I Don’t Want to Start a Story!

“Ya hear about the shepherd boy?”

“Which one?” Max feigned ignorance as he swallowed the last of his cold soup. Bessie had decided it was a girls’ night, so she had gone out to the village. This left farmer Jill and Max to eat whatever leftovers they could find.

“Pimple face.”

“What about him?”

“Got killed.”

Max waited for Jill to continue, but he seemed to forget the conversation as he had moved on to picking apart a slice of the mouldy bread they had found in the back of the cupboard. “How’d he die?” He eventually prompted. There was no doubt the shepherd boy was doomed the moment he interacted with the meteorite, but there was a prompt for a story afterwards about hunting him down. He hadn’t seen it in a while. Did it mean someone became the main character for that story and completed it? It would’ve been quick if that were the case. Or was it cancelled?

“Fell down the well.”

“… He fell down the well?” Was it an accident or was he pushed?

“Fell down the well,” Jill repeated before snorting back some of the mucus accruing in his throat. “Andy said he was starting to go mad, real frothing at the mouth and shit.”

“Like rabies?”

“That’s what Andy thought before he saw him panicking and rushing from the farmhouse. And saw him trip into the well…”

Story Name:

Baa-nshees

Genre:

Horror

Description:

A flock of sheep is beginning to mutate and developing a taste for blood after drinking a contaminated well.

Goal:

Survive the sheep apocalypse.

Difficulty:

★★☆☆☆

How to Start:

Watch the sheep drink from the well!

Max stared at the prompt as an idea crossed his mind. “Maybe we should send our vet over to Andy’s farm? It would be bad if the sheep got sick from drinking the shepherd boy’s juices.” And there was a chance Cy could become the main character of this story and be out of his hair as he dealt with the mutant sheep. Two stars was deadly enough to get unfocused people killed.

“Nah, Andy’s probably going to plug up the well since it’s too narrow to get him out. But speakin' of the weirdo, where is he?” Farmer Jill took out his pack of contraband cigarettes. It was forbidden for them to smoke under Bessie’s roof. Every time she left the house, Jill would sneak a secret smoke before getting ripped apart when she came home. He offered Max one, who shook his head. “You’re missing out on heaven,” he muttered under his breath before erupting into volatile coughs. It casted a dark cloud over heaven. “Ya don’t think he’s out with Bessie, do ya?”

“You think Bessie invited him out on a girls’ night?” Jill gave a snort. “I don’t know to be honest; I haven’t seen him since this afternoon. Aldwin freaked him out with some magic bones.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out three bones he was gifted earlier. Tormenting Cy was becoming Aldwin’s favourite hobby, and he seemed pleased his friend was willing to join in on the fun.

Farmer Jill gave a crusty laugh as he picked up one of the bones and examined it closer. The sound made Max flinch slightly in empathy. It sounded painful. “Magic bones, eh? I suppose he got them from Martin.”

“Martin would have magic bones to sell?”

“Know anyone else who would be selling ‘magic bones’?” Jill had a point, only Martin would have the nerve to sell ‘obviously’ fake items like magic bones. The farmer took a closer look at the bones. He was about to say something before the pair heard a bang from the floor above. A scattering of dust rained down on them, confirming where the noise had come from. “The fuck was that? Ya think the aliens are after us now?”

Story Name:

???

Genre:

???

Description:

???

Goal:

???

Difficulty:

★★★★★

How to Start:

Ignore Cy!

“Cy is home.” Max let out a sigh. “Maybe Bessie came home with him?” Realisation struck him like thunder as he began cleaning up before she could see what old food they had been eating. Cy may have been willing to pretend to be a vet, but it was becoming pretty FUCKING obvious he wasn’t just an ordinary vet. Didn’t Aldwin say magic users try to hide their identity? So, what was he doing? Maybe he’s itching to be outed.

“Bessie!?” Farmer Jill spluttered as he frantically put out his cigarette and began trying to wave away the scent which would undoubtedly linger for hours. “How? We didn’t see them come through the front door?”

“Good question. You should ask the vet when you get a chance.”

They didn’t have to wait long for a rosy flushed Cy to tumble down the stairs. Magic didn’t seem to be his only talent since he was soon back up on two wobbly feet without any help from the men trying to hide evidence of rotting food and cigarettes. “Hey guys-”

“How the fuck did ya get in here?” The farmer barked.

“Shh,” Cy grinned. “Bessie’s sleeping.” The two relaxed back in their seats as Cy began trying to bat the dust he had gathered from the tumble off of his clothes. Their skin was safe for another night. “And we came in through the window.”

“The window?” Farmer Jill wasn’t convinced. “How’d ya get Bessie through a window on the second floor?”

“Ladder.” Cy was unconcerned with his scepticism. Max got up and peaked out of the window. It was a shock to see there was a ladder leaning against the farmhouse. He gave Jill a nod to confirm his story. The farmer jumped up to take a look for himself. “But never mind that, look what I brought back with me.” Cy reached into his coat and pulled out two bottles of whiskey. In a moment, Bessie’s dry house was in shambles, and the magical vet suddenly had two temporary friends.