Goblin Library

Chapter 8

Tae-pung, holding the yellow key, looked at it curiously and asked,

“How do I use it?”

“Just think about what you want and use it. Ah! Of course, you can’t make gold with this.”

“You can’t?”

“Why, are you disappointed?”

“A little.”

He said a little, but in reality, he was very disappointed. After all, when it came to goblin clubs, it was all about “gold, come out, thud!”

The Cauldron Goblin chuckled at Tae-pung’s answer and said,

“Even we goblins have rules. We don’t do anything that greatly interferes with the flow.”

“The flow…”

“The flow of the human world. We observe humans for fun, and sometimes play pranks, but that doesn’t cause any major problems in the human world.”

The Cauldron Goblin held up her bunch of keys and continued,

“But gold is different. If we make too much of it, the human economy could collapse. That’s not good.”

A puzzled look appeared on Tae-pung’s face. He had heard that goblins had resident registration cards and paid taxes, but he never imagined that they would even care about the human economy.

“You even consider that?”

“Of course. Even though we goblins live as we please and only seek fun, that’s only possible because the human world exists. Where would we play if the human world collapsed?”

Then the Cauldron Goblin said with a smile,

“That’s why we don’t do anything that would disrupt the balance of the human world.”

“Then how do you make money? The Bamboo Sword Goblin’s car was very nice.”

The Bamboo Sword Goblin’s car was a foreign sports car from a famous brand. Just the maintenance costs alone would be a fortune, so he wondered how they made money if they didn’t make gold with goblin clubs.

“Even without clubs, we have time, and gambling.”

“Time?”

He understood that gambling meant making money by participating in gambling, but he didn’t quite understand what she meant by time.

“There are things that turn into money over time. Like pottery and art. The Bamboo Sword Goblin collected old books and famous calligraphy… Ah! I invested in land.”

“Well, the elders do say that land doesn’t betray you.”

“That’s right.”

Tae-pung looked at the Cauldron Goblin nodding her head and asked, fiddling with the key in his hand,

“Then, besides making gold, what can it do? Like in fairy tales, can it let you use all sorts of magic…?”

The Cauldron Goblin shook her head.

“Of course not. No matter how thoughtless I am as a goblin, would I give such great power to a human like you?”

“Then what can it do?”

If it couldn’t even do “gold, come out, thud!” and there were many other restrictions, he wondered what he could even do with it.

“Cleaning.”

“Clean… ing?”

Seeing Tae-pung’s bewildered face, the Cauldron Goblin said with a smile,

“I’m giving it to you because it seems like cleaning will be difficult.”

“So if I think, ‘Let’s clean,’ will it clean automatically?”

“Hey, it’s not like the goblin club is an AI club that will do everything by itself.”

Then, the Cauldron Goblin held up her key, the goblin club, and said,

“When you hold an object and do something, like repetitive tasks, ‘start’ or ‘let’s do this’ or…”

The Cauldron Goblin stopped her rambling explanation and smacked her lips.

“It’s hard to explain.”

After organizing her thoughts for a moment, she looked at Tae-pung again and said,

“First, think ‘Let’s clean’ and try cleaning once. Then the way you cleaned and your movements will be saved here.”

“If it’s saved… Ah, so next time I clean, if I activate what’s saved, it will clean automatically?”

“That’s right. But you have to set up the cleaning supplies. Or save it before you clean.”

“It’s similar to the macro function used in games.”

The Cauldron Goblin’s eyes sparkled at the mention of games.

“You play games too?”

“I used to play a little.”

“Well, there’s no one who hasn’t played games. I play a game called R.”

“Ah, I see.”

As he replied, Tae-pung thought that goblins seemed to be enjoying modern civilization more than he had imagined.

“Try it sometime. It’s fun.”

“Okay.”

As he spoke, Tae-pung looked at the yellow key in his hand.

“Then is the only function of this club a macro function?”

“Macro. That’s a fun word. That’s right. After all, it’s dangerous to unlock all the functions of the goblin club for a human like you.”

Tae-pung nodded at the Cauldron Goblin’s words and looked at the key.

‘A goblin club with a macro function. How absurd.’

As Tae-pung was thinking this, the fire truck started moving with its siren blaring.

Wee-woo! Wee-woo!

Tae-pung winced at the loud siren and covered his ears with his hands.

Seeing this, the Cauldron Goblin said with a smile. Perhaps because it was a goblin’s voice, it wasn’t very loud, but it wasn’t drowned out by the siren either.

“The sound is really loud when you hear it from on top of the fire truck like this.”

“That’s true.”

At Tae-pung’s words, the Cauldron Goblin smiled and looked ahead.

The cars on the road were making way for the fire truck one by one, or speeding up to open the path.

Seeing this, the Cauldron Goblin smiled.

“Seeing things like this makes me think people are still pure and kind.”

Hearing the Cauldron Goblin’s words, Tae-pung also looked ahead. As she said, seeing the cars moving out of the way to avoid blocking the fire truck’s path did make him feel good.

Just then, the fire truck sped up a bit more. Tae-pung, scared of the shaking, gently grabbed the Cauldron Goblin’s arm.

The Cauldron Goblin laughed at Tae-pung’s actions.

“Don’t worry. This rope won’t break.”

“Even if a scary dog is tied to a leash, it doesn’t mean it’s not scary.”

The Cauldron Goblin nodded as if what Tae-pung said made sense, then suddenly took out a notebook from her coat pocket.

“That’s a good saying.”

Then she started writing down what Tae-pung had just said.

Tae-pung peeked at what she was writing in the notebook and said,

“You’re even taking notes.”

“A writer should make it a habit to take notes. Especially cool and meaningful sentences should be written down as soon as you hear them. So you can use them later.”

The Cauldron Goblin replied and put her notebook back in her coat pocket. Then she looked ahead and said with a smile,

“Here it comes.”

At the Cauldron Goblin’s words, Tae-pung looked where she was looking.

A man was sitting on top of a car ahead, just like them.

At first glance, the man also seemed to be a goblin. Otherwise, there would be no reason for him to be sitting cross-legged on top of a moving car, and he wouldn’t be able to do so.

Unlike the Cauldron Goblin and the Bamboo Sword Goblin, the man was wearing hanbok… a white hanbok that commoners in historical dramas would wear.

“Is that the Honey Bucket Goblin?”

“That’s right.”

“But his outfit is very different.”

“Humans also dress differently according to their tastes. It’s the same with goblins. That’s just the Honey Bucket Goblin’s taste.”

As she spoke, the Cauldron Goblin raised her hand.

“Honey Bucket!”

The Honey Bucket Goblin turned his head at the Cauldron Goblin’s call. And a look of pity appeared on Tae-pung’s face.

This was because the Honey Bucket Goblin’s face looked as if he had endured all the hardships in the world alone.

‘Well, if he’s a goblin born from a honey bucket, he must have gone through a lot.’

As Tae-pung muttered to himself and looked at the Honey Bucket Goblin, he raised his hand.

As the Honey Bucket Goblin looked back to the front, the Cauldron Goblin nodded and turned to Tae-pung.

“It’s starting now.”

Tae-pung nodded and looked ahead. At the sound of the siren blaring in all directions, the cars were moving aside little by little, and the fire truck was speeding through the gaps.

But it wasn’t going very fast. Although the cars were moving aside, some of the cars ahead were still driving, unaware of the situation.

Then, when the siren got closer, they finally realized the situation and moved to the sides to make way.

Tae-pung’s eyes narrowed as he watched.

The car the Honey Bucket Goblin was riding in suddenly entered the lane that the other cars had cleared for the fire truck and started to speed up.

Vroom.

The fire truck, surprised, hurriedly honked its horn.

Honk! Honk!

Despite the loud honking, the car didn’t change lanes and continued forward.

Seeing this, the cars that had changed lanes also honked their horns loudly.

Honk! Honk! Honk!

It was both a sign to clear the lane and a way of cursing at the driver for being so inconsiderate.

Then, the traffic light turned red, and the car stopped. Naturally, this was incredibly frustrating for the fire truck.

Honk! Honk!

The fire truck honked again, but the car didn’t move. Instead, the window rolled down and a hand emerged.

Swish.

The hand pointed at the red light… no, to be precise, at the speed camera next to the traffic light.

It meant that if they moved now, they would be caught on camera and fined.

The firefighter, seemingly angry, honked the horn loudly again. Every second counted in a fire, and the situation could change drastically, so he was understandably in a hurry.

The driver of another car waiting next to the fire truck seemed to grasp the situation and got out of his car.

He then went straight to the car blocking the fire truck and knocked on the window.

“Move your car! Move your car!”

But there was no response from the car.

“Move your car! I said move your car!”

Clank! Clank!

As he tried to open the car door, the car window rolled down, and a rough voice poured out from within.

“Are you crazy! Can’t you see the light is red! Are you trying to get me a ticket!”

“The fire truck can’t get through because of you!”

“So what! What do you want me to do! I’m following the traffic rules, what more do you want!”

The person in the car raised their voice, and the other person said in disbelief,

“The fire truck is in a hurry, so just come out for now. If you get a ticket from the police because of photos or something, you can just file an objection later.”

“Why should I go through that hassle?”

“Can’t you see the fire truck is in a hurry?”

“So you think I have all the time in the world to go back and forth to the police station to file an objection?”

“What kind of person are you? Move your car!”

“Hey, you little…”

The voices grew louder, and eventually the car driver opened the door and stepped out.

“You little punk, how dare you raise your voice at me! Hey, how old are you!”

He then grabbed the other man by the collar, and the man winced.

“What are you doing, let go of me!”

Seeing the two men struggling, Cha Im-beom got out of the fire truck.

“What do you think you’re doing!”

As Cha Im-beom approached them shouting, the Cauldron Goblin smiled and took out a key.

She shook it, and the key’s shape changed.

Whoosh!

The key transformed into a walkie-talkie. The Cauldron Goblin showed off the walkie-talkie in her hand, then smiled and looked at Cha Im-beom.

The story was starting to be written.

***

Cha Im-beom hurriedly got out of the fire truck and tried to stop the two men who were fighting.

『Sirs, please stop fighting.』

As Cha Im-beom approached, the man who had been demanding the car to move aside quickly said,

『Look at this guy. He won’t move his car and is picking a fight.』

Cha Im-beom looked troubled at the man’s words as if asking him to take his side, then checked that the traffic light had changed and quickly said,

『Please move your car first. The light has changed.』

The man who had been demanding the car to move aside looked at the jerk.

『You’re really lucky. Move your car!』

As he was about to return to his own car, the jerk shouted,

『You little punk, how dare you try to lecture me and leave!』

Seeing the jerk blocking the man’s way, Cha Im-beom hurriedly said to him,

『Sir, please calm down. We’re in a hurry, so could you please move your car?』

『Do I look like I have all the time in the world! I’m a busy person too!』

***

“What are you going to do if I don’t move! What are you going to do!”

Seeing the jerk refusing to move his car in front of the fire truck and pushing his head towards Cha Im-beom as if daring him to hit him, the Cauldron Goblin brought the walkie-talkie to her mouth with a smile.

Crackle! Crackle!

“Fire at Mapo ** Villa, crackle crackle crackle!”

She said the location of the fire and then made a crackling sound with her mouth.

***

[Fire at Mapo ** Villa, crackle crackle crackle!]

The jerk, who had been shouting at Cha Im-beom and pushing his head towards him, turned his eyes to the walkie-talkie.

『Mapo ** Villa? There’s a fire at Mapo ** Villa! My house is on fire!』

『Your house? Is ** Villa your home?』

『Y-yes.』

『Then move your car quickly. We’re on our way there.』

『Ah… Okay.』

As the jerk, surprised, hurriedly tried to get to his car, the driver next to him shouted,

『You were blocking the fire truck when someone else’s house was on fire, but now that it’s your own house, you’re in a real hurry!』

The jerk glared at the driver at his shout. But he didn’t have the time to argue when his own house was on fire.

The jerk hurriedly got into his car and started the engine. But…

Whirr! Whirr!

Only the sound of the wheels spinning could be heard; the engine wouldn’t start. The jerk looked at Cha Im-beom with a desperate expression.

『Hey! Push my car from behind!』

『Huh?』

『I need to push the car to move it!』

Cha Im-beom looked at him with a dumbfounded expression, and the driver next to him hurriedly approached the cars behind them.

He asked them to move their cars forward and then changed lanes to position his car right in front of the jerk’s car.

『Hey! What are you doing!』

Honk!

Ignoring the jerk’s honking, the man waved his hand, and a few cars behind him started moving.

Confirming that the next lane was clear, the man said to Cha Im-beom,

『The next lane is open, go this way.』

Cha Im-beom glanced at the next lane and then hurriedly got back into the fire truck.

Seeing this, the jerk shouted,

『Push my car!』

But ignoring his shouts, the fire truck changed lanes and departed.

Wee-woo! Wee-woo!

The jerk shouted something, but his voice was quickly drowned out by the siren.

—————

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