NOVEL WEB Chapter 185
Not being able to access the internet was my only complaint about this prison life, but honestly, it wasn’t that big of a deal.
During the empty hours with nobody coming by, I’d just chill out with some catnip, and whenever the kids showed up, I’d host them soberly, so I never really had a dull moment.
Take Ageha for example—she came by every day to show me how the world was spinning.
“So, Eileen’s gone and switched sides, huh? Luckily, it seems Jack’s kicked the bucket. The Liberators are completely finished now. They can’t even gather their remnants to make a comeback.”
“…Are you serious, was that your intention? To bring them back later?”
Ageha asked that with a slightly disgusted expression, but of course, that thought never crossed my mind.
“Not a chance. No desire for that either. Even if I did, I lack the ability.”
The Liberators belonged to that individual, and themoment he died, my fate was sealed with his.
Thinking of reviving him would be like draping myself in a corpse’s skin—absolutely blasphemous, not a shred of interest in doing that.
“You’re surprisingly firm on this.”
“Trying to resurrect a failure while claiming it wasn’t a failure? That just leads to despair, right?”
That might be true. Ageha muttered, sounding a bit discontent. Maybe sensing the awkwardness, she switched topics back to normal chatter.
Stuff about the Academy, what they’re teaching now, ideological education, and all that weird moving stuff.
Honestly, none of it caught my interest, so I just tuned in to Ageha’s voice while pretending to watch a video.
“Blanca, could you at least pretend to show some interest? I did come here with effort!”
But it was obvious that her dissatisfaction was visible, and I couldn’t keep that up forever. Ageha had become increasingly bothersome since I last saw her.
Or had she always been this annoying? Now that I think about it, she had a knack for being a bit of a hassle.
Once I started responding appropriately to her comments, she finally stopped being a nuisance and dived passionately into a stream of conversation.
Nothing particularly interesting came up. Not that it was too boring either. Just small talk to pass the time.
As we exchanged pointless chatter, Ageha seemed to run out of things to say and ultimately pivoted to discussing the Liberators and the Evil Society.
She really didn’t want to talk about those things.
When I asked a few days ago why she was avoiding it, she said she didn’t want to bring heavy topics into a good conversation with a friend.
But isn’t the essence of friendship being open about sensitive subjects? I thought that until I realized we weren’t exactly normal friends.
I shrugged it off.
“Oh, right. Blanca, you just said the Liberators were done for, right? But from what I know, there are still a few remnants left, aren’t there?”
She asked if Hanchō and Butler hadn’t been caught yet.
“Well, that’s true. But I’m a bit skeptical about whether that old fart Butler’s on our side. His name is even a pseudonym. Who names themselves Butler?”
“But… don’t they have last names? Otherwise, my last name would mean ‘living on the summit’.”
Is that what Toojū meant?
“Last name and first name… hmm, do they match? Are they different? Who cares? It’s all a fake name anyway.”
As I pondered and found it head-spinning, I brushed it off saying, what’s even the point?
“That’s true. But they must have seen his real face. How can he keep running away?”
In response to Ageha’s question, I covered my face with slime to look like someone else without saying a word.
“Could it really work like that?”
“It’s an old guy handing out money to anti-social organizations while money just rots away. Who knows? He could be a high-ranking official of Heros Company or the president, and that’s why they can’t catch him.”
“Isn’t that taking it too far?”
She twisted her hair a bit, saying that seemed too far-fetched but conceded that rich people could get missed. But what about that thug?
“Thug? Oh, Hanchō? If you’re asking me, I wouldn’t know either. Hm, maybe he’s built a cabin somewhere and lives happily alone?”
“…On the outskirts of the city? No matter how skilled an Abilities User is, can that even happen?”
“That’s right, so asking me wouldn’t help. He might have already died off somewhere. Or maybe he’s just living alright. Who knows?”
“You once said you cherished the Liberators like family, didn’t you?”
“The only ones I considered family were that individual and Justitia. They were my parents and siblings. The other members? Honestly, I wasn’t close to them at all.”
Of them, Hanchō was the closest, but in terms of absolute distance, we were practically strangers.
“Is that so… Did you feel that way about them enough to throw away your future for them?”
“Without those two, I wouldn’t have been able to escape that lab. Oh, but maybe that’s not true. I might have been saved by someone else.”
“If that were true, it wouldn’t have come to this…”
“That’s right. But what can you do about things that have already happened?”
“Still, was there really… not an abundance of chances for you, Blanca? Just grabbing hold of that one chance out of so many—”
Ageha brought up the “IF” scenario. Maybe, if only this or that had happened. I had thought the same way after he died.
But I had reached my conclusion already.
“Enough with that talk; it’s all in the past. I had plenty of opportunities, yet I kicked them all away, leaving me with this foolish mess, right?”
“No regrets?”
“As if. Every moment alive is a bundle of regrets. But looking back won’t fill my stomach or make the enemies drop dead, will it?”
Even while I displayed resolve not to be eaten by regret, Ageha threw one more question at me, sounding a bit doubtful.
“…So, Blanca, is revenge your only purpose now?”
“Exactly. I have to pay back the enemies of my family.”
“And, Blanca, you have nowhere left to return now, do you?”
“That’s harsh; it’s true, but come on.”
I was oddly miffed about why she would ask such an obvious thing.
“Then… once you’ve gotten your revenge, wouldn’t you have no reason to move forward, no place to go?”
For a moment, I didn’t grasp what she meant, stunned, before realizing she was asking me what I’d do afterward.
“I’ll figure that out later—”
I intended to say that, but Ageha cut me off.
“So, are you thinking about getting your revenge and then dying? From what I can see, it appears that’s how you look, Blanca.”
She said I looked like a flickering candle, about to stop at any moment like a rattling engine. Ageha cast me a worried glance.
…Truly, how did I end up with friends like these? I was sure I started out intending to just toss this aside.
Life is indeed bizarre, I thought to myself, and brought up a rambling topic.
“Ageha, what if there’s someone in the world who absolutely loves torturing and killing others?”
“Huh? Where did that come from?”
“Yeah, out of the blue. Just answer me. I’m curious.”
Despite the suddenness, Ageha said she’d find it terrifying and would want to stay far away if such a person existed.
“Just as I thought. But then, what if this person had a perfectly normal moral compass and could pass as an ordinary person?”
At this point, Ageha seemed to catch on that something was off, yet she continued dutifully responding to me.
“If a person like that was around, I’d really feel chills and be scared. But more than that, why are you asking this…”
“Now, think of that person having gone through a tremendously unfortunate event recently, leading them to question their own existence.”
“…”
“Wondering if this twisted conscience even deserves to live, thinking it might be better to die for the sake of everyone, especially their loved ones—what if those thoughts crossed their mind?”
“Blanca, don’t tell me…”
“Oh, did I not mention any names?”
That was a pointless remark. I had practically confessed to her that I was that sadistic type already.
Ageha just stood there, looking stunned, stuttering about saying something before finally mustering the courage to ask why I was sharing this with her.
“No need to share something like that, even with friends…”
“Honestly, I don’t even know what I’m saying. But if you stand in their shoes, wouldn’t they say something like: You admired me, after all?”
“What does that mean?”
“Maybe their mouth was itching to speak. In fact, they might be asking if you truly think they’re a friend, like this awful person. Or perhaps, they might be seeking judgment.”
“I… I don’t know…”
“Oh, it’s just a guess. Don’t take it too seriously. You can even tell the kids; if it’s that person, they’d surely think something like that.”
“I think I should take my leave now… please, take care of yourself, Blanca…”
In the end, Ageha took off like she was running away, leaving me without an answer.