Falling apart in moonlight

As I entered in school I first saw the boys of my class slacking around under the trees of the school campus. Then I turned to enter the school building. And there I saw Shifu chatting with our classmates (since I don't consider anyone of thenm as my friends). When she saw me she waved and so did I. Then we roamed around talking about her bf " He hasn't replied yet " she said with disappointment and annoyance clear in her voice.

"To what ? " I asked curiously.

"I texted him telling him that I was going to schoo, and that he should have breakfast and sleep and that I will be going then." She said.

And I was zoning out not listening to what she was saying. So I replied with a 'hmm'.

Then she said "Lisa and I almost got into an accident and were saved with a 1 sec "

"WHAT?!" I said clearly shocked I mean a jerk almost killed them!

"Did you see the number of the plate?" I asked clearly in the mood of dragging him to jail.

"He was out of sight by the time we got to look at it." She said.

And then I was annoyed. "Let's stroll around a bit." She said. "Fine" I replied. We walked untill we entered the classroom without realizing it. We sat at oir place and then Lisa and Anu entered. "Where were you both?" I asked. "Sorry "both said at the same time.

Then five minutes later Ren entered with a happy face. I don't know what makes him happy. Then again none of my business. Our teacher taught us for a little while then dismissed us. I mean why is he even taking classes after our farewell. And I was already hoping for him to end it soon anyway.

Then I told Shifu to go and buy snacks with me. Then we came back from all the way near to my house' shop to school. Then we met Lisaand Anu I came back since I had to submit xerox of some documents. Then we went to my hose of the both's scooties. Then my little sister asked me to buy her a chocoalate. So I was on my way to the shop at the entrance of my neighbourhood hoping to not meet Ren and PJ on the way that was obviously not something that happened because as I exited my neighbourhood I saw them. They come here often since their friend whose nickname is PJ lives in front of my house (practically my neighbour that I least associate with).

So as I said I came back and they were already talking with him about random nonsense since they need an excuse to stay here. Then Shifu called her bf "Eat breakfast and go to sleep" Shifu said somewhat ordering him. She said something also too but I was jealous enough from him to have my bff to not listen to their conversation anymore. And.. also because I felt it was funny enough for not to listen to it. Then Lisa ,Anu and I we all started laughing. "What 's so funny Elisa" Shifu said somewhat hurt. I mean I was laughing because its the first time I am hearing someone talk that way. Abd I swear I wasn't making fun of her. Then we all came near ny house and Shifu alone was away just to talk to him. And I was like she was being so much like lovey-dovey I stepped back a jumped to fake- kick her,thats when I noticed Ren hanging on the gate of his friend's house's gate since he cannot look at us through the wall. And I noticed that he was like that for like the whole time. I mean does he have a crush on me or something? Shifu came after ending the call. "Why were you making fun of him?"Shifu said I said " Then why were you so 'lovey-dovey' " "He was sick " she replied." Listen in our whole group only you are the one in relationship that's the reason why we were laughing " I said making us all laugh again .Then Lisa said "Hey, let's go and meet PJ's mom. I wanna greet her." And Shifu said "No, I don't want to, Ren is there" and now I know she totally dislikes him.Like why not,he deserves it. And I whispered to Lisa "I haven't talked to her in ages living in front of them and you want to talk to her, go ahead then." I said, clearly telling her that my introvertism ain't joking. She chuckled.

After like passing half an hour like that Lisa said "Let's send Shifu home" to Anu. Then she was definetly going to forget her keys which I reminded her 'polietly' you know how. After taking the keys when Lisa was climbing Anu's scooty she bumped her knee on the lower side of the seat fo which I laughed whole heartedly. I swear these three never cease to make me happy . And then they left.

Not soon after I heard Ren and PJ leave too, which was too obvious to me .

Now I'm wondering if I hurt Shifu, I mean I think I laughed too hard than you know needed. But I already told her that her being in the relationship is the thing. Not that I hate it. I know she suffered through many hardships to get upto here. And I respect and support her for that. But I can't hide the jelousy for the person that is the major reason for me to live okay. And one day I will tell that to Elijah( her,you know;))

I mean after all those years of living in hardship she was my only support and maybe I was her's, but I still don't believe it because I don't think I'm that special. But I love how she never misses a chance to make me feel better, if she ever feels that I'm down. Thats why I love them all of them make efforts to make me feel better.

But I feel I'm turning into a toxic friend. I mean I sometines say stupid things that I should knkw before speaking I shouldn't. But its always late that I realise it and make a mistake like an idiot I am. Like why am I so stupid? Why can't be a little better? I want to make the feel better too, I want to know them better too, like they do for me. 'Do I deserve such great friends?', I wonder sometimes. That being said if you feel undeserving just know that we all go through hard times and it will all be better one day. I know.

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Something came up, bye for now;) :3