Chapter 36 – Lilith and Maria
Mira was shy, but she still replied naturally to Luna, "You dare?"
"Why not?" Luna asked with interest.
Mira was speechless until she heard a laugh on the other side. She felt helpless and didn't realize how she was getting soft towards Luna.
"Alright, now you're laughing at me?"
"No, I'm not," Luna denied with a smile.
"Really?"
"Really."
Then there was a silence. After a while, Luna and Mira laughed together.
"Let's talk later, I'll just finish these."
"Okay, take a rest later."
"En."
"Bye."
"Bye."
Luna lay on Mira's bed, then she faced the pillow until she couldn't breathe. Thinking about how she was getting along well with Mira now, and the way Mira talked to her gently and laughed made her blush. Even if she couldn't see Mira's face, she could already imagine how Mira looked just from the way she talked. She remembered how gentle Mira was when she was looking at the flowers at the university before. At that time, she just thought she wanted Mira to look at her the way she looked at those flowers.
She was aware of the changes in her feelings for Mira. Although at the beginning, she didn't think too much about it, but as time passed, certain realizations made her aware that her interest in Mira was not just because she wanted to be friends. And this feeling just kept getting stronger even though that person was on the other side of the world.
Luna touched her heart, which was beating too fast. She couldn't wait to meet Mira again, but at the same time, she was nervous that Mira might find out her feelings. But since they were just getting started with their careers, she wanted to focus on that while also preparing herself on how to pursue Mira.
Luna was engrossed in her world until she heard a doorbell. She immediately stood up and set aside her sweet imagination. She slowly opened the door and went out. She lowered her body so she wouldn't be seen from the second floor, and since everything could be heard from up there, she decided to just listen. 'It's not like I want to eavesdrop, I just want to make sure they won't hurt each other.'
...
Maria opened the door and saw Lilith. She was stunned to see how Lilith had changed over the past few years, although she had already seen Lilith on graduation day. But seeing her up close took her back to the old days when Lilith would smile at her, how Lilith would cause some little trouble just to tease her. The person she wanted but who turned her back on her.
For a moment, Maria wanted to cry and let Lilith see how miserable she was when she left her, but she quickly shook this idea away. She stepped aside and walked inside without a word, with the clear meaning of letting Lilith inside.
Lilith had decisively gone to Maria's house at first, but when she was at her door, she became nervous. She tried to steel herself and knocked twice. She thought that if Maria didn't open the door within a minute, she would leave, but she didn't expect that Maria would quickly open the door as if she knew she was coming.
The moment she saw Maria, all the hatred, doubts, confusion, and conflicted feelings she had were washed away. And when she saw Maria open the door widely and walk away without a word, she got scared. She quickly got inside and closed the door, then she hugged Maria tightly from behind.
Everything happened so quickly that Maria was shocked and her body became stiff. She tried to struggle away from Lilith, but when she held Lilith's wrist to push her away, she noticed how thin Lilith was and couldn't bring herself to use too much force, afraid that Lilith might get hurt.
"Ari... I'm sorry," Lilith said in a hoarse voice as she cried. Everything she wanted to say became nothing.
Maria couldn't hold back her tears. How long had she been waiting for her? How long had she been praying to see her? She looked up, trying to hold back her tears, but it only took Lilith's apology for her to break all her defenses because deep inside, that's the only thing she wanted to hear. No matter how angry she was, no matter how she tried to hate her, in the end, it only took one word.
"Ari..." Lilith called again. She loosened her embrace of Maria and wanted to kneel down to ask for forgiveness.
Maria saw through Lilith and didn't let her kneel down. She pulled Lilith onto the sofa. After a minute, she had already calmed down a little. She brought a glass of water for Lilith.
Lilith felt at a loss. She thought if she saw Maria again, she would be able to say everything she wanted to say, but in the end, only one thought remained in her mind, that everything was her fault. She kept apologizing, and whenever she saw Maria getting up to go to the kitchen to get some water or food, she would get scared that she might not be able to see Maria again if she let her go, so whenever Maria went, Lilith followed.
Maria realized that something was wrong with Lilith. She thought after they calmed down, they could finally talk, but the way Lilith followed her and kept an eye on her made her uncomfortable.
Maria knocked the table to get Lilith's attention. "Ask me whatever you want, I'll answer it."
Lilith, who had finally calmed down, was still paying attention to Maria. Then she also remembered what she wanted to say and asked, "Did you... fall in love with him?"
Maria didn't expect this question, but she still answered honestly, "No."
Lilith wasn't used to Maria's cold treatment towards her. "At that time... what happened?"
Maria just kept staring at Lilith. "I was drugged and caught off guard," she answered.
Lilith frowned and got angry. To herself, she clenched her fist so tightly that her nails almost pierced her skin.
Maria noticed and quickly held Lilith's hand to prevent her from hurting herself. She was too softhearted.
Lilith stopped questioning Maria as she realized that it was useless to ask now. She didn't know if she should explain herself or not because if she explained, she felt like she was just making excuses.
"Why did you turn your back on me?" Maria asked straightforwardly, still holding Lilith's hand.
Lilith hesitated for a moment, then she closed her eyes as she answered, "At that time, I planned to confess to you that day, but I couldn't contact you until one of his friends told me to go to X hotel because you were there. But... I was like struck by thunder when I saw you with him... I- I don't know what to say at that time. My mind went blank and I only thought that the person I liked was with someone else. But when I calmed down, I tried every means to get in touch with you, to talk to you to know what happened, but I was blocked. He said it's what you wished. I didn't want to believe him, but after multiple attempts and failures... I- I just thought maybe he was right."
Maria remained silent. That man had also said it before, but she was still disappointed because of the way Lilith looked at her at that time. But thinking about it now, if Lilith really had feelings for her at that time, then it was understandable. Nevertheless, she felt good knowing Lilith had feelings for her before.