Deities Are All Just My Food

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Sister Xiao Li and the others followed the fragrance as though they were famished wild dogs about to fight for food after half a month of hunger.

This was obviously not normal.

Lin Baici shouted several times but couldn't stop them and knew it was the Taboo things' mischief again.

Five minutes later, the group, panting for breath, charged into a large courtyard and stopped in front of a vegetarian hall.

Over the main entrance of the hall hung a signboard that read 'Xiang Ji Kitchen.'

"A dining hall?"

Lin Baici sniffed, it seemed like someone was cooking porridge,

It was fragrant!

Hua Yue Yu and the others pushed the door open and entered.

Creak!

The hinges of the door emitted a grating sound that set one's teeth on edge.

Not swayed by this scent, Lin Baici could have left, but he hesitated for a moment, stepped over the one-foot-high threshold, and followed them in.

Slam!

The door immediately closed behind Lin Baici as he entered.

Lin Baici turned around and tugged at the wooden door.

It was tight,

and wouldn't open!

This vegetarian hall, named Xiang Ji Kitchen, was quite large, furnished with fifty rectangular tables and wooden stools, seating six to seven hundred diners simultaneously.

On the north side was the kitchen. Though no busy figures were visible, a rich aroma of porridge wafted out.

The old lady found a vacant spot, sat down and began calling out to Lin Baici.

"Bai Ci, come sit!"

Inside Xiang Ji Kitchen, there were many people, Lin Baici glanced around and estimated nearly a hundred, all looking panicked and not in the mood for conversation.

In front of each of them was a large sea bowl filled with purple eight-treasure porridge.

Both the color and fragrance were incredibly tempting, making one long for a taste with just one look.

"Seven servings of fragrant porridge for the guests!"

A hearty female voice rang out across the hall.

To Lin Baici, it felt as though he had entered the den of Sun Erniang from Mount Liang, fearing that any second someone would rush out, hack them to death with random knife strokes, and then turn them into dumpling fillings.

Out of caution, he should've let someone else ask about the current situation, but Kim Myungjin and the others had nothing but 'eating' on their minds and could think of nothing else.

Lin Baici had no choice but to inquire himself.

He first scanned the room, then looked at a sixty-something, white-haired old man sitting diagonally opposite him, three meters away.

"Old man, what's going on here?"

Lin Baici was very polite, but the old man picked up his bowl, slurped a mouthful of porridge and completely ignored him, instead chatting up Hua Yue Yu.

"Beauty, why do you look so familiar to me?"

This old man often watched live streams and loved this sort of young girl.

The less they wore, the better.

[A lecherous old man who disrespects his age, freeloads off live streams, often pretends to be wealthy to hit on female streamers but in fact is a miser. He always sneaks some items when shopping at the supermarket and, when caught, lies on the ground feigning a heart attack!]

[Note, do not help him up if you see him fall, you will be scammed!]

[Recommended to char and feed to dogs!]

The Eater God's triple-slam review thoroughly disparaged the old man.

Hua Yue Yu didn't hear what the old man said at all. She craned her neck, her eyes fixed intently on the kitchen as if she could hardly wait.

Kim Myungjin and the old lady fared no better.

They didn't have to wait long before a cook, carrying a red lacquered tray, came striding out.

On it were seven bowls of porridge.

The bowls were large enough to fit a person's head.

Lin Baici's pupils shrank sharply at the sight of the cook.

She was dressed in a cleanly starched rough linen garment, with an apron around her waist and a white kerchief wrapped around her head.

Her hands were deft, her smile warm and inviting, but she was nearly two meters tall, with a frame like a bear and arms so thick they could run circles around horses.

Lin Baici was certain that facing such a cook, diners wouldn't be pondering how to dine and dash, but whether they would live to leave the place after their meal.

"Seven bowls of 'Happiness, Fortune, Longevity, and Joy' porridge!"

As the cook's voice stretched the last syllables, she set down a bowl of porridge in front of each of the seven, emitting steaming heat and diffusing savory fragrance that was irresistible.

"Enjoy your meal!"

After announcing, the cook placed the tray at her lower abdomen, retreated to the side with a demure smile, and watched the diners.

Kim Myungjin and the others could no longer wait. They discarded the wooden spoons and tipped the large ocean bowls directly to their lips.

Even if it was scalding enough to make them hiss in pain, they didn't stop drinking the porridge.

"..."

Lin Baici's mouth twitched from watching.

The cook was content but noticed Lin Baici hadn't touched his food, and her smile vanished, "You... aren't drinking?"

"It's hot, let it cool!"

Lin Baici offered evasively.

"It tastes better hot!"

The cook explained.

"I'm afraid of getting burnt!"

Lin Baici forced a smile.

"Hehe!"

The old man gloated as he watched Lin Baici, eager to witness his misfortune.

Someone had refused to drink the porridge earlier, only to have the cook forcefully pry their mouth open and pour it into them like swill into a garbage can.

"I'll help you!"

After saying this, the cook slammed the tray onto the table and stood before Lin Baici, rolling up her sleeves as if to help him with his porridge.

Lin Baici dared not let the cook take action, quickly lifted the ocean bowl, "No need, I can do it!"

Gulp!

Lin Baici slurped a mouthful of porridge.

Damn!

It was scalding hot!

The cook's smile returned, she lowered her sleeves, and picked up the tray again.

"Drink up, there's plenty!"

After speaking, the cook headed back to the kitchen.

Lin Baici waited for the cook to turn around, then quickly lowered his head to spit the porridge back into the bowl.

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Who knows if there's something wrong with this thing?

He certainly isn't going to drink it.

Lin Baici was very cautious, his mouth close to the sea bowl, continuously stealing glances at the cook's back. If she noticed him spitting out the porridge, he would immediately take another sip.

Speaking of the cook, was that a kitchen knife hanging from her lower back?

Kind of scary.

The cook did not look back until she entered the kitchen.

Lin Baici felt relieved and looked at the others.

Kim Myungjin and his group of six were drinking porridge, even calling for Lin Baici to hurry up and try it as they ate.

"Stop drinking!"

Lin Baici urged them,

to no avail.

"How can you resist it?"

The old man stared at Lin Baici in shock, dumbfounded.

The other eight people at the table had the same expression.

This porridge was too fragrant. Everyone had been full before they realized something was off, their minds previously consumed with thoughts of drinking porridge.

Lin Baici ignored the old man.

He was hungry, but not for this bowl of porridge. He was thinking about 'eating' something in the kitchen.

The old man's gaze fell onto the pine torch before returning to scrutinize Lin Baici.

This kid,

had such strong willpower. He couldn't hold back just now, drinking porridge like a starving ghost reincarnated. He had overdone it and now felt so full he wanted to vomit.

[Food is the God of the people, drink porridge! Drink porridge!]

Lin Baici, hearing the Eater God's words, felt much more at ease. It seemed the porridge was fine to drink.

In the dining hall, everyone sat on wooden stools with unpleasant expressions as they drank their porridge. Some had obviously been full for a while, but dared not stop, continuing to force it down.

Their bodies were not under their control, attracted here by the fragrance.

"Could it be that if we don't finish the porridge within a certain time frame, we'll be killed?"

Lin Baici analyzed.

"Eh, why aren't you drinking? It's very fragrant!"

Sima Mu was astonished to see Lin Baici not moving. He had already finished his and was even picking up the bowl, licking the remaining grains with his tongue.

"Not hungry!"

Lin Baici noticed that Sima Mu, having filled his stomach with a bowl, was now not so focused on the porridge.

Kim Myungjin didn't have much of an appetite and could eat no more, slowing his porridge drinking considerably. On the other hand, Hua Yue Yu seemed to have an enormous appetite, unexpectedly.

"I advise you to drink up quickly. If the cook comes out later and sees you haven't touched your porridge, she'll chop off your head!"

The old man, irritated that Lin Baici had not touched a single spoonful of porridge, intentionally tried to scare him.

If this Fulu Porridge was harmful to the body and the kid didn't drink it, wouldn't he escape a disaster?

That couldn't happen!

If one was to die, all should die together.

"Don't trouble yourself, I have a weak stomach and can't eat much. I think the cook will understand!"

Lin Baici chuckled.

This old man had some dark thoughts.

As soon as Sima Mu finished his porridge and put down the bowl, belching satisfactorily, the cook brought out another bowl of porridge.

The same large sea bowl was placed on the table in front of Sima Mu.

"Can you tell how many ingredients are in this Shouxipo porridge?"

The cook fluttered her eyes, as big as pool balls, full of anticipation as she stared at Sima Mu.

"Can't tell!"

Sima Mu shook his head. Who could?

He glanced at the hot porridge in the bowl and saw well-cooked red dates, longan, peanuts, and various beans.

Unrecognizable.

The cook seemed disappointed but still mustered a smile, "No problem, drink slowly, take your time to recognize them, no rush!"

Lin Baici raised his eyebrows upon hearing this.

Could it be that to survive, one had to guess the number of ingredients in this Fulu Porridge?

As the cook was about to leave, her gaze swept over the bowl in front of Lin Baici and stopped immediately, her eyes bulged, "Why aren't you drinking?"

As she spoke, the cook reached behind her with her right hand, grabbing the handle of the kitchen knife.

'Heh, let's see if you dare to keep not drinking!'

The old man was pleased.

"I drank some. I'm savoring it!"

Lin Baici explained, "I want to relish the taste of each ingredient on my taste buds!"

Hearing this, the cook's mood lifted, and she excitedly pressed, "Did you taste anything specific?"

"So far, I've discerned five!"

Lin Baici glanced at it and reported several ingredients he recognized.

"Hmm! Hmm!"

The cook nodded eagerly, quite satisfied, "You are the first one among today's diners to seriously taste the Fulu Shouxipo porridge. I'll serve you another hot bowl. Drink up, it's on the house!"

"Thank you!"

Lin Baici was very polite.

The old man and the other diners at nearby tables were dumbfounded.

Drinking porridge in Xiang Ji Kitchen was torture, akin to being punished, but here was someone actually asking for more?

"Ignorance is truly bliss!"

A woman with dyed-red hair sneered.

"He got away with it?"

The old man was speechless.

This student's response had taken him by surprise, especially seeing the cook believe Lin Baici's ruse and not forcing him to drink the scalding hot porridge. It annoyed him greatly.

But when the cook brought another bowl and placed it in front of Lin Baici, advising him to drink quickly, the old man's spirits lifted.

Let's see how you finish this and deal with the aftermath!

Kim Myungjin and the others had drunk most of their porridge bowls. The intense urge to eat had waned, reason returned to their brains, and then sweat poured out in realization of the close call.

Even the dumbest among them began to sense the strangeness.

"Oppa, what should we do?"

Kim Myungjin looked at Lin Baici, her eyes wide with hope.

Their survival depended on him now.

The news anchor, the old lady, and Sister Xiao Li felt the same way. Lin Baici was the village's only hope.