Gacha Gacha Hero

*Knock*Knock*

“Come in. We were expecting you.”

“You have the infiltrators assembled?”

“They’re all right here.”

Meeker waved an arm at a group of shadowy thieves sitting around his table.

The cloaked figures drew their cloaks tighter around their necks and pulled their hats down over their faces. They hurried inside the apartment and took a seat at the table next to the others.

Meeker shut the door behind them. A dim halo of candlelight illuminated the living room. Shadows lurked behind the various tea kettles that lined the walls. In the darkness their handles became listening ears and their spouts became sinister eyes passing judgement on the group of assembled thieves.

Meeker *Shuffled* some papers on the table.

“During the final event of the Tournament we will get into the vault and grab the loot. We will then use the elevators to transport the treasure down to the underground service tunnels. Once there we will load the goods into carriages and use them to smuggle our take out of the Gambling Hall.”

“Won’t people notice us loading all this treasure into the carriages?” The Bowler Hat Rascal asked.

“They might, but it doesn’t matter. The Councilor is visiting the Ocean’s Bounty right now. All of his Capital Guard escorts are currently being barracked in the service tunnels. Between them, the regular security, the servers, porters, and the tourists, there will be too many people to keep track of.” Meeker pointed at a maze of service tunnels on his map of the Ocean’s Bounty.

“We can slip in during the event and be gone before anyone notices.” The Bowler Hat Rascal nodded.

“This is where you infiltrators come in. Before the event you need to sneak into the motor pool and summon five more carriages for us to use during our escape. I’ll send down a note telling the bouncers that more carriages are being added by the Capital Guards. We will load these carriages with treasure during the heist. When we’re finished we simply drive away without anyone asking questions. Do you all understand?”

*Silent nods around the table*

“Good. I’ll make sure that gemstones are delivered to you soon. Make sure that you all are ready when the time comes.”

#

“Can you think of anything I might have missed?” Meeker frowned down at the huge map in front of him.

“Are you sure that five carriages will be enough? It might be good to have some spares in case some of them are broken or you need to make an early escape.”

“You’re right.” Meeker made a note in the margins of the map. “Get… more… carriages… for the… escape. There. That should take care of it. The plan is ready.”

Meeker stood back and looked over the huge map with squiggles scrawled along the sides. An enormous boar was crouched down at his side. The boar’s eyes were level with the table and scanned the contents with clear consideration.

“I never would have attempted this if it wasn’t for you Pente.” Meeker ran a hand over the boar’s bristly back. “You’re the only one who really believes in me. You are the only one that I trust with the full knowledge of the plan.”

“I’m honored Meeker. Are you sure that I really deserve such a big responsibility?”

“Of course you do. You are my secret weapon. You’ve shared a thousand years of knowledge with me. You’ve gone over the calculations of how much gold we can carry. You explained how the jade statues needed to be packaged for transport. You helped me plan the optimal escape routes through the city. Without you none of this would have been possible.” Meeker waved at the map.

“Meeker… you don’t know what that means to me. All of the others, they were always so disappointed with me. I was big and strong. They said that I should help them fight. But I didn’t like fighting. I hated it.” Pente sunk to the floor. The boar’s nose twitched. “I liked calculating. And I liked planning. But that wasn’t enough. So I hid myself away.”

Meeker bent down and scratched the prodigious pig behind the ear. “Pente, Pente, you don’t have to worry about that. You’re not in the dungeon any more. And you’ll never have to fight as long as I’m around.”

“You promise.”

“I promise.”

Meeker stood up. He walked over to the window and stared out. He looked up past the rooftops of the buildings around his apartment. In the distance daggers of light from the Ocean’s Bounty cut across the fabric of the dark sky.

“One last job. The biggest this town has ever seen. And once it’s done I’ll be the most infamous thief in the entire Kingdom. No more fighting. No more stealing. We will never have to work a day in our lives ever again.”

“That sounds nice. Maybe you could buy a nice quiet cottage outside the city.”

“Come on Pente, we will be richer than our wildest dreams. We will have a mansion, and servants. Fine clothes, and electric lamps. Nothing but the best for us from now on.”

Pente looked at Meeker. “If that’s what you want Meeker.”

Meeker looked at the city. “It’s what everyone wants Pente. And it’s what I deserve.”

“Meeker…”

“Hmmm?”

“There is one last thing.” Pente twisted a hoof on the floorboards.

“What is it?” Meeker asked.

“I don’t know how to say it. I don’t know what to do. It’s hard to explain. In the Ocean’s Bounty… there’s another one. Another like me.”

“Another big talking animal?”

“That’s right.”

“It’s the cat. Isn’t it?”

Pente’s mouth opened and shut. “How did you know?”

Meeker paced in front of the window. “There have always been rumors of Lady House’s exceptionally efficient security system. For years the Ocean’s Bounty has been untouchable. Anyone that tries to pull a con on the grounds is caught almost immediately. Most Haberdashers believe that Lady House is some kind of witch. Some say that she has a magic sword that can find criminals.”

Meeker stepped over to the table in the center of the room. He pulled three teacups off of the shelves nearby. He set the cups down on the table.

“I always wondered why she kept that annoying animal with her at all times. Why she would let it wander her gambling hall unsupervised all the time.”

Meeker put a sugar cube down on the table.

“After I met you it all made so much sense.”

Meeker put a larger sugar cube on the table.

“An animal can go places that a person can’t. And if a thief did sneak in they wouldn’t care if they were spotted by a dumb cat. But if the cat can talk, it can give Lady House information. Anyone who tries to pull a job while that cat is watching them has failed before they’ve even started.

Meeker flipped the teacups over. One of them he placed on top of the small sugar cube, another on the large sugar cube, and the last one remained empty.

Meeker started shifting the cups on the table. He moved one to the side, then swapped its position on the table with another. He repeated this action, over and over, faster and faster.

“But she doesn’t know about you. You’ve never left the apartment. And since she doesn’t know then that means the cat doesn’t know. And therefore the cat doesn’t know that I know. Which means that I know what it doesn’t know.”

Meeker stopped spinning the cups. He spread his fingers wide and flipped over all three teacups at the same time.

The sugar cubes were gone. Under the center cup was a single glittering coin.

Pente *Clip Clop Clapped* its hooves together in applause. “Wow Meeker. That was incredible. But… I still don’t see how you’re going to prevent Lady House’s cat from discovering your plan.”

Meeker smiled. “The point is that all we have to do for this plan succeeds is to make sure that the person inside the Ocean’s Bounty that finds out about it, isn’t the cat.”

The boar wiggled its tusks in thought. “Huh?”

*Knock*Knock*

Meeker walked over to the door. He opened it.

“Good. You’re here. Don’t worry. Everyone else has left. There’s no one here but us.”

The Vesper Debutante stepped into the room.