I didn’t ask to be the Demon Queen

The sword hit my arm with a dull thud. Everyone stopped moving. I stood there, terrified, waiting for my brain to catch up and tell me just how much pain I was supposed to be in. It was like the world held its breath, there wasn’t a sound for a moment, except for the Hero’s panting. Then he lifted the sword and I saw there wasn’t a scratch on me. My arm didn’t start bleeding or fall off or anything. I looked at my arm, then back up at him. 

 

He screamed again and raised the sword again. Knowing it hadn’t actually hurt me the first time did very little to reduce my fear of a second attack, and I stood frozen as he brought the sword down a second time. And a third. Every time, the sword hit with the sound of steel hitting something solid but soft. Every time, the strike barely registered. His attacks weren’t hurting. Nevertheless, tears filled my eyes, not out of fear, but because of the sheer pain and terror that emanated from the man as he hammered away at me, all rage and no finesse or technique, no strategy or reason to his attacks. I could only back away and make myself small as he continued his assault. Kazumi and Queen Anastasia stood frozen in place, clearly not knowing what to do. 

 

My back bumped into one of the tentpoles, and I couldn’t move away any further as the hero yelled at me, his attacks becoming slower. He was clearly exhausted. His face was wet with tears, his eyes red. Finally he raised the sword one more time and as it struck my arm without having much of an impact, it dropped from his hands and he sank to his knees and sobbed. I couldn’t help but cry. He was in so much pain. His beard was unkempt, his hair a dirty mess. His armor was dirty. I couldn’t help but wonder what had pushed him to this. The Hero of Eferton was supposed to be a paragon of virtue (even if you picked the “I’m an asshole” option in every dialogue choice), so seeing him brought down like this was jarring. I’d never played as the default male Hero, but I knew what he was supposed to look like. 

 

I got on my knees in front of him, crying because of his pain and did the only logical thing, before Anastasia could say anything, before Kazumi could jump to my defense. 

 

I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him in close.

 

“It’s okay,” I mumbled, softly. I had no idea what was wrong with him, and what ‘it’ was, but I knew from experience that sometimes what you needed most was someone telling you your pain was real, that you were allowed to feel it, and that it was all going to be okay. He sobbed in my arms, but slowly his heaving sobs became soft breathing. I pulled away and looked at him. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “Why do… why this? What’s wrong?”

 

It wasn’t the most eloquent way of phrasing it but I was more than a little shaken up, myself. He looked at me with tired eyes, red from crying. He opened and closed his mouth a few times. When he finally spoke, his voice cracked. The screaming had done some damage to his voice. 

 

“You… did this to me.”

 

That was confusing. I’d been under the impression that the Demon Queen hadn’t had any prior contact with the hero prior to the DLC. I didn’t understand.

 

“What did… I do to you?” I asked, my hands limply in my lap.

 

He sniffed and wiped his nose on the back of his hand. He looked very small as he sat there, on his knees. “I woke up and… my friends told me you’d done something to me… during our fight… but I don’t remember. I didn’t… remember my friends. You… you did something to my mind… You… I don’t even know who I am…”

 

Oh.

 

Oh.

 

Oh!

 

“You… hold on…”

 

I paused. How best to do this, I wondered. I didn’t want to shock whoever this was too much, and didn’t want them to think I was manipulating them, somehow. That was the last thing I wanted. This person needed to feel safe. 

 

“What… what’s the last thing you remember? Before you and I… fought?”

 

They looked at me with suspicion, but answered. “I was… someone else. There was a man, about to be hit by a… vehicle. I tried to push him out of the way but I was… too late.”

 

I was shocked, for only a second. Of course that’s who it had been. I’d remembered feeling hands against my back… A part of me felt relieved I wasn’t the only one, which made me feel guilty in turn. Clearly they were upset. They didn’t deserve this. 

 

What I wanted to do was tell them that that had been me. That I was the person they’d tried pushing out of the way. That they’d tried to save my life. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to think of myself as a man, anymore. Something about that felt wrong. I realized I hadn’t been thinking of myself like that in some time, and anything but Liz felt incredibly wrong. I couldn’t put my finger on why, but being referred to as a ‘him’ physically hurt. But at least my suspicions were confirmed. 

 

“Pizza,” I said instead. 

 

The Hero looked at me with confusion. “What?”

 

“Ska.”

 

“I don’t… why are…”

 

“Telephones. Race cars. Television. Germany. Chainsaw.”

 

Their expression shifted from confusion to recognition to realization.

 

“Wait…” they said. “Are you saying that… but what if you put those words in my head… home…”

 

“Earth,” I said. “I’m afraid I’m not clever enough to make up something like home. Or line dancing.”

 

“But what…”

 

“I’m new here too,” I said, quietly, so Queen Anastasia, at least, couldn’t hear me. Kazumi already knew I wasn’t from here. 

 

The Hero looked at me. “You’re not…?”

 

I shook my head. “No, I’m not. I… what’s your name?”

 

Hypothetically, the Hero’s standard male name was Daniel. 

 

“My name is Sally. I think. I don’t know anymore,” she said, as she began to cry again. I pulled her in again and they didn’t resist.

 

“Thank you,” I said.

 

“W-what for?”

 

“Trying to push me out of the way.”

 

“That… that was you?” 

 

I nodded. “M-hm.”

 

Looking up at Anastasia and Kazumi, I realized the look on their faces would have been hilarious if the situation hadn’t been different. Kazumi looked on in utter shock, but I could also see the small knife she had in the palm of her hand, half-hidden. I shook my head subtly at her. Queen Anastasia stood completely frozen in place. She must’ve been so confused. I hadn’t had a good look at her before, but she was truly beautiful, almost angelic. I knew she hadn’t been rendered with this much detail in the game, and she was even more striking in person. Her eyes were a bright blue, in stark contrast to her beautiful blonde hair. 

 

“I… Queen Anastasia, if you’re okay with it, I’d like to continue our talks. This is just a sort of misunderstanding. Nothing worse.”

She looked like a fish out of water, until she remembered her royal training and bowed her head. 

 

“Of course, Queen Eliza. I hope you’ll forgive my second’s outburst.” 

 

I shook my head. “No worries. A misunderstanding with no repercussions.”

 

The person in my arms suddenly seemed like someone else entirely. I’d thought of them as the Hero of Eferton, before, an adversary that was destined to slay me. But now all I could see was a girl, someone who was wearing a man-suit that didn’t fit and made them feel like they were going insane. I could relate to that, and I felt a deep and powerful urge to protect her.

 

Queen Anastasia sat down in the chair, a little less ladylike than was perhaps appropriate, and she sighed. 

 

“Do you know what’s wrong with him?” she asked softly. She’d clearly been worried. Still, feeling like she was incorrectly gendering her made me hurt in her stead.

 

I thought about my answer for a bit. I couldn’t tell her that she and I came from a different world. Not just like that, Queen Anastasia wouldn’t believe it.

 

“Me and… we fought. Almost… two months ago? I think?” I chewed my lip, trying to find the right words. “We both… came out of that fight as different people.”

 

She nodded. Of course she’d heard of the Hero’s impromptu attack on the old queen, and its disastrous consequences. 

 

“I just… get what she’s going through.”

 

“She?”

 

Oops.

 

“This…” I let go of Sally. She was almost limp in my arms. She must’ve been exhausted. I wondered how long she’d been struggling with this new world. I felt like she had no idea what had happened, and she must’ve been told she’d had her mind altered for weeks. The realization that you’re not mad must’ve been a relief and a shock all at once, and the toll it had taken was showing itself now. “This isn’t the person you once knew, Queen Anastasia. As far as I can tell, it’s best to think of them as someone else entirely.”

 

“But… how?”

 

I sighed. “I’d love to explain to you what I know, but I’m afraid now might not be the best time?”

 

She nodded, clearly worried about someone she cared about. I thought for a moment. I didn’t want her to feel like she was walking into a trap, but on the other hand, I didn’t want to end the talks just like that.

 

“I have a proposal, Queen Anastasia.”

 

“Oh?”

 

I nodded my head back towards Shereton and Whitehallow castle.

 

“If you wish, we can continue the talks soon. But I believe that... “ I gently nudged at the limp figure still in my arms, “needs rest. If you want, you can use the field near Whitehallow to station your troops. If you feel like you’re threatened,  you’d be in an ideal position to take it, right?”

 

She nodded. I’d be putting myself and a very valuable strategic location in a very vulnerable position. It was a show of trust and I hoped she saw it that way too;

 

“I think I can help them. But not here. We can continue our talks in Whitehallow or outside of it, whatever you like better.”

 

She thought about this for a while.

 

“Very well, Queen Eliza. We’ll join you. I hope you can help them, and perhaps this show of good faith will go a long way to mend the rift between our territories.” 

 

‘The rift you caused’, her tone seemed to imply. That was fair, but I was eager to prove her wrong about me. I hoped that helping the person she considered a close friend would go a long way to doing just that. Though explaining to her that the original Hero of Eferton was, for all intents and purposes, dead, would not go over well. I wondered how Tybalt and the rest of the Hero’s companions would react. 

 

The big question now, I thought, as I lifted Sally up, was who was going to take them. If I just carried the now-sleeping figure off, it might be seen as an act of war or even kidnapping, something even the ever-charming Queen Anastasia would have difficulty explaining. But I couldn’t imagine the companions trusting me enough to come with me. I nodded as gracefully as I could.

 

“Thank you for your understanding. And your patience.” I said with all the royal courtesy Erza and Kazumi had managed to get into my head over the past few weeks. 

 

“Queen Eliza…” Anastasia said softly. “If you really can help them… thank you.” 

 

“We’re cool,” I said, and almost failed to notice the expression she made. “Uh… think nothing of it, Queen Anastasia.” I corrected myself. I still didn’t know how to get Sally to the castle, until Kazumi finally spoke up.

 

“Perhaps, your ladyships,” she piped up carefully. We both turned to her. “Perhaps you and say, a cadre of guards, could ride with us in Queen Eliza’s carriage? And have a mix of both guard units walk along?”

 

We both considered this for a moment. Well, that wasn’t true. I instantly agreed with whatever Kazumi offered -- she was better at this than I was -- but I didn’t say anything yet so as not to seem too eager. It could easily come off as a trap, after all. I waited to hear Anastasia’s response. She nodded and stood up. 

 

“I’ll collect the companions, and we’ll ride in your carriage.” She seemed to realize that if I’d had any nefarious plans against her, I would’ve executed them already. 

 

The hero lay in my arms, and I realized the irony of the big demon woman carrying the noble knight like a damsel in distress. The whole situation was absurd. “I’ll wait here for the carriage, then?”

 

Kazumi nodded and slithered off, and Queen Anastasia made her way back to her army, and I felt very sheepish just sort of standing there, with a woman named Sally in my arms, and considered the next few hours. It was going to be an uncomfortable carriage ride at best, and I hoped that Queen Anastasia would manage to defuse tensions before things got too bad. I wasn’t in the mood to get attacked again. I wasn’t sure how well I’d fare against people who actually knew what they were doing. The companions wouldn’t have been a match for the old queen, but I couldn’t even throw a punch. They’d probably be able to do some real damage. 

 

Boy, sitting in a carriage full of people who thought I’d brainwashed their closest friend and ally would be a trip. Especially considering that the truth was that their friend was already dead. Earning their trust would be almost impossible. Then I realized that the Hero wouldn’t even be the only person they’d see as someone I’d taken from them. After all, Sabine was going to be in the carriage too, looking decidedly undead and quite loyal to me. 

 

Fun.