I Don’t Want to be a Villainess

I usually didn’t memorize flower names.

I only knew about the famous flowers that you see often in daily life, like cherry blossoms, roses, tulips, and carnations. Other than that, I was almost clueless.

But I still liked looking at flowers. I didn’t go out of my way to find them, but every now and then, I’d catch sight of the vibrant flowers in front of a flower shop while walking by. I had never thought to buy any, except for a few times when I got carnations for my parents.

So, I didn’t know the names of the flowers in the flower garden at all.

But I liked them. They were pretty.

Click.

I heard that sound and looked up to see Sohee pointing her smartphone camera at me.

“Uh, ah, it’s just… pretty.”

When our eyes met, Sohee awkwardly smiled and lowered her phone, looking embarrassed.

I wasn’t against being photographed, well, as long as it wasn’t a stranger sneaking a pic like that time it happened in the article. I didn’t mind close friends taking my picture.

Well, I still didn’t like when unknown people took sneaky shots.

I still don’t like it when strangers take photos.

That voice inside me, Sara, said.

I felt a slight fear from it.

…I guess I need to be cautious about that next time.

Seeing my lack of response, Sohee wondered silently, then quickly picked a photo from the ones she just took and showed it to me.

In the photo, I was squatting down in front of a flower garden, gazing quietly at an unidentified flower—myself caught by Sara’s lens.

It was a nice shot. With the sunny and clear weather, the photo turned out very bright.

“What do you think? Is it okay?”

Sohee asked for confirmation, and I nodded.

“Ah.”

Hana, who had been watching us from the side, clapped her hands and said,

“Then let’s take a photo all together! We’ve never taken one as a group until now.”

Oh.

Come to think of it, that’s true. Given how often we hung out, we hadn’t taken many photos at all. I almost didn’t even think about it!

“That sounds good!”

Ha Neul vigorously nodded along.

“Alright, then.”

As I stood up to respond, I added,

“Let’s take a group shot!”

*

As is common when such words come up, one picture wasn’t enough. Perhaps due to the fact that they had been holding back all along, Sohee, Sua, and Ha Neul all wanted to take turns snapping photos beside me.

“Okay, let’s do this.”

One, two, three! At Yang Hye-in’s signal, I heard the click of the smartphone camera.

Excluding selfies, all the remaining pictures were taken by Yang Hye-in.

We took a picture with me in the center, crossed arms, swapped spots and took another, and after the group had taken their turns, the kids seemed satisfied.

Well, we’d be taking a lot more pictures at other spots too. Since I had given my permission.

Fortunately, it seemed Sara didn’t mind taking pictures.

“……”

However, I oddly felt something was missing when I tried to move to another spot.

It felt like I’d forgotten something, like my pocket was empty, or I was leaving something behind.

I only realized what that feeling was once I stepped out towards the edge of the flower garden.

“Yang Hye-in, aren’t you going to take a picture?”

When I asked that without thinking, the group came to a sudden halt.

“…….”

Yang Hye-in stared at me stiffly. Being taller than me and looking at me with a serious expression was a bit intimidating, but in reality, she was only a little older than I was. Plus, we were employer and employee.

Oh right, calling her by name was a first for me.

Feeling awkward to refer to her by name, I often chose not to call her anything at all. Sometimes I simply called her ‘maid’.

But I couldn’t keep referring to her like that outside.

To think about it, Sohee was also my personal maid.

“…… Won’t you take a picture?”

At my question, Yang Hye-in hesitated for a moment before nodding.

“I will take one.”

Her voice was slightly tense for some reason.

*

Surprisingly enough, the amusement park built on a mountain still had areas left to explore.

The Ferris wheel, which could be called the park’s trademark, was even higher than the flower garden that was already at a relatively high altitude. I understood; the higher a Ferris wheel is, the better the view.

With the weather this clear, not riding the Ferris wheel would be a disservice to the amusement park.

The Ferris wheel from the amusement park where I used to live had stopped working due to aging, but it seemed that wasn’t the case here.

From the signs, the old one had been completely demolished and rebuilt with a similar design. I guess since the group had plenty of money, they could do such things without a second thought.

Naturally, there were tons of others who had the same thought as us, and there was a long line of people waiting for the Ferris wheel.

Fortunately, people were continuously getting on and off, so we didn’t have to wait too long compared to the number of people waiting.

This time, Ha Neul ended up riding with me.

Yang Hye-in said she would wait outside, but considering we had come this far, I felt it was a bit odd for her to stand there alone, so I invited her to join, which meant we were split into two teams again.

With a maximum capacity of four people for the Ferris wheel, we decided on splitting into three and two.

I thought it might be less uncomfortable for me to go with Yang Hye-in, but for some reason, the group insisted that I had to go with the pair. Eventually, we divided ourselves that way.

The method of division this time was to flip our palms.

And that’s how Ha Neul and I ended up in one gondola together.

“…….”

“…….”

Um.

Riding together felt a bit awkward.

Sitting facing each other in the narrow gondola, it was slightly uncomfortable now that we were actually here.

What should we talk about?

Come to think of it, we’d never watched a movie or TV show together. We hadn’t even discussed our favorite foods. Somehow we had become friends who hung out together, yet we knew so little about each other.

…No, there was one thing we shared.

In fact, the reason I felt a bit awkward at this moment was related to that.

Ha Neul knew that I wasn’t ‘Sara’.

She was the only one who treated me as a ‘different personality’, not as a ‘memory’.

The last conversation we had was about exactly that, so I didn’t know what to say next.

“Is ‘Sara’ still with you?”

Just then, while I pondered on that, Ha Neul asked.

I turned my gaze from the window, finding Ha Neul looking directly at me.

“Yeah, she’s still with me.”

I felt relief that I didn’t have to break the ice, yet at the same time, the awkwardness of the topic made the situation uncomfortable.

“I see.”

Ha Neul mumbled that, then asked,

“Can I move to the seat next to you?”

“Uh? Of course, you can….”

I tried to say that, but I was startled by an uncomfortable sensation deep inside me again.

Uh… Why did Sara react like that to Ha Neul’s words?

However, even before I could question that feeling, Ha Neul had already seated herself right beside me.

Right beside me.

So close.

“I’ve been thinking.”

“Uh, yeah.”

I found it hard to look directly at Ha Neul’s face.

Our shoulders brushed against each other. If I turned my head a little, our noses would almost touch.

“What if Sara’s memory changes with strong emotions, right?”

“Th-that’s, true?”

At least until now, that seemed to be the case. I would prefer if there was a better method.

“And Sara’s strongest emotions come out when she meets the chairwoman of Yujin Group.”

“Uh… but….”

While Ha Neul spoke, she inched closer to me. Desperately staring out the window, I couldn’t see her expression.

The uncomfortable feeling inside me intensified bit by bit.

Was it that Sara really disliked physical contact with others?

Ha Neul’s arm stretched behind my back. The other arm was in front of me.

Ha Neul moved close to me and wrapped her arms around me as if to cage me in.

“Uh, uh, Ha Neul?”

“So, I was thinking; I believe there’s another way to switch your personalities.”

“…Huh?”

Those words struck me with a sudden blush.

They were shockingly revealing, enough to blow away all the feelings I was having.

“How…?”

I unconsciously turned my head, almost brushing my lips against Ha Neul’s. She was blushing deeply right in front of me.

“Ah, uh… um…”

In that moment, I couldn’t form a word.

“If the personality switches from feeling strong emotions,”

With each of Ha Neul’s words, her breath grazed me. We were so close to each other, I could barely see anything except for her deep eyes.

“Then we just need to create that strong emotion, right?”

The discomfort within my chest surged to almost unbearable levels.

“Uh, uh, wait a moment…!”

Ha Neul’s face came even closer to mine.

Once again, our breaths mixed, and—

*

—I found myself back in my own body at a moment I never wanted.

“……”

“……”

The moment Yoo Ha-neul approached that person, her face halted abruptly.

“……It’s you.”

The hands that had been wrapped around my body loosened. Yoo Ha-neul stepped back from me, creating distance as she showed her disapproval of physical contact, yet I didn’t mind that much.

“…… So, were you trying to use that as an excuse to kiss?”

“…… No, I was just genuinely curious if it would work.”

“Guess you’re disappointed it didn’t happen.”

“……”

By her silent demeanor, she seemed truly disappointed.

Honestly, I was surprised. I never imagined that sitting so close to her would become a medium to evoke such ‘strong emotions’ within me.

…Though that ’emotion’ was definitely a different kind than what she felt towards Ha Neul.

Every time I sat close to Ha Neul, what she felt would be excitement and embarrassment.

But the feelings I experienced while sitting against Yoo Ha-neul were… both embarrassment and discomfort.

The direction of emotions was directed inward.

“……”

“……”

Unintentionally, we found an alternative method to achieve something, and for a while, we sat there without saying a word, only gazing in opposite directions.

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