54. Gods and Idiots
The most important thing I could do, I decided, was to buy supplies in town and transfer them over for Raine. That included bedding, food, and (now that I knew such a thing existed) whatever I could get of those medicinal pills that Ulia had given me, although to be honest I didn't even know where to start with that.
The best I could get for bedding under the circumstances was a bedroll and a big woolen blanket, plus a decent pillow. I hadn't really put a premium on comfort for my room, and with Raine exhausted, I worried she would get sick. It was a far sight better than hiding in a rain-slick crack in the wall behind the waterfall, but nowhere near good enough for guests.
Fortunately, I had the money, and with my stay at the Temple I had not been dipping into it at all. Still, as I passed over the last of the bedding, which I'd bought from a blond-haired man with a short but poorly trimmed beard, I couldn't help but hope for better. I didn't exactly have the soulflame I needed to just make things, though.
When I decided to spend my time with the Avatar, though, I realized with some paranoia that there were people watching me squatting in the alleyway. As much as I wanted to just find a quiet place, I worried that my mortal body would get attacked or robbed while I was busy. I wasn't sure I wanted to go back to the temple, yet... but I started walking that way on autopilot while fussing with Raine.
The blankets and bedroll helped, I could tell. I had to pick her up and awkwardly place her inside, taking off her boots in the process, but she seemed a lot more comfortable afterwards. The bedroll itself was just a kind of thick blanket sandwich with a thinner outer cover that was waterproof; the topping blanket I'd gotten for her was nowhere as thick as a proper comforter, but it would keep her warm in the cool cavern. In any case, she stopped shivering and seemed to be getting proper rest, which was all I could ask for.
This close, I could also sense Tammy's spirit. I wanted to ask her questions, but Tammy gave me the impression that she was now too closely tied to Raine to act independently; if I asked her questions, it would make it harder for Raine to rest, because the spirit--Angel, I guess--would have to draw on Raine's mind. Under the circumstances, rest was more important.
Once she was situated, my next order of business was to get back in touch with Alanna... but she refused the contact. I mean, she said "later" after our last meeting, and presumably she was planning on talking when she could... but under the circumstances...
I let out a growl of frustration as I walked, not really sure what I could do next. Over and over, circumstances left me feeling like I was the one with the least agency here. Even Raine, if she were awake, could at least tell me whether Murn was aware of the threat--or Tammy should have been able to. Alanna, the mysterious Patron, the people from the Order, Ciel'ostra... everyone had information I needed and I couldn't ask any of them.
So I ended up on the bridge looking out over the city, contemplating going back to my stupid little shut-in room at the temple, but not wanting to do that yet--I was hoping to get warm food for Raine if she awoke, without having to use magic to keep it heated. Actually, now that I thought of it, maybe I could build a fire in the room to keep it warm...
"You have the look of someone who is in trouble," came a voice, and a huge hand laid itself on my shoulder. I turned to find Xechi, a giant maul carried over one shoulder, with a much smaller woman perched cheerfully on her other shoulder, eating a small bit of fruit.
I... was not expecting that?
"What is wrong, Ryan of Eyes?" The bear woman stepped to one side and leaned against the wall without giving the woman on her shoulder any reason to fear for her balance. It wasn't clear to me immediately how the two of them maintained that act so easily, but it sure did look like they practiced a lot.
"I, uh... can't really explain," I said, turning away from the two women. Odd as it seemed to me that the two were so... comfortable together, too many other important things were going on.
"Matters with your god then. Tell me about him, if you would. Not much has been said about this God of Eyes as a person. You mentioned what he does for people, but... he could still be good or bad." Xechi paused. "Oh. This is Muir. She and I grew up together. She saved my life several times, and I am forever in her debt."
Muir snorted, but didn't offer any words, not even of greeting. I looked at her for a moment, then shrugged.
"...I don't know," I said, turning to look out at the city. What could I say? I wasn't in the mood to make up lies off the top of my head, and I hadn't thought about these things yet. "I trust him with my life, and I always will. He hasn't asked me to do anything awful, and I don't believe he ever will. But... his goals, his future, his past, a lot of things aren't clear to me right now. I know he wants something..." and here, I decided I just needed to vent my frustrations, "...but I feel like a pawn in a larger game. Right now there are a lot of people that all know some part of what is going on, but none of them are here to answer my questions."
"You mean like, why are you here helping at the Temple of Blades?" Xechi gave me a grin, but it felt a little... shallow. Was she trying to read me? "We are all wondering that ourselves."
"That..." I sighed. "I mean honestly I just assumed it was some kind of trade between the gods, maybe an alliance, maybe something less than that. But apparently nobody plans on telling me what's actually going on." Honestly, I still had no idea what Ciel'ostra had planned for me. I could guess--but it would be a guess. I hoped she wanted her replacement to have a peer, someone going through growing pains at the same time, but for all I knew she planned to split my head open and use me as a sacrifice to empower her replacement.
Well, okay, I knew it wasn't that--her book was pretty explicit about how using stolen Blood Flame was a thing she could never get away with, and I had no reason to think that she had ever tested that taboo. But that didn't mean that the situation was guaranteed to work out in my favor, not at all.
"So you don't think that they are hooking up?" Xechi's voice was, amused, but more subdued than I would have expected for such a joke. On her shoulder, Muir also gave a low chuckle, but it was muffled because she was trying to get a bit of fruit out from between her teeth.
I laughed, and not harshly. The Avatar of Ciel'ostra, at least, was attractive, and the picture of the high priestess was good looking enough, but I still associated the goddess mostly with Murn, who was not really my type. "I don't think so," I replied cheerfully. Just to be on the safe side, I added, "I doubt a Goddess like her would be interested in the God of Eyes. He's not exactly big, muscular, handsome." And, I decided, I was never interested in being that.
"Well, there is cuteness in those who need protecting too." Xechi gave her shoulder pal a grin. "After all, Muir likes me in spite of all my weakness, right?"
"You do have a sweet ass," replied Muir, examining the speck of food she had just picked from her teeth, with an absolute deadpan voice.
"There, you see?" Xechi beamed at me as though that had answered anything. "Maybe you are just here to facilitate a booty call."
I could not help but bury my face in the wall. I was caught somewhere between laughing and being too embarrassed to face the two of them, and still halfway trapped in a mood entirely too serious for this conversation. Between all those things, I was worried that I was going to say something stupid, but I managed to bite my tongue. "Well," I replied when I could keep a halfway straight face. "...maybe."
"Honestly your ass isn't too bad either," mused Xechi, as I continued to face the wall. "What do you think, Muir?"
"Needs more muscle. Gotta get those legs moving." Muir's voice was still even and unemotional, like she was discussing the weather. "Though I bet he'd look better if he was burying his face in--"
"Alright! Alright, enough." I turned back around and let myself slide down the wall. I knew my face was beet red and couldn't do anything about it. "I don't know how much more of this I can take."
"Not used to being flirted with? Prude." Muir's voice had just a bit of humor to it, so I thought she probably wasn't offended.
"He is a paper man. Not a lot of strong women will come on to a paper man, I think." Xechi knelt down in front of me. "The kind of women who do won't say exactly what they think. He is used to quiet women, subtle ones. Boring people."
Was this ever going to end? I stood up and was about to walk away when I felt Alanna calling me back. I froze, stock still, and turned to the wall, holding up a hand. "Hang on... god stuff."
I found Lucile in my Little God's Room, staring at Raine and Tammy. As I busted in, my mind still whirling with what was either very heavy-handed teasing or equally heavy flirting, Lucile hovered her hand over the woman, as though feeling the aura coming off of her.
She stood up after only a moment, turning to look at me. "She's okay?"
"I had to bring her to my Temple. She was attacked by a necromancer; I burned away the black flames in her body as well as I could, but... she should be okay for now."
"She was actually attacked by one?" I could see Lucile going rigid.
"I... don't know. I haven't been able to talk to her." I sorted through my head and pushed my memory of the black flame at Lucile. "It might have just been traps, attempts to catch her, or the enemy might have been trying to..."
"To locate her? Find exactly where she was taken?" Lucile's voice was hard. I could feel her mentally looking at the image I sent, but she dismissed after a moment, it as though it meant nothing to her.
I felt something inside of me grow cold. "...maybe."
"You idiot..." She sighed. "Fine. The Patron of the Order said you had time. Hopefully that was what she meant--that you had time to clear away the black flame before the necromancer was able to pin down the location of your as yet un-built, one and only temple, where your key is completely unguarded. Though exactly how she knows that much is beyond me."
I paused and looked at her. "Did you... say the oath?"
Alanna looked back at me for a long time, and I thought she carefully considered her words. "No," she said. "But once you said it I felt a memory, a locked up old thing. I could say the oath, but... I don't know why I would want to."
"Okay. Well, short version then. I suspect she can see anything in the world pretty easily." With her position in orbit, that much was obvious to me. I had no idea what technology nor magic she had, but the note itself had suggested that she had perspective; that might have meant a dozen sly things, from just being a comment on my position as God of Eyes, to a suggestion that she had heard my argument to those gods, which was all about perspective... but most likely, it was about her being in orbit, which I already knew.
"Okay, look, I don't care about that. If she said you had time, then she was confident that you did. If you acted fast enough, and if she was right..." Lucile paused. "...then you should be fine. If not, that Necromancer might come for you. If he's working with the enemy, he'll probably help slaughter our army, and then they'll invade. If he did mark your temple, he'll be coming for you, and you aren't strong enough to fight back."
I sighed. "I... want to build up defenses, but..."
"But you have no flame. I would offer you what I have, but I need it. Honestly, this whole thing about being goddess of knowledge isn't as profitable as it sounds. I have a bunch of enchantments set up to keep things secret, but many of them are for the greater good, and I don't get as much back as I put into them." She grimaced. "And then there was my fight with you..."
"Okay, okay, sorry." I paused. "I want to help you too, you know? If I could, I would. You've been nothing but good to me, and you've saved my life a couple times now. I just..." I didn't really belong as a god, did I?
"I get it." Lucile gave me a moderately hard punch on my arm, which didn't really mean anything in this place anyway. "If worst comes to worst, I'll talk to dad again, but I don't like doing that. I've been independent of him, and... I want to stay that way. As lonely as being a goddess is, I don't like being in anyone's debt, least of all his." She stopped. "You know he's ancient, right?"
"I know he's on the council, and was... in whatever that memory was." Xenma was not, of course, the other one in the memory who accepted the Patron's terms, and I didn't think he was the type to do so later on, either. "He must have been fairly old back then, too, right?"
"I think you're misunderstanding but I don't care," said Lucile, suddenly cross. "Look, this is serious. There are three of us in a relatively small area. If a necromancer does get your Key, the other two of us are going to be in trouble, and both the Lady of Blades and I have history here. Right now, the only thing that's holding you here is the Patron suggesting she'll build you a temple. If you aren't safe, you should leave."
I sighed. She was right, of course; there was a chance of me being in more danger if I left, but the chance wasn't necessarily higher than if I stayed where I was. But...
"Why do you think she is still insisting on meeting at a specific time and place?"
"There are any number of reasons. Xethram, you need to make a choice." Lucile looked at me. "I'll do what I can to help, but you are the one most at risk here. I can't fight a war for you, and ... the Lady of Blades doesn't owe you anything."
I stopped and looked at her. Lucile seemed a little annoyed, and distracted, but there was more to what she'd just said than that. "You didn't say her name."
The other woman made a pained face.
"You wanted to, but felt like you shouldn't. I feel the same way. But what does that mean?"
"It means she's preventing it. Maybe she's trying to stop the Necromancer from attacking her, I don't know." Lucile sighed. "My father does the same thing sometimes if he doesn't want to talk. It is a powerful binding meant to prevent magic from reaching her, and using a God's name counts as magic, in certain circumstances. Speaking her name here isn't exactly Truenaming, but it's close."
I didn't really want to think too hard about that. Instead, I reached my mental hand towards Raine, then thought better of it and moved over next to her as my Avatar. She was sleeping, and still seemed exhausted, but she was breathing more easily, seemed comfortable. I didn't sense any black flame on her, didn't sense that anything had changed. "She seems okay," I told Lucile. "Just resting."
"Let her." Lucile looked at the image of Raine in my temple. "What are you going to do?"
I shook my head. "I... have nowhere else, Lucile. I don't know anywhere else in this world. I'll be starting over again just as awkward and helpless as I was here, but maybe without two friendly goddesses as my neighbors. And how many gods are there in this world, anyway? How many might try to kill me? If I pick another location, will there be necromancers and rakshasa there, too?"
"If you have any advice on staying alive, I'll listen, learn, do whatever I can," I turned and put my hands on her shoulders, trying to get her to look me in the eyes, but she seemed busy somewhere else. "But right now this is my home. And I don't sense any necromancy left on Raine, no sense that someone followed up and is trying to track her. I want to try to fix this."
Lucile nodded, slowly. "I have work to do, but... I'll help you a bit." She paused, and offered just a tiny bit of gold flame, which floated up to the giant Me on the Cliff at the top of my Little God's Room. I did feel better, but I knew she also probably couldn't offer much more. "Oh... probably a couple days on the guys from the Order. Not positive on that, but it seems like it."
I nodded, and Lucile left, and I returned to my mortal body...
...to find that either Xechi or Muir had pantsed me, and the two of them were staring at my ass, while I faced the wall in complete concentration.
As I gave a yell and pulled my pants up, I heard a whole crowd of laughter behind me. Of course, this close to the Temple of Blades, those two had managed to make quite a scene. I looked around, but it was a whole crowd of people, none of whom I recognized.
"I have to admit," said Xechi through laughter that she could barely control, "I did not expect that to work so well. Do all Vicars enter such trances? I must try this out on Murn when she returns. Or perhaps Tanya. She is less likely to break both of my arms, though perhaps she will try to crack my back again. She likes to do that."
Too humiliated and too busy to deal with all of this, I stormed off. I needed food, for myself and for Raine, and then I was going to sit in a room and not deal with people like them for a long-ass while.