Foundation of All

They finally got to see the statues of the Founders as a big group. Lira was excited, but not as overjoyed as Sean had expected her to be. The statues were abstract blobs carved out of stone and nearly forty feet high and at least the same distance wide. All carved by hand with a chisel by one of the Founders. He could appreciate the work that went into it even if he didn't fully understand Lira's excited explanations on the analysis of what all the little bumps and ridges meant. They all just looked like strange rippling blobs of stone to him with the occasional sharp edge or two to break things up.

Sean listened as Brenda told him how to properly find and refine sulfur from raw materials. It was useful in many chemical processes later on, so it was essential to always being able to find a supply if he wanted to build the more advanced technologies.

They went for a few more days before the session ended. It was just him and her for this one, most of the other casual learners dropping out as Sean advanced his knowledge beyond the basics.

Sean went to leave, but Brenda stopped him.

“Sean, stay behind for a moment. I want to talk about something now that I’m not on duty as it were.”

Sean paused, but then turned back around.

“What about?” He asked curiously. Brenda walked over to her desk and sat behind it, gesturing to the seat she had set up opposite it. Usually they just stood in the center of the room together for her teaching demonstrations and the desk went unused.

“So, you and Lira,” Brenda began, “How long has that been going on?”

Sean tensed, unsure where she was going with this. “A few decades or so,” Sean said, “I thought I told you, didn’t I? I thought you already knew.”

“I did not,” Brenda said heavily, “She told me about what happened between you and Lars as well. Seems like you haven’t done wrong by her so far. Although…”

She smirked, “You missed one of your dates I suppose? She seemed rather upset at you about that.”

Sean rubbed the back of his head and grimaced, “Yeah, I don’t think she’ll ever forget about that one. It’s two alarms on the holopad all the time from now on. On Lira’s strict orders.”

“I don’t think I’d survive another incident like that if I forgot again,” he joked.

Brenda eyed him for a long moment before nodding slightly,

“You better not break her heart or I’ll break your balls. Multiple times. Got it?” She said sharply, “That girl doesn’t need anything else to hurt her after everything else she’s already gone through.”

“Er, Okay. Yes, Ma’am,” Sean said, “I definitely won’t. I really do love her, even if we’ve only been together for a blink of an eye for older immortals like you.”

Brenda pursed her lips and searched his face again before looking satisfied, “Good,” she said, “Are you aware that Lira has come to me recently for advice? I like gossip as the much as the next girl, but I wouldn’t be talking to you about it just for that.”

“What did you talk about? Has she decided to take some of the survival courses again? I’ve tried to convince her to go back for a while now.”

Brenda looked surprised, “Really? That’s all you were telling her to do?”

Sean frowned, “Yes? Why, what did she say?”

Brenda steepled her fingers and considered before speaking, “Well, the two of us were just catching up with each other. I was just worried that you were pressuring her to do something serious that she didn’t actually want to do. Speak to her if you want to know what we spoke about, it’s not my secret to tell.”

Sean sat there for a moment wondering what it could be before Brenda waved her hand at him.

“Go, shoo. Just ask her and see what she says. I’m sure if you ask nicely enough she’ll tell you. She’s certainly smitten enough for it. But do your pondering outside of my classroom.”

Sean stood, “Thanks, Brenda. See you next class.”

“See you then,” she said before making a lazy shooing motion of her hand as Sean walked out the door.

Lira was teaching Sean acrylic painting as their activity together today.

Her back was to him and she hummed distractedly as she started mixing a different shade of blue for the landscape scene she was creating while telling him her thought process on which shades to use where.

“So, Lira,” Sean said casually, “You talked with Brenda about something? Thinking of taking some survival classes?”

Lira’s hand spasmed and her brush accidentally plunged into the red paint and she swore briefly as the shade she was mixing was ruined. He waited as she quickly wiped off the brush, put it to the side, and then turned around to face him.

“Er, ah. Something like that,” Lira said after she rubbed her hands off on the painting apron she was wearing, “Just wanted to talk with her about my options.”

Sean eyed her for a moment, noticing the tension in her shoulders and the way she didn’t want to meet his eyes.

“Are you sure?” He said, “Brenda implied that it was something more than that. Is it going to be dangerous?”

Lira hesitated before finally meeting his eyes, “I’ll be fine afterwards,” she said in a strange tone.

Sean didn’t reply for a moment, taken aback by her sudden intensity. Finally he nodded to her.

“Okay,” he said, “As long as you’re sure about it.”

She relaxed and turned back to the paints. The rest of their conversation was subdued and Lira seemed guilty about something. Sean could tell. To all of the rest of these immortals, probably including Lira, they had only been together for a small sliver of their lifespan. But now that Sean was over a hundred years old he had spent over seventy years of his life with her. Sean sometimes barely even remembered his time before Immortus station anymore after so long. And he had been with Lira for most of that time, so he felt more in tune with her mood than anyone else in his entire life prior.

He wondered why she was holding things back from him.

“How you feeling, V4?” Sean said as he worked on the robot's leg. It had been decades since the machine had first been constructed and Sean had to replace various parts every once in a while to make sure V4 stayed healthy and mobile.

“I’m well, Sean,” V4 replied, “I’ve noticed that my shoulder joint seems to have become stiff recently. Would you like to run a diagnostic on it?”

Sean nodded and finished replacing the worn out part and sealed up the leg.

“Sure thing, V4,” Sean said before doing the same with V4’s shoulder as he checked the parts.

Eventually, he finished and sealed up the shoulder too. It seems that one of the whitish synthetic muscles had been worn out, and replacing it had fixed the issue.

“What will happen if my neural network degrades?” V4 suddenly asked just as Sean was about to leave.

“Well, I suppose we’d just swap out the chips,” Sean said lightly, “It’s the same as any body part I would think, although more complicated.”

“But am I not unique?” V4 countered, “Models V5 to V15 never approached anything close to the self awareness that I possess. What if replacing the chips reverts me to their level of intelligence?”

Sean hesitated. In truth he had already considered the issue, but there was nothing to be done. He had no clue what had made V4 so successful and V4's neural network was contained on the physical chips in the robot frame. They couldn’t just be copied and transferred somewhere else easily.

“Don’t you worry about that,” Sean said, “We’ll figure something else out if it comes to it.”

“Can I be transferred to a more advanced body then?” V4 asked, “This body is degrading and falling apart more and more after each activation. I do not want to wake up one day and discover that I am completely immobile or dysfunctional.”

Sean hesitated, but then sighed. He was avoiding the problem. V4 was right, it was growing harder and harder to maintain V4’s body as time went on. And with how intelligent the robot was, Sean didn’t feel right about just shutting it off or letting it die. Sean had helped it develop all the way back from its first activation to this point.

Sean pulled up his holopad and flicked to the robotic designs from Emily’s factory in Foundation of All. There were so many Sean hadn’t combed through them all, but they ranged from the relatively simple to fiendishly complex to build and everything in between. He handed the device to V4.

“I guess you’re right,” Sean said, “Look through all the designs in there and create a list of what body you’d like me to build with the positives and negatives of each option. Try to rank them in order of desirability to you as best as you can. If you have any questions then feel free to ask me or Lira anything when we’re nearby. If this works then maybe we can finally get you out of this lab without worrying about you getting damaged. I’ll leave you powered on even while I’m not here so you can look through the files. Just don’t interrupt anyone else who wanders in here and listen to Ricardo’s orders and you’ll be fine. ”

“Understood, Sean. I’ll get right on it.”

The robot turned to the holopad and immediately started gesturing and pulling up windows for all the robot designs he had to choose from.

“Alright, V4,” Sean said, “I’ll be going now. Have fun.”

“Goodbye, Sean,”

Sean walked to the front and turned to Ricardo who as always looked rather bored as he played a hologame on the table in front of him.

Sean cleared his throat. Ricardo swiped his hand again, too focused on his game to notice.

Sean cleared his throat again. No response.

“Ricardo.”

The man jolted and was surprised to see Sean standing there. His character died in the game while he was distracted. Ricardo hit a few buttons to close the game and looked up, looking vaguely annoyed.

“Yeah, Sean? Bah, game's impossible to beat either way. Anyways, how’s that robot of yours doing? I never realized those things could grow that intelligent. Makes you wonder why the core worlds don’t use them more often…”

“He’s good,” Sean said, “I was about to ask about him actually. I can leave him switched on while I’m not here, right? I’ve told him to follow your orders, so he shouldn’t cause any trouble.”

Ricardo hesitated before shaking his head, “Well, technically not. But for that robot I’ll bend the rules a bit. Rules weren’t really designed for intelligent machines being built here. But I’ll cover for you, I’ll make sure it doesn’t cause any trouble.”

“Thanks, Ricardo. I appreciate it.”

Sean and Lira were at the pool. The same pool that Sean had learned to swim with Brenda at in fact. Sean was currently standing on top of the diving board high towards the ceiling as Lira sat at the edge far below looking up at him. Sean stepped to the edge of the diving board and bounced on it slightly. He took a deep breath. Keep it steady, Sean. He had done this hundreds of times flawlessly before, but now that Lira was watching him his nerves were all over the place.

He took one final little hop before leaping off the board and started flipping around with easy practice. As he spun he saw the water below rapidly approaching as he fell. At the last second he extended his body outwards and hit the water with his hands extended above his head. The cool water washed over him and he felt the flurry of bubbles tickle his legs as he went deep into the water. His arms ached for a moment before his regeneration washed away his pain again.

He rapidly ascended to the surface and popped his head out of the water. Lira began clapping from the side.

“Wow, Sean! That was amazing!” She said, “You flipped so many times on the way down!”

Sean paddled over and pulled himself out of the water to sit next to her.

“Yes, took a lot of practice to get that good,” he said, “But it felt great when I finally got it right for the first time.”

“Hmmmm.”

Sean looked to the side and saw Lira’s carefree expression had dropped away into something more thoughtful.

“Are you okay?” Sean asked.

“Yeah, fine,” she said absently, “Why do you keep asking me that?”

Sean didn’t answer and just kicked his feet in the water for a minute or two.

“You want me to do it again?” He said eventually after she didn't say anything else.

She glanced up at him, still seeming distracted. “Oh? Yeah. Show me again. It was so graceful…”

Sean got to his feet and the water dribbled off his legs to the floor with wet plops.

“Okay,” he said before making his way back to the elevator. He had thought if he showed off to her he could get a reaction. But still nothing…

Sean did a few more dives, but he could see that Lira’s heart wasn’t really in it. Sean ended it early and Lira didn’t even seem to notice. They walked back to her room together and Sean wondered what had gone so wrong. She seemed so distant lately and always thinking of something else. It was only getting worse as time passed. Did it have to do with whatever Brenda had talked with Lira before?

They sat in the living room of Lira’s place on the couch. Lira took a shaky breath and suddenly turned and looked at him intensely.

“Sean,” she said, “I’ve been hiding something. I didn’t want to upset you, but… it’s only days away now. It’s not fair to… just leave you wondering like that when I disappear for who knows how long.”

Sean sat up and stared at her intensely. “What is it?” he asked in concern, “Are you okay?”

She took another shaky breath, “Yes, I’m fine,” she said, “Remember back when you asked about what I was talking about with Brenda?”

Sean nodded.

“Well, I realized after you missed our date that one time that I’m relying too much on you. If Lars attacked me right now, what would I do? I… I would just cry and be… be weak again.”

Sean stood up suddenly. “I would protect you! Lars?! What did he do! Where is he?!”

He rushed towards her, his mind racing as he thought of what could have possibly happened.

“No, I… Sit next to me,” she said and Sean complied. Seeing her reaction to his words, he relaxed a little. He sat next to her and she leaned slightly so their shoulders were touching.

She took Sean’s hand and lifted it up so it was at their eye level. She turned it over and gently pressed his palm and fingers one by one as he waited in confused silence.

“You, I’m better at martial arts than you Sean. I always beat you in the practice spars,” Lira eventually said as she lowered his hand, “But you’re the one that beat Lars in the fight, not me. And that’s because you’ve learned to push past the pain. I’ve been running from what I really am for such a long time. An Immortal. Lars was right, him hitting me shouldn’t have hurt me like it did. I could’ve made it so it didn’t after the first time, but I chose not to. I knew that Immortals that went through horrible things learned to overcome their pain. But I was scared. Just like I always was back then.”

Sean curled his free hand into a fist. “Lira, don’t blame yourself. It’s only Lars that deserves…”

“No, I… let me finish,” Lira said, cutting him off.

“Even now, I let you protect me in that fight instead of helping. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I just sat there, my hand on my cheek, and watched on as you defeated Lars for me. I was just… weak. This is how I beat that. By training with Brenda. By having horrible things happen to me so I can be strong.”

Sean stiffened in shock. What? But…

“No, Lira!” he said, “Please, I know you don’t want this! You don’t have to be tortured just to be strong. You’re so strong as you are, strongest person I know.”

“Strongest?” Lira scoffed, “Don’t lie to me. I’ve been nothing but weak ever since we’ve met. Hiding away from Lars, insecure that you’ll leave me after you miss one stupid date, and not even brave enough to talk to you about this until it’s only days away! Sometimes I see you talking to the other women at the parties and wonder why you would pick me out of everyone here…”

“You’re so strong,” Sean said intently, “You think feeling nothing is the same as being strong? It’s not. You recovering and letting yourself be happy after getting away from Lars, that’s strong. I could never do that. Especially after those… after the Immortal Council let him walk free with a slap on the wrist. You’re always underselling yourself. You’re the most caring, kind person that I know. I want to be with you more than any other woman in the universe. I have been for over seventy years. Doesn't that count for something?”

“But…”

“Look, I want to tell you a story of what real strength was,” Sean said cutting off her budding protest, “My mother… you know that our family maintained the turrets around the settlement. It was the most dangerous job in the whole town, giant beasts could rush the line at any time and try to attack you. My father died in what I now know was a plot to murder us all. But we thought it was an accident at the time. With only me and my mom left she was the only one left who knew everything needed to do the job. I was still learning as best as I could to catch up and help her.”

Sean’s eyes glazed over as he barely remembered back to a time that felt like forever ago yet the emotions were still there, crystal clear.

“But it wasn’t enough. Every day, she would smile and laugh when she got home. Even when she became more and more overworked. Even when she lost sleep working late into the night with all the extra tasks the town elders forced her into doing. Even when she knew how dangerous it was to go out there. She was grieving my father’s death too, but she still smiled at me every day just before she left to show that things were okay. Smiling for me.”

Sean met Lira’s eyes, “She did it every day until she died. That… that was real strength. Not…”

Sean wiggled his fingers of the hand still in Lira’s grip.

“This…” he said, “I… You’ve already gone through so much. Why should you have to go through more? I don’t want that for you.”

Lira leaned against him for a few seconds, “Thank you, Sean.” She said, “But I need to do this. I can’t be weak anymore. I just can’t. I would just put it off again and again like before. I don’t want to be that person anymore. This is why I was so nervous to tell you. I didn’t want to hurt you like this.”

Sean thought about it and Lira waited for his response.

“Okay,” he said finally, “Okay. If… if it’s what you really need to do to feel safe, then do it. I understand feeling powerless. I knew after my mother died that each time I came back after leaving the walls could be my last. But the elders forced me to go out the next time no matter how much I wanted to refuse. Just… tell me earlier next time for something big like this. We shouldn’t hide things from each other. I’ve been worried about you.”

“I’m sorry,” Lira said as they sat shoulder to shoulder, “I didn’t mean to. Hopefully after I’m done we can put all of this behind us. Spend some time together building V4 her new body.”

“Sounds nice. Sounds nice…” Sean said before trailing off and letting the room fall into silence.