He Is That Guy

When we reached the officiant NPC at the far end of the hall, a scripted dialogue popped up.

[Father Gregorio: On this beautiful day, the groom and the bride stand before you to step into a happy future together.]
[Father Gregorio: In hardship or sorrow, in joy or delight, do the groom and the bride promise to always do their best for each other, and—]
[Father Gregorio: —do you swear to cherish and love each other sincerely from now on, just as you do now?]
I was sipping cola and skimming the lines when a system message rose above the chat window.
Please type one of the following in chat: “Yes,” “Yep,” or “I do.”

What a hassle. “I do” was too long, and “Yep” needed the Shift key. I went with the simplest: “Yes.”
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: Yes
[All] JolryeOwner: Yes yes yesss
[All] JolryeOwner: Yep
[All] JolryeOwner: I do
[All] Drink Some Water: What is this lmaooooo
[All] Haereun: Is he actually nervous or just going for the ultimate bit;
[Father Gregorio: I have heard the answers of the groom and the bride.]
[Father Gregorio: I bless your future and conclude the ceremony.]
[Father Gregorio: May the groom, Jeo Jolryeoyo, and the bride, JolryeOwner, be happy.]

Daaang—dang. The huge golden bell behind the NPC swung, fireworks bursting in tandem. A flood of system messages followed.
Achievement completed!
Achievement: Experience Marriage (1 time)
Family tab has been unlocked!
A new Title has been added.
Wedding-exclusive buff items “Wedding Ring” and “Necklace” have been granted. Wear both to receive an additional buff.
I opened my inventory; sure enough, there was a ring and a necklace.

‘Damage and EXP buffs? Not bad.’
The buffs were better than expected, so I equipped them on the spot.
Looked like Yu Chae did the same—at the same moment a shimmering halo flashed past us. Buff applied.
[All] JolryeOwner: Hyung, hyung—
[All] JolryeOwner: Change your Title too!

He switched his to “Jeo Jolryeoyo’s Bride” and urged me.
So mine would be “JolryeOwner’s Groom”? …Yeah, not loving that.
[All] TheHunter: Is PvP allowed now??
[All] Hwa So-un: First strike, best strike!
[All] TheHunter: Are you out of your mind
[All] Drink Some Water: Take it outside
[All] Drink Some Water: ??
[All] Drink Some Water: Did you just hit me? — —
[All] Haereun: If you leave now,
[All] Haereun: You can’t come back in.
[All] ManaOing-nam: Kill the healer first~
[All] Hunting Madman: Filthy ranged players
[All] Let’s Play Pattycake: Wait—haha—hold up lmao
[All] Park Seungjin99: Potions allowed?
[All] Marinated Crab, Slurp: How dare you chug potions in this sacred duel
[All] Staeric: ngl just die, lol
[All] MelodyCode: Why are we included;;
[All] UnYum: hahahahahaha
[All] Sword Princess: Is this what usually happens after the wedding?
[All] SoeSoe: Oh shit, I jumped

[All] I’m Lagginggg: Whoa, Berserker; gimme a sec
Guests who’d restrained themselves out of basic courtesy started beating the hell out of each other the instant the ceremony ended.
Staring at the chaos, I sidestepped a flying white light-arrow with an evade skill.

[All] PureIntellect: Dude—
[All] PureIntellect: How are you dodging that?
[All] PureIntellect: Using hacks??
Hacks, in an RPG, really? I was about to ignore it out of laziness when—
[All] JolryeOwner: Hyung..
[All] JolryeOwner: Aren’t you putting on the Title? T_T
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: lol skill issue
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: You can do it too if you try harder ^_^

Alright. Guess I’m engaging. Perfect timing, PureIntellect.
[All] JolryeOwner: Hyung, the Title..
I ignored Yu Chae’s fixation on the Title and waded into the warzone. I weaved through incoming skills and started firing back hard.

[All] I’llCutYouADeal: Two Dark Mages—this is a mess, O.O
[All] Mocha Bread: I still don’t know every Dark Mage skill, lol
[All] Haereun: Same, haha
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: Summoner’s worse, what are you talking about
The swarm of summons around Mocha Bread made movement a pain. As expected, alongside Lancer, it was one of the easiest, strongest classes to raise.
[All] I’m Lagginggg: Save meee
[All] I’m Lagginggg: Why meeee T_T
[All] UnYum: It’s normal…
[All] UnYum: Berserkers tunnel one target, hehe
[All] GuGuOtter: Absolute madhouse, lol
[All] ManaOing-nam: Can’t even see who’s hitting me;

Crack! BOOM! KRAK! The map split, flames spread, lightning slammed down—effects flashing all over.
With nearly thirty players brawling in a cramped interior, tracking skill origins was rough.
[All] Haereun: Guys—
[All] Haereun: This free-for-all is fun and all, but—
[All] Haereun: Shouldn’t we give the newlyweds a congrats beatdown??
[All] Drink Some Water: Oh?
[All] I’llCutYouADeal: Facts
[All] MelodyCode: fr
[All] MelodyCode: I already have some feelings about the groom, haha
[All] SoeSoe: lol me too
[All] UnYum: I’m on the bride’s side, hehe
[All] Staeric: Almost forgot the congrats smack, hehe
[All] Marinated Crab, Slurp: Haereun’s brain is insane today
[All] Marinated Crab, Slurp: Harvard?
[All] Park Seungjin99: You’re just a bird, actually
As the brawl raged, everyone suddenly focused on me and Yu Chae. Spotting Yu Chae standing there spaced out in the back, I hurried to cover him and typed:

[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: Dogpile? Really? — —
[All] Mocha Bread: Heh heh..
[All] Mocha Bread: Nice sightline, brother.
[All] TheHunter: Couples? Delete them.
[All] Drink Some Water: This is the chance.
[All] Drink Some Water: Hand over Yu Chae’s alt and we’ll let you go.
[All] MelodyCode: Time for revenge ^^*
[All] UnYum: Hearing there’s a low-level Twilight guildmaster alt in here…
What the hell kind of bit are they doing. I glanced at Yu Chae’s alt—silent like he’d gone AFK—and hesitated.
Even if it’s a game, ditching the bride and running right after the ceremony… that’s trash behavior, honestly.

While I wavered, I’m Lagginggg—impatient as always—was the first to rush in.
‘Wait, he’s charging me with that HP?’
He must’ve eaten a bunch of hits in the chaos; his HP was already at half. I easily dodged his skill.

Same with PureIntellect—why do Sharpshooters always brainlessly open like this. No need for any elaborate combo: I snared and dumped my hardest-hitting W-skill, and I’m Lagginggg couldn’t hold—collapsed dead.
[All] I’m Lagginggg: Huh
[All] Drink Some Water: What was that..??
[All] Park Seungjin99: You’re the bird, actually..
[All] I’m Lagginggg: First time fighting a Dark Mage, tbh;;
[All] MelodyCode: hahahahahahaha
[All] PureIntellect: I’m telling you Dark Mage damage is busted;
[All] I’m Lagginggg: fr.. feels weird?
[All] I’m Lagginggg: Jeo, are you hacking?
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: Why do you keep yelling hacks, lol
[All] Haereun: There are other guilds here;;
[All] Haereun: This is embarrassing.
[All] Drink Some Water: For real..
I could delete an over-eager I’m Lagginggg, sure—but the others were the problem.

We even had healer Haereun, tank Drink Some Water, and buffer DoraHeeImnida—there was no way I could win alone.
‘Yeah, running’s the answer, right?’
Bride or not, Yu Chae’s more of a veteran than me—why should I babysit him. I had just decided to bail and started to use a teleport scroll when—

BAM—THUD!
The hall doors, sealed since no one else could enter, burst open—and a familiar bastard strode in.
Golden chain at the hip, black robe over his frame. Yu Chae.

[All] Drink Some Water: ???
[All] TheHunter: Huh?
[All] Haereun: What—how’d the guildmaster get in here?
[All] Hunting Madman: Must’ve used a wedding invite.
Ignoring every greeting, Yu Chae just started whipping his chain like a madman.
[All] Drink Some Water: Ah
[All] UnYum: ?????
[All] I’llCutYouADeal: Holy shit, the damage
[All] Mocha Bread: ??
[All] Haereun: Gyaaaah~
[All] Staeric: O.O
[All] Hwa So-un: ah f— almost died
[All] SoeSoe: What hit me that I died instantly;;

The damage was so obscene that, aside from the tanky or quick enough to pop evades, everyone got swept by the chain.
In barely two minutes, after killing or putting about half the attendees into **Groggy (Stun)**¹, Yu Chae came over to me.
[All] Yu Chae: Hyung, party.
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: What the hell.
[All] Jeo Jolryeoyo: How’d you get in with that?

I opened the party invite window; he joined and answered:
[Party] Yu Chae: Two PCs.
[Party] Yu Chae: Hyung, send the request.
I sent the same link we’d used during the Dragon raid. Yu Chae stepped in close, arm around my waist. Then he wrapped his chain around a distant pillar and zipped us to the door in a single pull.

[All] Yu Chae: lol
[All] Yu Chae: cya
Still holding me, he used a teleport scroll. The two of us vanished together, and the guild chat and DMs exploded.
[Guild] Haereun: What was THAT????
[Guild] TheHunter: Hello?? You two can’t just leave;
[Guild] Drink Some Water: fucking hilarious lmao
[Guild] DoraHeeImnida: Romantic, hehe lol
[Guild] Staeric: What is this gay ending hahahahahaha
[Party] I’m Lagginggg: Gay ending, fuck lmaooooo
[Guild] Marinated Crab, Slurp: Looks like the groom ditched the bride and ran off with another guy, lol
[Guild] ManaOing-nam: gaaaay lololol
[Guild] Hwa So-un: Ah shit, should’ve recorded that—what a waste
[Guild] Park Seungjin99: hahahahahahahahahaha

[SoeSoe: What are you doing, seriously]
[SoeSoe: Your friend is lying cold and dead]
[SoeSoe: And you run off with a guy on your wedding day, cheating mid-ceremony, lol — —]
[MelodyCode: Beyond anything I imagined, fr]
[MelodyCode: Thanks for the live demo of cheating at your own wedding~]
God, what a mess. ⊛ Nоvеlιght ⊛ (Read the full story) It all happened so fast I barely processed it.

Before I could even ask what he was doing, we were already at Feroco Lighthouse. Only then did I notice Yu Chae’s alt had already logged out. When did he kill the alt and swap to his main?
[Party] Jeo Jolryeoyo: You were already on your main by then?
[Party] Yu Chae: Yep, lol
[Party] Yu Chae: Figured those bastards would go “congrats beatdown” or whatever.
[Party] Yu Chae: I still got there fast though, right? ^_^
He anticipated it and brought his main?

‘He really is a lunatic, huh?’
Even thinking that, I couldn’t stop laughing. Covering my mouth, leaning back in the chair, I thought for a moment and set my hands on the keyboard again.
[Party] Yu Chae: So, hyung—
[Party] Yu Chae: The Title?
[Party] Jeo Jolryeoyo: Kim Yu Chae.
[Party] Yu Chae: Yes?
[Party] Jeo Jolryeoyo: What’s your number?

 
¹ Groggy (Stun): A state caused by excessive shock; the target cannot move or act for a set duration.