Eternally Yours

Perched by her window, knees drawn to her chest, she sat, watching and waiting. The sound of the front door slamming made her jump. Curiosity won over fear as she crept to her bedroom door, barefoot, cracking it open just enough to peer into the hallway.

Her mother stood in the foyer, cutting an imposing figure in her tailored suit. Even from this distance, Hana can see the mid-length brown-colored hair that she shared with her.

A maid, hurries toward her mother, wringing her hands nervously. “Ma’am, the young miss’ friend is here to see her.”

Mira’s stories of her school always brought her life, as opposed to her mundane home-schooling life. Her fingers gripped the doorframe tighter as she prepared to step out.

“Tell her Hana isn’t feeling well.” The words are clipped, and precise. “I don’t want that girl in this house. Have I made myself clear?”

The maid’s head bobbed up and down, her voice trembling. “Yes ma’am.”

Her hope withered as quickly as it had come. Hana barged out the doors to confront her mother.

“Mother, why did you send Mira away? How could you do that?” Her voice trembled with a boldness she rarely showed.

Mrs. Shizumi turned sharply, her eyes narrowing. “Hana Shizumi, do not raise your voice at me! I– ”

“You sent Mira away. She is my friend”

“And a distraction,” her mother cut in, voice cold as steel. “I have let you play house for way too long.”

Tears pricked at the corners of Hana’s eyes. “She is my friend. My only friend. Why do you keep shutting me away?”

“I am your mother, mind your voice. You will not be seeing her again. You and her are not of the same caliber. I should have separated this ‘friendship’ long before now. She is starting to rub off on you.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Exactly what I said.” Her mother’s posture remained rigid, unyielding. “You are bound to go separate ways sooner or later. You need to start thinking about the future.”

“Mother, please…”, Hana reached out instinctively, desperate to bridge the growing chasm between them.

Mrs. Shizumi jerked away as if burned, her usual composure cracking for just a moment. Hana’s heart plummeted at the harsh reaction, her outstretched hand falling limply to her side. That fear… was a look she would never forget.

“Mother…”

The word came out as barely a whisper.

Mrs. Shizumi covered her reaction with a cough, folding her arms across her chest like a shield. Her eyes fell to Hana’s bare hands with obvious disapproval.

“Where are your gloves? Didn’t I tell you to always wear them?” She straightened her jacket, retreating behind her wall of propriety. “Hana, I can’t deal with you at the moment. Your tutor should be here soon.”

Through blurring vision, she watched her mother’s heels clicking against the floor - always walking away, always putting distance between them.

*******************

She felt herself thrown involuntarily into the memory, all the emotions hitting her at once. She didn’t understand her mother’s actions, but she understood loneliness. It settles around her like a familiar blanket, heavy and suffocating.

She wondered time and time again why her mother seemed so determined to keep her world as empty as this house.

She ought to speak softly, maintain proper posture, and be the perfect Shizumi daughter her mother demanded. And she must wear her gloves.

The habit of wearing gloves had become as natural as breathing. It wasn’t to protect her but others.

“Hana...”

The words felt inadequate even as Ren spoke them, but he needed to say something, anything.

The hospital rooftop was quiet except for the distant hum of the city below and the soft sound of her ragged breathing. He didn’t respond, lost in her thoughts as the wind whipped her hair across her tear-stained face. When Ren reached out to pat her head, the gesture foreign yet somehow natural, she flinched instinctively. But she didn’t pull away.

“She is sick… Cancer” Hana’s voice cracked, the words tumbling out between shaky breaths. “I’m such a mess. I’m such a horrible person, I couldn’t see… her. I didn’t want to… I…”

“You don’t have to say anything”

Hana lifted her face towards him, and Ren felt his chest tighten at the sight of fresh tears gathering in her eyes.

“Dr. Jenkins...” Her voice was barely a whisper. “Is my mom going to die?”

The question hit Ren like a physical blow. The pieces suddenly clicked into place He was used to delivering difficult news to patients and their families, and had mastered the art of professional detachment. But this was different. This was Hana.

“I don’t know.”

The words felt heavy on his tongue, but he couldn’t bring himself to offer false hope or empty platitudes. Not to her. He didn’t even know the situation in question well enough.

He stared at her for what felt like a whole minute, then he shifted, his decision made.

“I need to step away for a moment. I will be right back.” His voice carried a note of concern. “Can you promise me not to do anything dangerous?”

Hana barely registered his words, lost in the turbulent sea of her thoughts. Her lack of response worried him, but he had to trust she would be okay for a few minutes.

Then she was alone. The reality of her situation crashed over her like a wave - her mother, the woman she had successfully avoided for six years, was just floors below her. The confrontation she had pushed to some nebulous future had suddenly become terrifyingly present. She had convinced herself she’d moved past it all, but now she realized she’d only been running, avoiding, hiding. What was she supposed to do now that she couldn’t run anymore?

The sudden weight of fabric around her shoulders startled her from her thoughts.

“Dr. Jenkins...” she murmured, surprised by his return.

“It’s a chilly night.” His voice was matter-of-fact but held an underlying gentleness. “I wouldn’t want to risk making you sick.”

“Thank you.” The words came out soft, almost lost in the wind.

She sighed deeply, pulling his jacket closer. The uniquely familiar scent of him wrapped around her like a protective shield.

“I left home right before college,” she began, the words tumbling out before she could stop them. “More like, I ran away.”

Something about his quiet attention gave her the courage to continue.

“My mother and I were never on the same page about many things.” Her voice trembled slightly. “Every time she looked at me, I saw fear in her eyes. I never understood why at first, but now...” She stared down at her gloved hands, “...I do.”

“I guess it is time for me to face it. I have avoided her long enough, but probably not tonight... not tonight...” Her voice trailed off as another realization hit her. “Tonight! The dinner. Dr. Jenkins, I am so sorry”

Ren watched as guilt and distress crossed her features, adding to the burden she was already carrying. Something in his chest tightened at how quickly she shifted from her pain to concern about disappointing him.

“Shizumi, it’s okay.” He tried to inject a hint of lightness into his voice, hoping to ease her worry. “I would say that makes us even. There will be other times for that.”

“But...” she started to protest, her fingers twisting anxiously in the fabric of his jacket.

“It’s okay Shizumi. It’s not your fault.” The dinner seemed trivial now, in light of everything else. He had even forgotten about that. Besides, he had his impromptu surgery to account for.

In those moments, Ren felt a sense of closeness form between them both.

Hana revealed a part of herself that even Mira didn’t know to Dr. Jenkins and she felt comfort radiant from him giving her assurance.

The walls she’d carefully maintained softened under the gentle acceptance in his eyes. Dr. Jenkins wasn’t just her supervisor anymore; he was Ren, someone who saw her struggles and didn’t turn away. Just at that moment with him by her side, she could almost believe everything would be okay.

**********************************

“Thank you for taking time out, Dr. Ajavon. I’m also glad that I caught you before you left.”

“You are lucky, I just clocked out for the day,” Dr. Ajavon replied with a tired smile.

“We should get coffee sometime. My treat.”

“I’ll hold you to that, Rowan.”

“Definitely—” Rowan broke off mid-sentence, spotting a familiar figure. “Ren, what are you doing in these parts of the hospital? Shouldn’t you be off duty now?”

Ren stood there, looking somewhat distracted and unusually tense. “I had an impromptu surgery. But, I have to go now.” The last thing he needed was Rowan’s curiosity

A mischievous glint appeared in Rowan’s eyes. “Why the rush? Someone’s waiting for you?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“Rowan now is not the time.” Ren’s tone carried a warning edge.

“Wow, you aren’t denying it. Fine, fine. I won’t hold you from getting to her.” Rowan’s grin widened, clearly enjoying the moment.

Their companion, sensing the shift, gracefully excused himself from the situation. “I think I should leave you two to your discussion.”

“Have a good night” “I’ll text you concerning the coffee,” both doctors responded.

Before Rowan could turn his attention back to him, Ren seized the opportunity to escape quickly down the corridor.

“Ren—” Rowan called after him, “And he’s gone.”

A thought suddenly struck him as he watched Ren’s retreating figure. “I just remembered having a patient with the same name as Shizumi. Weird.”

He shrugged, his mind already moving on. “Anyways, I should also prepare for my night shift. Oh! I wonder if my princess is in her office.”