Control Comes from Within

As I laid my head onto the soft and downy pillow, my stomach full from a hearty dinner, and a breathable silk robe wrapped around me, I thought about the tumultuous first day I had.

The different magics I had seen, the welcome revelation that not all the noble students were pompous jackasses, the fact that non-humans were working as professors, my provisionally-labelled ‘friends’, the matter of my soul and what that meant for me going forward, and…the one thing I had delayed thinking about all day.

Or rather, the one word.

Osenir.

Even saying the word in my head brought forth memories of that first battle, where I decided that I didn’t want to die again, a feeling that had ebbed and flowed as time progressed.

“Kid, I’m cutting you slack cause you’re an idiot, but next time, don’t ask someone what it means. Ever.” The fatigued baritone voice of Elius resounded in my head as I thought back to the aftermath of that battle.

The guards were burning the bodies of the slain monsters by throwing them all into a small mound and igniting it, but I was staring into the lone wooden pyre that had a single body laid atop it. In my effort to hold back tears through distraction, I asked him about the chant that he and his men started shouting right before the battle.

“It’s the name of the second human king. Osenir was considered a champion of the common people, where his father, the first king, was a tyrant, killing anyone who crossed him, or anyone he thought crossed him. He was a ruthless and cruel man, whose only redeeming quality, at least according to the legends, was that he united the wandering nomads and established the framework for the kingdom.”

“It happened ages ago, so nobody knows the details, but the king eventually became such a bad ruler that his son deposed him, and was forced to kill him. The people were grateful that he was gone, but the man’s death invited another kind of misery. These damned savages,” he spat towards the other pyres, “It was one of the first times they attacked en masse. The new king had barely held a blade before, and these vermin were endless, but he rallied his people to defend, and sure enough, they won. The stories say he was blessed by the Mother herself, as he cut down waves of enemies with every swing of his sword. Who knows how it started, but supposedly, someone important was about to die, and they cried out his name in desperation, and despite the fact that the king was no mage, he’d miraculously appear in front of them, just before saving them from a terrible death.”

“Every single time, when they cried out his name, he’d save them, somehow. The casualties were high, and the bodies were piled tall enough to make mountains, but they managed to survive. And it was all thanks to Osenir.”

The man stood next to me, as we both stared into the flames.

“...How did he do it?” I asked quietly. At that time, I didn’t give a shit how he did it, I just wanted a distraction from my own thoughts, none of which were productive or helpful.

“Who knows? Some say the Mother couldn’t bear to see him die, some claim he burned his soul for power, some even doubt it was him at all. But it doesn’t matter. Osenir, however great he was, died long ago. We can only save ourselves when it comes down to it.”

“But…we say his name to remind ourselves…that there is a seed of greatness inside each of us. That hope is a powerful weapon if you can wield it properly. To never give up, despite how dark things may seem or how easy it would be to do so. That if you are going to die, die well, knowing your actions made a difference. And…to beseech the Mother to take pity on us, as she did to her favored son.”

“...It’s only meant to be said before a battle or during one, out of respect and honor for the first man who was called a hero. It’s a bit of an open secret, but for the most part, only soldiers and knights will know the name, which is how you can tell when someone’s been through the same shit you have.”

The flames were blazing and crackling, steadily burning through the bodies in their midst, as the guards began to wearily march alongside the carts, the terrified merchants sitting within too frightened to comment on the loss of their goods in the attack.

I closed my eyes as I mentally returned to the present. A gentle nudging sensation from within me drew my attention, as I fed essence through my one real tamer link to the green deer.

Deerie is…just bad. Verdant…verdis…verdix? No, I’d crack up every time I called him out.

Naming my second companion was a long overdue task, and one I was happy to cross off my mental list of things to do. That it distracted me from overanalyzing the more serious events going on was just a happy coincidence.

Greenie, no. Doe, a deer, wait, that’s literally a female deer, idiot. Alright, what else, what else…forest, deer, healing, beast, what else comes to mind when I think of it –

“Mint.”

…What.

That last thought was not mine, which was creepy enough on its own, but considering the object of my thoughts…I reached out to the primary suspect.

“Can you hear me?”

“I’ve always been able to hear you, dolt,” the other voice in my head responded,

Great. Attitude from my beast companion. Exactly what I needed right now.

“That is what you call sarcasm, yes?”

…Are you kidding me?!

“No, I’m not ‘kidding you’ as you seem to be fond of saying.”

“Seriously! You can just read my mind now! What the actual hell!” I exclaimed aloud, to which thankfully, the deer didn’t respond.

“I believe this is a consequence of your growing abilities rather than any action undertaken on my part,” he nonchalantly thought to me a few seconds later.

Okay, first things first. Do you already have a name? I thought, trying to ignore the total absurdity and weirdness of the situation, and focus on the trivial details.

“No, I have no name. But the name Mint seems to fit me.” the deer smugly thought.

…Do you even know what mint is?

“Yes. You once thought that your friend could use a mint, and when I connected to your thoughts on that word, the feelings I was able to perceive were a mixture of an unnatural white leaf that you use after eating, a cooling tingle, and some profound human ritual where you insert the feathery stick inside your mouth and –”

Okay, okay, and for your information, it’s called brushing. God, I miss brushing. My old dentist would cry tears of joy if he could see my teeth now.

“...So, my name is Mint now, yes?” he confidently replied, ignoring my rambling thoughts.

Mint, mint. It’s not a terrible name, but it’s lacking a little something…

Peppermint, spearmint –

“Spear! You said spear mint? As in a combination of a weapon and herb? Fascinating! I elect spearmint as my new name!”

“Aren’t I supposed to be the one choosing your name?” I grumbled to myself.

Alright, fine, you win. As your tamer –

“Contractor.” For the first time, his voice had a weight to it that would not be ignored. ”You did not tame me, young one. You subdued me in a moment of upheaval and, however gently, forced me into your service.” the deer rebuked me.

…Look, I’m sorry, ok? That wolf thing was trying to kill me, and I didn’t know if you were dangerous either, and I was just trying it out.

“It is in the past, young one, and no matter how much you might wish otherwise, nothing can change that now.” In hindsight, it was obvious that whatever bond we had, it didn’t start out on a positive note, and I made a mental note to myself to start rectifying that.

…Then, as your contractor, I hereby name you Spearmint, First Beast Companion to the idiot named Rhaaj Achaarya.

And as I mentally spoke those words, I felt a slight buildup of pressure within my lower abdomen…before I quickly released it, a tiny high-pitched pfft sounding out.

Do you feel any different now that you have a name?

“Only relief in that you will no longer refer to me as the deer or the green deer. It was agonizing having to listen to you refer to me as such so many times.”

Well, I’m happy for you.

“I can clearly feel that you’re not.”

…Goodnight, Spearmint, I thought, wanting to quickly put an end to this conversation.

“May your rest be peaceful, contractor.” his smug voice responded, his intonation indicating to me that he was clearly aware of what I was doing.

With that, I narrowed the link between us until it returned to its passive state, just enough for the deer – Spearmint – to feed off my essence.

I was tired even before that mental conversation, and doubly so afterwards. I could have attempted communication with the other residents of my beast space, but…I really didn’t want to. They were literal monsters. Who knew how those talks would go, or if they were even capable of rational thought?

That was a problem for future-me. Let that guy deal with it once he had more energy and was in a better headspace.

I held my forearm above my closed eyes in an attempt to sleep. Before I drifted off, I was simply glad that not all my thoughts were audible to Spearmint.

That would get awkward and embarrassing quickly.

The next morning pulled me out of my sleep just in time to see the sunrise, barely peeking over the horizon, as a small visible orange semicircle half hidden beneath the clouds slowly made itself known.

Out of sheer habit, I started stretching and got ready to go to the Workman’s Society, nearly halfway through my morning hygiene routine, before my mind started functioning properly and I recalled a relevant fact.

My scholarship means I no longer need to scramble for pennies, dammit, I mean squares, anymore.

It didn’t mean I would stop doing tasks, just that I would need to do less to cover the cost of my tuition. Oh, and I couldn’t forget about my rainy day fund, the money I jokingly referred to that was safely tucked away in my beast space. At last count, it was something like…thirty-eight circles? Maybe thirty-nine? I’d have to keep better track of my budgeting going forward, but even if I was kicked out of the academy right now, I’d still be able to live a comfortable life.

Well, for however long it takes for my soul problems to regress, at least.

The somber thought was quickly swept away as I looked forward to breakfast. I wasn’t hungry, but food provided nearly as much of a distraction as work at times.

Once I was ready for what was sure to be a riveting second day of classes, I exited my room, and faced the door marked ‘Tunnel’ that stood a few feet away from me. I had meant to ask Su’jiif about it, but somehow the timing never quite worked out.

No sooner had the thought occurred to me than…

“Ah, well met, young Rhaaj.” The door in front of my room opened, revealing a disheveled Su’jiif who was wearing the same clothes as yesterday. His hair stuck out in different directions, and his eyes were bloodshot.

“Are you sick? No offense, but you seem…out of sorts.” I asked.

Yawning, he replied with, “I’ve been busy with my research. The, yawn, the similarities between lightning and fire are fascinating once you, yawn, once you discover the bonds between…” And just like that, he drifted off in the middle of his sentences, still standing up, if slightly swaying a little.

Poking him lightly, I asked, “Hey, Su’jiif?”

“Yes! Yes, I’m awake. Forgive me, I’m just…why did I come out again?” he asked himself, looking around the mostly empty hallway.

“I think you should take a break. Maybe a nap before you get back to your research?” I proposed to him.

“That, perhaps…” Trailing off, he closed his door again, leaving me alone once more.

I’m glad I’m not sticking around for the fourth year if that’s what I have to look forward to.

I shook my head, ignoring the interaction I just had as I turned to the door marked ‘Tunnel’, and had to slide it sideways, as there was no knob or handle. The door opened to reveal a long and empty vertical shaft with a strong wind blowing down from the ceiling. As I peeked downwards, I saw the glass floor and a formation etched around it.

As I knew from my intro to magic class, formations were basically a single spell that took effect over a large area via permanent means, such as etching or carving the necessary runes into the surroundings, and were usually powered by essence stones, but could be powered by people if it was required. The terms formation and array were used interchangeably, despite the obvious misunderstandings that were possible when using the term ‘formation’ in the military.

I didn’t see the purpose of the Tunnel, so I decided to try it out. It had to have some purpose, and I was curious what it was. Worse case scenario, the glass would break my fall.

I peered over the edge again, and before I could develop any second thoughts, I got a running start and leapt into the vast emptiness spread-eagled with my limbs outstretched, before the wind pushed at my back and gravity dragged me further downwards. The first three seconds were terrifying, but in the blink of an eye, before I could even think to brace for the impact, a rush of wind blew into me, slowing my descent considerably and letting me reorient myself to land standing up on the glass floor, which was somehow extremely soft. I tested it incredulously by pushing my foot down as hard as I could, but the floor sank in a few inches before slowly rising back to its current position.

It took a minute to regain my bearings, but soon enough I noticed the only door there and walked through it, pulling it aside. I had emerged on the ground floor, as the rooms I could see all had a nameplate that started with zero.

If the Tunnel took me down, does that mean…

To confirm my suspicion, I walked all the way to the other end of the hallway, where an identical door marked ‘Tunnel’ stood. Opening it revealed a familiar scene, as an empty glass floor with carvings on it greeted me. Looking up, the sight of a long vertical shaft met my eyes.

If this pushes me up, where would I land once I reach the top?

As it turned out, the academy had considered that problem already. No sooner had I stepped onto the glass floor, when the formation activated and a gust of wind blew me up, just as quickly as I had previously come down, Once I approached what I thought would be the fourth floor, a blast of wind pushed into me and flung me sideways, almost throwing me right into the closed door.

As I caught my breath, I took a moment to reflect on the round trip I unexpectedly sent myself on. I’d prefer taking the stairs over this magical half-functioning pseudo-elevator any day. Unfortunately, I couldn’t just jump back down and reach the ground floor as the wind would just push me back up. I gathered myself, again, as I steadily headed to the other end of the hallway, where my ride down awaited me.

One more time wouldn’t be the end of the world.