Cycles of Entropy

Day 1

That night had been like every other. Fitful sleep with little rest. When I woke up the following morning, the exhaustion I dragged from city to city woke up with me. I felt no urgency to rise from bed. Every morning for the proceeding years had been a fight with apathy and every morning I had to fight harder. That day was no different. I watched the ceiling from my bed and allowed my thoughts to consume me, unable to work up the motivation to rise and begin my search anew.

It was worse than usual that day, as I actually had a lead to go on. It's funny, how it was easier to push myself into the search when I didn't think I would find anything. But whenever I found any hint of my sister, it was like she was staring at me in my bed, daring me to come and face her. So I lay still, covering my eyes with one arm and convincing myself I couldn't stay there.

'one, two, three, four, five' I counted in my head. I wasn't counting to a specific number, just counting. This was a trick I often used. I gave myself something small to focus on. Something easy to do with simple, definable progress. I could count. Every step had a clear next step. Something to move forward towards. And while I was counting, I wasn't thinking. I poured all of my focus into the simple task and allowed my mind to take one step forward at a time until it would allow me to take the step I needed to get out of bed.

I had woken up before dawn, but the sun was beating on the blinds long before I finally pulled myself out of bed. I had counted somewhere north of thirteen thousand, but it had finally worked. I glanced at the mirror and sniffed. The dark circles under my eyes were as prominent, if not more so than they had been the night before. Then, I glanced at the wash basin. Getting water up here and warming it up seemed... tiresome. What was one more day without a bath, anyway?

Instead of that, I simply retrieved a worn ribbon I had left on the bed. I didn't remember taking it out but I must have at some point in the night. I used it to tie my frazzled hair up in a loose top knot, then proceeded down the stairs. There were a couple of new faces in the common area, but most of the patrons were the same as the night before. Many were already drinking and Livia was happily chatting with a man I hadn't met yet. Marcus was missing, but nearly everyone was in the same seats I had left them in.

"Rise and shine Mars," Livia called to me, a friendly smirk on her face, "You're up later than I thought you would be." I gave her a tired look but didn't bother explaining.

"Did you say the barracks was in the center of town?" I asked instead, to be met with a not-quite chuckle expressed as a sharp breath out of her nose.

"Not interested in small talk today, huh?" she joked and I immediately felt guilty for dismissing her efforts.

"S-sorry. I didn't sleep so well," I explained, eliciting a full laugh.

"I can see that. Well, it's no bother. Yeah, that's where the barracks are, but you won't find Octavia there this morning. Not if Claude here is to be believed," she informed me. I raised an eyebrow, inviting her to explain, and the man she was talking to, Claude, offered his insights.

"I'm afraid she'll be busy at the city gates. You chose a poor time to visit I'm afraid. Word is the Mayor had the gate closed. No one is being let in or out, and a fair bit of people want out," he explained.

"Man's a bit jumpy, always has been," Livia added, shaking her head as she leaned against the bar. "Scared by all this silly talk of magic plagues that strike once an hour. I'm not sure what the point of quarantine is after so many people have already fled, but no one ever accused old Cassius of thinking things through."

Claude shrugged in response, "If you ask me, he just doesn't want any more taxpayers leaving. This panic gets big enough and he'll be as poor as the rest of us before long!" He laughed and Livia joined him.

"In any case, looks like you're stuck with us for a while," Livia apologized.

"It's all the same," I intoned before walking toward the door. And it was. So I would have to stay in Beddenmor a while longer. It really didn't matter. If anything, it was a good excuse not to go on the road for a bit. I often looked for reasons to delay, and it was actually a relief to have one presented.

"Not gonna have breakfast first?" Livia asked and I just shook my head. I wouldn't mind a reason to wait a bit longer before investigating, but the smell of the eggs made my stomach churn. Aside from that, I had to ride the momentum from coming downstairs. If I took one excuse, I would take another, and another. I wasn't really hungry anyway. I usually wasn't. It was one reason I had become so thin in the last year. It wasn't healthy, but I didn't need to be.

"Thanks, but I'll be back for dinner," I answered. Then, finally, I walked out into the road. The city was much as it had been the day before, if more active. I walked past the market and noted it was as lively as any. A group of six young girls chased each other in a game of tag, weaving through the shoppers and occasionally stealing sweets from the baker. A woman would apologize and pay him for the goods, which he would refuse with a jovial laugh.

It was only if I paid attention that I saw the signs that something was wrong. It was like movement in the corner of your eye, or focusing enough to realize you could see the tip of your nose. When I did that, I could see the worry on people's faces. The grief hiding behind smiling eyes. The lost looks of lonely wanderers, walking past the stalls but never looking at them. It was a look I knew well.

It wasn't long before I had retraced my steps from the day before and arrived at the gate. As I had been told, it was closed. This was a smaller city, but it was still a city, surrounded by stone walls. With that gate shut, no one was going to leave. Quite a few families were crowded around the gate making their complaints clear. Claude and Livia had been right, the guards had their hands full. I scanned the angry crowd, mostly composed of families with large packs and wagons loaded with luggage.

There were a dozen guards fielding complaints and preventing anyone from making a push for the exit. As I scanned, I spotted what I was looking for. A woman with long, raven black hair, a severe face, and far more ornate armor was sitting at a makeshift desk and giving directions to a few more guards. I had found Octavia. I approached, rehearsing my question in my head when a panicked man beat me to her.

She groaned as she saw him and spoke before he ever had a chance to ask his question. "I told you yesterday, I can't help you! There is no plague. There is no curse. Neither took your daughter. She is probably just hiding at a friend's home. You need to check with them!" she insisted. I supposed that supported Claude's theory about the gate being closed to prevent people from moving rather than to contain a sickness. It was also possible the captain and the mayor weren't on the same page. At the time, it didn't really matter to me, so I just listened while waiting for my own turn.

"I don't care about the rumors, I told you! But she is gone! She never stays out late and none of her friends know where she is! Please, I just want someone to look for her! Something isn't right!" he begged.

"I don't know if you noticed, but my guards are a bit busy at the moment. I have spared everyone I can to look for your kid, alright? If your daughter hasn't shown up in a couple of days, I'll start a more thorough investigation. For now, I can at least promise you she hasn't left the city. Now if you'll excuse me, I have work to do," she dismissed but the man didn't leave.

"You have two guards looking for her, and I never once saw them asking anyone about her! I need real help!" he insisted and Octavia sighed before pulling out a paper and quill to write something down.

"Here, go to this address. The woman there might be able to help you. Now, if you don't mind, I seriously have work to do!" She instructed before waving him off. He reluctantly grabbed the paper and looked at it. He stood there for a moment, and just when he was going to speak again, she held up a hand. "I've given you what I can. Now go away before I have you taken away," she ordered and the man slumped. He finally shambled away from the crowd, looking down at the paper and reading it to himself.

After a moment, I approached myself and spoke, "Excuse, me," I began and she rubbed her temples in frustration.

"There is no plague. There is no curse. I don't know what happened to your friend, lover, parents, or kid. The gates will open in a few days when all this blows over. Does that cover it?" she asked and I just stood there for a moment, taken aback.

"U-um, sorry," I said, "I just wanted to ask about the garden, in the south part of the city?" I said and she looked up at me, hostility screaming from her glare.

"What about it?" she demanded, and I had to ignore my increasing heart rate.

"I-I just, I'm sorry. It's just my sister was a flora mage and... well, in any case, I heard it was blocked off. I was just... well I wanted to get permission to take a look at it?" I spluttered and her eyes narrowed in suspicion and frustration.

"Luna's Gift, woman, can't you see I am busy? You are bothering me because of some garden? If you want to smell some fucking roses go to a flower stall! Is this really a priority? Go away." She ordered. I wanted to argue but... I didn't have it in me. I didn't know why the garden was blocked off, but it was obvious I wasn't going to get permission by debating with her. So I fell back on plan B.

I left the gate and headed south. It took some time, but eventually, and with directions from strangers, I made it to the entrance to the garden. Supposedly, it was an enclosed area, walled off from the rest of the city. As I had been told, several guards were posted at the entrance and no one was being let through. I figured I could look into it later since it had apparently been there for years anyway.

Instead, I was here to speak to Hadley. A few more questions helped me find his home. A humble little cottage outside the more condensed residential district but closer to the garden he managed. It had vines growing over the walls and a smaller garden bed out front. I walked to the door and went to knock when I realized it was slightly ajar. I paused for a moment, before deciding to knock anyway.

There was no answer and, after a moment, I knocked again. I felt a familiar anxiety in my stomach when I was met with more silence. An open door and no answer was never a good sign. Cautiously, I pushed the door open... and froze.

Standing inside, holding a watering can over a drowned flowerpot, was Hadley. He was pale. Paler than pale. His hair, his eyes, and his skin were all a matching, dull, gray. Hadley was dead.