Fairy Tail: I Don't Want to Be the Guild Master

The Infernal Dragon wasn't pleased about being called arrogant, and Natsu didn't appreciate anyone disrespecting Igneel.

With both of them hot-headed and proud, there was really only one way this could end, by throwing fists.

So Natsu charged straight in.

And then Natsu got flattened.

The Infernal Dragon's blows were even heavier than those of the Mountain Dragon. Its tail, thicker than a tree trunk, swept through the air with terrifying speed, striking Natsu without hesitation.

Its massive claws, easily large enough to crush a man, slammed into him with ease and precision.

Normal flames couldn't hurt Natsu, but the Infernal Dragon didn't need fire to pummel him into the dirt.

"Hey! He's one of us!" Rhodes shouted, trying to calm things down. "Go easy on him!"

But the Infernal Dragon didn't care. He struck when he felt like it. The fire dragon cub was sturdy, and this little brother of his clearly needed to toughen up.

Originally, Rhodes had planned to spar with Natsu himself using the Infernal Dragon's power. Instead, he ended up acting as the cleanup crew, carrying Natsu back like luggage.

If he hadn't done it, the Scuttle Crab probably would've.

"Sorry. He might've gone a little overboard," Rhodes muttered, looking down at Natsu, whose body was now covered in bruises and fresh lumps.

Happy, ever the optimist, fluttered alongside them and said, "It's fine! Natsu ends up like this pretty often when he's training."

His idea of "training" involved tying Natsu to a tree and letting boulders tumble down a hill toward him… which Rhodes had seen once. And in terms of brutal training methods, Natsu definitely had a screw loose.

"That damn dragon… I swear I'll pay him back… Ow!" Natsu groaned, trying to sit up. But one of his bruises smacked into the crab's shell, and he winced in pain.

"Stop moving. Just lie still," Rhodes said, gently pushing him back down. "We'll be home soon."

Natsu and Happy's house was built just outside Magnolia, tucked at the base of a small hill. The surrounding area was lush—maybe a little too lush.

Branches actually stuck out of the outer walls like they were part of the structure.

Clearly, home maintenance wasn't high on their list of priorities.

Inside was even more chaotic. Dumbbells of every size cluttered the floor. Clothes, towels, and random jars were scattered around like someone had tried to summon a tornado and halfway succeeded. There was barely any room to walk.

Happy led the way, weaving through the disaster zone. Rhodes followed carefully, navigating the terrain while still carrying Natsu.

But the "obstacles" Rhodes tried to avoid with such care? Natsu kicked or stepped on them without a second thought, even while half-conscious.

"Just lay him there," Happy said, pointing with his paw.

Rhodes raised a brow. "The hammock? You sure?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just toss him on. He'll be fine."

Well, Natsu was tough.

"Alright." Rhodes shrugged and gently dropped Natsu into the hammock.

Surprisingly, Natsu didn't groan or complain. He was snoring within seconds. Looked like he'd be back to his energetic self after a good nap.

By the time Rhodes stepped back outside, the night was deep and quiet. The streets of Magnolia were calm. The streetlamps glowed warmly, casting halos of light where swarms of tiny insects danced in circles. Some bumped against the glass, thudding lightly.

By morning, their little bodies would be scattered at the base of the lamps, more work for the city's cleaning crew.

Rhodes didn't summon Warm, and Mira wasn't with him either.

For once, he just strolled through the silent streets alone.

'They were probably having a good time right now.'

Rhodes wandered alone under the quiet night sky, the laughter of the girls' pajama party echoing faintly in his imagination.

I wonder what they're doing right now... Pillow fights? Ghost stories? Braiding each other's hair?

Overhead, a few bats swooped through the air, snatching up tiny insects fluttering beneath the glow of streetlamps.

Rhodes, bored and restless, slipped off one of his shoes and casually tossed it into the air.

A bat darted after the flying shoe, following its arc with uncanny precision. Just as the shoe began to fall, the bat veered away in a sharp curve, nimbly avoiding it.

He chuckled to himself.

Back when I was a kid, someone said if you threw a shoe high enough, you might actually hit a bat. We used to try it all the time. Never saw anyone pull it off, though.

Grinning like a child, he walked over, picked up his shoe, and tossed it again. Then again. Each time, he retrieved it, laughing softly under his breath.

Simple joys.

No one would've guessed that Fairy Tail's strategist, the ever-calm Rhodes, played games like this when no one was watching.

...

The next morning, sunlight crept over the rooftops of Magnolia. Rhodes stepped out onto the balcony to gather the laundry. There were his clothes, Mira's, and a big bed sheet flapping in the breeze.

He didn't know if Mira had come home last night, so she might not be joining him for breakfast today.

No big deal. He'd just fold up her clothes and drop them off later.

Come to think of it, he still had a change of clothes at Mira's place that he never picked up.

A fair trade.

He smiled at the thought.

After finishing his morning workout, he started heading to the guild alone. On the way, a random thought struck him.

'I'll go to Mira's house tonight to pick up my clothes. Then tomorrow night, I'll go drop off hers.'

'And the day after that... hmm... Elfman should be back soon. I'll need a new excuse to stop by then.'

'Maybe I'll tell her Warm can do a backflip now. That sounds convincing enough. She'll definitely come see that.'

He was still planning excuses in his head when he arrived at the guild's front gate.

Leaning against the wall just outside the entrance was Cana. Her hair was a mess, her clothes looked like she'd slept in them, and she was holding an almost-empty bottle of booze above her mouth, trying to coax out the last few drops.

Only a thin trickle came out, which she quickly licked off her lips.

"Finally someone is here," Cana muttered, spotting him. "I thought the Magic Council had banned the whole guild or something."

"When'd you get back?" Rhodes asked, pulling out the key to open the gate and unlock the front hall door.

"Last night," she replied, yawning. "I passed out in front of my place. Woke up this morning and realized half my wine spilled, so I figured I'd raid the guild stash."

Did she seriously pass out on her own doorstep before even opening the door? And then roll straight into the guild the next morning without even freshening up, just to get more booze?

Rhodes rubbed his temple. "Falling asleep outside your own house… you're really something else."

Cana just shrugged, clearly unfazed.

"Where's Loke?" Rhodes asked.

"That flaky guy? He popped back to the Celestial Spirit Realm the moment our mission wrapped. Said he'll come back and hang out after taking a break."

"Did you stir up any trouble this time?" Rhodes raised an eyebrow. "Like sticking your wine tab on the Council again or forgetting to pay?"

Cana scoffed. "You make it sound like I cause trouble every time. I'm not Natsu, okay? Besides, the Council's still sorting itself out after that last mess. The tavern wouldn't even accept their name on credit."

Rhodes blinked. "Wait. You actually tried to charge it to the Council?"

He was just teasing her about her past stunts, he hadn't expected her to actually go for it.

"Don't bring it up." Cana waved it off like it was no big deal. "Anyway, the debt's not my problem. No one chased me down, so I call that a win."

She followed Rhodes to the front counter, plopped herself on the nearest stool without checking if it was even clean, and slammed her hand on the tabletop.

"Come on, bring the wine already! I've been waiting forever. Take it out of my mission reward."

Her last job had been alongside Erza, taking down a Dark Guild. The reward money was still being processed by Fairy Tail, so technically, she was still broke.

Rhodes sighed. "Hold on. I'll go check the kitchen."

"There's a whole rack of bottles over there," Cana said, pointing lazily. "If you don't hurry, I'm grabbing one myself."

"Those aren't for mornings," Rhodes called back. "Sit tight."

"Tch. Like time of day matters when drinking," she muttered. Still, she stayed put.

A moment later, Rhodes returned with a small clay wine jar tucked under his arm and a plate of snacks balanced in his other hand.

He set down a dish of crispy Poro treats and held the wine jar protectively. "Eat something first. No drinking on an empty stomach."

"Are all guys with girlfriends this thoughtful?" Cana muttered to herself, grabbing a round biscuit-like treat and crunching into it.

"Already ate. Gimme the wine," she said with a full mouth.

Rhodes poured a modest amount into a small cup. "This is Mr. Cook's rice wine. Warms your stomach and helps shake off fatigue."

Cana gave the drink a curious sniff. It smelled sweet and smooth. A bit light for her usual taste, but after taking a sip, she couldn't deny how good it was.

She ate a few more Poro snacks, sipped another cup of rice wine, and let out a deep sigh.

'Sure, I can drink wherever I want out there. No rules, no nags. But somehow, drinking here at the guild just felt better.'

...

Bonus @1600

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