Chapter 3
Chapter 3
9 p.m.
“So?”
Jiyong, who was particularly excited by my story, asked loudly.
“So you turned everything over? Did you beat all those kids up?”
"no."
"why?!!"
Why? Why do I have to beat everyone up? I was shocked and was about to ask again, but Chungyeon next to me asked more seriously.
“Did you kill them all or just kill one of them half to make an example?”
“No. I didn’t hit anyone, and I didn’t leave anyone half-dead.”
Stop. They both looked at each other in disbelief and asked at the same time.
"why?"
"why?"
No, what on earth do these people think of me...
“You left them alone because of the boss’s personality?”
“What’s my personality like?”
“What do you think, like a dog…”
"..."
“This is the most gentle sheep in the world.”
At this moment, I wanted to turn into a sheep of hell that would never exist again in the world. As I clenched my fist to throw Jiyong into the fire of hell, Chungyeon intervened.
“I really don’t understand, but did you really come from school without doing anything?”
"yes."
“President Kwon’s personality… No, that’s not it. Anyone would feel bad in that situation.”
“It’s bad. But it’s not so bad that it upsets everything. The bullying was less intense than I expected, so I didn’t really feel like fighting back.”
Mr. Chungyeon looked at me blankly and let out a hollow laugh.
“I heard President Kwon is cool in unexpected places.”
“It’s not because I’m cool.”
I stopped talking and frowned. I remembered my heart pounding as if I was afraid of being bullied by my classmates.
“Taekin can’t turn that kid over and kill half of him with his own body. He’s a complete idiot and his classmates are actually scared of what he does. He’s such an idiot that he gets bullied.”
Jiyong’s expression hardened at my last words. Mr. Chung-yeon also refuted it as if it was not true, but after experiencing the cowardly body, my thoughts became firmer.
“On the face of it, I’m annoyed by kids’ bullying, but how annoying is it that a damn high school kid is physically scared? It’s obvious even if you don’t look at it. He must have been trembling in fear when someone was bullying him, and he was even more upset and acting like an asshole.”
“But they’re all bullying me. There’s no one on my side, everyone hates me, but there’s no one who won’t be scared…”
“What’s wrong with throwing an eraser without saying anything?”
“That’s bullying. Many people ignore one person, laugh at them…”
"When you come out into the world, it's normal to be ignored and laughed at even more than that. How will you live later if you're so scared and trembled? Unless the kids in your class stole your money or beat you to death, you should just ignore this and live."
So, thanks to you, I slept very well. The guys in my class completely ignored me and didn't talk to me, but it was actually nice to sleep without being disturbed. The erasers kept coming until the end of class, but since I didn't respond in the afternoon, they probably got tired, so the frequency decreased. As expected, the problem was that Taek-in was an outcast. All this guy needs to do is change his mind, so why can't he do that...
“Not everyone is like the boss type.”
Jiyong muttered with a dark expression and left the office.
7 am.
I didn't want to go to school, so I packed my bag and was about to leave the front door when Taek-in's mother called me.
“Taekin, do you happen to not want to go to school?”
of course. Fortunately, the sense of insight she had honed while working in the business noticed her expression first and covered her mouth.
"why?"
“I texted with your homeroom teacher and you said you were lying down the whole time at school yesterday. Has anyone bullied you at school? Is that why you don’t want to go?”
"..."
“The teacher said if you’re not ready yet, why don’t you rest a little longer? Do you want to do that? Do you want to stay at home and rest a little longer?”
It was a very sweet offer. I almost nodded without realizing it, but luckily I didn't forget my purpose. Somehow find out the reason why he wanted to commit suicide and find a way to help him become self-reliant. At first, she thought her homeroom teacher was the right person, but after listening to Taek-in's mother, it didn't seem like she would be of much help. It felt like she was still more worried about Taekin getting into trouble at school. So who can help this coward to open his heart?
I saw Taek-in and her mother anxiously waiting for my answer. Her face is swollen from hard work, and her face is full of worry as she worries about her son. She had an accident and was worried that something might be wrong, so they sent her to the hospital, had her receive counseling, and had to work late into the night to skip work during that time. This is exactly what makes me angry at Taek-in. Shouldn't this bastard, seeing her mother suffering like this, wake up and tell herself to live right away? I could not sympathize with a person who only knew his own suffering and could not see the suffering of others, no matter how much he was the victim.
“No. It’s okay.”
She answered lightly and left the house feeling not at all okay. I really don't want to go to school. I'd rather join the military one more time... no, school is a hundred times better.
“Who is number 9? Number 9... Kim Taek-in.”
The name came out of the teacher's mouth after checking the student record. Oh fuck. Am I number 9? Isn’t there a person with the same name? I looked around with hopeful eyes, but Hakju, the English teacher who called number 9, was looking exactly at me.
“Get up and interpret it.”
I didn't even have my textbook open, so I asked my partner next to me.
"where are you?"
Of course, there was no answer. He even covered the book with his arm.
“Kim Taek-in, aren’t you waking up?”
All the other teachers don't say anything even when they lie down and sleep, but Hakju won't leave them alone. Now that I think about it, even when I was in high school, only Hakju would not allow me to sleep until the end. The old man is still a little clumsy. I grumbled, got up from my seat, and only then turned the pages of the book.
“Page 48, second paragraph.”
Thanks to the kind teacher, I was able to read 48 pages of alien language. he said... I tried to find a word I knew by scanning the sentence that didn't even have a period for 4 lines and that ignored the reader's lung health.
"He. Speaks. She. Now. Um.. Work. ... Um. Road. Go. ... Um. Her."
After finishing the analysis, I put the book down. I made eye contact with Hakju. At that moment, a familiar feeling of longing struck me. In the past, I faced the same situation as now. At that time, Hakju spoke to me with just those eyes.
'Have you ever seen a body like this?'
“Have you seen a body like this?”
Hakju spat out and frowned.
“Do you find this funny?”
Yeah, because it’s funny. I forced my mouth to not laugh and looked at Hakju.
"teacher."
"why?"
“I have memory problems...”
“That’s your problem. Since you came to school, you should have prepared in advance. If you don’t tell me everything you don’t know, are you going to live like that idiot for the rest of your life?”
“Isn’t it okay for even an idiot to have a way to survive?”
“You know. Even if you’re an idiot, there’s a way to survive.”
Hakju nodded his head and motioned to me.
"come out."
I had to lie down on my stomach until class ended.
Fuck you, Hakju. Everyone just leaves me alone, so why are you fucking Hakju? Oh my shoulder. My arms were shaking when I lifted the spoon to eat lunch. It was clear that the body of a high school student would lose even if it were to compete with a 100-year-old grandmother. Aren’t you really seriously ill? Otherwise, how could you possibly die like this after lying down on your stomach for 10 minutes? Also, why is the stomach so small? I only ate half of the rice I brought, but I was already full. When I was a student, I suffered from hunger even after eating five meals a day.
I forcefully ate all the rice I put on the plate and went to class. There was still some time left before class started, but the classroom was full of children moving around busily. Most of them were changing into gym clothes. Only then did I look at the timetable. 5th period, physical education. AC, annoying. You can't sleep during gym class. I had no choice but to change into my gym clothes. But there was a problem. Where are the gym clothes? When I looked around, most people were wearing smelly gym clothes out of their lockers. Ah, lockers. It was only then that I realized the whereabouts of the remaining textbooks that Taekin was missing. It must be there. But there was another problem.
“Hey, which locker is mine?”
I asked the boy nearby, but as expected, he didn't even seem to listen to me and left. And then I heard them talking about me behind my back again.
'what?'
'What kind of locker is yours?'
'I guess he really has his head turned to stone.'
No, it was originally a stone head. There was no reason to be angry about something approaching the Shinigami. Instead, I stepped back and checked which lockers the kids had tampered with and which ones had not. While Taek-in was trying hard to guess the locker, a text message came. I took out Taekin’s smartphone. From experience, it keeps coming to the point where it gets annoying if you don't look at it.
[Perverted bastard. Do you already feel like you’re in a bad mood since it’s gym class?]
what? I raised my eyes and tried to find the person who had sent the text. However, there were many kids with smartphones in their hands, and most of those who made eye contact with me looked back with disdain and annoyance. I replied for the first time.
[Who are you?]
[You idiot. Who wants to answer?]
I slowly looked around again and sent a text message.
[Byungsin is your mother’s name, and what is your name?]
“You fucking bastard.”
The person who sent the text walked in front of me, swearing. He was an ordinary-looking guy, about 180cm tall. Taek-in, who appears to be less than 170 cm tall, is tall enough to look intimidating. She wasn't interested in the kids in her class, but this guy's face looked familiar to her. She had to be like that because she was the class president who stood up and greeted everyone in class.
“Please let me die instead of someone who didn’t die with your own hands? Fuck, where can you get a bastard from talking nonsense?”
He got excited and raised his arm as if to hit me, but another guy who followed him stopped him.
“Hey, ignore it! What if that bastard gets framed for being your fault before he dies?”
“Fuck it, tell me to do it! All I have to do is expose that perverted bastard to the world.”
The class president swore more with a look that seemed like he was going to kill me, and was grabbed by his friend's hand and retreated. As he fumed and couldn't shake off his anger, several people patted his shoulders and comforted him. You endure it, ignore that bastard. I'm the one who was unilaterally criticized, so why does the class president look like he's the victim? When he turned his head, the eyes of his classmates got worse. I rolled my eyes as if I was looking at something dirty and disgusting. To attract high school kids.
I ignored their reaction and stood in front of what I assumed was my locker. There were about five or six lockers that the children had not touched, but this one had a different lock. Among all the lockers, it had a particularly large lock. It looked like the lock with a different number had probably been ripped off and replaced with a larger one. But no matter how big the lock is, all padlocks are there. It is easy to pick by picking if you have the right tools. Most of the class had left to get ready for gym class while I went back to my seat and looked for something to pick the lock with. Is there anything long and pointy?
“You really don’t remember anything?”
I looked up and saw my partner watching me from a distance along with the guy sitting right in front of me. Taek-in's partner and his best friend, who had a similar body type, were typical small-faced students who couldn't speak out among the hard-working group in their class. An ordinary group of people who just get along well and graduate without bothering anyone. Can you guys talk to me? I was about to ask again, but when I looked into the classroom, everyone had left and there were only three of us.
"Anna."
I answered briefly and walked to my locker. The two of them looked at me and whispered.
“See, it really doesn’t fly. Didn’t you see him do it to the class president earlier? He opened his eyes and looked at me telling me to hit him.”
“Well, since he came back from the dead, he must have been brave. And his eyes didn’t say that if he was going to hit him, he would hit him. His face was white and he was trembling, right? That guy was just pretending to have amnesia because he was embarrassed.”
Hey, hey, I can hear everything. It's not just high school girls, it's guys talking. Sweet. I picked the lock and opened the locker. Inside, as expected, were gym clothes and books. Having to do physical education is so annoying. I grumbled as I took out my gym clothes and looked to the side because something was strange. My partner and best friend were looking at me with surprised eyes. Why are you like that?
“Do you know how to pick locks?”
When Taekin wakes up, the first thing I have to teach him is something.
Every hour, I went out to the playground with a doctor's note that was in tatters because I had to show it to the teachers. In front of the students who were already sitting in the stands, a tall man who appeared to be a physical education teacher was standing holding an attendance sheet. My steps across the playground to the stands became increasingly heavy. This damn body. My teenage body was weaker than my 30-year-old self, so even though I was just crossing the playground, I was sweating and my whole body was heavy.
When this kid wakes up, I will call him to the gym and make him train for hours every day. Fortunately, I have a friend who is a gym instructor, so he can teach me cheaply and harshly. I arrived at the stand panting like a person crossing a desert. And only then was I able to see the physical education teacher properly. He was standing with his back to me as he was talking to the class president, but he was much taller than he looked from afar. Not only was he tall, but he was also well-muscled like someone who works out. Although the class president was tall, he looked like a child next to him. I think he's almost 190cm tall. I've never seen a body like that before, other than the guy I worked out with in my class in high school. But I couldn't just admire his well-built body.
Thump, thump, thump...
My heart suddenly started beating loudly. I was worried that my heart might jump out of my chest. My heart was so loud that I couldn't hear any other sounds in my ears. I was panting slightly while crossing the playground on a hot day, but I couldn't breathe properly, as if I had lost my proper function. What the hell is going on? Heat rose to my face. I vaguely realized that this situation was not clear. It was like a time when my heart was beating for a moment in the teacher's office, apparently in the teacher's office. It wasn't the heart that was beating coldly after being bullied by Van Adil, but it was pounding uncontrollably, like a runaway motorcycle. It was definitely not a feeling of panic or fear. Then what? Come on?
“Fuck, look at that pervert. He’s already drooling, drooling.”
A low curse was heard from nearby. When I turned my head, a guy who was close to the class president was glaring at me.
“What are you looking at? You disgusting bastard.”
Normally I would have said something, but now I couldn't open my mouth. My heart was pounding so hard that I had to press my hand against my chest. Is it heart disease? My doubts disappeared as a shadow fell over me.
“Kim Taek-in.”
The physical education teacher called the high school student’s name. For a moment, I felt angry and my face heated up. What, why are you like this? Embarrassed, I repeated this to myself and looked back at the person who called me. And my heart pounding got louder. For the first time, I began to believe that the human heart could explode like a bomb. She pressed her chest harder with her hand, trying to calm her uncontrollable body pounding due to shame or unhappiness. But the way out lay elsewhere. The moment she saw the face of the physical education teacher who, although not good-looking, was popular with the girls, cold water poured into her head.
“Huh? Dog Buddha?”
The gym teacher slowly looked up from her attendance sheet. He stared at me coldly.
"What are you?"
Well, he's a classmate who knows your nickname from school.
When I was in high school, I only slept around and had very few friends, so I don't remember anything in particular, but there is a guy in my class who left such an impression on me that his nickname popped out as soon as I saw his face. It was probably during my second year of high school. No, was it during your senior year of high school? Anyway, the dog that was in the same class was that kind of guy. The high school I went to was in a wealthy area, so it wasn't unusual for there to be one or two kids in the class who lived in multi-billion-dollar houses. I remember that all of them lived well, especially the Dog Buddha.
Of course I'm not. I was one of only two students in middle school who were sent to high school, so I just lived in a neighborhood next to a wealthy neighborhood. At that time, our class was divided into several groups like a typical high school class. There is a study group centered around the class president, a nerd group who is deeply into things like comics and music that others do not know, and a commoner group who just play games, eat, and watch porn. And he's the one who sits at the back of every class, talks loudly, and doesn't even listen to class.
Of course, this is the opinion of high school students themselves, and they are just one of two things: anchovies who are good at studying and anchovies who are not. Anyway, Gaebudbu was a member of the Iljin faction at the time. me? I am a non-existential person who does not know whether I exist or not. This school may be filled with well-off kids, but even though they were working hard and having fun, they were not a group of kids who took money from others or bullied them. Rather, it was a deviance such as going to expensive clubs that ordinary high school students could not even dream of, or driving expensive cars worth more than 1 billion won without a license. The reason I couldn't fit in when I got to high school might have been because I knew there were so many people in the world who were living well.
Dog Buddha was one of that group, but he wasn't very good at studying. I think I probably exercised, but it seems like it was an exercise that other people didn't do well. I thought you said you were going to hit a ball with a long stick? Anyway, in my second year of high school, the class president got into a fight with this group of guys for some reason. At that time, the class president's last name was Gye, so he was just called 'dog'. Perhaps because he was the son of a family that also had good dogs, he never got discouraged. I don't remember the details of how we fought, but the important thing is that we fought a bunch of dogs and talked about stone heads. He said that after graduating, an idiot like you will spend all his family money and spend it all in his later years and become his own driver.
Even I, who was trying to eat lunch at the time, woke up so irritated that I woke up. I thought there was going to be a physical fight, but then Dog Buddha appeared. When a guy who was taller than his peers and had a good body because of his sports skills appeared, the classroom instantly became quiet. Just as the final boss appeared, the paths he took diverged like the sea. Even the class president could be seen trembling in front of this guy. Dog Buddha's original nickname was simply Buddha, which was earned because he never got angry and smiled kindly. However, even Buddha seemed angry. When a normally gentle person gets angry, he becomes scary. Is the class president about to be beaten to death?
Contrary to everyone's expectations, he simply asked: What if you're smarter than us? Even though the class president was nervous, he smiled ostentatiously, and this guy also smiled. I threatened to not leave you alone if I found out that you were smarter than us. The class president scolded the whole time. If you hit me, I'll send you to jail. I still remember what the Dog Buddha said at that time.
‘I won’t hit you. You're going to chew it.'
The guy just spoke with an expressionless expression, but he had the whole class swayed. And at that time, the fight ended there, but a month later, we realized that the fight was not completely over yet. This guy, who was in the middle of the class, came in second place. She was class president and ranked 3rd. That day, she was praised and called the Buddha of Dogs, the Buddha of Dogs. But she didn't lose her class president. The next day he didn't come to school. Needless to say, he showed up at school two days later looking haggard and went to school like he was dead.
Other than that, Gaebudbu didn't cause any particularly memorable problems. Despite his size, this guy was really gentle like a Buddha. But why is he a physical education teacher at school? For an entire hour, the students were brutally and terrifyingly beaten, as if they were being rolled into the fiery pit of hell. Oh, Hakju was such a miserable student that I was told to go away.
9 p.m.
“Did you meet your classmate? That’s great.”
What's going well? I looked at the clueless Mr. Chungyeon in bewilderment.
“You can go to President Kwon and ask Taekin to take a good look at him.”
...Oh, I guess that's possible. But then I shook my head.
“We’re classmates, so we haven’t spoken to each other since school. He probably doesn’t even know who I am, and I can barely remember his face.”
“Still, we’re classmates, so if I go and tell them, won’t they take care of it?”
Jiyong joined in from the side.
“If it was that guy from back in the day, there might be a chance, but not now.”
He was harsh, cruel, and merciless. I frowned, remembering the person I saw in gym class today. We set a time limit and told them to run ten laps around the playground, but since the four guys who were weaker than Taek-in couldn't make it in time, the whole group had to run four more laps. For a moment, I wanted to bully those four guys. Of course, they were already bullying me, but I felt like my anger wouldn't go away if I didn't bully them too. I, too, came in within the time limit with Kim Taek-in's weakened body, but they lost their spirit, so in the end, I ended up running a total of twelve more laps. I just walked around the playground and the class ended. Thankfully, no one bothered me in the afternoon because everyone was passed out.
“Do you have a bad personality? As much as the boss hyung?”
“It was really bad. I remember him being so good-natured that his nickname was Buddha, but when I saw him today, he seemed to have changed a bit. He looked down on people from the look in his eyes and said he was going to kill you or something… But what? As much as me?”
Jiyong stepped back, avoiding eye contact. Chung-yeon came in between them and there was no time to scold them.
“As you get older, you realize that the world is not easy and you become more defensive. Don’t you think President Kwon will be different from when he was a student?”
“Well, it’s different back then. Still, it’s a bit weird to ask a dog to do something. Besides.”
I frowned and gave the most important reason.
“My heart was pounding. As soon as I saw the dog, I couldn’t breathe and my heart was pounding… Mr. Wow, don’t you know if this is a real illness? Unless it’s a heart problem…”
"also!"
“That was it!”
I stopped talking and looked at the two. Anyway, that was it, right? But maybe I was the only one who didn't notice, because the two of them were so excited talking about what they had found out.
“Hyung Chung-yeon, what did I tell you? I said you thought you were a pervert ever since you mentioned it, right?”
“You’re amazing. I thought it might be possible, but I didn’t believe it.”
“The lady at the lottery room said that the boss hyung and Taek-in had something in common. That’s where I immediately noticed.”
“Well, since we have that much in common, the soul can enter the body.”
Drurrrr~ The two people stopped talking and turned around at the sudden noise. Then I realized that I had a crowbar in my hand to open the wooden box. Grumble. I dragged the crowbar back to the floor and made a chin gesture.
“Keep bullying me.”
Unlike Jiyong, who flinched, Chungyeon soothed me when she smiled.
“Haha, no. I didn’t bully President Kwon...”
Jiyong quickly grabbed his arm and stopped him. Perhaps because he had seen me use this crowbar for other purposes before, he immediately sorted out the situation.
“As soon as I saw the president’s classmate, my heart started pounding, and after seeing the classmates call him a pervert, I knew what Taekin’s secret was.”
"what is that?"
“You really don’t know, boss? You said your heart was racing. His face was hot, right? He couldn’t even make eye contact?”
“How did you know? Is this a disease you know?”
Surely it's not an epidemic? Two people were worried about me.
“President Kwon, have you never had an experience like that in your life?”
“My heart is strong. What is it?”
“It’s love! Love!”
Jiyong seemed frustrated and interrupted. love? But why? When I couldn't accept it, Jiyong shouted again.
“Don’t you know? It’s unrequited love. L oh v y, love!”
The guy tried to convey his meaning by making the alphabet with his arms. Seeing him made me feel a little calmer. I can't believe that just because there's a word I know comes up.
“So you’re saying Kim Taek-in likes men?”
“That’s right. President Kwon doesn’t seem to know, but when your heart trembles like that and you can’t do anything in front of the other person, that’s love.”
“No way. So you’re saying that everyone in the world has a heart that moves like that?”
...I guess it's because I saw the expressions on both of their faces. Well, I don't understand, but let's move on. The important thing is that Taek-in is gay, and as the two people said, I could understand why the kids in his class called him a pervert and gave him particularly hostile looks during gym class. Anyone who looks at Taek-in's behavior can tell that he likes his physical education teacher. I understood everything up to this point.
“But what do you mean by commonality? You said that me and Kim Taek-in have something in common.”
Ah, that's... Suddenly, both of them avoided eye contact and froze. This bothers me more than the fact that Taek-in is gay. Grumble. I pulled the lever.
“I was just saying that we had something in common because I had always suspected that my boss brother was gay too!”
Jiyong shouted and immediately stepped back. Chungyeon, who was next to her, also stepped back. As I was holding the lever in silence, an explanation was added in a low voice.
“The boss doesn’t like women. He’s never dated one, and even when he goes out drinking, he hates hanging out with women, and no matter how pretty a girl comes, he’s not interested at all.”
“So they’re all gay?”
It's not like that, but... Chungyeon finished behind Jiyong who was muttering.
“But since one of President Kwon’s friends is gay, we wondered if President Kwon might also be gay…”
What kind of bullshit is this?
“Who is my friend? Who is this gay friend I don’t even know about? Moon Ji-yong, you tell me.”
“...You know, there’s a person in good health who comes here often... He’s a gym trainer.”
“Hannamsu?”
Nod. Jiyong nodded, and Chungyeon also winked as if she was right. Is it because the shock came repeatedly? There was nothing surprising or upsetting about it.
“How do you two know something that even I, a friend of 15 years, don’t know?”
“Well, you don’t know because the boss hyung is dull. And even if there is something strange, he doesn’t care. But we can see it in our eyes. Just like the boss hyung, he is not interested in women, but he keeps setting his sights on men, especially the boss... hmm, special. “When I look at someone, hearts come out of their eyes and things like that.”
It is true that Namsu is not interested in women. Even when we went out drinking together, he was a guy who didn't hang out with women, so he was comfortable, so he often hung out with Namsu. But is it because he's gay? I picked up the phone, dumbfounded. Idol music was heard as a call connection tone, and after a while, I heard a familiar voice.
[Uh, Heechan?]
“Han Nam-su, are you gay?”
There was no sound on the other end of the phone. There was no sound from the store either. I don't know what Namsu's situation was, but the two in front of me had their eyes and mouths wide open in shock.
“Well, what if I ask you that now?”
Jiyong whispered in a trembling voice.
“I’m asking because I know now. Are you asking me yesterday? Hey, Han Nam-soo, can’t you hear me? Are you gay?”
[....Huh? What?]
“Can’t you hear? Our employees say you’re gay. Is it true?”
I saw the two in front of me close their eyes tightly. I wasn't interested in why they were doing that, so I focused on the voice coming from the other end of the phone.
[Suddenly, what are you talking about?]
“Jiyong Moon said you only show interest in men? And when you see someone special, hearts just come out in your eyes? Are you really gay?”
[....Hey, I have a guest. Let’s talk later.]
Suddenly, the phone was hung up.
“Ahh! What if I told you?! How scary is your boss’s friend!”
I ignored Jiyong’s nonsense and asked Chungyeon.
“So, this guy Kim Taek-in was bullied and tried to die because he was gay?”
“That could be true... On the other hand, the bullying was just bearable, but it could also be due to something else.”
What else? Chungyeon hesitated before answering my question.
“Unrequited love. President Kwon knows Taekin’s physical condition because he feels it right away. Did his body react to the point where he couldn’t stand it when his classmates bullied him?”
“No, it wasn’t that bad. Actually, I was scared, but it wasn’t that bad, and I also thought it was strange. In fact, when I saw the gym teacher, my body became more unruly… Ah!”
It was only then that I realized what Chungyeon meant. But I couldn't understand it in my head.
“What does having unrequited love have to do with dying? Does it make sense to die from it?”
"Well, I don't think it's to the point of dying, but the amount of pain that each person accepts is different. If the despair is too great because you can never be with someone, maybe Taekin can't accept it because he's still young?'
Still, it doesn't make sense. Just because you like someone. All you have to do is just give up. The person who gave me advice on this matter was Namsu, who rushed in 30 minutes later.
“Han Nam-su, what are you doing at this hour?”
Since the gym ends at 12 o'clock, he usually goes to the store early in the morning. But it’s not even 11 o’clock yet? As soon as Namsu came in, he took a deep breath and immediately looked at Jiyong. Jiyong's face seemed pale, but it was probably because of the lighting.
“Welcome. Moon Ji-yong said you were gay. Is that true?”
Suddenly, Jiyong glared at me as if he was going to kill me. Why is it like that? Namsu asked me, still looking at Jiyong.
“I came to talk about that. Do you have time?”
“About 20 minutes. I have to go to the auction.”
"Okay."
"sit down."
huh. Namsu answered and sat far away from me. Meanwhile, Chungyeon, whose expression hardened, spoke softly.
“President Kwon, we’ll go out.”
“Yes, go to xxx and check the truck that came from Gimje. I heard that xx Store is looking for goods today, so we will catch it.”
The two of them jumped out like bullets as soon as I finished speaking. As I looked at the employee working hard for a long time with pride, I noticed Namsu staring at them with strong eyes like mine.
“Isn’t it true that one of those two people has hearts coming out of their eyes because they like you?”
"no!!"
“Then it’s true that you’re gay?”
"..."
“Hannamsu.”
Namsu frowned with his eyes lowered.
"that is..."
“Just tell me if it’s true or not.”
After a while, I heard the answer mumbling. that's right.
“You bastard. You’re hitting a goal.”
Namsu lowered his head further. I hit the guy on the head.
“Hey, you idiot, I’ve known you for over 10 years. Do I really need to hear your important stories from someone else? Huh?”
I hit his head again and he finally raised his head and glanced up at me.
“You don’t feel bad?”
“I’m going to search. Fuck, everyone else knows, but I’m the only one who didn’t know? Do Lee Ji-hong and Shim Cheol-hwan know too?”
Fortunately, I didn't have to name all my friends, the guy shook his head.
“I didn’t say anything. But then again, you never know. I might have noticed.”
“No way. I didn’t know either.”
The guy seemed to have something to say, but then shook his head and asked:
“Are you not going to contact me anymore?”
“Why? Do you have any secrets again? Tell me quickly when you get the chance.”
“Nothing. I’m just… gay.”
“What is that?”
“Is it okay? You like men?”
“It’s nothing. But just because you’re a little weird doesn’t mean you’re not my friend, and you don’t have to harm me.”
“....I shouldn’t cause any harm.”
Namsu seemed to be frustrated with something, so he vigorously ran his hand through his hair and looked straight at me.
“Well, it’s okay. Well, Kwon Hee-chan has to be this insensitive. To be honest, I was worried about how you would come out, but this is so grateful that I want to bow down.”
“Try it. I’ll give you New Year’s money.”
He put down a mat, but instead responded with a curse. After lightening the mood with a weak joke, he asked me.
“Then why did you mention me? Did your employee say anything else about me?”
The guy asking the question seemed to have a lifelike look in his eyes, but Taek-in explained it simply, thinking that he had a harsh impression to begin with. Except, of course, that the soul comes and goes.
“Doesn’t that make sense? That he tried to die because of his unrequited love? But he wasn’t really scared of being bullied, so it doesn’t seem like he was going to die… I need to know the cause.”
“Even if I live downstairs, why are you helping me?”
"just."
I blurted out, looked into the air for a moment, and added.
“Her situation is similar to when I was in high school. My father divorced and left home, so my mother was the sole breadwinner, so she worked at a supermarket and restaurant from morning to evening. When I see that woman in the morning, her hands and feet are swollen. My mother is just like her. “I said so.”
"..."
“Anyway, what do you think?”
“Well... it’s painful enough to kill me. I can’t tell the person I like that I like them, I can’t even show it, and I can’t even dream of thinking about it coming true.”
“Really? Then you tried to kill Jinja because of your unrequited love?”
At that time, Namsu gave an unexpected answer.
“It might not be because of one thing. Neither unrequited love nor bullying are hard enough to kill, but when two come together, the weight may become unbearable.”
"is it?"
“Send that person to me. In that case, if you give him another goal, he will feel a desire to achieve and gain confidence, and he will get better. If you exercise, it will help you a lot. I won’t get paid, so send it to me.”
Money isn't the problem.
“He doesn’t want to move. You can’t change him. Don’t ask why, something needs to change on the outside so he realizes it. Damn, that doesn’t mean you can connect him with a gym teacher.”
“You don’t have to connect.”
what do you mean? When I asked, Namsu had a hollow smile on his lips.
“From my experience, the reason I was able to overcome a love affair that seemed like it would kill me was because the other person didn’t push me away and was able to see me when I wanted to see them. Then, I slowly became ready to give up. Well, I couldn’t give up completely.”
“Who the hell did you like and how much did you like? Hey, you should have told this brother sooner.”
The guy just smiled bitterly again. I felt sorry for not knowing about my friend's troubles for a long time, but fortunately, it seemed like he had overcome it now. The problem is Kim Taek-in. Miss, if this goes on, shouldn’t I be calling a classmate I haven’t spoken to before?