I Became the Childhood Friend Who Commits Suicide

Chapter 29

“That earlier display—do you admit it was impulsive?” Kyunga’s voice was calm but pointed.

Si woo nodded silently. It had been impulsive. There was no better way to describe it.

Hana was already in a fragile state, and he should have been more careful, but instead, he’d let his pride push him to argue without thinking.

Kyunga clicked her tongue. “Luckily, not many heard you, but…”

The whole class had witnessed Hana’s collapse. Rumors had already been circling, thanks to the incident with Han Si-hyun and his clashes with the instructor, and this event only fueled the fire.

Si woo’s face grew tense. Seeing this, Kyunga cleared her throat and offered her advice.

“I know you’re acting out of concern for Hana.”

“…”

“But you’re too anxious right now. Maybe it’s time to step back and observe from a little distance.”

“Step back? But…”

Hana had considered ending her life. She hadn’t just thought about it—she’d prepared the rope, possibly even tried it. She was like a ticking time bomb, and it felt wrong to just sit back.

“It’s not as if you’re the only one by her side.”

That stung because he knew exactly whom she meant. At some point, Sophie had naturally taken up a spot beside Hana.

“A female friend. You were the one who said it yourself, weren’t you?”

“…Yeah. You’re right.”

Sophie was exactly the kind of friend he’d wanted Hana to have. A same-gender friend, someone who shared her dorm. And when Hana collapsed, it was Sophie who’d reacted first.

Si woo knew he had to acknowledge it: right now, Hana needed someone more than him.

“Hana’s not the only one; you’re also on edge,” Kyunga added.

“…Me?”

“Yes. Because you care about her deeply as a childhood friend. And she’s probably just as worried about you.”

Could that be true? For a moment, memories of their carefree, happy childhood flashed before him.

Yes, their relationship wasn’t one-sided. They were friends, dear to each other.

‘No matter what, we’ll always be friends.’

‘Even if one of us dies or changes.’

He remembered Hana’s response in the infirmary. They would be friends, no matter what.

Forever.

—

Hana returned to class after the second period. Almost immediately, someone approached her to ask if she was okay.

“Are you feeling better?”

“Oh, yes. Thank you for checking on me.”

“After last time… Anyway, I’m glad you’re alright.”

It was a brief but friendly conversation with Juhyun. Si woo watched the scene with a complicated expression.

Kyunga’s words had been right, as much as he hated to admit it, so had Yeonhwa’s. His actions bordered on obsession, and instead of helping Hana, he was likely making things harder.

Maybe part of Hana’s unease stemmed from having no friends besides him. Perhaps the best thing he could do was welcome the fact that she was making new friends.

Still, Shin Juhyun was hard to trust. He was, after all, a boy, and Hana’s beauty was enough to stir hidden motives.

But he couldn’t just step in and interfere in her friendships without cause.

Just then, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to find an unexpected visitor—Sophie, smiling with her usual friendly demeanor.

“Si woo, can we talk for a minute?”

“Huh? What’s it about?”

“It’s about Hana.”

“…Alright.”

Slightly hesitant, Si woo nodded and followed Sophie out of the classroom.

What did she want to discuss? He couldn’t guess, not that he’d had much experience with Sophie, who was essentially a friend’s friend.

They had spoken a bit during their trip to Hana’s hometown, especially when Hana had lagged behind, but their connection ended there. Without Hana, their relationship was distant.

Her red hair and ocean-blue eyes, her small frame and delicate features—Sophie didn’t seem the least bit threatening.

Then Sophie spoke up.

“Right now, Hana is in danger.”

“…What?”

—

Hana glanced over at the empty seat next to her.

Where had Sophie gone during break? And Si woo wasn’t back yet, either.

Coincidence? Or had they gone somewhere together?

She couldn’t tell, and it didn’t really matter anyway. Maybe they’d gotten closer during the trip to her hometown.

All she wanted now was for the school day to end. This pretense of studying was getting tiring.

She would’ve loved to skip class and rest in the infirmary, but the nurse had insisted she return.

Honestly, she thought. Would it hurt her to let me stay a bit longer?

The nurse’s name was Rachel, if she remembered correctly. A bit overprotective, but not a bad person.

Yeonhwa, too, wasn’t as bad as she’d thought. Glancing over, she met Yeonhwa’s gaze, quickly averting her eyes.

Lately, Hana had been wondering: maybe attending the academy like this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

The classes were boring, of course, and getting criticized by the instructor wasn’t fun. Hearing whispers from students who thought she was a talentless nobody was irritating.

But all that was endurable. Honestly, the idea of suicide scared her more.

Especially the first time she’d tried it with a necktie… That pain and those feelings—there were no words to describe them.

If only she could somehow get rid of her illness, she wouldn’t even consider suicide.

But that was impossible. It wasn’t the kind of illness a trip to the hospital could cure.

The bell rang.

Lifting her head, she happened to catch Si woo’s gaze as he walked back into the classroom.

His expression was stiff, almost mirroring her own after a seizure.

…What was up with him?

Right behind him came Sophie. It seemed they hadn’t met by chance but had indeed been together.

When Sophie took her seat, Hana leaned over and whispered.

“What were you two up to?”

“Huh? We just bumped into each other in the hallway.”

That couldn’t be true.

Anyone could tell it was a lie.

But Sophie’s smile was so natural that Hana began to doubt herself. Maybe she was wrong. After all, Sophie had no reason to lie, did she?

Still, something felt off.

Should she ask Si woo instead?

As she was debating, the teacher entered, and she missed her chance. The rest of the period passed without an opportunity to ask.

—

After school, they gathered in the infirmary for their first club meeting.

Rachel, the nurse, gave them a dry smile and asked, “You’re really planning to hold it here?”

“Unless you have an empty room for us,” Yeonhwa replied shamelessly.

Rachel sighed and massaged her temples, muttering to herself.

“Fine. Just try to keep it down. Please.”

“We’ll try,” Yeonhwa said with a shrug.

Sophie reached into her bag and pulled something out.

“For our first club meeting, I brought a board game! It’s a deck of playing cards!”

“…Are playing cards even considered a board game?”

Hana tilted her head in confusion. Did people usually consider cards a board game?

Sophie chuckled, looking sheepish.

“Well, I bought them from the stationary store this morning… The bigger board games are only sold at supermarkets.”

Ah, that made sense. The supermarket was too far for a quick morning stop, but the stationary store was just around the corner.

No wonder Sophie had insisted on a quick stop there this morning—it had been for this.

“There are plenty of games we can play with cards! Do you want to join us, Miss Rachel?”

“No, thank you. I’m a bit busy right now.”

“Aww, that’s too bad. Guess it’s just us then.”

Yeonhwa didn’t seem too enthusiastic as she asked, “So, what game can we play with just three people? Isn’t four the usual minimum?”

“Hmm… How about ‘Old Maid’?”

“Boring.”

“Oh, really? Hana, is there a game you want to play?”

“Old Maid sounds fine to me.”

She had a few ideas, but as Yeonhwa pointed out, most card games were better with at least four players. But Old Maid could work as a 1-on-1 bluffing game, so it wasn’t bad for a smaller group.

After a brief vote, they decided on Old Maid. Despite her initial reluctance, Yeonhwa quickly became engrossed in the game.

“Hmm…”

Yeonhwa stared intently at Hana, who averted her gaze, prompting Yeonhwa to draw a card from her hand.

“Yes!”

She beamed triumphantly, while Sophie took her turn, studying Yeonhwa’s cards before pulling one. Yeonhwa instantly looked dejected.

Wow, Hana thought, her expressions are so easy to read.

Then it was Hana’s turn.

Sophie’s face was harder to decipher, an almost perfect poker face.

Why is she so good at this? Hana thought, struggling to make a choice.

Finally, she picked a card from the middle of Sophie’s hand. It was the black joker.

“…”

Barely managing to suppress her reaction, Hana maintained a neutral expression and passed the turn to Yeonhwa.

Please. Please let her pick it.

As if answering her prayer, Yeonhwa drew the joker from her hand.

“Aaagh! Damn it!”

Her shout was loud enough to draw Rachel’s scolding.

“How many times do I have to remind you to keep it down?”

“S-sorry…”

Sophie stifled a laugh, and Hana couldn’t help but chuckle too.

—

Meanwhile, Si woo walked to the library immediately after classes, his expression cold and tense.

Could it be true?

Sophie’s words echoed in his mind.

“Hana is in danger right now.”

Lost in thought, he was startled by someone calling his name.

“You’re here.”

Han Si-hyun was leaning against a library window, her attention seemingly on a book.

“So, have you found anything?”

“…I think so.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Si woo began sharing what he’d learned.

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