DMC: Being a demon hunter in Japan is not easy

"So, what do you think?" Ichika asked curiously, tilting her head.

"I'm trying to process it... it's a lot of information."

For over ten uninterrupted minutes, Ichika explained everything from her perspective—starting from the day Uesugi introduced himself as their tutor up until now. It was a full summary of events, along with details about her emotions and the reasoning behind her decisions.

For someone like Desmon, though, understanding all of this would just give him a headache.

"I think fighting demons is easier than listening to a girl talk..."

"Really? I tried to keep it as brief as possible." She said, resting a finger against the side of her lips.

"Hmmmm."

Ever since he started living alone, Desmon's life had been about eliminating targets and surviving on his own. Sure, there was a time when he had something resembling a mentor—someone who trained him and gave him a home—but it's not like two men would sit around discussing feelings and all that.

"Just to be sure, you're asking for my neutral opinion on your actions and decisions, right?"

Ichika pouted. "Haven't you been listening!?"

-And here I was, being so honest...

"Don't get mad. I just wanted to confirm." He replied with a shrug.

"So, what do you think, Desmon-kun?"

Ichika clenched her fist. She knew her actions had never been right—in fact, she could admit she'd been a terrible older sister. But still, there was a chance Desmon might have a different perspective...

"From a neutral standpoint, you're a terrible sister. If there were a competition for the worst older sister, you'd win by a landslide."

As expected, he gave his honest opinion.

"Hahaha... as blunt as ever." She said awkwardly.

-I figured as much... Everything I did was awful as a sister.

"You impersonated your sisters multiple times to deceive Uesugi and sabotage Miku. You also prevented another sister from making a move on the guy she liked. You played dirty countless times out of selfishness, and that's just scratching the surface. I could go on all day."

Desmon had only pointed out the highlights based on what he'd heard, but he could easily keep listing more.

"I get it, I get it... no need to repeat what I said." She muttered, averting her gaze.

-I really am the worst... but I already knew that. She gritted her teeth at the thought.

Hearing it from someone else hurt more than she expected—like Desmon was outright condemning her selfish behavior. Then again, this was exactly what she had wanted from the start.

"Your actions would be considered criminal in several countries." He said with a calm expression. "That's my neutral take. But I also have a personal opinion."

-Well... it can't possibly be worse than what he already said.

Ichika sighed and tried to force her usual confident smile, but it was a poor attempt. Desmon's words had hit her harder than she'd thought. But since she was the one who asked for this, she had no right to complain.

"Alright, let's hear it."

"You should've just kidnapped Uesugi and locked him up somewhere."

"Huh?"

Ichika could expect anything from Desmon, but she never saw that coming.

No sane person would ever ask for his opinion. Given the way he was raised, his ideas were the complete opposite of normal human ethics.

"If you want something, you take it. Simple as that." He said indifferently.

During the darkest period of his life, his actions couldn't exactly be called 'moral.' Even though he had changed, he still had some questionable thoughts. He just avoided acting on them now because the consequences were too much of a hassle.

If he wanted money, what was stopping him from robbing a bank? The police? That guy could massacre an entire country's law enforcement while barely breaking a sweat. But doing so would make him a national enemy, leaving him with no peace, and everyone would run from him.

Desmon defied human logic—his strength, endurance, and regeneration were beyond anything normal. He was a danger to anyone. But he wasn't some lunatic who killed people for no reason.

As long as he remained the same idiot he'd always been, he could still pass as just another teenager.

"Hold on a second, I don't think I heard you right." Ichika blinked several times, unable to process Desmon's words.

"If you really wanted Uesugi, you should've just taken him for yourself. A few ropes and a good hit to the back of the neck, and he's yours. What's so wrong with being selfish?"

"That's a crime!"

"It's only a crime if you get caught."

"You've got a point... No, wait—no! It's a crime because it's wrong!" Ichika nearly agreed with him.

-Is this guy even sane?

There was no way Ichika would ever do something so outrageous.

"If you'd prefer another method, you could manipulate Uesugi, make him feel like he's lost everything, and then become his guiding light. He'd grow as dependent on you as a pet."

On his way back from his first job as staff for Devil May Cry, Desmon made a stop in Manhattan, New York, where he spent several days assisting a certain police unit in tracking down criminals. Well, not that he was actually helpful—he just found it entertaining and had nothing better to do. And since the officers couldn't do much about him, they just let him be. Not like they had much of a choice.

That's why he knows a few techniques psychopaths use on their victims.

"That could—wait! No! That's another crime!"

-Did I make a mistake asking for his opinion?

"You're really demanding..." Desmon sighed. "Then, you could just eliminate him. If he's not yours, he won't be anyone else's."

Yeah... letting this guy participate in investigations on psychopaths was a mistake. He learned way too much about how those lunatics think.

"Your suggestions just keep getting worse! There's no way I could ever do something like that!!!"

Desmon's examples were only getting more extreme.

"If you haven't done anything like that, then what's the problem?" He shrugged.

"Huh?" She couldn't quite grasp what he was getting at.

"From what you told me, all you did was try to be a little more selfish this time. You liked someone and did your best to make him notice you. What's so wrong with that?"

"But... I did terrible things to my sisters!"

Little by little, Ichika's mask was slipping. She had expected Desmon to reprimand her, just like he had been doing from the start—not to support her decisions.

"If we ignore that demon showing up, the situation between you five was normal. People argue, especially siblings. So in the end, your actions didn't really have any lasting consequences," he said calmly.

"What are you implying?"

"It doesn't matter what you did—only how it turned out in the end. Or as they say, the means don't matter, only the results. And in your case, despite everything you did, you didn't get the guy. So in the end, none of it mattered."

Desmon's way of thinking was straightforward. That's exactly why he could stay so relaxed and unfazed by everything happening around him. Who cares if you go through tough times? As long as you survive, the problems will sort themselves out eventually.

Well, except for death. There's no fixing that.

-That doesn't make any sense... But why does it feel like it does?

Desmon's words should've sounded like nonsense to Ichika. She knew that. But the more she thought about it, the more they started making sense.

That was because of everything she had been through. Understanding that creatures existed that defied logic hadn't been easy. So, what was so wrong about Desmon's way of thinking?

"You're saying I should just ignore everything I did and act like it never happened?" She asked, unsettled.

"Not at all. If you did that, you'd be a psychopath."

"Huh!?"

This time, she genuinely had no idea how to take that.

"I'm not telling you to pretend it never happened. Just acknowledge it and move on with your life." Desmon glanced up at the sky.

"You're asking too much. It's like you want me to move on as if nothing happened, knowing what I did. That's way too selfish." She gave a fragile smile, as if she were moments away from breaking.

"What's wrong with being selfish?"

Those simple words were the final straw. It was as if Desmon hadn't listened to anything she had said—as if everything she had done had been meaningless, as if she hadn't hurt anyone at all.

"What's wrong with it? Everything! I'm the eldest sister—my priority is to take care of my sisters, to support them! But... when I started liking Uesugi-kun, I just couldn't suppress my feelings. I should have. I should have kept acting like I always did. I..."

"Baka."

Desmon flicked her forehead lightly with his fingers.

"Kya!"

-Is this what Nino felt? Ichika rubbed her aching forehead.

"As I said, you're making a big deal out of this." Desmon looked at her again, but this time, his expression turned serious. "You did a lot of bad things to your sisters, so what? Did you do it for no reason? You're not some lunatic who tried to ruin their lives just for fun. Everything you did was to get the guy you like. What's so wrong about that?"

"I… Kya!"

"I'm not done talking."

Since she was the eldest sister, Desmon gave her a second flick to the forehead.

-Isn't this too much? And why does it seem like he enjoys hitting me?

Ichika wanted to complain and let out her frustration, but Desmon's actions made that impossible.

"A lot happened, and maybe what you did wasn't the best, but things are fine now between you and your sisters. So there's no point in dwelling on the past. If you do, you won't be able to face the future."

-Who would've thought quoting lines from one of Shizuka's mangas would actually be useful?

"…Is it really okay for me to think that way?" She asked hesitantly.

-Is this girl stubborn or just plain dumb…?

Desmon was trying to get his point across, but Ichika just wasn't getting it. Then again, hardly anyone would.

"Look, if you had done something truly awful, like… I don't know, cutting off a limb from each of your sisters to attach them to yourself before kidnapping Uesugi or something, then yeah, you'd owe them a huge apology. But compared to that, you were just a little selfish. Honestly, it's kind of funny how he never realized you were impersonating one of your sisters." He spoke as if it was nothing.

Common morals and ethics didn't apply to Desmon. Expecting a rational response from him was asking too much.

-Why does he say such ridiculous things? What kind of comparison is that? …And the worst part is that, somehow, it's making me feel less guilty.

Bit by bit, the serious conversation turned into nonsense, making Ichika question if she had been overthinking everything. Her sense of morality and ethics was getting twisted by this problematic guy.

"…Alright, I think I get what you're saying." She sighed, giving up on trying to understand Desmon's logic.

-I didn't do anything so unforgivable that it can't be fixed with a simple apology to the others, so clinging to this guilt doesn't make sense… I think…

After reflecting on Desmon's words, Ichika arrived at a simple conclusion: There's no point in worrying about something from the past that's already been resolved. A predictable outcome if you take advice from someone like him—someone who lives simply without overcomplicating things.

"It's not that hard, is it?" Desmon stood up from the bench and stretched. "At the end of the day, you're the only one who decides how to live your life. If you can't do that, you're just an idiot." He said with a grin.

The doubts Ichika had at the start were gone—not because Desmon was particularly persuasive, but because the way he spoke made her problems seem trivial.

Making her feel like an idiot for not getting over them sooner.

"People who call others idiots are the real idiots, baka." She smiled calmly.

"I never said that, but if you felt called out, that's not my fault." He shrugged.

"You always have an answer for everything, don't you?" She pouted when her argument was shot down.

"I just say whatever comes to mind."

A simple guy with simple responses.

"I can tell. You have no filter when talking to people. You should learn to be more considerate, especially with girls." She scolded him.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it… Why does everyone keep telling me that?"

Desmon had lost count of how many times he'd heard that, but he was sure it was more than twice…

-I guess I could teach him a thing or two…

"Let's do this: I'll ask you some questions, and you have to tell me how you'd react in each situation."

Since Desmon had helped her, the least Ichika could do was help him deal with girls. Maybe it'd make things easier for him in the future.

"I don't mind." He nodded, in a good mood.

Ichika crossed her legs and cleared her throat, imitating a TV show host.

"Alright, let's start! 1- If a girl says she's cold, what do you do?"

"I tell her to find a store with heating."

2- "If a girl asks you for directions, what do you do?"

"I tell her to look it up on her phone."

3- "If a girl tells you she's feeling sad, what do you do?"

"I tell her to buy some ice cream to cheer up—and maybe get me one too."

4- "If a girl says her new dress looks ugly, what do you say?"

"If it's ugly, why did she buy it? Is she an idiot?"

5- "If a girl says, 'I'm fat,' what do you say?"

"I don't know—do you want a workout routine or a burger?"

6- "If a girl is mad at you and says, 'Do whatever you want,' what do you do?"

"I do whatever I want. Obviously."

7- "If a girl says, 'I'm not hungry,' but then takes your food, what do you do?"

"I take my food back and run for it."

8- "If a girl texts you 'Hi' and nothing else, what do you reply?"

"'Bye,' to keep things balanced."

9- "If a girl asks, 'What would you do if I disappeared one day?'"

"Depends. Did she owe me money?"

10- "If a girl asks, 'Do you remember what day it is today?' but you have no clue, what do you do?"

"I check my phone. It's probably a Friday."

With that last question, the room fell completely silent.

Ichika looked at Desmon with a complicated expression—or at least that's what her face showed.

"Desmon-kun, you were being honest with your answers, right?" She asked, looking troubled.

"Why would I lie? So, how'd I do?"

-Is this for real?

"You're terrible at understanding a girl's feelings." She sighed, completely drained after hearing his responses.

"You asked for honesty."

"You're right, that was my mistake… I completely forgot these questions wouldn't make sense…" Ichika started regretting bringing this up, but it only proved how much work she had ahead of her with him.

Expecting reasonable answers from Desmon was asking too much.

"Listen up, Desmon-kun. I'm going to answer some of these questions for you, so next time, think more about the other person and follow my lead. Got it?"

"Do I have to?"

"That wasn't a request." Her expression turned ominous.

Ichika took it upon herself to make sure Desmon learned how to deal with girls.

"Yes, ma'am!"

-Should I just jump off the rooftop? Desmon thought.

If you can't handle a girl, you can always run.

"If a girl says she's cold, offer her your jacket. If she asks for directions, explain the way and walk her there so she doesn't get lost. If she looks tired from walking or standing, support her or find a nice place to rest. If she asks how she looks today, tell her she looks as beautiful as always. Got it, Desmon-kun?"

"Do I have to?"

"It's the bare minimum! Be more considerate of girls, understood!?" She scolded him again.

"I'll keep it in mind…"

-Oh well, what do I have to lose? In the end, he gave in.

And with that, Ichika's lesson was over—though she had no idea that this would only lead to more problems and misunderstandings for the demon hunter.

"Can we eat now? I'm hungry."

"I have a question—or rather, I just want to satisfy my curiosity. Just answer honestly."

-Desmon-kun knows our situation, so it's not that awkward to ask him this.

"As long as it's not some school trivia, I don't mind.' He replied, uninterested.

Who would score higher on a test—Desmon or a grade schooler?

"If you were in Uesugi-kun's situation and had to choose one of us five as your girlfriend, who would you pick?"

Knowing how brutally honest Desmon was, Ichika was curious to hear his answer—especially since the guy in front of her wasn't exactly the most normal person.

Of course, out of the Nakano sisters, Desmon seemed to get along best with Miku, or at least that's what Ichika had noticed. So she expected him to lean toward her.

"None of you." He said firmly. "You're all way too much trouble, and I barely know anything about you."

Desmon might try to avoid trouble, but somehow, it always found him. Having these girls around would only take away his rare moments of peace.

"Yeah… I should've seen that coming…" Ichika sighed.

"It's only logical, isn't it? Why would I date someone I don't even know?"

Who in their right mind would go out with a girl they barely knew?

It might sound strange, but Desmon's view on relationships was shaped by what he learned as a kid. Since then, he'd never really had a chance to talk about it with anyone.

At least in that aspect, he was an idealist.

"Oh, that's a good point!" She said, surprised.

-It's strange hearing him say something that actually makes sense.

''Although, if I spoke from Uesugi's perspective, having known and interacted with all five of you for a long time, my answer would be easy.''

"And what would that be?" She asked, intrigued.

"I would choose all five of you.''

"Eh!?"

Choosing just one? Why would you, if you could have them all? Something so incredibly selfish that a normal person wouldn't even consider it.

Or at least, that's what he learned from hearing Shizuka complain about how some of the harem manga she reads end with the protagonist picking just one girl—too afraid to take the risk and go for all of them.

Japanese law prohibits polygamy, and dating five sisters would definitely be considered indecent, frowned upon by society. But that's not something Desmon really cares about.

In the end, someone as straightforward and selfish as Desmon would always go for everything rather than settle for just one. Of course, it all depended on how the girls responded.

"That's strange?"

"Of course it is! Choosing all five girls... though... I guess that is something you'd do."

After thinking about it for a moment, Ichika realized that if anyone would give that kind of answer, it would be Desmon.

"I don't see the problem."

"Maybe not, but the girls would probably beat you up for saying that." She nodded.

"Maybe you're right, but since it's something that'll never happen, I don't have to think about it."

Would multiple girls actually fall for a guy like that? To begin with, they'd have to be a little crazy themselves.

"That's one way to look at it." Ichika smiled softly, wishing the demon hunter luck.

Desmon simply shrugged in response.

With that, their conversation came to an end. It was time for lunch.

"So..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Like I promised, I'll treat you to lunch."

-He's not as unpleasant as I thought... he's actually a good guy.

Ichika extended her hand toward Desmon with a faint smile.

"Desmon-kun."

At that moment, he recalled the lesson Ichika had given him: he needed to be considerate toward a girl.

Ichika was reaching out her hand… what did that mean?

After thinking it through, the answer seemed obvious—she wanted help getting up from the bench.

As a gentleman, it was his duty to assist a lady. But what was the best way to do so?

Then, an idea crossed his mind, making him grin mischievously.

"You too? I guess that makes sense, since you're sisters."

Without warning, Desmon leaned down and lifted her into his arms, carrying her like a princess.

"What are you doing?!" Ichika yelled, completely caught off guard.

"Being considerate toward a girl. If you ask for help getting up, the best way is to carry you, don't you think?"

"You're twisting my words!"

"I don't think so."

The weather on the rooftop was perfect, with a refreshing breeze gently blowing. Desmon's hair moved with the wind.

Ichika, still in his arms, instinctively wrapped hers around his neck. From that angle, she had a clear view of the demon hunter.

Normally, the wind would make a girl's hair sway elegantly, making her look stunning—enough to steal anyone's heart. But, against all odds, the exact opposite happened.

"Something wrong?" Desmon asked in his usual tone, noticing that Ichika was staring at him.

"...It's nothing." She quickly looked away, feeling a slight blush rise to her cheeks.

-Why did I hesitate just now?

"Alright, time to head to the cafeteria." Desmon started walking.

"At least put me down first!" Ichika began pressing her finger against his cheek.

She tried to calm her thoughts and reason with him. Being carried like this had completely caught her off guard, and the worst part was that Desmon didn't even seem the least bit uncomfortable.

"I'm a gentleman. I can't let a tired girl walk."

"I'm not so tired that I can't walk..." She muttered, but then noticed the smirk on his face. "You're doing this on purpose!"

Desmon might seem like a fool or just plain clueless, but the truth was, sometimes it was hard to tell what went on in his mind. After all, he was a demon hunter… but he was also a teenager.

"Me? Who knows..." Desmon grinned playfully. "Hold on tight. I don't feel like waiting for the elevator or down the stairs, so we're taking the fastest route down."

He spoke so casually, yet kept walking toward the edge of the rooftop.

"You're not actually thinking of..."

-Is he really going to do it?!

"Bingo." He winked.

A terrible feeling washed over Ichika. Without thinking twice, she clung to him for dear life, as if her survival depended on it.

"Desmon-kun!!!"

And just like that, the two of them vanished from the rooftop.