Formicea

 

I wake up again.

Surprisingly this tub is rather comfortable.
I am floating a little bit inside this substance.

This time I feel astonishing good.
The fever is gone and my itch settled.
Also, my stomach got a little better while my head stopped throbbing.

I see Kyska who seemingly has really just the job to stay close to me.
My throat feels sore and I need to drink something.
So I decide to ask for it, as she was rather courteous until now.

 

<Screak!/Thirsty!> (E)

 

Huh?
What was that?
That didn't sound like normal speech!?
That didn't sound like a voice in the first place!?

 

<Immediately, my princess!> (K)

 

She understood!?
What is going on here?
I grab my throat and try to make sounds.

 

<Scree!/No!... Keek!/What is this?... Reecs!/What is with my voice?... Eeeaachrrr!/It won’t change!... Screeaaahh!/Make it stop!> (E)

<Princess, you are screaming! What is wrong?> (K)

<Creak, screa!/My voice! It won't come out normal!> (E)

<Oh, is that it? Your throat just adjusted to your new existence. That's all there is to it.> (K)

<N-no this isn't it! I want my voice back!> (E)

 

I continue to shout out these screeches and panic more and more.

 

<You should maybe drink this first, my princess.> (K)

 

Kyska hands me a vessel of some kind, filled with liquid.
With all that happened to me, I've lost my trust, yet my throat won't get better without liquid.

I take a slow sip and this is absolutely no water.
Rather it is sweet again.
Extremely sweet.

The strange thing is, I never was excessively into sweets, but now I could down it all at once.
We were never rich enough to afford them and even on occasions I would at most take a bit.
Now I could get addicted to this.
That might be a bit much to say, nonetheless, this taste is so pleasant that I don't long for something like water and could exclusively rely on this.
In addition, this taste somehow makes me calm down and I can think straight again.

 

<Scree!/What is this?> (E)

<It is nectar from our storage units. They purposely exist just to create this precious liquid.> (K)

<Like cows?> (E)

That's how cows work. Eating grass and then they produce milk.

<Cows?> (K)

<An animal on the surface used for giving milk.> (E)

 

I hate talking with these "creaks".
I don't even know how such a simple expression can contain any information, but Kyska understands everything perfectly.
And I do as well.

 

<Oh, no. Not like this. The nectar units are conscious members of the swarm, acting to fulfill their given role.> (K)

 

So no cows.
But this all is already so foreign that I better not dwell on it.
At least my throat got better with this fluid.
Yet this doesn't help my voice at all.
I tried to avert my mind, but each of these sounds coming from me makes me depressed.

 

<Is there no way to get my voice back?> (E)

 

I am a bit teary due to this situation.
I mean I sound like those insects.

 

<If you insist, it might be possible. However, I wouldn't know where the benefit lies.> (K)

<Please, I only want to be able to talk like before.> (E)

<Hmm, if you wish so. It might just need a bit of practice. Your vocal cords are now set on much higher frequencies than before. Yet it should still be possible to form "human" words. Still, your voice in general will be different.> (K)

 

I cannot revert the changes, but I can adjust my usage.
This isn't perfect, but a way out.
Still, I'm very shaken.
This all is just too much.

 

<I don't understand. Why me?> (E)

<How do you mean this, my princess?> (K)

<It doesn't make any sense. I'm a human. And a very ordinary one at that. Why does that happen to me?> (E)

<Because the queen decided as such!> (K)

 

Kyska is very confident about that.
As if this circumstance would be reason enough to justify absolutely everything.
Yet this isn’t giving me anything.

 

<Why would she? I’m just a normal girl. There is nothing special about me. No redeemable qualities. Why do this to a human in the first place? Where lies the benefit?> (E)

<The queen has her reasons. You are right in so far, that it obviously was a particular extensive act on her side. Yet I don't know the details of your meeting.> (K)

 

Details?

What kind of details!?

 

<That's what I’m trying to say. I didn't do anything. When I saw her, I honestly thought I would die and froze on my spot. I didn't even move after she pushed me down. That's it! And the next moment I got pierced by her tail!> (E)

 

There wasn't anything impressive about that.
Yet for some reason, I can feel how Kyska grows excited.

 

<Oh, my princess! You did great!> (K)

<Excuse me? Didn't we just settle that I just gave up?> (E)

<Yes. How remarkable.> (K)

<In which way is that remarkable?> (E)

 

That sounds just pitiful to me.

 

<Any more primitive creature would have either ignored her, unable to assess the situation, attacked her, giving in to primal urges, or simply tried to escape, even if all the ways would have been guarded. But not you. You understood the magnificence of our queen and abstained from undertaking pointless actions. You chose subordination! There could be no greater proof how fitting you are. Understanding, reasonable, and foremost submissive. These are the most suitable traits for a princess!> (K)

 

Somehow I feel a little insulted.

 

<This is something good?> (E)

<Absolutely! A princess must be able to assess a situation to react appropriately. She must logically define what she can and cannot do. But the most important is that she is devoted to the swarm. A princess exists for a greater purpose and must know her place.> (K)

 

Wonderful. I am a very important servant.

 

<Just what happens to me?> (E)

<My princess, regarding your voice it seems your body might have adjusted now much more. Are there any other differences you've noticed?> (K)

<Other differences?> (E)

<You might not be aware. Most are subtle and could not be visible from the outside.> (K)

 

This idea triggers me and frantic I control if there is any change to my body.
The first is apparent.
My nails blackened.
This is disturbing but neglectable.

My hair feels a bit greasy, yet not directly dirty.
Rather as if it got drenched in oil and looks glistening.
I don't really want to know more about this and dismiss it.

Then I notice something disturbing.
My muscles feel hard.
Like really hard.
And I cannot ease them up.
My arm feels extremely firm beneath the skin when I press.
Still slightly flexible but not much.

 

<Is something wrong with your arm, princess?> (K)

<I cannot relax it. It feels like a strong cramp, but there is no pain. What is with my muscles?> (E)

<Ah, that shouldn't be your muscles!> (K)

<And then what?> (E)

<Your carapace. What else? It seems to have grown now and should by time become sturdier.> (K)

<You... you are telling me under my skin grows...> (E)

<It is something like an inner armor, to protect you, my princess.> (K)

 

This doesn't help!
Forget it! Ignore it!
It is under your skin, so you never must see!

However, the next thing I cannot push aside.
I had constantly experienced pain in my hip, especially stinging at my back.
And now when I strobe there, I feel something.
There is some kind of bulge at the point between where my back ends and my butt begins.
It feels hard and disturbingly I perceive that it’s shifting inside.

 

<Wh-wh-wha-what is this?!!> (E)

<Can you specify, my princess?> (K)

<My... My back! There is something there.> ()

<Really? Let me see.> (K)

 

This insect takes it as an invitation, yet I'm too dumbfounded to protest.
I feel a touch there.

 

<Oh, wonderful! It works out!> (K)

<What works out?> (E)

<This can just be your ovipositor!> (K)

<Ovi-what?> (E)

<This is a stinger, but for laying eggs. You would insert them in some source of nourishment. Living or not. And then out of the laid egg, a new member of the swarm will grow. This is great! Soon you will be able to fulfill your role, my princess!> (K)

<No, no. I mean... how. Eggs? I... I cannot lay eggs. How? I am a human. Eggs, that are living beings of... them. How should I make this? This isn't even my kind.> (E)

 

I tremble and grasp myself, while I start to tear up.

 

<Didn't we talk about this before? You are no human, my princess. You are a princess of the swarm and as such will lay eggs. This is wonderful! Your reproductives could really be adjusted to produce brood. Aren't you glad? You can fulfill your role. And such an important one. Your life is essential now for our whole species!> (K)

"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH" (E)

<Princess!?!> (K)

 

This cannot be!

This cannot be!

I am a human, no insect!

I don't grow something to create these things!

This isn't true!

 

Suddenly some insects burst into the room.
Five of those normal heightened ones who brought me here and even one giant.

 

<Princess!> (worker)

<Threat?> (giant)

<The princess has issues in her metamorphosis. There is no need to intervene.> (K)

 

Kyska, who is apparently in charge of my surveillance is calming them down.
But now I am startled that those creatures came.
Or more, why.
They came because I screamed.
Listening to me.
Their attention was directly on me, waiting for input.

They really made me something they listen to?

 

I fall down on a stool and try to get all of this out of my head.
The next moment Kyska is at me.
She wipes my body which got sweaty with that panic, with some kind of...
I don't want to know.

 

<Everything is alright, princess. You don't need to worry. Your wellbeing is the utmost priority, directly after the queen.> (K)

 

Somehow the "creaks" sound calming, but I'm afraid this is just one more change on me.

 

<Why? Why did you do this to me? I had nothing to do with anything of that and you put me in this position. Isn't it completely crazy to think it might be a good idea that I should be important to you?> (E)

<No, no. The swarm's survival is bound to yours. So everything is for the sake of your life. As long you live the swarm will too and as such your intention to survive as a living being is beneficial for all of us. There's nothing contradicting.> (K)

 

Not completely wrong.
If they told me the truth that is.
But lying insects would be novel.

 

<You are stressed, princess. Please rest now. If the changes solidify the discomfort will vanish. Your metamorphosis is apparently almost completed, so it just needs to finish.> (K)

 

Kyska again brings me to the tub and places me inside.
I would protest that I was barely awake, and I don’t wish for anything to complete, yet I feel weak.
All of this was exhausting and mentally straining.
In addition, it seems whatever happens to my body drains on me.

So I want to sleep.