Echoes of Ceotir

“Finn, how well do you remember your mother?”

He stared at his father’s sombre face, he hadn’t been expecting that question. It wasn’t a topic they ever talked about and it seemed so disconnected from his current problems or situation. Keira seemed to decide this was in fact too personal a topic so she interjected while standing up.

“This sounds like a conversation we shouldn’t be a part of,” she pulled on William who stood as well.

“It’s okay Keira, I don’t mind as long as Dad doesn’t.” His father shook his head signalling it was okay and they both sat back down. “Honestly, I don’t remember much, she died when I was young, a few years before the evacuation. I can vaguely remember what she looked like but that’s about it.”

“I thought that might be the case,” he said, opening the pack in front of him. “And you don’t remember how she died?”

“No—I don’t think we’ve ever really talked about it. I guess the evacuation of the island overshadowed that as I got old enough to put any real thought into it.”

His father pulled a small knife out of the pack, it looked as plain and simple as all the artefacts in the shrine had which made all three of them stare at it. Finlay’s gaze held longer than the other two as there was something about the knife that touched him. It was talking or drawing him in as the other artefacts, this was a memory, a nostalgia that he had seen before but long forgotten.

“It was your mother's and it’s exactly what you’re thinking it is.”

“She was a member of the guild?” Keira responded before he could.

“Yes, a powerful one at that, but when we fell in love she gave up that life and we moved to the island to escape it.”

He reached a hand forward to touch the knife but hesitated at the last moment. “How did she die?”

“In truth, we don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know?”

“There’s a part of me that hoped you’d be able to tell me. Now that you're older, I thought might remember. Though there's another part that hopes it stays forgotten—for your sake.”

“I don’t understand, why would I remember? I don’t remember anything.”

“The truth is Finn, your mother took you and your sister out swimming one day. There’s a pool below a waterfall, it’s beautiful, and it was a favourite spot of hers. But that day, she never returned.”

“The one you told me about?” Keira said, her voice barely a whisper as she looked at Finlay.

He turned to her, his hand still held in front of the knife but unable to move. “I remember that place, I remember being there. We were swimming, laughing, I told Keira I’d show her when we got there.”

“This is part of the reason I wanted to talk to you before you went. I’m not sure if going there will trigger some memories, but if it does, they might not be what you were expecting.”

He looked back at his father. “What happened there?”

“Like I said, we don’t know. She took you there but when she never returned, I went looking for you all,” he was struggling to get the words out. He turned away from all of them and rubbed his head before continuing.

“I found you by the water covered in blood... It was everywhere and there was no sign of your mother.”

Keira let out an audible gasp and William leaned back as if he were trying to get further away from the conversation without disrupting it. But Finlay couldn’t move and his mind was in a strange fog. He couldn’t remember it, not the blood, nor his mother. The only image that came to mind when he thought of that place was one of happiness, of his sister laughing and enjoying herself.

“Your sister was still in the water but…” It seemed that every word was a struggle for him to push out but he kept going. “It was just as bad, the pool was red but she was—”

“Laughing,” Finlay finished the thought.

They both looked at one another as the memory appeared in his mind. “The laughter that I remember was hers but it wasn’t a happy moment. She was laughing but I was crying and there was blood everywhere.”

“That’s how I found you both. There was no sign of your mother but your sister was holding this.”

“She had the artefact?”

“In its current state, the guild confirmed later that there was no longer any trace of the spirit inside. It’s just a dull knife now.”

He grabbed the knife expecting to feel something as he had with the other artefacts but just as his father said, there was nothing. But as soon as he lifted it, he felt a sharp pain in his chest that made him clutch it with his free hand.

Keira touched his shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, the spirit’s gone,” he put the knife down. “I just felt a sudden pain in my chest, probably stress, shock or something.”

At that moment there was another sensation, the spirit in the amulet seemed to wake up and he could feel its warmth and the gentle thud of its heartbeat against him. The pain subsided and he took a deep breath before giving her a reassuring smile.

“Of course, I kept looking for her," his father continued. "I got the guild involved. There was an investigation but we couldn’t find anything. No trace of her, no trace of any demons, nothing.”

“Why was she laughing,” now his memory had cleared he couldn’t get that image out of his head. “Did she say anything afterwards?”

“The doctor told me it was a shock response, she—like you, couldn’t remember anything.”

“I’m sorry Dad, I can’t imagine how hard that was for you.”

“I won’t lie and say it was easy, but you were a good kid, always have been.”

The only thing he could think of was that memory. He had always been a fond memory, a time when he believed he had been playing with his sister in that beautiful place but it was incomplete. There was a hidden truth behind it that was horrifying. With that, he couldn't help but question something else about her.

“Dad, there’s something I haven’t told you,” he looked back at Keira who smiled at him knowing what he was talking about. “I wasn’t sure if it was really that important but now, I’m starting to think I’ve been in denial.”

“Now’s as good a time as any—”

“Who’s having the duck?” The waitress had appeared with their orders.

William raised his hand in a tentative manner and they all laughed and took their meals, thanking her. It was better to eat, it gave him a moment to think and the warmth of the food was calming. After they all slurped at their food for a moment, enjoying the brief break, he continued.

He explained there was one part of his experience in the sanctuary he left out. The memories he had seen and at the end, the memory of his sister and what she had said to him. His father was in obvious shock but seemed to try and hold it together. It was dawning on all of them that there was something more going on with the situation and his sister than he really wanted to believe.

“She couldn’t have known, Finn. It’s not possible,” his father said.

“I can’t explain it either, but I know what I saw and there’s no doubt.”

“But are you sure? That thing was messing with your mind, your memories, couldn’t it have just made them up?”

“This was right at the end, this was the final thing I saw. It had been beaten by then.”

They fell silent with only the slurping of noodles and background chatter of the now busy restaurant to break it. He didn’t even know what to think about all of this. The image he had of his sister laughing in the pool, the image of them enjoying a swim on a hot day was tainted by the reality of blood and death. But that image was not just hard to accept but to understand and while he might have accepted her response was shock before, combining it with the knowledge she knew of the attack changed everything.

“The events happened years apart, right?” William was the one to break the silence between them. “I don’t mean to be rude or anything…”

“It’s fine, say what you’re thinking,” Finlay replied.

“I was wondering if there were any other unusual behaviours? With your sister I mean.”

He looked at his father who was peering into his bowl, toying with the food inside as he searched for an answer. He tried to think of a time himself but nothing came to mind. He always felt close to his sister, and as far as he could remember there was nothing strange about her. But that reality wasn’t the case any more, there were at least two occasions when she was being very strange and he had forced those memories out of his mind in different ways.

“I don’t even trust myself to remember any more. I blank out the worst parts of my mother's death and all I can remember is my sister laughing for years. Then I completely shut out her telling me we were going to be attacked the same day we had to flee our home—who knows what else I’ve forgotten.”

“Don’t blame yourself,” replied Keira. “It’s natural you’d block out some of those parts and that morning, it was so insignificant there’s no way you’d remember it against everything that happened.”

“She’s right, there’s no point in beating yourself up, Finn,” said his father. “And to answer the question, no, not really. She was sometimes withdrawn, sometimes kept to herself more than you’d expect but she had lost her mother in some unknown traumatic way so I always assumed it was to be expected.”

“Right, of course. Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”

“Do you think it would be worth asking Faye?” Keira said.

“I doubt she’d know anything.”

“You reacted to the knife, not like you were expecting but there was something there.”

“Ronan might be better to ask,” said William.

“True, but even then, I’m not sure either would know. I think it was probably just a painful memory that I had forgotten coming back to me. There’s no spirit inside that knife any more, whatever happened to it, it’s gone now.”

“I’m sorry Finn. I had hoped this might give us some more answers but it looks like it’s just opened up more questions,” said his father.

“Don’t be. I’m glad you told me. If we had gone to that waterfall and then I remembered it all and freaked out, it might have been a bigger problem.”

They continued to eat their food in silence. His father tried to change the subject by asking Keira how she was doing and she explained the difficulty she had. William often chimed in to defend her and point out that she was doing exceptionally well and no one could keep up with her which seemed to make his father happy as well.

He struggled to focus on much as his mind was wandering. He wanted answers, wanted to remember what happened. He was there, he must have seen what happened, seen how his mother died and why he and his sister were left covered in blood. But as he thought about it; he could hear her laughter, he could see her in the red-stained water—not just standing there but practically dancing. She was swinging the knife around as though it were a trophy; it wasn’t normal, no matter what had taken place he couldn’t justify that kind of reaction.

When they finished their meal they sat for a while longer but as it got later it was time for his father to leave. They walked him back to the station and he hugged Keira and said goodbye to William. In the end, he turned to Finlay and pulled him into a long embrace.

“I know it’s a lot to take on, try not to think the worst and try not to dwell over it. At the end of the day, it’s all in the past and nothing can change that now. I only wanted you to be ready for what you might see there and more importantly, what you might remember.”

“Thank you, I mean it. You’re right, it is a lot but I’ll be okay. If I think of anything else, If I remember anything, I’ll call you.”

He pulled back from his father and they released one another. “Be safe,” he looked at the other two. “That goes for all of you, be safe out there, don’t do anything reckless.”

He pulled the bag from his shoulder and handed it out to Finlay. “You should take this. I’ve been holding onto it for years but I think it’s time to let go. Maybe it’ll help you find some answers out there.”

“Are you sure? You didn’t bring much back from the island, to save this, it obviously means a lot.”

“It’s fine, I don’t need trinkets to remember your mother. She’s in my heart. I only hoped that it might give me answers one day.”

“Then I’ll take it and when we go to the island, and I’ll do what I can to try and remember. I’ll find out what really happened that day.”

“Thank you.”

They hugged one last time and said their final farewells before he left. The three took a longer route back to the apartments as the night air was cool and walking helped clear his mind. No one had specifically decided to suggest it but they all seemed to be on the same page about it. When they arrived, William stopped them before their usual parting.

“Today was important, and very personal.”

“I’m sorry, William. Maybe it was too much for you to be there.”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying. I wanted to thank you. I appreciate you letting me in like that.”

Keira slung an arm around his shoulder and his face immediately turned bright red. “Don’t be silly, we’re a party now, we share all our horrible secrets.”

Finlay smiled. “It’s true, you’re part of our little posse, and there’s no escaping Keira once that happens.”

“Thanks, I’m really glad I found you both. I don’t know what I’d have done if I hadn’t.”

“We’re the ones that should be thanking you, no one else wants anything to do with the necklace boy who’s loved by Faye and Ronan.”

“They’re as put off by you as they are me, thanks.”

They laughed and with that parted, William returned to his apartment and as per usual, Keira followed him into his. Though this time, he was more thankful for that than she likely was for him. He was feeling exhausted at both an emotional and physical level; not from the training but from the conversation and realities they had faced. It all felt too much and as soon as he got inside, he flung himself onto his bed.

“Don’t think the worst, Finn.”

He rolled onto his side. “What are you talking about?”

“I know you. You’re thinking there’s some big mystery, some secret. That you didn’t really know your sister, or that there was something darker going on with the demons and her. You’re probably thinking all kinds of ridiculous theories about her and your mother.”

“It’s possible…”

“Well that’s what I’m saying, don’t do that.”

“Easier said than done.”

“You loved her, Finn. I’ve seen you, helped you on her birthday every year. You loved her and you wouldn’t love someone who didn’t deserve it, who wasn’t good. So have faith in yourself as much as anything.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

She punched him in the shoulder.

“Why?” He complained, rubbing it.

“I’m serious. Whatever happened, it was a long time ago. Remember her well, as a good person—as your sister. It was a long time ago; like your father said, don’t worry about the rest.”

“Okay I get it, but I still feel I owe it to my dad to try and figure out what happened back then.”

“That’s fine, but don’t go getting yourself in any stupid situations again to do that.”

“Alright alright, I won’t.”

“Good,” she fell down onto the mattress that had become her bed. “I’m here if you need to talk.”

“Thanks, but honestly, I just want to sleep.”

“Good, because I'm exhausted.”

“Goodnight, Keira.”

"Goodnight."