than I can spend. I am a noble and therefore have a huge amount of liberties. In short, my life is made out of advantage on advantage. And that makes me picky about things. The thing I want above all else, however, is that one thing I can't buy, conquer, claim or steal. The reciprocity. The greatest desire I have is to be desired."

I leave her with that conundrum and depart to partake in studies. Which, to be honest, aren't really much so far. Mostly lectures on history, etiquette and surprisingly politics. Apparently, actual magic courses are slated to come in once the initial month-long initiation will pass. This is, of course, very beneficial for commoners who would otherwise be fish out of water in the societal complexities of aristocracy, but also surprisingly in demand by nobles from the outskirts. Of which I'm technically included, to be honest. I already know the stuff, but that would be because I subsumed everything the library had already. Little known fact - shoggoths can read as fast as one can flip the pages. So, really, all I have to do is flicker the book from end to end and put it back on the shelf. Another little known fact - it's a tradition in Academy to use the library as a stashbox for messages. I had found seventeen love letters of various authorship stuffed into some of the older books. The oldest of them must be over a century old, if my impromptu analysis of ink degradation rate is right. Letters, that is. The oldest book in the library is exactly two hundred seventy one years old, it's a hand-written tome on "Ye Moste Commone Maladye Mendications Moste Excellente". Given that the rest of the tome is written in much more comprehensive language, I assume the author penned the name so purple for the sole purpose of attracting attention to the tome. In fact, this feels like a book penned by a commoner being mindful of not making this too "vulgar" for nobles to bother with. Some of the recipes make me shudder, however. Shredded onion up the nose, really? Ew, ew, ew, ew. I suppose it would be efficient, but EW!

More worrying, I have found two missives that clearly indicate an intent to commit treason. One of them I set aside due to having been present at the author's execution a couple years before. Other is much older, at least fifty years if I'm right, and the name on it... Yes, well, I'm going to keep this one. It's a big leverage, if needs be. Of course, if I ever use it, it will have to be discreet. Or I have to be ready for a ducal house to be toppled. Either or. Duke in question did not actually transgress against me or the kingdom in any visible way so far, so either this letter was a moment of teenage stupidity, or the duke in question is going to be a problem later. I hope for first, because ambition that makes allowances for that long of a wait? That's not personal interest, that's a conviction of familial piety that would be very hard to deal with, barring an outright extermination of family in question.

Anyway, back to our muttons. The studies prove to be of no challenge... Not that I expected otherwise, to be honest. The students, on the other hand? I think tensions are beginning to arise, and not with me. It is not uncommon for commoners in attendance to be picked on, after all. Now, there are several possible outcomes to this. Some just do the meek routine and avoid being noticed. That's the most common and well used one. Some (like Moon Unit, through no fault or intention of her own, though) end up being taken in as "vassals" to one or another noble in attendance. This is generally the safest option, barring the cases where the noble in question is being targeted. It goes without saying that Moon Unit had been seen with me often and long enough to make it spread through the whole academy that I've got my eye on her. Of course, the most prevalent opinion is that I'm "hoarding the elf", so to speak. They are known to make superb scholars, after all. I might be facing attempts to poach her.

And, there is the third, least commonly taken route among commoners. Defiance. And, of course, this is the route Selene picked for herself. Now, I don't exactly begrudge her this - she did earn a title on her merit, and that is no mean feat. But being a snob and being an aristocrat is often conflated, and I can already hear some displeased mutters about "jumped up commoners not knowing their place". In fact, a group of girls are preparing to make a scene out of it. On one hand, I can simply pretend I'm unaware. This will cause Selene some problems, and through her, problems to Ed, because Ed will doubtlessly stick up for his new beau. But, and it's an important but, Selene WILL assume I'm the moving force behind the unpleasantness, because that's how things in the game unfolded. So, with that in mind, I'm going to interfere. Not immediately, though, the gals in question are planning to make their move just before the dinner.

And so, I find Moon Unit who, unfortunately, is not in the same class as the classes are split by social standing. Class A is higher nobility, from prince to viscount, and Class B is lower nobles and commoners. Annoying, but this arrangement is only going to last for mandatory for all classes. Specialized studies are not segregated like this. Filling her in on the plan takes a few minutes... Buuut, I may have elected to duck out of view and flagrantly abuse my shapeshifting abilities to climb on the parapet with her in tow to make out in privacy.

"I never realized just how high the roof really is." - she muses, taking a look down. Thankfully, the parapet is more than tall enough to provide enough safety. Not that I'm not holding her tight regardless, of course. "So. I am not against your plan to volunteer at the temple - both you and I are more than qualified to, and Academy looks favorably on such. I'm somewhat befuddled by your intent to include lady Selene, though. While it's true she's also a powerful light mage, I've been hearing she's not fond of you in the slightest. So, why?"

"To put it simply? She's been told a lot of fanciful stories about evil nobles in general and Gillespies in particular. I'm not sure who or why, but it's apparently someone with a big grudge towards my family." - I offer - "That being said, I'm not actually anything she thinks I should have been, and she has begun to see the difference between the villainess painted in the story and actual person. I want to further hammer in that I'm not who she thinks I am, and volunteering to heal people is a good proof it is so. I hope that once she sees I'm not actually out there to drink baby blood and hatch evil schemes in a sordid lair, she'll get more amiable."

"And what about the rumor she is seeing your fiancee behind your back?" - Moon Unit quips, as she scans the crowd below - "Wouldn't she be wary of that?"

"Yes, she would." - I admit - "Which is why I'm bothering you about it. She'll be much more at ease if there is an independent witness to the whole thing."

"I'm hardly independent, you know." - she objects - "I've already been approached by some of the classmates to find out how did I manage to attract your attention. My race was the popular first guess, but my magic prowess was a close second." She pauses and giggles, snuggling to my side - "Though no one yet guessed you're having more intimate interests in mind."

"True, but I don't think Selene actually knows yet. She is aware I'm on polite terms with everyone I've met yet, I'm sure, which is giving her a pause. She clearly expected me to be a haughty harridan." - I offer - "Oh, hey, look. This is interesting." There is Selene in the corner of the yard. And there are four girls around her, "talking". She's clearly not comfortable with topic, but not distressed enough to fight or flee just yet. Interrupt time. I lift Moon Unit and hold her in bridal carry as I leap over the parapet and poof out the "skirt" to silly proportions, parachuting down easily. The girls are not aware of my fancy arrival. Selene obviously is, given her sudden wide-eyed look and outstretched hand. I set Moon Unit down just in time to face the four turning to me.

"Good day, ladies. Are you quite done with lady Selene? I have a business to discuss with her. Private business." - I offer with a smile. My smile widens as the foursome promptly evaporates, citing "important duties elsewhere". Selene gives me and Moon Unit a very nonplussed look.

"I don't need your help..." - she begins pretty heatedly, and I shrug at her.

"...What are you talking about?" - I toss back, as she trails off - "I came over to ask if you want to join me and Moon Unit. We plan to volunteer healing at the temple today, and you're also a light mage. I thought I'd be courteous and ask if you want to tag along."

She starts saying something inflammatory, bites off the words before they actually come out, and grumbles in confusion. "Since when are you a light mage?" - she finally ventures.

Raising my hand, I let the simplest light spell coalesce on my palm, a ball of golden light casting flickers on our faces and clothes. "Since always?" - I retort sardonically - "Look. I don't know what you've been told about me, but it's obviously off the mark. By far. Maybe they meant someone else, maybe they were just confused. Don't know, don't care. You can figure that out on your own." I sigh and gesture around expansively, letting the spell disperse - "So. Are you in or not?"

___

In the end, Selene didn't have any real choice, of course. She was to accompany me, and that was it. As I stroll ahead, I can see her dawdling and pulling Moon Unit back a little out of the corner of my eye. Of course, I'm not letting either of them out of my eyesight and earshot, but Selene is not aware just how far my field of awareness truly stretches with all the eyespiders maintaining the perimeter.

"Is she coercing you?" - bah, Selene. So uncouth.

"Pardon me?!" - Moon Unit is understandably enraged - "What is WRONG with you?!"

"What do you mean, what is wrong with me? Lady Gillespie is the villainess! Why wouldn't I think she coerces you?" - aand Selene proves herself to be obstinately stupid. Or just obstinate. We'll see.

"The villainess, huh? Well, would you care to name one villainy to her name, then?" - my elven waifu to the rescue. Damn it. Listening to her defending me makes me horny.

"Well, she is... I mean, she would... The engagement... Gah!" - and Selene finally sees the light, I guess.

"Yes? Do continue. Is she the villainess because she's engaged to the prince you have your eye on, perchance?" - Moon Unit inquires venomously.

"YES! I mean NO. I mean... OK! Fine. She's not coercing you, I got it. Sheesh. What's wrong with me worrying about people?" - goodness, Selene, really? This is... advanced levels of hypocritical, right there.

"That's nice of you to notice. But we're talking about the hypothetical villainies of Aly... lady Gillespie." - and of course Moon Unit is not giving up on this. Go girl go. "To the best of my knowledge, being engaged to a prince is not a crime, even if someone else likes that prince too. So what villainies do you ascribe to lady Gillespie, I ask again?"

I have a feeling this conversation is going to end up with a catfight before long, so I slow down my stride to let them catch up.

"Alright, ladies, time to cool it." - I quip sotto voce - "Moon Unit, don't be too hard on her. The hardest prejudice to let go is an unfounded one. Give lady Selene time to work through her feelings. She likely grew up learning to hate me, putting aside her whole childhood is going to be hard no matter the contradicting facts."

I wrap my arm around Moon Unit's waist as I talk to her, and I can literally feel her relaxing. Selene gawks at the sight, then hurries up to catch up. "For the record, I'm not prejudiced." - she grumbles - "I'm honest."

I heave a little sigh. "Is it truly honesty if you can't even explain it?" - I offer - "Want to know what I really think? You're calling me villainess not because of what I already did. You do so because you believe you've seen the future where I did."

Aaand Selene promptly faceplants into the pavement as she turns to gawp at me and stumbles over her own foot.