Crazy Britain:They’re All Raising Me

[Skill: Elden Lord · EX]

[The falling leaves bring tidings,]

[After crossing countless battlefields, enduring myriad trials, felling demigods, and severing the incarnation of the Greater Will,]

[The Tarnished has become a Lord.]

[And power, is the reason to be Lord.]

[All skills in the world of Elden Ring are now available to you. You may call upon any Noble Phantasm or magical equipment from Elden Ring at will, and all effects are treated as fully enhanced.]

[While possessing the skill "Elden Lord," you also gain "All Weapon Proficiency · A."]

[While possessing the skill "Elden Lord," you gain "Riding · A" and the magical item Spectral Steed Whistle.]

[While possessing the skill "Elden Lord," you gain the magical items Crimson Flask of Tears and Cerulean Flask of Tears.]

[While possessing the skill "Elden Lord," if you are a Servant, you gain compatibility with all classes and candidacy for all Grand classes.]

[Your lowest stat is locked at A+.]

[You gain massive bonus damage against dragons, kings, gods, extraterrestrials, and Servants from the Heaven, Earth, and Humanity alignments. If a target has multiple attributes, bonuses stack multiplicatively.]

[Your quickstep and roll actions automatically grant the "Evade" property.]

[Because the Shadow Servant Yulther you've fused with has no consciousness, your mind remains unaffected.]

[However, since the Shadow Servant Yulther is not living and accounts for over 80% of your power after fusion, you are now considered undead. If separation is not achieved, your remaining lifespan is reduced to one day.]

It was hard to describe just how shocked Guinevere was upon seeing this skill.

There was a twisted beauty to the sheer absurdity of it—as if some developer had smashed the stats and mechanics together with their foot. But even the term "overpowered" fell short of capturing its true brokenness.

All stats locked at A+, mastery of all weapons, ridiculous evasion, and access to the full arsenal of Elden Ring... Guinevere had once thought Yulther's build resembled that of a spellblade, but now realized how wrong he had been. Just because Yulther used spellblade moves didn't mean he was limited to them.

In truth, this guy was a full-clear, 100% completion bucket build.

Then there were the massive attack bonuses against literally every type of enemy. Some poor souls would be hit by multiple stacked multipliers at once. No wonder when Guinevere previously fought Shadow Yulther, any hit the latter landed was an instant kill. Even Grimm, with Odin's blessing, was one-shot—after all, he took 16x damage from four stacked bonuses. Instant death was only natural.

No wonder Grimm once hailed Yulther as the strongest human in the history of Fairy Britain... Honestly, even counting all the fairies in that history, none could match a monster like this.

Clearly, even among EX-ranked skills, some were far more broken than others.

As for the side effect—lifespan reduced to one day post-fusion... that didn't matter to Guinevere anymore.

He had only half a day to live anyway—no, maybe just a few hours, given how much time had passed in the battle.

As they say, when you're already buried in debt, what's one more?

He casually plunged his greatsword into the ground and began recalling powerful weapons and spells from Elden Ring, choosing his gear.

Looking up at the dragon still soaring through the skies, Guinevere quickly chose his first weapon.

—It was a spear shaped like lightning, composed of two twisted metal rods coiled into a jagged form:

[Noble Phantasm: Ancient Lightning Spear of Gransax]

[Rank: A]

[Type: Anti-Unit]

[This weapon hails from a distant universe. It is said to be the jagged spear broken off from Gransax, one of the ancient dragons whose roar once shook the world. Considered one of the legendary weapons.]

[This spear embodies the power of Gransax, the most colossal of all ancient dragons. Imbued with crimson lightning, its Noble Phantasm unleashes a thunderous javelin strike that annihilates foes across great distances.]

[When Gransax attacked, Leyndell's walls were breached—the only time in history this occurred—sparking the war against the ancient dragons.]

Since Lancelot had often struck him with the Lightning Blade of Lanssax, it was time to repay the favor with Gransax's lightning.

Raising the legendary weapon high, a thunderclap sounded, and crimson lightning gathered in his hand. The lightning spear was several meters long, casting a divine glow upon Guinevere.

Though smaller than the ten-meter-long Lightning Blade of Lanssax, the Gransax spear was never about size.

He stepped forward, twisted his hips, and hurled the lightning spear skyward.

A flash tore through the clouds, followed by a distant shriek from Albion.

Even though Albion was still flying miles above the clouds at supersonic speed, it couldn't dodge Guinevere's strike.

After all, Gransax's spear was renowned for its incredible range and speed—nicknamed the "Dragon Sniper." For someone like Guinevere, it was perfect for hitting fast-moving aerial targets like Lancelot.

But Albion retaliated almost immediately—a torrent of energy rained down like satellite laser fire, carving across the earth toward Guinevere.

In response, he quickly summoned a new piece of equipment, planting it before him.

—A massive golden shield, large enough to cover him entirely, adorned with withered branches and mysterious magical runes.

As Guinevere raised it, a golden magic circle formed in front of the shield, intercepting the energy blast. The destructive beam vanished into the golden seal without harming Guinevere.

Then the circle glowed brighter, channeling the absorbed energy into a blinding golden arrow, which it fired back at Albion.

[Noble Phantasm: Greatshield of the Erdtree]

[Rank: B]

[Type: Anti-Unit]

[This heavy shield, crafted of gold, hails from a distant world and is wielded by heavily armored knights known as Tree Sentinels. It holds an ancient prayer of protection.]

[The ultimate symbol of all Erdtree guardians, it stands like a wall.]

[Upon release, it activates its protective enchantment, nullifying magic attacks and reflecting them with golden power.]

The golden arrow pierced the clouds, racing toward Albion. Though slower than the lightning spear, it was fast enough—yet Albion accelerated and dodged with ease.

"Ranged attack failed."

"Hostile unit identified. Evasive action successful."

"Analyzing enemy behavior..."

"Conclusion: Ranged attacks ineffective."

"Switching to melee mode."

"Close-combat weapons: Locked."

"Core output: Increased."

"Advancing: Full speed."

Though now devoid of human intelligence, Albion—the Endgame Construct of Britain—was a pure killing machine. Its battle analysis matched or even exceeded Lancelot's.

In the next moment, its magically enhanced dragon core erupted, propelling Albion toward Guinevere at breakneck speed.

Another crimson spear shot up from below—Guinevere had fired a second Gransax.

"Detected hostile projectile."

"Analyzing pattern... complete."

"Calculating trajectory... evasion initiated."

Albion suddenly halted, fired its thrusters, and juked sideways with impossible agility, dodging the spear completely. Then it accelerated again.

"Only needed one try to analyze my pattern, huh? Impressive."

Guinevere smirked, tossed aside his shield and spear, and summoned a new staff and talisman.

"Let's try these—"

But before he could cast a spell, his eyes widened.

Albion was already in front of him.

A moment ago, they'd been miles apart. But right after Guinevere threw the spear, Albion closed the gap at inhuman speed.

There was a flash.

The ground split. Fire erupted. The bell tower exploded into rubble.

"If you're not some HP-stacked blood god, that's a one-hit kill."

Stopping just outside the blast zone, Guinevere glanced back at the leveled building and muttered.

If not for his use of "Bloodhound Step," he'd be dead.

[Skill: Bloodhound Step]

[Rank: B]

[This combat art from a distant world was mastered by knights loyal to demigods. It lets the user vanish and reappear far ahead, phasing out of space and avoiding attacks with unmatched speed and distance.]

As Albion charged, Guinevere had chain-used Bloodhound Step to escape its attack radius without a scratch.

No wonder Lancelot spammed Seya Slash—dodging everything with invincibility frames was genuinely fun.

But when Albion curved back around and charged again, Guinevere didn't dodge.

"I don't make a habit of taking hits."

"You're a dragon? Then let's see who's more dragon."

He reached into the clouds, summoned a massive stone thrusting sword, stepped forward, and vanished into crimson thunderclouds.

"Dragon Slayer's Cragblade: Lightning Avatar!"