Growing Lilies

Lily in fact did not know where the harbor was. She reached the shore with ease. All she had to do was head vaguely west and slightly north. She knew the basic layout of the geography well enough to do that much. But once she reached the shore she realized she didn’t actually know which direction to follow it. Surely, following it would eventually lead to a harbor. But would it lead to fire first?

She decided she had no choice but to get out of the car and head down to the water to get a better look along the coast. Fortunately, it was just down a couple sets of stairs along the cliffside. Unfortunately, her knee was still aching from her fall this morning. It wasn’t as bad as it had been, but the thought of climbing another couple flights of stairs was miserable. Especially because she was already exhausted to the point of concern. But, she didn’t have access to a GPS, so this is all she could think to do.

The trip down the stairs wasn’t so bad. She even only needed to go half way down to see what she wanted to see! There was a harbor not that far away! But, it wasn’t all good. From the oceanside view she could see how the fires had spread way better than from any other vantage point. They’d reached the coast in multiple locations, and the forested mountains behind the city were also ablaze. The fire was very much still spreading, and there were areas of the city that looked entirely cut off. Further, the harbor wasn’t that far away from one of the blazes.

The words from her phone this morning rang in her head. “Better get moving. I really shouldn’t have allowed myself to move so slow…” With that, she started up the steps. It was a struggle. She knew it would be. Her body was just worn out at this point. When she was no longer in danger, she was going to need to take a nice long rest to get her stamina back up. Not to mention, she was certain she’d be sore for days after this. But, she had no choice but to keep going. So she did. When she finally got up to the last step, she let herself fall forward onto the ground and lay there for a minute to catch her breath. But, that was all the rest she could afford. So soon she was back in the car and headed towards the harbor.

Her anxiety started to rise in her chest as she drove towards the smoke. Especially when she started to smell it pretty heavily even inside the car. But, she had seen from the shore that the harbor hadn’t been swallowed up yet and the path to it looked clear as well. So she continued forward. She knew she had to be close by. It’s not like it was a mirage. They didn’t even work like that! She pressed on. And on. And on. Soon, she could see a bit of smoke in the air. Things were just a little hazy. But, she knew the harbor was fine. And if she could only get there and get out into the water she’d be safe.

“I just need to drive this car through a fire that’s engulfing a whole city, to get to boats I don’t know how to drive, and use one of them to get to safety. Yeah. Not a big deal. I’ve got this. I parked in a red zone today. On purpose.”

For once her attempt to lighten her own mood worked, at least a little bit. So she continued talking.

“Not only that. I left my apartment today. I broke into a house, and two stores. I committed grand theft auto. I fought a ferocious beast and spared it after I won. I– I can do this. It’s only a little more. The fire has been here the whole time. I’m just confronting it more head on now. Yeah. This is the final boss. I’ve leveled up. There’s nothing left in my way!”

Feeling re-energized she sped up a little. A couple seconds later she slowed again. Well, she wasn’t going to drive recklessly. Although, she probably did have reason to not observe the speed limit quite so strictly. As she rounded the next corner, there it was. The harbor. She turned onto the little road that led down to the docks and right into the closest parking space. Instantly she realized that unloading her stuff into a boat was going to be a pain in the ass. She should have brought a wheelbarrow or something! Oh well, no time for that now.

So, instead she focused on the task at hand. She needed to find a boat. The boats in the harbor ranged from simple speed boats to bigger personal yachts. Her first inclination was to find the most ritzy boat she could. Maybe it would have electricity, or a bed, or a bathroom! Even a kitchen? Some of the boats looked big enough.

Getting herself excited she approached the first one and walked up the deck and onto the boat. The first thing she noticed was that she was not particularly accustomed to the movement of the boat in water. It threw her off immediately. But, she steadied herself and continued forward. The second thing she noticed was that the door to the inside of the boat was closed. With a feeling of growing apprehension she approached the door. She grabbed the doorknob and… locked.

“GOD FUCKING DAMNIT! How come so many people cared so much about keeping people out of their shit?! You’re still screwing me over as ghosts you god damn 1% motherfuckers!” She screamed. She hit the door with a fist and instantly regretted it as pain blossomed down her arm. “Owwwww. Fine! I don’t want the nice yacht anyway. I’ll settle for second best!”

She stomped down the ramp and down to the dock again, and went over to the second nicest looking yacht in the harbor. But, she was confronted with the same issue. Her heart sank. “Wait. If I need keys to even get into the boat… oh shit. Oh no. Oh I’ve made a big mistake.”

She would need keys to start a boat too, wouldn’t she? Her confidence faded in an instant. If she couldn’t get a boat, what could she do? She looked back, and saw the fire growing increasingly closer. “What am I gonna do…?”

She stood frozen, trying to push down the panic creeping up her spine and into her chest. Was it time to run, and find another plan? Or did she keep trying to find a boat with onboard keys? Maybe some of the smaller ones had one of those pull cord starts? She was less certain she could drive one of those but it would be better than burning. She wasn’t going to make it. She had to leave. She had to leave right now.

She made a dash to the car, got inside and pressed the button to start it. She flipped it into reverse and pulled out, driving up the short road that led out to the main city and saw the worst thing she could have imagined. The fire had continued to spread. She could see that if she tried to go down that way, she was cut off. She stopped.

She was going to lose it. She was going to die. To burn to death in agony because she didn’t think to wonder if boats needed KEYS. She couldn’t do this. Of course she would die on day one. She was so fucking useless and helpless all the time. How dare she think she could grow at all, or rise to this challenge. She should just stop. Just stop right now. Lie down. Close her eyes. Let the fire overtake her. She was done. There was nothing to do.

“I should have just stayed in my apartment. I’m just not suited to live in this world. I shouldn’t have tried so hard. I always, always fail. It just hurts more to try.”

She cried. She cried so, so hard that she couldn’t even see. She couldn’t breathe. The tears and snot ran down her face, and she couldn’t even smell the smoke through it anymore. The inside of the car was beginning to heat up a little. She had an all over feeling like the charge in the air from a storm. But she just kept crying. There was nothing to do.

“Please. Please. Anyone. Please come save me. Please help. I can’t do this alone. Help me. Help me. Help me. Help mehelpmehelpmehelp–”

She was interrupted. Her phone’s alarm was going off.

“...huh? Huh? Huh?”

She wiped her tears away as best she could and reached into the back to drag forward her little luggage carrier. She pulled out her phone and looked at it.

7:48 PM - “Meet me at the docks bby ;)”

She stared at it in disbelief. She was so shocked, her tears stopped.

“What…?”

Well, there was only one thing to do. She turned around, and drove back down to the docks. She didn’t see anyone. So, she got out of her car. “Hello? Is anyone there?” Nothing. Of course. So, she continued forward a few steps. “Were you trying to help me? Who are you? Please say something!”

She could hear the fire now. Smell the smoke on the wind. Well. She was already here. Might as well look to see if there was even a rowboat she might be able to preserve her life with, even if it meant dying at sea instead of burning alive. Drowning was supposed to be better than fire, right?

It wasn’t hard to find what she was looking for. A small boat with an engine that looked like it started with a pull cord. She’d seen boats like this on TV and stuff, so… maybe she could make it go? But, it didn’t have much room at all. Could she even fit a few days worth of food and water on it just in case? Well, maybe. Though she wasn’t confident in her ability to toss it down onto the boat accurately from here either. It was only about a 3 foot drop, but something as unwieldy as her cooler might not work…

She should just give up. Give. Up. It isn’t worth it. So what if she survives tonight? She couldn’t make it through ONE DAY. It was time to give up. Lie down and die like the worm that she is. The world clearly doesn’t want her, so she should just stop exis–

Her phone alarm was going off. “Oh what is it this time you liar?” she shouted while she whipped it out.

7:54 PM - “Behind you! <3”

An overwhelming sense of dread filled Lily in an instant. She startled and spun as fast as she could, hands raised for a fight! No one was there. But… there was a boat. A large boat. It was similar to the first yacht she’d tried. But this boat definitely hadn’t been there just seconds ago. She KNEW it hadn’t.

“What the fuck is happening? Am I going insane…? Yes. That… that must be it.” She walked carefully over to the boat. She touched the ramp with a foot to make sure it was solid before stepping fully down on it. Up the ramp and onto the ship. “Huh. Uh. Hello? Who is doing this!?”

There was nothing but silence. So, she approached the door that led into the cabin and below area, and grabbed the handle. There were keys in the lock. She turned them, and it opened right up. The lights were on inside. “Hello? Is there anyone here?” No one answered. “I’m going to get my things! Please don’t disappear! Please!”

She turned and started down the ramp when she saw.. A little transportation dolly. It was long and flat, and on wheels and had a handle. She was too shocked to feel anything anymore. So, she simply grabbed it and walked down to her car. She opened it up, and loaded everything onto the dolly. Pushing it was a little hard, but not a lot of what she had gotten was particularly heavy. She had a little trouble pushing it up the ramp, but it went up.

“Hello? Thank you. Whoever… whatever helped me. Thank you.”

She pushed the dolly into the cabin, and found the captain’s chair. She wasn’t sure that’s what it was called, but whatever. She reached to put the keys into the console and closed her eyes for just a moment. “Please. Please work.”

They did. The engine roared to life with no difficulty. There was a wheel, and a throttle that could go forward or back. Windows that would allow her to see around the outside, and even some cameras that displayed on the inside via screens. It didn’t… seem too complicated. Aside from generally making sure not to run into anything. So, she pulled back on the throttle very very lightly. Sure enough, the boat moved backwards slowly.

Lily let out a nervous overwhelmed ‘hah’. “Okay. I. I can do this. I just have to be careful.”

In the central harbor of Santa Del Mar, a city engulfed in flames by the sea, a single yacht pulled out into the water. It was moving very slowly, and clumsily. But it was moving. From the haze of smoke from the inferno, it emerged out into the clear water, traveling perpendicular from the coast straight into the bay. The smoke obscured the sky in many places, and it had a bright red hue from the sun setting over the sea. Soon, it would be night time. But before that, a girl walked out onto the deck and found the anchor. It took her a few tries to get it to descend, but it was lowered by a sort of electric winch. She did finally get it to drop into the water, and let it fall for quite some time. She felt it when it hit the bottom. Satisfied, she pulled it up just enough so there was no slack in the chain.

“This should keep me settled, right? Right mysterious boat stranger helper? Wait, you’re not the boat are you? Like a sentient… boat? Talking to me through my phone?”

She was glad no one had been around to hear that. But she shrugged and made her way inside. The inside of the yacht was quite nice. It had electricity! She thought she saw some largish solar panels outside, but they were up high enough and she was tired enough that she didn’t feel like examining them right now. There was a comfortable looking bed. A small kitchen. A bathroom. The captain’s chair, and even a small living room area. With a TV!

Even a blu-ray player! She loaded her perishable foods into the fridge on the kitchen, and closed herself in the cabin. This day had been a nightmare, but she was finally, finally safe. She could relax. She climbed onto the couch in her little living area, put in a random disk from the box set of Friends that was close at hand, and watched half an episode before she fell asleep. The second she had stopped moving and working was the second her energy completely gave out.

Lily woke from a dreamless sleep. The title screen of her Friends disk was repeating the intro sting loudly. She reached up and turned it off, feeling miserable. After taking a second to use the bathroom, she decided to see if she could still see the burning city in the dark outside. So, she wobbled up onto the deck, and sat down. It was dark. It was so, so dark.

She looked around the sides of the ship, but she saw… nothing. Like she was floating in a completely empty void. It was almost relaxing. She could see a little bit of the light from the moon glinting out of the water. But there was no other light to be seen. Not from shore. Not from the sky. Nothing. It must be all the smoke cover.

So, she laid down for a minute, and watched the sky. The sky had been a lot of things to her over these last twenty four hours, and now she suddenly felt like she was floating in it. The most insignificant spec of dust in existence. Floating in an abyss the size of the universe with only the moon to keep her company or give her any idea of scale.

Wait. That… wasn’t right. She woke up a little more, her mind struggling to turn. Something was off. She could feel the gentle rocking of the boat underneath her, so she wasn’t in the air or something. What was it? She looked at the moon again. The moon.

The visible moon. With no smoke obscuring it. That can’t be right. How could she see the moon? How could–

“Oh god. No. Nonononononononono. I’m just being stupid. It’s an illusion. Something is– Something is happening.” But she knew it was real.

She stared up into the sky. The perfectly cloudless and smokeless sky, without the lights of the city to drown out the view.

In that perfectly clear inky abyss there was not a single star in sight.

“Hah. I really am going insane.”