Irwin's Journey - The Cardsmith

Chapter 61: Grief and wailing



The next day was one of grief and wailing. From waking in a tower full of tired and depressed guards to walking through a destroyed town, Irwin was glad when he finally finished at Trimdir's. It was probably the first time since the start of the winter that he would be happy to leave the heat of the furnaces for his quiet room.

Trimdir had left early, handing him a card and telling him he wouldn't be back till the next day. He'd not explained where he was going, and Irwin had been too preoccupied to ask. Now that the day was almost over, all he could think of was heading back to his room and reforging one of his cards to rare. He still didn't know exactly which one.

But before that, he had something else he needed to do.

Lamia was sitting with her back against her anvil, as she had for most of the day. Anyone that had approached her had been met with a dull stare. There were again fewer smiths than before, and as Irwin watched the handful that had been there, working, leave, he gritted his teeth. Of the almost two dozen smiths, only seven seemed to still be alive or willing to work.

I hope they are still alive, he thought, as he thought about what he'd heard.

It had become apparent what the Frozir had been doing. They had rushed into houses, killing anything they found, and the funeral house was full, and bodies had been placed outside the walls to freeze.

How can they just… come and slaughter innocents? Irwin thought as he moved towards Lamia and sat down with his back against the wall opposite her.

Lamia didn't speak, just looking at the ground.

Irwin wanted to help, wanted to say something, but he had no idea what to do. One of the smiths had said that Lamia's house had been one of those visited by the Frozir while she was at her uncle's inn. Nobody inside had been left alive. Irwin could only imagine what she must be feeling as he thought about his mother and brother.

I hope they will be fine, he thought.

"I want to become strong," Lamia whispered, snapping him out of his own sadness.

Irwin looked up to see her gaze straight at him. "I… need…" she muttered, tears in her eyes.

Irwin scrambled forward, not sure what to do. The only thing he could think of was what his mother had always done when he or his brother had been crying. He wrapped her in his arms. Lamia shuddered, then began crying against his leather apron. Her wailing turned so intense and lost that Irwin felt tears run down his own face as he tried not to think about his own family.

How long they sat there, he didn't know, but at some point, Lamia pushed herself away. Sniffling, she wiped her face, tears still running down. It took her a few moments, but when she finally got a grip, she gritted her teeth and stared at him so intently Irwin almost backed up.

"I know you are strong, I've heard the stories! Help me… I want to make them pay!"

Irwin swallowed.

The anger in Lamia's eyes burned so bright it made him incredibly worried. Bronwyn had told him stories about people that went out to get revenge on the demons, and usually those didn't end well. Seeing her eyes glitter, seeming to demand an answer, he struggled to find something to say. He had to… help her through this. He could understand she wanted to grow stronger, and he… could help. But should he if she was going to rush out and get herself killed?

Then he thought about himself and his own reason for getting stronger. Why was he fighting?

He had hated being weak and dreamt of having a strong card that would fix his inborn disabilities. He had that now, but he still needed more strength. Why? Because he wanted to stop the portals… to save what? The world? Yes… but mostly-

Because I want to protect my family…

As he thought of his mother and brother, of Daubutim and Greldo, he clenched his jaw and looked at Lamia. She was still looking at him as if trying to draw knowledge and power from him.

"They will return and kill more people," he said softly. "And if not the Frozir, other demons."

"Then I'll kill them all," Lamia said, her hands clenched into fists. Veins throbbed on her neck.

Irwin searched for a way to express what he felt. He agreed that killing all of the demons would be best, or at least those that came and killed innocent people. Then he recalled the Galub, Ulrop. The Galub had been angry because people hunted him and his race just for their soulcards. So they killed those who came to close the portal, taking their cards.

Like a cycle, he thought.

"Why?" he asked, keeping his voice low, and s "To hurt them as you were hurt?"

"Yes!" Lamia snapped.

"But… they won't stop, and there are too many to kill them all," Irwin said, suddenly unsure of what he felt. He knew things that Lamia didn't, and even he had a hard time with it… There was only one thing he knew for sure.

"Do you know why I fight to get stronger?" he said, louder this time, as he gazed at Lamia.

"No," she muttered. He saw the confusion and anger in her eyes.

"To protect other people," Irwin said. "My family, my friends… you."

As he said it, he knew it was true. He didn't want something bad to happen to Lamia. Or to Trimdir. He liked them.

"If you get stronger just to kill demons… I don't think that's a good idea," he continued before shaking his head. "I can't explain why, but I think it will destroy who you are."

Lamia blinked, pulling back as if she was slapped. "But they killed… all of them!" she almost growled.

"Your uncle is still alive," Irwin said, hoping he was right. "Do you have more family here? Don't they need protecting?"

"Yes," Lamia said, her voice cracking as tears rolled down her eyes. "But… I want to… have to…” She gritted her teeth, striking the side of the anvil. "I'm so angry! I need something to hit! Hit those demons until they…"

"Feel your pain?" Irwin completed her sentence. "I know... But if I had to choose between saving those I love that remain and hurting the ones that killed those I couldn't save, I know what I'd choose."

As he spoke, a tiny voice deep inside asked him if he would say the same thing if his mother and brother had been killed by Frozir. Irwin shuddered, then clenched his own fists. I don't know. But I'm going to try my best to make it, so that doesn't happen, he thought.

Lamia leaned back against the anvil, her hands opening and closing while her eyes looked at a point beyond Irwin. Then her eyes focused on him, and she blinked.

"I need to think," she muttered as she scrambled up.

Irwin watched her run to the door, then stop, hand on the knob.

"Thank you, Orwin," she whispered before yanking open the door and running outside.

As the door slammed shut behind her, Irwin stared at it. He hoped what he'd said would help, and he wondered if he had even been right. As his mind calmed, he wondered if she hadn't been right. Perhaps they should just try and kill all of the demons as fast as they could.

He remained seated where he was until he noticed the light through the door crack begin to fade. Then he pushed himself up and looked around. Trimdir wasn't back, and it was hot and quiet here. Daubutim hadn't been back since the previous day, and all he could do was hope his friend was alright.

As he walked to the door, he stopped and looked around. If he was going to reforge a card to rare… why not stay here? He could close the door, so nobody could enter and would have more heat than in his own room. Besides, if those Frozir attacked again during the night, he would be safer here.

And I could combine my hand…

"Trimdir won't mind," he whispered. "And Daubutim can find me here…"

Making up his mind, he walked to the door and shoved it closed before bolting it shut. The thick beam should hold back anything that would want to come in, and he walked to the center of the room. After a second, he went into the different rooms to be absolutely sure there weren't any smiths hiding out.

Finding nothing, he took out Ambraz.

"About time!" the Anvil grunted. "Do you have any idea how stupid you were yesterday? Why didn't you just stay in your room!? Those Frozir are the worst thing for you to fight!"

Irwin stared at the Anvil hovering angrily before him. He didn't know what to say. The Anvil was correct. After a second, he sighed.

"Are you ready to reforge one of my cards?" he asked softly.

"Bah. Sure, change the conversation…" Ambraz muttered. "Anyway… yes, I am ready. Have you decided which one?"

Irwin raised his hand, shaking his head sadly.

"No… I was hoping you could tell me what would be the one to help me the most."

Ambraz clicked his tongue, an oddly metallic sound.

"About time you decided to ask someone that actually knows what's what," the Anvil snapped. "Well, it depends, doesn't it? If you reforge Coperion Body, you can turn it into an improved version, which will increase the duration of the active ability while strengthening the passive effect. If you do Eyes of Blaze and focus solely on the body reforging passive, you will become much stronger, especially in hot environments, but your cold weakness will become even worse."

"I don't want that-" Irwin began, only to be interrupted by Ambraz.

"Tssk, tssk. I wasn't done. After you reforge that card, I presume you are going to combine them?"

Irwin blinked, then nodded.

"I thought as much," Ambraz said. "I think that's the smart thing to do. This world is sliding down faster than I've ever seen, and I'm getting more and more confused by what I'm seeing. Demons summoning a portal? Unheard off. The only places portals can be summoned on a whim are farming worlds."

Irwin felt his skin crawl and the hair on his arms rise. "You can't mean that this is a farming world," he whispered, afraid. "You said those are world shards!"

"Well… there are entire worlds that are turned into farming worlds. And it would explain some things," the Anvil muttered. "But, no. That doesn't explain the portals spawning so fast. Unless…” Ambraz faltered.

"Unless what?" Irwin asked.

"Unless this is a farming world that has served its purpose," Ambraz whispered, his voice laced with fear.

"What do you mean?"

"Farming worlds don't remain useful," Ambraz said. "When their resources are depleted, they are abandoned. The portals to the hub worlds will be closed, and dozens of normal portals begin cropping up for each that is closed."

Irwin stared dumbly at the Anvil. Their world couldn't be a farm world! It… it… But what if it is?

"What… what do we do if that is the case?"

Ambraz was quiet for a while.

"I don't know…" he finally said. "If this is true, then the world beyond that wall you told me about would be filled with demon surges and portals. If you could find a portal to a hub world, you could flee and survive. But…”

"I would have to leave everyone here?" Irwin snapped angrily. "They would die!"

Ambraz's metal lips curved down, and he sighed. "I guess that's not an option. Well.. we still don't know this is really a farming world. Let's not get ahead of oursel-"

"How do we find out?" Irwin asked.

"Err…. by finding a portal to a hubworld?"

Irwin slumped. "How do we even find those? There are so many portals here, and who knows how many more beyond the wall?"

"Oh, that's easy," Ambraz sniffed. "They are twice as tall and have golden lightning bolts. Pretty easy to recognize, really."

Irwin stared at his feet, unsure he'd heard right. Then he looked up and shook his head. "Those are legendary portals…" he hissed.

"And what would you know?" Ambraz snapped back." Legendary portals aren't that tall! Barely taller than normal portals!"

Irwin sat down, his mind buzzing. He knew he'd heard about a portal like that… back in history class. Something about Gelwin closing one? Or entering? He couldn't recall. But he did recall where it was supposed to be. Just beyond the wall, in the ruins of a city that used to sit there.

There had to be a history book somewhere in town… perhaps a library?

"Daubutim will know," he suddenly said.

"What?" Ambraz asked, confused.

"Nothing. Why did you say I should reforge my Eyes of Blaze?"

"Dammit, I didn't say that! I said that you shouldn't not choose it based on a false assumption! Well… I didn't say that either, but it's the same thing. If you are going to combine your hand, you can attempt to use the heat from your flame and combine it with Coperion Body's passive effect. That should offset most of your weaknesses."

"I can combine an active effect with a passive effect?" Irwin asked, surprised. With all he'd heard about combining his cards, he wasn't sure about the exact details.

"Yes… you really don't know much. Well, your first card always becomes the core, but then you can pick one active or passive effect of the other two cards. There will be more effects merging, strengthening, some even weakening but the effect is almost always better than before…"

Irwin sat back. "Shouldn't I reforge my Coperion Body then?"

"You could, but that one is already doing for you what it needs to, and even if the timer becomes longer, how much stronger will it really make you?"

Ambraz' is right, Irwin thought, staring at the Anvil. He was using Coperion Body as a last-minute resort sometimes, but mostly to combat his cold weakness. If he could get rid of that?

"There's one thing you need to remember," Ambraz said as if recalling something. "After this, you will only have three more slots, one of which is required to be legendary. Well, if you want to become a heartbound at some point."

By Gelwin's beard… I forgot about that! Irwin grunted. He raised his hand and sighed. He'd imagined he would reforge his first card, but that was out of the question now. He would probably be dead before that moment.

"I guess getting Fire-sensitive body to legendary is out then," he said with a sad sigh.

"Yes, but who cares," Ambraz snorted. "It's a good card, great even for becoming a cardsmith, better even than I'd initially imagined, but… for combat?"

"Will I become a weaker heartbound if I only have one legendary?"

"Bah, you worry over things that make no sense!" Ambraz snapped. "First off, I've never heard of someone with only legendary cards on any of the non-core worl…. errr…" He sniffed, then continued softer. "There are nearly no smiths able to make them, and you need to sacrifice anywhere between three and ten special cards to create one. And yes, technically, you could find a demon that could drop one if you could kill it. I've seen heartbound that had three legendaries being beaten by those with one."

Irwin sighed, then nodded. Ambraz was right. Besides, he could always wait before combining his right hand until he'd reforged everything to legendary!

"Alright… What is the best combination I could make?" he asked.

"The one I just told you," Ambraz replied calmly. "Obviously. You need to reduce your weakness while getting stronger. This is the best way with your current cards."

Irwin sat up straight as he thought of what Ambraz had said.

With my current cards…

"What if I replace a card with something else?" he asked.

"..."

"Ambraz?"

"You… could. But do you have any idea the torment you would go through? If you combine that with the pain of having to combine your cards..."

Irwin paled, then shivered. "Never mind," he muttered. If even Ambraz hesitated after he'd let him reforge a card and go through the pain as before... No. He'd rather not.

He remained quiet, thinking about all of the potential combinations, asking Ambraz about them. The only one that seemed to have any potential was his flame and Eyes of Blaze active to create a much more powerful fire beam. Sadly, that meant his weakness would only get stronger as it meant reforging Eye's of Blaze without any potential fix for his cold problems.

"Fine." Irwin said as he got back up and stared at the Anvil. "Let's reforge Eyes of Blaze."

"I will increase the passive body tempering part," Ambraz said. "So don't expect a great increase in the other abilities."

"I know. How do we start?"

"By you feeding me another card," Ambraz said, letting out a weary sigh. "I'll need it, because you won't be able to help much this time."

"Why not?" Irwin asked, reluctant to lose another of his rapidly dwindling common cards.

"Because you will be doing your best to keep your hand there, focused on your card, hammering your hand while crying to your mommy. That's why," Ambraz said grimly.

Irwin felt all of the hairs on his body stand on end. "I have to hit my own hand?" he asked.

"Yes. I can't do this without your help. Normally, you would have to do this or feed me a rare card. I don't think either is an option, is it?"

"No," Irwin said slowly.

He stared at his hand, then around. His fear was bubbling near the surface, but he kept a lid on it as he thought about Lamia's crying, his family, and all the other things he wanted to protect. After a moment, he threw another common card at Ambraz, staring at the thin stack he had remaining.

They won't help anyone enough if I can't become strong enough to survive, he thought.

Somehow, the thought cleared his cluttered mind, and he remembered what had happened the previous times he'd reforged his cards. Slowly he removed all of his clothing except for his underwear. Then he began firing up two of the forges, stoking the fire hotter and hotter. Ambraz said nothing, crunching softly on the card.

"Alright, let's do this," Irwin said. Without giving himself a chance to second guess, he put his hand on the forge and focused on Eyes of Blaze. An image appeared above his hand, marred by dozens of black splotches and a few sparkling stars. Two burning red eyes amidst swirling clouds of gaseous fire.

"Wait," Ambraz grunted.

Irwin felt something pressing against his cards. A foreign entity, cold and hard, it slowly wrapped around his middle card.

"Alright, this will not hurt as much as the previous time because you will do it yourself… mostly," Ambraz said, sounding strained. "Hit when I say, and don't, under any circumstance, remove your hand!"

Irwin clenched his jaw, triggered Coperion Body, and waited, fear coursing through his veins.

"Now," Ambraz grunted, and Irwin struck. It felt like he hit his hand with a hammer, shattering the bones within, and he couldn't help but let out a whimper.

"Again."

Irwin struck again, unconsciously holding back a little. The pain came again as if his hand had been repaired just to be snapped apart once more.

"Again, harder!"

He struck again, tears running down his eyes.

"Again."

More pain.

"Again."

At some point, part of him knew that he was shouting each time he struck the card, but most of him were barely conscious. His eyes were blurry, and all that registered were the voice and the pain.

--

Daubutim increased his pace, now sprinting across the dark square as he heard the scream of pain. Muted and distant, he recognized it immediately.

"What… what is going on?"

An old man moved out of the nearby building, a look of fear on his face.

Daubutim slowed down, his thoughts stilling and his mind close to shutting down. What could he say? What- His methodic mind pushed a memory to the surface, almost like picking up a book. It was one he'd hated. A lesson with his brothers. One on torture, and- He cut the thoughts off, a trick he'd learned early on. He knew what to do now.

"Someone is having their bones reset," he whispered, ignoring the coldness in his own voice. "There is nothing you can do. Go back inside."

"At Trimdir's?" the man said, sounding dubious.

"It's one of his smiths. His house was destroyed by the demons," Daubutim said, copying something he'd heard in the tower. He didn't stop walking and by now was past the old man and at the door. He entered the alleyway, now out of sight, and rushed to the door. A dull hammering came from inside, and each was accompanied by a muted whimper or shout.

He is reforging his own card!

Daubutim tried to open the door, but it wouldn't budge. Forcing all of his strength on the handle only caused it to creak dangerously, and he tried pushing the door, but it felt like shoving a wall.

Damnit, Irwin, he thought as he pressed his hands against the door. Why didn't you wait for me!

--

A flash of light barely registered as Irwin raised his hand mechanically. His jaw was shivering uncontrollably, his face stained with tears.

"Done," Ambraz croaked. "Stop, fool! It's done!"

Irwin's hand lowered, and he sank down as if his bones had melted. He lay on the ground, tired and weary, when a shiver ran through him. Then another.

Cold…

The thought barely registered, and as the cold increased, he curled up in a ball, eyes closed shut.

It didn't help!

It was too cold!

Wait... the cold from one side was less. He slowly unfurled, his body seeming unwilling to comply. Barely able to move, he clawed and crawled his way toward where it was less cold. The closer he got, the less cold it became, then he reached something high. It took an effort to climb up, and then his hand touched something warm. It felt so wonderful that he managed to urge his almost frozen-solid body onward, climbing fully into the warmth.

As it touched him and surrounded him, his mind cleared slightly, and he thought he had heard something.

Then his weary mind cared for nothing anymore, and he curled up in the warmth.

Warm.


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