How Can You Become Immortal if You Keep Slacking Off?

Chapter 2



Chapter 2: Really, I planned well yesterday!

“By the way, why are you so concerned about cultivation matters recently?”

Hei Yang looked at Hongli suspiciously: “In theory, as fellow lazy dogs, shouldn’t we stay far away from such hardships? Could it be… you’ve been bribed by the Inward Spiraling Squad and betrayed the organization?”

“That’s enough.”

Seeing Hei Yang looking as if he had been betrayed, Hongli rolled her eyes: “I just, simply don’t want to die…”

“Huh?”

Hei Yang was shocked and quickly asked, “Has someone threatened your life? Tell me, I’ll take you and run.”

“Indeed, I have a terminal illness!”

Hongli said seriously.

“Oh no!”

Hei Yang’s pupils dilated: “Oh, I also haven’t learned medical skills. How about you persist a bit longer, and I’ll go to the medical clinic in the east to apprentice?”

“You can’t cure this kind of illness!”

“Really…”

Hei Yang couldn’t believe it: “Then, I’ll go to the coffin shop in the west to apprentice? I’ll try to make you a custom coffin… Hmm, what are your measurements?”

“Scram.”

Hongli sighed: “This illness is called Slow Oxidation Syndrome. If I keep breathing, I will slowly decay and die within a hundred years. It’s too terrifying! But if I cultivate, I can live an extra hundred years at the Qi Refining Realm, three hundred years after Foundation Building, five hundred years with the Golden Core, a thousand years at Nascent Soul… And then there’s the legendary Ascend to Immortality, which can completely cure this illness, so no need to worry about dying of old age!”

“What?!”

Hei Yang looked shocked: “Humans can still die of old age?”

“?”

Hongli had a question mark over her head: “You’re afraid of having a serious illness. If you don’t die of old age, do you live forever?”

“I always thought that was a rumor.”

Hei Yang shook his head and reasoned: “Think about it, if it were true that humans would die of old age. When two people create a child, they amalgamate into one person, plus various natural disasters, conflicts, diseases, accidents, children dying young… Over time, shouldn’t the human population slowly decrease? But reality isn’t like that, so I guess it’s a rumor! As long as we peacefully lie at home, we can live on forever!”

“??????”

Hongli was filled with question marks: “After giving birth to a child, can’t I live a few more years according to your calculations? Why is it that in your calculation, after the child is born, the parents have to offer sacrifices?”

“…”

Hei Yang suddenly became expressionless: “Sorry, I rushed out today and forgot to bring my brain.”

“That’s understandable.”

Hongli nodded: “After all, occasionally not being able to see such small things is quite normal.”

“You’re cursing me, right?”

“Please don’t jump to conclusions.”

“Alright, I’m going back for the herbal bath, not fun.”

Hongli jumped off the stool, stretched lazily, revealing a graceful curve. It was only at this moment that Hei Yang realized his good buddy was actually a girl!

“Mom, I’m back.”

Hei Yang entered the house and greeted his mother at the door, while she was directing the maids on what to do. Hei Yang didn’t care. As for his father, at this time, he should be helping to handle the city affairs in the City Lord’s Mansion. Ignoring his mother’s expression of “Why are you back so soon,” Hei Yang knew she had intentions of matchmaking him with Hongli, but he wasn’t in the mood for that now.

He locked the door, skillfully added various herbs and hot water to the wooden tub in the center of the room.

Watching the medicinal properties dissolve, Hei Yang didn’t care about the water temperature and directly took off his clothes to immerse himself, feeling waves of heat rising from the top of his head.

Hei Yang didn’t intend to stew himself; he was taking a herbal bath – in this world full of abundant spiritual energy, families like the Hei Family would start using these herbs to temper their children’s bodies from childhood.

Although very weak, he could indeed feel that these valuable medicinal herbs were regulating his body.

“But even with conditions, they are still mortals.”

Hei Yang sighed, the exchange with Hongli today made this talented 16-year-old youth have a little fear of death.

To be honest, Hei Yang had actually experienced death once before. In his previous life, he lived in a modern society with advanced technology and extraordinary powers that were not obvious.

Coincidentally, in that world, he also died at the age of sixteen due to an accident. It was later when he crossed the Naihe Bridge that he mistook the Meng Po Soup for mouthwash…

(https://id.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sup_Meng_Po)

Hei Yang was unsure if he would still be able to reincarnate with memories intact after death in this life. Perhaps in this world of cultivation, it was normal to be beaten to the point of soul dispersal!

Moreover, Hei Yang still remembered how Meng Po was furious and cursed loudly at that time: “You brat, next time I catch you, I’ll make you drink a whole barrel of soup!”

At that time, Hei Yang secretly mocked the old lady because why would he be so foolish to fall into her trap voluntarily? But if he were to die again in this life…

“Hiss!” Hei Yang couldn’t help but take a sip of herbal bath and immediately spit it out, “No way, that old lady looks quite old now, she should be retired… And, I’ve already transmigrated, so she shouldn’t have authority over me anymore…”

For a moment, Hei Yang felt that life was bleak! He wanted to enjoy life, but he didn’t want to die!

“So, do I have to start cultivating now?” Hei Yang felt like there were two little figures arguing next to his head.

One was his lazy self, and the other was his slightly less lazy self! “No, I want a happy life, I don’t want to strive in cultivation!”

“You don’t know how fortunate you are to have these conditions. Do you know how many people envy your situation? How many ambitious individuals have had to give up their dreams due to family circumstances? If you don’t cherish this opportunity, even if you reincarnate as a dog in the next life, you’ll still be lucky!”

“Then I’ll just be a lazy dog!”

“…”

“Damn it!” Waving his hand to dispel the two figures, Hei Yang sighed, “So it’s decided then. From today on, work hard… well, let’s start from tomorrow!” With a slight tug, he went to sleep!

“Xiaoyang, it’s already late, why aren’t you getting up!”

“Hey, Mom, I’m sixteen already, don’t come rushing into my room all the time, it makes me feel very insecure! And besides, the rooster hasn’t crowed yet, why should I get up?”

“The rooster somehow disappeared, maybe those mischievous kids catching spirit chickens took it away. Besides, if I don’t come, do you just want to lie in bed all day?!”

“Well, maybe more than a day.”

“Stop being so cheeky, get up and practice your swordsmanship! Look at you, look at your eldest uncle’s female cousin, she’s already at the Body Tempering Seventh Level! I’m not asking you to catch up with your cousin who joined the Five Elements Sect, just compete with your cousin!”

“What’s there to compete about…”

“Not competing? While you’re not, others are. They join the sects, soar through the skies, turn stones into gold. And you? Holding a handful of earth in a hundred years?”

Under the hopeful gaze of his mother for her son to succeed, Hei Yang was reluctantly pulled out of bed, took the wooden sword for practice, and pushed open the door.

“Swish, swish, swish!”

The chilling north wind poured in, instantly making Hei Yang alert, “Mom! Why didn’t you say it snowed last night! Look, it’s still snowing, how can I practice swordsmanship in this!”

“You locked the door as soon as you went inside yesterday, so who could come in and tell you it was snowing? Didn’t you notice your dad hasn’t come back, he’s staying directly at the City Lord’s Mansion.”

“If I lock the door, can’t you still open it?”

“Hey, this is to give my son a sense of security!”

“Mom, stop being so cryptic…” Hei Yang sighed, already ingrained with the sword moves, basically just simple slashes and cuts.

For more than ten years of basic training, as his mother said, it was “undaunted by wind and rain”!


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