I Became the Priest of Blasphemy of the Outer Gods

Chapter 111. ???

“Well, for now, most of the urgent matters have been settled. Apart from things that will naturally take time, I’ve gathered all the information I needed.”

I spoke as I turned a page. The document on the desk was a thesis written by Sharl.

Initially, I planned to read and discard it quickly while traveling in the carriage, but it was so extensive that it wasn’t possible to finish it all at once.

“And how is what you’re reading now? Enjoyable?”

“Quite well-written… I suppose,”

I replied.

Despite acknowledging the skill of the author, I found the contents unsettling.

The thesis detailed results from experiments conducted by kidnapping various human subjects and injecting them with a kind of madness.

Many were driven insane regardless of age or gender, often leading to their deaths.

If my humanity had been intact, I might have abandoned reading halfway through due to intense revulsion.

“I’ve read this much, and yet I haven’t even reached the main point,”

I sighed and closed the thesis. It was hard to focus solely on this thesis because there was more that I needed to read.

“And what is that?”

“It’s a summary of the investigation into the Lilybell and Liane families by Academia,”

I answered.

Both families were in poor condition, plagued by an illness and a curse of unknown origins.

“Even now they haven’t found a clue… I guess I’ll have to see it for myself sometime.”

“Can’t you just leave them be? There’s no reason to go out of your way for those two families, is there?”

“…… Probably not,”

I admitted honestly.

“But that’s restricted to my current self. The person I want to become would’ve undoubtedly wanted to help.”

“A troublesome matter indeed,” they remarked.

I had to rely on faint emotions and memories of what I once was to restore myself.

“But you seem at ease,” they noted.

“Perhaps because I confessed everything to Arian, and shared my true feelings,”

I replied.

After that, a weight I hadn’t realized I was carrying seemed to have been lifted.

“It’s ironic, isn’t it? I’ve been deceiving them about my identity, building a false relationship out of fear of being killed. Yet, baring my soul led to the most genuine connection…”

“Is that truly the best option, though?” came the counter.

If this wasn’t the best relationship, then what was?

“A sincere relationship sounds great, but it’s not as good as a charming deception. In the given situation, deceiving appropriately would have led to the best relationship.”

“…… No way,”

I said in denial.

“Why are you so sure? Winning someone’s favor with a well-crafted lie could have brought more benefits.”

They were insinuating that, like earning favor with Eihab through tales of his granddaughter, I should have manipulated sentiments similarly.

“Setting aside the disagreeable nature of such acts, how can false appeals genuinely sway someone’s emotions?”

“There’s a famous recruitment ad by an explorer,” they replied.

A hazardous journey, low wages, bitter cold, long months of absolute darkness, constant danger, safe return doubtful, and honor and recognition in case of success.

“Although this inspiring ad that Sir Ernest Shackleton supposedly used to recruit for his Antarctic expedition inspired many, it was actually created in later times.”

That ad was fabricated later? I scratched my head.

“I didn’t know it was a fabrication, but it’s just a dramatic example.”

“Do lovers confessing their love always stick to the absolute truth to build a home together? More often than not, exaggerations and well-crafted lies make it easier to win love.”

I still felt a strong aversion to this line of reasoning. Come to think of it…

“…… Ernest Shackleton?”

How could that name come up now? I looked up at the person opposite me.

‘Who was I even talking to?’

***

“Ethnos! Damn it…! Mary, can’t you pull him away somehow?”

Eldritch shouted desperately. Mary, frantically morphing her body, tried to stop Ethnos, but to no avail.

“Please, Ethnos, come to your senses!”

Ethnos was trying to commit suicide, driving Gluttony through his brain while spider legs stabbed through his organs.

“Can’t you even remove Gluttony?”

“It’s extremely dangerous. Just touching it is perilous.”

In distress, Mary attempted to pull part of Ethnos away, but Gluttony, with its vicious appetite and aggression, devoured anything it touched.

Thus, any effort to make contact was fraught with peril. The grotesque and sudden attempts at suicide continued incessantly.

***

“Ethnos… what are you experiencing?”

“Where do you think this is?”

A place I had never seen before. I should have been in my chamber within the castle.

‘There’s no Gluttony here, and I can’t feel any mana.’

Only I and the other were present.

“When do you think it is now? Perhaps an as-of-yet unarrived future? Or maybe a past you remember.”

It was impossible to tell. Time felt distorted. Yesterday seemed like tomorrow, and this year like last year.

‘Who even is this person?’

I couldn’t perceive them.

Despite looking at them, no information was processing in my mind, leading to confusion about whether I was actually seeing them.

“You say everything is resolved, but there was an important question you nearly skipped.”

That person spoke.

“Why does the sky change every six months? Though we dismissed it, isn’t this vital information?”

Amidst the confusion, the question seemed to forcibly lodge itself into my mind.

‘Other…’

They were preventing any other thoughts from surfacing.

“That’s simply because… the fake sky… has limitations…”

“Let me give you the answer. The Outer God attempts to use even artificially created stars as a medium to connect. If we don’t periodically change the position of the stars, they will eventually become a medium for an Outer God to cross over!”

That person said, sounding as if they were relishing the situation.

“Who are you?”

Like dye absorbed by roots and permeating a plant, my thoughts and language were forcibly altered, gradually aligning with that person’s own.

“You know who I am. The problem is you don’t know yourself.”

They spoke words of such transcendental wisdom that my humble mind could not yet comprehend.

But there was no need to understand; since their thoughts were now my thoughts, there was no need for independent contemplation.

In an effort to escape this state, I needed to act—though what could a fool like me possibly achieve?

“What was that?! In my mind…!”

“You said you wished to regain your humanity, didn’t you? It’s an amusing notion indeed. While stories in this genre often highlight the terror of an inescapable, overwhelming entity…”

Simultaneously, they explore the horror of realizing oneself was never human and transforming into a monster.

“Get out of my head… please!”

Resistance was futile. Just as futile as your attempts to reclaim your humanity.

“No…! I refuse to follow your predetermined path alongside others like you. I will undoubtedly return to being human!”

You speak as if you were once an ordinary human, don’t you?

You mercilessly killed people simply because they were criminals and even fed them to monsters without hesitation.

“That was…!”

You sought neither an ordinary human life nor relished living in the new world, nor did you long for your original one.

Is that all?

You justified horrendous acts that ordinary humans wouldn’t commit by excusing it with a strong mental fortitude.

How do you think a regular human would react when surrounded by hallucinations of spiders?

“I endured… simply because I had to.”

Tearing off one’s arm isn’t something achievable even with such mind.

Were you truly a regular human despite that?

What kind of human were you in the first place?

“Enough! I won’t yield! Never!”

You’re claiming resistance without even knowing what you’re opposing. How laughably absurd you are.

Let me offer some assistance.

“What are you doing?! Why are you… on my hand?”

There’s much you ought to understand, and isn’t there a fascinating tool for that?

You allowed the dice to roll automatically until now.

Because you couldn’t control it, you would merely glance at your hand when you needed it.

Like now, when it doesn’t roll as needed.

But how is that fulfilling?

Truly, the joy of dice is in rolling them yourself.

“What are you intending to… Could it be?!”

Dice roll. Information acquisition check.

“No, stop! I don’t want to understand or know anything!”

Rattle.

“… Ah.”

『20』

The҈̢̜̙̬̈̏͡ presence҈̨̭͔̗̓͑̍͠ from҈̢̞͚̘̔͠ the҈̛͚̠͕̽͜ spiral҈̢͔͊͐͝ of҉̢͓̦̙͂̀͝ the҉̫̦҇́͢ white҈͙̝͍͊͜ night҈̯̱͔ has҈͙̝͊͜ found҉̖́͡͞ you҉̯҇͢.

***

“Danger!”

Mary lunged forward, pushing Eldritch away.

Thud!

The tentacles of Gluttony, now grotesquely transformed, slammed into the spot where Eldritch had floated a moment before, its surface shifting into the grotesque visages of myriad faces and skulls.

But even more alarming was…

“He started attacking us…”

Ethnos, who had been caught in a suicidal spiral, abruptly changed focus and initiated an attack.

Cradling Eldritch, Mary skillfully avoided Ethnos’s ferocious onslaughts, while the tentacles of Gluttony smashed through everything in their wake.

Even then, Ethnos’s self-inflicted damage continued, with his head pierced by spider legs, leaving it dangling lifelessly, exposing his spine.

“Why is he attacking?”

“How should I know?!”

“He’s behaving weirdly. This match-up is terrible.”

It was Gluttony, more so than Ethnos, that posed a problem. Having grown in power alongside its master, Gluttony was now beyond Mary’s capacity to handle.

The stark contrast compared to before demonstrated its overwhelming dominance over her.

“His state is conspicuously abnormal, fueled by more than his own power.”

“What existence could be meddling to cause this…?!”

Crunch!

As Mary attempted to distance herself, her lower body was consumed entirely.

“When devoured, recovery slows significantly.”

Mary transformed her body like a slime to escape from Gluttony, but it writhed aggressively, stretching towards her with alarming speed.

“Blue Lance!”

The spell launched toward the menacing Gluttony dissipated into nothingness.

Despite Eldritch’s vast magical comprehension and knowledge, the discrepancy in power from the difference in rank was insurmountable. Meanwhile, transformed appendages wielded by Ethnos came swinging out, seeking to tear them apart, forcing Mary to continually alter her form to dodge each strike.

“…… At this rate, we’ll be decimated.”

It wasn’t enough to just evade; there was no one capable of subduing Ethnos truly.

Lyla, not suited for combat magic specialization, was still recovering from her last venture.

Mary, heavily outmatched by the transformed Gluttony, found the situation dire with scarce options for aid that could arrive timely.

“Is there truly no strategy? No… Ah.”

Just one. An untried method to possibly break this deadlock.

“It seems… the time has come to make a decision.”

Eldritch, eyes imbued with solemn resolve, gazed at Ethnos.