Honey, Why Can’t We Get a Divorce?

‘I have a second plan.'

Actually, I didn't want to do this. But I had to. Because Ophelia is an evil woman.

‘Mistreating the servants.'

Inhale, exhale. 

I took deep breaths. The Duke of Sylvester was known to care about the servants of the castle, he even knows all of their names. Which means…

‘If I bully them, I'm sure I'll get in trouble.'

If I mess with his beloved servants, wouldn't he scold me? Which would then lead to a divorce!

‘So I have no choice but to do it.'

I took another deep breath and opened the door and strode towards the maid cleaning the hallway.

"Hey."

"Y- yes, ma'am?"

Ignoring the startled maid, I swept the railing with my finger, gray dust sticking onto them. "Look at how much dust is still here."

“Oh!” The maid's eyes looked as if they were going to pop out.

"I-I'm sorry, I was careless."

"You were careless, you said?"

‘I'm sorry. I’m sorry, unknown extra.’ I shut my eyes tight and kicked the bucket filled with water.

Cak! 

Dirty water poured onto the polished hallway.

"Wipe it again."

The maid's mouth opened wide.

Badump, badump. 

My heart was about to burst, but I can't show it—I’m an evil duchess after all.

"Go on, I’ll watch until you finally do it right." Nothing is worse than having to see your boss at work, so I glanced down at the trembling maid with my arms crossed.

The maid clenched the mop in tears. "I- I'm sorry, I will clean it up quickly."

Seeing her, my conscience ached.

‘Am I really allowed to do this?’ I felt guilt rise up in me.

It was then. 

"Madam!" The butler, Oliver, came running. "W-what's going on—!"

He swallowed and breathed in, I wonder if he was that surprised at what I had done, so I raised my chin pretending to be fine.

"Why, am I not even allowed to educate the maid?"

Badump. Badump. 

My heart started beating hard again; if the butler opposes me, there would be a commotion, and if there’s a commotion, the news is going to reach Sylvester, and I'll finally be kicked out!

Please get angry! Get angry at me, Oliver!

I opened my eyes bigger as if I was challenging him.

"No, that's not the case at all!"

Oliver raised his two thumbs up and applauded.

"You did a great job!"

‘W-what?’

"This child must have been cleaning the hallway with dirty water because she was too lazy!"

"I apologise!"

‘This is not right—?’

The butler looked at the maid's face and breathed a sigh of relief. "You’ve been disgraceful, and you’re even completely clueless of how lucky you are right now!" 

"…What?"

"Madam, you didn't stab the child's eye like you did last time!"

‘Was I that bad?!’

"And before that, you made her take a shower using a mop!"

‘Ophelia, you—?!’

"But this time, you simply spilled the water… You handled it very well, Madam."

He looked at me. "I think I might be tearing up."

‘No, I think I'm the one who's going to cry… Ophelia, How the hell have you lived?’

Now, ‘Operation: Torture the servants’ has been removed because I failed. Badly.

******

We only have one last plan.

No matter how evil Ophelia was, I don't think she could have done this. This is something that would destroy Ophelia's pride.

It's called, 

"Stealing money."

If you're a Duchess, you should definitely steal your family's money. It's normal to steal money and spend it on a man. 

‘But I can’t meet a man now.' 

And there won't be a man to meet me. My notoriety has already been spread all over the country.

Moving on, I was in the Duke’s study trying to take his money.

"It would be nice to steal something like a bill."

That way, Sylvester will be more embarrassed to find out later that a bill is missing, then I'll be one step closer to getting a divorce.

‘I mean, why the hell aren’t you giving me a divorce anyways?'

If I was him, I would have agreed without hesitation. I really can’t for the life of me read Duke Sylvester at all.

‘Well, we’ve never had a conversation either.'

But what kind of conversation can we have when he tells me to leave just by looking at my face? I almost get neurosis whenever I am told to go out.

I opened the drawer, and I saw a bunch of documents scattered inside.

"Is there anything useful here?" I rummaged through the drawers, flipping and turning the documents.

"Perhaps this is worth something—"

Then the door opened and Duke Sylvester came in.

He stopped and stared at me. The me that was searching through his drawers.

A thief caught red-handed was exactly what I looked like.

"What…" Sylvester's lips slowly opened. "What are you doing?"

I swallowed nervously, trying to pretend like I didn’t care. "It's exactly what it looks like—I was searching for something in your study."

"Why is that?"

"I was wondering if you had any money, but I’ve seen nothing so far. The Duke is a lot poorer than I expected," I said, doing my best to make Duke angry.

If he gets mad, he may agree to the divorce. However, my heart felt like it was going to explode from how fast it was beating. I’m very weak after all.

"You—" Sylvester's handsome face crumpled.

‘Are you going to yell?’

I closed my eyes and prepared myself.

"You’re finally acting as the proper lady of the house."

‘….What?’

"I see you've come to your senses."

‘No, what are you talking about?’