I Ask You, What Is Magic?

Pu-haaa!

Yummy milk, give me more! I thought while babbling "Mow! mow!" and extending my chubby arms toward the benevolent goddess feeding me milk.

It had been painfully long three of so months since my first waking, half of which I had spent sleeping.

It felt good the first couple of hundreds of times, being able to doze off whenever and wherever, but it soon got boring.

Latching on to the refilled bottle's sucker cap, I continued my train of thought.

Whenever I was awake, I would spend most of my time just observing the three people in my vicinity. Trying to comprehend what they were saying, make sense of their body language, yada yada yada.

...and it was a massive pain in my soft behind.

Whenever I felt like I understood what a syllable meant, I was quickly made to doubt myself whenever I heard it again. Regardless, I was making progress!

My relentless observation revealed that the gentle giant was referred to as what I assume is "Mom" by the two littler giants. Who in turn, addresses them as Tris and Ollie, or Tristan and Oliver when they are being a nuisance.

Tristan being the older considerate one and Oliver being the younger curious one.

Probably around six and four years old respectively.

There weren't many chances for me to know my own name, due to them using baby names for most of the time. But I still had a pretty solid guess.

Ryan.

My name from my previous life. It was hard to accept it being a coincidence, because of both the worlds having different languages, how likely was it that I would end up having same name across two lifetimes?

Still, it wasn't like I was unhappy with it or anything.

Also, in all this time, I hadn't seen someone I could associate with my birth mother or father. And honestly, I doubt I would have much empathy for them in case I do meet them. It is safe to say that these three people are now my new and only family.

Burp 

After finishing my liquid meal and giving a quick appreciation for it, I was laid back inside my woolen blanket. Which unfortunately did nothing to mitigate the silent chill tormenting me since my first waking. Though recently there have a few fleeting moments of warmth here and there, mostly in the day. So I guess summer is about to begin. Yay.

Out of the corner of my eyes, I noticed the nanny — no, my mom — pulling a chair near the window under the sunlight and then picking me up from my crib and sitting under the warm sunlight, smiling down at me gently, her silky, crimson hair shielding my eyes from direct sunlight.

She mumbled something to me as she kissed my forehead lovingly and she rocked me to sleep.

So warm...

I suddenly realised I didn't feel the silent chill anymore, but an all encompassing warmth. A warmth I had longed for so, so long.

Turning clumsily in her bosom, I reached my hands out towards her face and cried the word I had heard so many times by now.

"Mo-momma!"

I didn't know if it was the sun, or something else. But I saw her eyes glistening with a shine I had never seen before. Next thing I knew, warm droplets fell on my face as she brought her face close enough for my hands to carass her cheeks.

"Momma! Momma!"

I giggled and called out in immeasurable exhilaration as both of us cried silent tears of happiness.

Feeling a slight weight from another side, I looked to find two more people sharing in this moment, my brothers.

Not wanting to make them feel left out, I called out to them as well as my underdeveloped vocal cords allowed me to: "Trish! Owie!"

All three of them chuckled at my babyspeak, but we shared the warmth in a long, comfortable embrace regardless.

Before I fell asleep, a final thought rose to the top of my consciousness: I could get used to it.

–

–

–

Black, but white.

Dark, but lit.

Empty, but full.

Only these three phrases could vaguely describe what I could see around me.

With a start, I realised something was amiss. Touching all over myself, looking around, I started to panic.

Why? Why wasn't I a baby anymore?!

I realised, I was back to being a guy in his twenties. An orphan. Again.

Why?! What did I do wrong this time!

I tried to scream, but no voice came out.

[Calm down, Ryan.]

A calm but strong voice rang out from all around me. I stared blankly ahead with tears streaming down my quivering cheeks.

It had been over a decade, but I still remembered that voice.

"D-dad?" I cautiously called out.

[No. I am but a mere fragment of his soul fused with the AI you tried installing in your brain chip. Besides knowing you are called Ryan and how both of us ended up here, I know nothing.]

Hearing him say that, some light returned to my eyes.

"I see... And by here you mean...?"

[Yes, you did reincarnate as an infant in Velaris. You are just sleeping. This is your subconscious talking with me. Would you like to know how you ended up here?]

Without any hesitation, I replied: "Nope. I'm not in the mood for it right now. Maybe later, maybe never. I don't particularly care what happened all those years ago. For me, mom died, you died, and then I died. I have no attachments to my old life. If at all possible, I want a new start. I hope you understand."

[...very well.] The voice from the void conceded.

Now in a cheerful mood again, I inquired: "So how do I leave here and return?"

[That's easy, I pulled out your subconscious to have a chat with you. I can put you back to sleep.]

"Yes, please. Much appreciated." I replied with an energetic nod and a smile.

–

–

–

[Good morning, Ryan.]

Huh,

I looked around and found myself all wrapped up back in the crib. But there was a change...

Why is there a text window floating in front of me?

[That would be because of the thin sheet of nanites covering your retina and projecting—]

I know how the ENAMAL works! Why is it here?! I asked in my mind, and babbled out loud.

[You said you weren't curious about it.] The voice and the screen replied.

I know, I know, forget about it. I don't care. Being reincarnated in and of itself is a miracle, having a couple of my old possessions coming through with me is no big deal. I mentally dismissed.

[...]

So? Are you going to accompany me to my grave or something?

[That seems to be the case, yes.] The text replied.

Sigh, I guess it can't be helped then, What do I call you then? I'm not going to call you dad. My dad is dead. I thought back nonchalantly as I searched for anyone in the room.

[A name is unnecessary.]

The hell it is not! I'm not going to talk to 'The Voice' or 'The Text' in my head for the rest of my life! Either give me a name or I'll call you... codex. Yeah, Codex.

[...Codex is fine, then.] Codex replied.

Wow, you folded quickly. Yep, definitely not my dad. I nodded sagely.

Not finding anyone in the room and feeling my bowels swell, I let out the biggest shriek I could.

Breath in... "Huuuu,"

"MAMMMAAA!"