I’m really not the Saviour! (我唔係救主囖!)

13 – Master, your sense of naming sucks



CW: Little bit of reference to gore. Just a little.

This chapter is just an excuse for me to slip the names of some of my favourite characters from other media into this story.

"They're... not good," Chan Bik offered.

"The arrival of demons has raised many social and economic problems," Cheng Baak-hap supplied.

"It's complicated," was Gou Dzing's answer.

"... they're not the worst," said Sek Gon.

Gaam Bing smirked and then immediately hid his smile behind gruff coughing and tea slurping.

"Well, Little Gou, time for a test once again. Explain yourself."

"Oh I think Cheng Si-mui would do a much better job than me."

“That's nice. So what's your answer?”

Gou Dzing's tone was long-suffering, but he gathered his thoughts and launched into a lesson. "Demons first began appearing about a year ago-”

“Thirteen and a half months,” Cheng Baak-hap supplied.

“- and didn't initially seem to be causing much trouble. I seem to remember I was training basic grappling techniques to the Junior Disciples when a messenger brought news of weird creatures being sighted in the east. The teachers and Senior Disciples decided a small group should go and have a look. Who was it that went...?”

“The young mistress of the Chiu Family from the Still Heart School, Mo Tong1磨糖 (mo4 tong2) - “to grind” and “sugar”. This is a shameless reference to one of my favourite danmei characters, Tang Mo from The Earth is Online. Si-dai from our own school -”

“Mo Si-dai's a good kid.”

“- Yau Wak2游惑 (yau4 wak6) – “to swim” and “to mislead or confuse”. This is a reference to another of my favourite danmei characters, You Huo from Global Examination. Si-dai from the Clear Sight School - “

“He's a little nuisance.”

“- Hon Ngaa Leun3韓芽鱗 (hon4 ngaa4 leun4) – Hon is an old family name referring to a state that existed during the warring states period. The rest of the name means “bud” and “fish scale”. These two words together in Korean is a botany term referring to a scale-like protective layer over a bud. this is a reference to Han Arin from the Korean BL novel Traces of the Sun. Si-dze from the Gales of Battle School, and Geui Baak Kei4鉅白冀 (geui6 baak6 kei3) - “iron”, “pure”, “hope”, a reference to Baekgi from a great Korean GL novel, The Iron Inside. Si-mui from the School of Reflective Arts.”

“Decent,” was Sek Gon's assessment, surprising everyone present.

“In the end, they weren't able to find out much, only that these creatures did exist, in all kinds of shapes and sizes. Some were humanoid, some shaped like beasts. It was only as the months went on that news came in of the trouble they were beginning to cause. Stealing, at first. But it became violent. So we called the scouting group back and I led a group of senior disciples to help defend the people.”

“And that's when you got the Jade Exorcist name?” Chan Bik asked keenly.

Gou Dzing shrugged, clearly embarrassed. “I suppose. Anyway, we're not entirely sure what the demons' motives are. There's been no large-scale assault, although bigger and bigger groups have been appearing to attack villages and now even larger towns. With all the stealing happening, it seems they want food and weapons. But they can't speak any human languages, and we can't understand theirs.”

“And that's where we come to our current issue,” the Grandmaster finally interjected. "Ling Gwong may have been taken by them as a hostage."

Chan Bik, Gou Dzing and Cheng Baak-hap broke out talking all at once.

"They did what?"

"Is that even possible?"

"How would we even negotiate with them?"

The Grandmaster thumped the table so hard to quiet them down that a crack appeared in the wood. "Ah, damn it, I liked this one... Settle down, children. Really, the discipline here is slipping..."

Gaam Bing sniffed and tried not to look proud of his silently listening disciple.

"Don't look like that, you left your disciple behind to go off doing who-knows-what for ten years. How he has turned out is nothing to do with you!"

The big man visibly deflated and sulkily toyed with his tea cup. The Grandmaster rubbed her temples as if she had a headache. "I checked all of Ling Gwong's usual haunts. Nothing. I spoke to Dzap Ming and Maang Dzeung, they hadn't seen her. I asked my family, my children and grandchildren - nothing. I checked Ling Gwong's temples - the monks and nuns there reported strange fluctuations in the divine flames. And then, markings began appearing around Dzue. Where there were flat surfaces - cliffs, walls - my granddaughter is the spirit of the river there, and she gave me a transcription of the marks."

The Grandmaster smoothed out a page. Strange scratches and scribbles, that bore no resemblance to anything they recognised, covered the paper. "They were all drawn in blood."

"Not Lord Ling Gwong's..."

"No, demon blood."

"Their own kind? Why-"

“Perhaps they were imbued with some kind of power from the blood?”

“Nothing of a sort was found.”

"Perhaps they're short on resources" Cheng Baak-hap mused thoughtfully. "If their first action upon finding human settlements was to steal food and weapons, then perhaps they're struggling... they could be short on wood, are unlikely to have any paper... ink would require some kind of glue, and also water, which they probably only use for drinking now... Taking blood would make sense, because if the demon died then that would mean one less mouth to feed..."

Chan Bik shivered in horror. Cheng Baak-hap squeezed her hand. "Sorry, Bik Si-mui, that sounded cruel. I was focused on the logic of it. And this is all hypothetical."

"Old White thinks these are probably ransom letters." The Grandmaster distracted them away from the implications of the demons' chosen writing material by bringing their attention back to the markings themselves. "We've been trying to interpret them, but no luck yet..."

"Let me give my disciple his name first."

"How do you want to do it?"

"We should have a big ceremony," Cheng Baak-hap suggested at once. "If we organise food and drink for a hundred people, and use the Prosperity Hall..."

"Sounds like a lot of work," Gaam Bing grumbled.

"That does sound like a lot of fuss," the Grandmaster said, yawning.

"... I don't care." Sek Gon shrugged, when he realised everyone was waiting for his opinion.

Gou Dzing stood and bowed quickly to everyone. "Just one thing."

He raced from the room. The Grandmaster raised her eyebrows but within a few moments, Gou Dzing was back. "Here. My family sent this a while ago, but I didn't have a use for it."

It was a small bronze flask, intricately decorated and clearly intended for ceremonial use. Gaam Bing looked interested for the first time since his arrival.

"Sit down, Old White. Little Cheng, bring some nicer cups."

Cheng Baak-hap left and returned, a little out of breath, with six small flat bowls with little handles on the side of them. Each was made of copper and as intricately decorated as Gou Dzing's flask.

"Oh, I'd forgotten about those. They're the nicest ones we have. Good work."

Chan Bik hurried to pour the wine, as the youngest person present, but Gou Dzing stayed her hand. "I'll do it, Chan Si-mui. You've never had to pour wine, have you?"

He doled out the clear liquid carefully. Gaam Bing looked disappointed at the small amount of liquid in his cup, but the Grandmaster eyed him narrowly. "Don't sulk, you drunkard. This is a ceremony, not a drinking party."

Gaam Bing cleared his throat gruffly and called Sek Gon to sit beside him. They sat awkwardly side-by-side, almost, but not quite facing each other. The Grandmaster rolled her eyes. Gou Dzing tried not to laugh.

"Ahem... Disciple Sek Gon. I take that name and give you a new one... Please don't use that old one again."

At the faintly pleading tone in Gaam Bing's voice, Gou Dzing really did laugh that time. He had to mentally recite the foundational scriptures of the Fool's Way of the Mountain to bring himself under control.

"When I found you..." Gaam Bing's mouth twitched. "You've achieved a great deal, my disciple. Think of this new name as a gift. From now on, when you introduce yourself, you will be Gaam Yuk Ying5監鈺瑩 (gaam1 yuk6 ying4) - Gaam Bing has given Sek Gon his own family name, Gaam, and the given name Yuk Ying meaning 'treasure' or 'a hard metal' and 'a jade-like stone'. The fact that a divine creature has given Sek Gon his own family name is a huge thing, but our stubborn hero is only concerned with the fact that the given name sounds feminine lol

And it's also about jade. Again.."

And he tipped his share of wine into his mouth like a cup of water on hot steel.

"... what?"

"... Master... that sounds like a girl's name."

"It isn't! Shut up and accept the name!"

"... thank you, Master." Gaam Yuk Ying bowed, and drank down his wine. A glum look crossed his usually impassive face. "... girl's name... Jade..." he muttered.

"You ungrateful little brat!"

"Gaam Yuk Ying, congratulations!" Gou Dzing interrupted, unable to hold his laughter any longer. He drank the wine, and one by one, the others followed suit. The Grandmaster was last.

Before she drank, she paused and shook her head at the pair. "Stubborn fools. I thought earth-attribute people were the worst. Look at you two!"

Gaam Bing grumbled indistinctly. Gaam Yuk Ying fiddled with his cup.

"Do we have any more wine, Little Cheng?"

"There is some for guests."

"Bring it. I can't stand looking at this miserable old bastard."

Gaam Bing was too pleased at the concept of more wine to object to the Grandmaster's tone. He watched eagerly as Cheng Baak-hap returned with more rice wine.

"How does it feel?" Gou Dzing asked, patting Gaam Yuk Ying on the shoulder.

The other boy shrugged. "It's girly."

"No, it isn't, you're being sensitive about it. And even if it was, would that matter? That old- your master must really care about you, to give you a name like that." He realised that Gaam Yuk Ying was twisting his fingers in his lap.

Gou Dzing squeezed his shoulder. "Hey, before your master drinks too much, don't you want to tell him how you really feel?"

"..."

The silvery eyes flickered up to meet his. He could see the anxiety there in those shining flecks.

Ah... they really are pretty.

"Go on."

"... Master?"

Gaam Bing paused with his cup halfway to his mouth. "Little brat?"

"... thank you."

"You already said that."

"... thank you for taking me away. Thank you for giving me food. Thank you for teaching me. Thank you for giving me new clothing. Thank you for looking after me. Thank you -"

"Enough! Enough!" A combination of wine and embarrassment had Gaam Bing's entire face flaming red. He glared at the sniggering Grandmaster. "I understand-"

"Thank you for giving me a name..." Gaam Yuk Ying's hands were clenched into fists. "I'll... carry it well. I'll make sure it'll be an honourable one." He bowed to the floor.

Gaam Bing coughed and shuffled. "Get up, kid. Here, have some wine." He poured the pungent liquid into Gaam Yuk Ying's cup and raised his own in a toast. "Let's drink!"

Chan Bik was giggling after a couple of cups. Cheng Baak-hap became more and more dignified as she drank, eventually declaring that she was going to help Chan Bik to return to the Clear Sight School despite how much she swayed when she stood. Gaam Yuk Ying had not spoken a word since thanking his Master, and Gou Dzing thought it best to leave the Grandmaster and Gaam Bing to continue their party themselves, now that both were engaged in a drinking competition that seemed intent of proving who had the more resilient liver. He tapped Gaam Yuk Ying on the shoulder and they both slipped out into the night air, cool on their warm faces.

They wandered in companionable silence until Gou Dzing realised that they didn't seem to be headed anywhere in particular. He took a deep breath and blew it out forcefully. "We should go to bed, Gaam Si-hing. Ha... That'll take some getting used to."

"You can keep calling me Sek Gon, if you want."

"As funny as that is, I'll pass. I think Yuk Ying suits you."

"... What part of me is a treasure? You're the 'Jade' of Mount Faa."

"Do you dislike that?"

"... not really."

Gou Dzing turned - he realised that perhaps he had drunk a bit much, as his head felt light - and grabbed Gaam Yuk Ying's face between his hands, lifting the young man's eyes to meet his. The heavy lids blinked slowly, and Gou Dzing realised that the other man was at least a little tipsy too.

"You're a treasure and a jade."

"... You're drunk."

"I'll say it again when I'm not, so you'll believe me."

Gaam Yuk Ying placed his own hands on Gou Dzing's wrists. With his level of cultivation, he could easily break free, but instead, he said, "... You're not really interested in Cheng Si-mui, are you?"

"You've been listening to that gossip? No... It's just... useful, you know? For both of us."

"Good."

Gaam Yuk Ying slipped out from between Gou Dzing's hands, rose up on his toes, and planted a soft kiss on the other man's surprised lips. "Good night."

And walked away.

Dazed, Gou Dzing watched him leave, and wondered vaguely if he would make it to bed without passing out.

Well, goodbye to our euphemistic Huge Tree Trunk. It was fun knowing you


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