HP X LOTM : Please Call Me Mr. Error.

"The hel-!!!!" Hermione almost screamed but shut herself up by slapping her hand on her mouth as she looked at her reflection in the plate Ron was holding up for her.

Instead of her face in it, she saw a girl with several ink masks drawn on her face. The ink wasn't directly on her face and was hovering a few centimetres away from it as if held by an invisible power.

The face mask disguised her as a sort of humanoid rabbit that had tall bunny ears and a pointed nose along with fake teeth that stuck out of her lips a little.

In any other scenario, Hermione would've likely glossed over the mask, possibly even praising the artistic talent of whoever made it, but when the mask was following her head around as she moved it to get a better look at it in the shiny plate, her mind exploded with anger.

Hermione's thoughts buzzed around wildly before locking onto the only person that she was sure was responsible for this.

'LOKI!!!!!'

Hermione's eyes scanned the crowd in the great hall before they locked onto the simple boy sitting at the Slytherin table along with others like Tracy and Astoria who were all holding back their laughter while Loki was whispering into their ears.

Hermione blushed in embarrassment before quickly pulling out her wand from the pocket in her robes.

Except just as she was about to fish out her wand after fumbling to pick it up a few times, a lady in a pink cardigan walked up to the table with a sickening smile, causing the entire great hall that was buzzing with comments to turn silent.

Her heels clicked loudly before they came to a stop when the lady reached Hermione and stopped in front of her.

She looked at Hermione and pinched her chin to pull her face in her direction, before moving her head around to examine Hermione's face like an item on a shelf at a shopping mart.

She moved Hermione's head around for a good minute before she looked around the hall with a calm gaze.

Hermione was about to pull up her wand and undo the obvious animated transfiguration spell Loki had used on the ink mask to either stop them by banishing them or just use the freezing cham to get them off her face without letting it stain her face or her fingers.

"It's alright professor Umbridge, I can deal with-" Hermione started but was forced to stop because Umbridge interrupted her.

"Mr. Loki. You will attend detention in my office at three in the afternoon today." Umbridge said softly, the silence in the hall allowing her high-pitched tone to reach Loki's ears clearly.

All the heads in the hall turned towards Loki who's brows lifted.

Loki turned to look at the teacher's table and found that the teachers were all frowning, clearly not wanting to get in between banter that was clearly between good friends.

Loki then scanned the faces of the students in the great hall and saw them all similarly confused, and so he voiced his own confusion.

"And please do enlighten me, Professor Umbridge, why am I going to have a detention with you? I mean, I know my company can be charming…but you can't in good faith to all the other pretty girls in the school carve some time from my schedule for yourself can you?"

Several students had to hold their hands in front of their mouths to avoid spitting food onto their benchmates.

A few even snorted hard enough for food to be pushed up into their nostrils.

Yet Loki kept his stern gaze fixed on Umbridge, with not a hint of a smile on his face as he did so, as if he hadn't just delivered a joke that had caused even Professor McGonagall on the side to laugh.

"It's alright Professor Umbridge, it was just a bit of fu-" Hermione started, but was interrupted by Umbridge once again.

"One is not allowed to use magic outside the classes in the halls, Miss Granger. You ought to know that. Aren't you a model Prefect?"

Hermione froze a little when she heard someone accusing her of breaking the rules as did the other Gryffindors who were suddenly looking at Umbridge like she'd done something impossible and worthy of being framed in the great halls of Hogwarts as a forever legend.

Had he not known better, Harry had the strong urge to stand up and clap at this miracle.

Umbridge then turned away and looked at Loki again-

"Mr. Loki, you will be attending detention today, if you don't I shall deduct points from Slytherin."

Suddenly, all the children in the hall started frowning, feeling that Umbridge was stretching this small incident to an extreme that none of them liked.

Although untold, it was always a rule at Hogwarts that as long as students didn't do anything too dangerous like breaking the laws about not messing around with the taboos of transfiguration and not hurting each other in any irreversible ways, it was alright to have a bit of fun.

What else were students going to do trapped in this otherwise bland castle? There were only so many times one could slide up and down the grand moving stairs or eat Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans as your friend tossed it to you while you were on your broom, it was why Quidditch was such a popular sport along with Arcadia Royale.

These things essentially allowed students to pass their otherwise academic days with a bit of fun and joyous tension.

Hermione frowned.

She knew that Umbrdige had stepped on a land mine and was going to instantly become heavily disliked if she continued on the path she was going, but feeling a little sorrowful because of her future hit piece on her in the Hogwarts Honest Mill, she was about to admit that she had done this to herself for fun.

Except-

"Mione. Don't do anything."

-Hermione heard Loki's voice whispering in her ears, she felt like the wind had carried his voice over to her and delivered the news itself.

Hermione's eyes widened not only at the remarkable magical spell involved in doing this, but also because she realised that Loki was doing this because he had a plan in mind.

Except she knew her hunch about his plan was rather crazy!

'He's going to use this to involve the Black house isn't he?'

Her eyes instantly locked on Loki and she saw him flash a bright smile before opening his mouth to speak directly to Umbridge.

Loki's tone was sweet, almost mimicking Umbridge's own while his smile was just as sticky as hers.

It was as if Loki had embodied Umbridge's spirit in that moment as he spoke the next words.

"Of course Professor. I understand that I have committed a grave error. I shall pay by attending your detention."

Everyone in the hall shivered at Loki's words.

For it not only made them feel like something terrible was going to happen to Umbridge, but also because Loki looked eerily like Umbridge herself in those moments. It felt like he'd pulled out her essence and distilled it to its perfect form before throwing it back at her.

Snape was the only one who smiled, however, as close to a smile as he could get, which was just a sneer.

Umbridge frowned but said nothing else and smiled quickly before speaking softly, "It is good that you understand, but since it took you so long, five points from Slytherin."

"Thank you Professor Umbridge for guiding the great Loki Black on the right track."

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