Dusk (BL Light Novel)

We went down to the parking lot to load the luggage into the trunk, but Gang Jaegyung insisted on carrying his own bags into the car, saying he didn’t want to make things unnecessarily inconvenient when getting out. Hearing that, I quietly pulled a small bundle of coupons from the paper bag and slipped them into my left pocket. I had the ticket with the number in my right pocket, and if there was any rustling sound while taking the coupons out, it’d be obvious to Gang Jaegyung.
So, with deliberate precision, I got into the car on the left, and led Gang Jaegyung to take the seat on the right. If he happened to see me pulling out the coupons, that would completely ruin the moment—like sneezing into a finished dish—so I had to be careful.

With that innocent look of his, completely unaware of anything, Gang Jaegyung beamed as he ~Nоvеl𝕚ght~ gave my uncle the neighborhood and building name when asked for the address. According to the arrival time on the GPS, it really wasn’t far from here, just like he said. Not that far from my place either.
“You live closer to my house than I thought.”
Well, closer than I thought, anyway.

As I murmured that to myself after hearing the address, Gang Jaegyung fastened his seatbelt and asked curiously,
“Where do you live, Go Yeong?”
“Not telling you.”

If he knew, he’d definitely hit me up to hang out every time he was nearby. Even if it took an hour by public transport, there’s no way someone as energetic as Gang Jaegyung would get lazy and not come. Besides, he got rejected after asking to hang out today—he’s not the type to give up just because a day or two passes. And if he did give up easily, well, that would be bittersweet in its own way...
Contrary to my expectation that he’d pester me to tell him and make things awkward, Gang Jaegyung just let it go with a look that made his disappointment more than obvious.
To avoid a lull in the conversation, I tossed him a new topic.

“Did you go to college around here?”
“Nope? I told you I graduated from a sports university. I only came to Seoul because of work.”
“Oh.”

Now that I think about it, there isn’t a sports university nearby. I don’t think Daehan University even has a Department of Security. If someone like Gang Jaegyung had gone there, word would’ve spread through our department ages ago about some hot guy in Security.
While I was quietly convincing myself of that, Gang Jaegyung started up the engine—of torment.
“You said you always watch my streams and you forgot I went to a sports college? You’re neglecting me too much.”

“What, you think I sit around watching your stream all day or something?”
…I do.
“I only watch it now and then, when I have nothing else to do.”

“Since you’ve got nothing to do besides playing games with me, you just end up cycling through my stream every time. Which basically is all day. Right?”
…Right.
“Are you embarrassed of me? Why can’t you just say you like me?”
“I am embarrassed…”

With my head hanging low, I buried my face in my hands, and from my right side I heard Gang Jaegyung mumbling something under his breath. I mean, it’s embarrassing—what self-respecting guy in his twenties watches another guy’s stream all day, saying his voice is nice?
Without knowing the full story, Gang Jaegyung just put on his best crocodile tears and claimed to be hurt. Though honestly, he was probably laughing inside, thinking this was all so amusing.
“Oh, when you mentioned college earlier, I got curious.”

Suddenly, Gang Jaegyung leaned far over toward my seat, pressing a hand to the cushion. He was still wearing his seatbelt, so it looked awkward, but his face was totally relaxed.
“What college do you go to, Go Yeong?”
Go to, huh. I already dropped out, so it feels weird to say I “go” there...

“Daehan University.”
“…You do?”
The look of disbelief on his face made me let out a breath of laughter. Do I look that much like a delinquent who can’t study? Everyone reacts the same way when I say I went to Daehan. Maybe it’s the hair dye.

“I worked hard, you know?”
“Still, I never would've guessed Daehan level.”
‘So I totally toyed with a Daehan student in round two?’—that smug mouth of his, I wanted to smack it. Brainy bastard only ever does shit that makes you want to hit him.

“I was only good at studying, just studying.”
“Yeah, that tracks.”
Can I just punch him once?

Almost like he read my mind, Gang Jaegyung timed his retreat with comic perfection.
“So that’s why you live around here.”
“Well, calling it around here is a stretch. It’s at least a 30-minute drive.”

“Then it’s not close at all.”
His voice sounded genuinely disappointed. Definitely the type of guy who’d try to show up near my place just to hang out if he knew where I lived.
“I said it was closer than I thought, never said it was super close. And it’s across the river, so the distance isn’t that bad, just the route’s annoying.”

“You live in Gangnam?”
“Close enough.”
“Your race got split in Dusk, and now in real life it’s North and South. Fascinating.”

“If you’re gonna compare it to races, don’t use Gangnam and Gangbuk—make it South and North Korea.”
“Then we wouldn’t be able to play games together.”
And he pulled that pathetic, guilt-tripping expression again. Made it impossible to say anything.

We kept tossing petty jabs back and forth for a bit more until Gang Jaegyung suddenly stopped mid-sentence, seemed to spot something outside, and told my uncle to drop him off nearby.
Soon after, the car came to a stop, and just before I stepped out to walk him to the door, I remembered the coupon and pulled it from my pocket, clutching it in my right hand. As Gang Jaegyung opened the door and reached down to pick up his paper bag, I took that split-second window and slipped the coupon inside.
Thankfully, he didn’t notice a thing and stepped out without a clue. I followed him out of the car, satisfied. The click of the door shutting felt like music to my ears.

“Thanks for the ride. Thank you too, Go Yeong.”
“Yeah. Get home safe.”
“Honestly, I don’t want to go in…”

“Go.”
He keeps making me out to be some heartless bastard. Lowering his eyebrows dramatically, Gang Jaegyung spoke with determination.
“Don’t forget you said you’d treat me to something tasty next time.”

“Yeah, yeah.”
“You got that?”
“I got it.”

He was hammering that point home so hard I didn’t even say anything back—just waved him off. Idiot doesn’t even realize he’s hammering a nail into a piece of limp paper instead of wood.
Even as he walked away, Gang Jaegyung kept turning back like he still wasn’t ready to let go. I waved at him a few more times, and when it started to feel like dawn might break before he left, I shooed him off with exaggerated hand motions. Only then did he finally drag himself inside the building.
Once I made sure Gang Jaegyung got in safely, I got back in the car. Just being outside for a little while had made it stuffy, and stepping into the cool, air-conditioned interior was a relief.

My uncle, who’d watched me get back in, shifted gears and hesitantly spoke. In the rearview mirror, I saw his forehead scrunched up tight.
“Yeong-ah… that guy earlier…”
“Huh?”

That guy earlier? Gang Jaegyung?
It surprised me a bit to hear my uncle bring him up. He never mentioned my friends first—even when I had any. For him to bring up Gang Jaegyung now… was something bothering him?
But just as I expected—or maybe feared—he opened his mouth a bit, then shook his head.

“Never mind. Let’s go home.”
…There are two ways to piss someone off. One: start saying something and don’t finish.
I was curious what he wanted to say, but knowing my uncle, he wouldn’t just drop it without reason. So I stifled the curiosity, nodded silently, and pushed the thought out of my mind. Yeah. If it’s important, he’ll bring it up again.

***
After a long drive, we reached the apartment. I saw my uncle off and went inside alone. The place was completely dark—seemed like no one had come home yet. Then again, we all had our own places, and I was used to being alone. They only made the effort to come over when they worried I couldn’t handle it by myself.
I turned on the lights and checked the dining table. There was food laid out, probably left by the housekeepers.

I didn’t really have an appetite… but if I skipped a meal, my sister—who got all the updates—would throw a fit. So I had to eat something.
I put a few ice cubes in a small glass and crunched on them one by one as I walked to the large glass window in the living room. Leaning my head against it, I stared out at the darkening skyline.
The Han River had turned nearly black in the fading light. Somewhere beyond it was the neighborhood where Gang Jaegyung lived. I couldn’t see it—it was smaller than even the tiny dots of the city’s night lights—but maybe, just maybe, he was looking down at this side from over there too. The thought gave me a strange feeling. I knew he lived in Seoul, but I didn’t expect it to be this close. Korea really is tiny.

By the time I’d spaced out long enough to crunch all the ice and only melted water remained in the glass, I got a streaming notification on my phone. As soon as I saw it, I passed through the living room, set the glass on the dining table, and headed straight for my room.
I took off my outerwear and turned on my computer, opening the channel currently streaming. There was always a bit of setup time after the stream started, so at first it was nothing but music—but soon enough, a sweet, sugary voice started greeting everyone through my headset.