Conscious, Conscientious

An explosion rattled everything before Kotono’s eyes.

Wei hadn’t seen it coming in the slightest: not until it was far too late. Kotono’s unrestrained red energy barreled straight into him and he vanished underneath a plume of smoke and decimated stone. She watched, hovering in the air, as the entire front gate of the capital began to collapse.

Kotono moved her hands out of her line of vision—she loathed the thought of their association with the unfolding destruction.

But there was no fooling herself. This devastation came from her. These were her powers.

And right now, she had no choice—not if she wanted to save Zayza and the others.

Everyone was counting on her.

Kotono thought she might get sick. The energy overflowed from her body endlessly, painting everything in a red light.

We’ll make sure they’re okay…we’ll save them…we’ll make sure they don’t have to hurt anymore…

Streaks of gold mixed in as she recited these reminders in her head over and over.

But the breathlessness and nausea wouldn’t fade. Neither would her energy.

It was about to release, and she had no hope of containing it.

Lifting her hands again, Kotono aimed back towards the ground where Wei had likely fallen, underneath piles of still-settling rubble.

If I have to let it out, she thought, I might as well use it for something!

Channeling all of the surging power around her body, Kotono fired another deafening beam of red light. It exploded against the ground, now mixing dirt into the flying debris.

If the first blast hadn’t defeated Wei, perhaps this one accomplished it. Perhaps her overwhelming energy was enough, and her friends no longer had to worry about him.

The thought slowed Kotono’s sore heart just a little.

Immediately after the attack, she felt herself begin to descend. With all the built-up energy released, there wasn’t enough to keep her body elevated. It meant for a worse view for investigating the aftermath, but it calmed her breath even further.

After years of associating levitation with panic attacks, descent had become a comfort. She’d be okay.

Kotono steered back to the outside of the former gate, where the illusions of her teammates stood moments ago. Delicately, her feet met the dark Azvaylen grass. Her eyes stung a bit from the now hazy air.

“Sorry Zayza’s home…” she muttered feebly.

Perhaps when all of this was over, she could convince her finance team to donate towards the repairs. If Hiroko gave the pitch, it could be convincing.

No…they can’t ever find out about this, she knew. EVER.

Running away from their security, skipping paid events…she and Hiroko had already done that endless times as it was. Management was already livid.

But trespassing into a restricted reality? Secretly combating an unknown evil organization? Launching a city-wide offensive to revolt and overthrow a corrupted government??

On second thought, Kotono wasn’t so sure ‘It was to save our friends’ would satisfy them.

She and Hiroko were in it deep, now.

But there was no turning back. Nothing had ever mattered more in Kotono’s life.

They need us, Kotono thought. She’d never apologize for this—no matter what was about to happen.

At the very least, she was grateful Wei had dismissed the two guards under the gate before she struck. Without realizing it, he’d spared them from her harm.

Kotono looked down at her shaking hands again. Her parents’ voices began echoing in her head.

“You nailed it,” came a sandy voice instead, casting them away.

Kotono lifted her eyes to her love, who came jogging from beside the capital’s wall. She sighed—at a time like this, she couldn’t take another moment without Hiroko. Kotono watched as she steered clear of the smoking mounds and slowed to a walk.

“That guy had it coming,” Hiroko excused.

Kotono’s contemplation of regret must have snuck onto her face. The glow from her energy hadn’t reemerged, but Hiroko didn’t need that to decode her feelings. She hadn’t for years, now.

“T—true…”

Hiroko’s firm arm wrapped around her. It was always so warm. Kotono finally remembered to breathe.

“Feel okay?”

“Not ex—exactly…”

“Hm. Phoenix Float?”

Kotono’s eyes lit up. “Seriously?! You have one?!”

“What?! No!” Hiroko laughed. “I didn’t think you’d fall for that!”

Pouting, Kotono reached up and pinched Hiroko’s nose.

A rustling in the pile of debris reclaimed their attention. Startled, they turned to find a section of broken bricks had shifted and tumbled loosely. The duo waited, but nothing else stirred.

“Y—you think that was enough?” Kotono asked, her stare still on the rubble. “You think he’s…well, defeated?”

Hiroko tightened her embrace, her icy eyes narrowing. That was never the expression Kotono wanted to see.

“So he’s really that powerful?” she asked.

“I was hoping not,” Hiroko said. “But…I can feel something. He’s in there.”

Kotono observed Hiroko’s bare, tattooed feet in the grass. While she felt no rumblings under her own feet, Hiroko’s drew from generations of knowledge. After all, her people had been navigating and hunting in the Mainland Desert for longer than recorded history.

“Vibrations?” Kotono guessed.

Hiroko nodded. “More intense than a burrowing Sand Dragon.”

Even without knowing the comparison, Kotono shuddered. Her hope proved to be nothing more than wishful optimism.

“You did exactly what we asked of you, Kotono,” Hiroko assured, her watch still wary. “Now we wait, and stay ready.”

Kotono nodded unevenly. So far, everything had gone to plan.

But they still had a job to do.

We don’t have to beat him—not yet, Kotono reminded herself. Just contain him for as long as we can; hold him back to let Skrili, Deon, and Phillip take out the other members…

Then we can all fight him as a unit.

Hiroko guided Kotono backwards steadily, yet swiftly. She waited to stop until they were several paces from the site of the blasts.

“What’s wrong…?” Kotono dared to inquire.

“The energy is increasing.”

Finally, Kotono sensed it too.

The ground shook steadily. A low rumble resonated all around, so deep Kotono could feel it in her bones more than hear it. More fragments from the wreckage of the gate came loose and tumbled to the ground as if in attempt to escape.

“Breathe,” Hiroko reminded Kotono, her composure in direct contrast to the unfolding terror.

It didn’t matter. Kotono couldn’t. Her mind spun, unable to grasp onto any form of preparation.

He was rising.

It was up to her again—but she couldn’t move.

Jagged red heat ignited around her. Hiroko had removed her arm just in time, but she remained by her side—despite the likely unbearable heat.

“It’s alright. Just pour all that energy towards keeping him contained,” Hiroko advised.

But it wasn’t alright. This wasn’t a normal fight.

He was going to really hurt them.

Or worse.

Flashes of lightning flickered from her body. Her feet lifted gradually off the ground.

Levitation. Panic.

Kotono gasped for air, but lost it just as swiftly.

“Hiroko…” she pleaded. “I’m…”

“It’s okay. Just aim and let it go,” said Hiroko, as if she were merely giving instructions on how to build a chair. “Just aim…”

Her voice sounded a little uneven that time.

Wei wasn’t the most immediate danger to them anymore. Now Kotono realized it was herself.

If she couldn’t get this under control, Hiroko would be first in the path of destruction.

Kotono gasped even harder, again and again. The realization only tightened the pressure in her chest. It only fueled her raging storm.

But by now, everything was too hazy for her to see. The world was red. The wind gusting from her started sucking away what little breath she managed.

“I…I can’t…Hir…I…” she barely exhaled.

“Just aim, it’s alright!” insisted Hiroko over the wind. “Just aim so you don’t…Kotono! Hey! Just aim! YOU HAVE TO AIM, OKAY?!”

Kotono forced her hands to raise and point forward—or at least, that was her intent: she couldn’t feel a thing, just a cold tingle in her fingertips.

Panic. Danger. Panic. Fault. Panic. Destruction.

Everything is ending.

Kotono screamed, but it made no sound.

“There you go! You’re doing so great! Now release it!”

Where am I?

“Great, Kotono!”

Where am I? What am I doing?

“Hey…how about you leave the rest to me? If you want to stop, it’s okay.”

Warm…

Why is Hiroko’s voice so close to me again?

~~~

“Hey Kotono! Good morning. How’d you sleep?”

There she was—early as always, and already so awake. Hiroko marched over to the luxurious seat across from Kotono and joined her in the waiting area by the conference room.

It was always too cold in here, and too bright. The nearly aerial view of the city was admittedly nice, but she’d already observed it many times over waiting for countless other meetings like today’s, and waiting on nearly countless past teammates.

Hiroko was the only one to have lasted this many meetings. Kotono still couldn’t fathom why, but she didn’t question it, either. Hiroko was different than the others. There was something magnetic about her from day one.

But…why was she sitting so far away? Why so formal?

And…Kotono hadn’t seen her wear her Hidakalan robe and scarf in ages—she didn’t even realize Hiroko still had one. Having stolen practically all of her t-shirts for pajamas by now, Kotono was certain she had Hiroko’s miniscule wardrobe memorized.

Come to think of it, somehow, Hiroko’s hair was a little longer now, too…

Oh…I’m in the past, Kotono finally understood.

The waiting area…the too-familiar skyline…early morning drowsiness…formal Hiroko in religious garbs…combining all the clues, Kotono knew precisely how far back she was.

This was the agency meeting after their very first championship win, when they’d only been a team for about two months. That explained why Kotono felt so relieved right now—they’d just come off of a week of scheduled rest and time with family, and they hadn’t seen each other for days.

Before, Kotono would have never thought she’d be dying for the time away from fighting to be over. But it wasn’t the fighting; coming back to business meant she got to be around Hiroko again.

Wait…it was this meeting, wasn’t it?

The receptionist got up and stepped away to retrieve her coffee.

Kotono remembered: she had something to tell Hiroko.

“H—hey…” she stammered. “Um…I…Hiroko, there’s something you really should know…”

“Hm? About what?”

“A—about…me…” said Kotono. She spun her head around to ensure they were still alone before leaning closer. “I’ve never admitted it to anyone…b—but…with everything going so well between us…I feel like I can tell you.”

A last-second reluctance set in. But then, Hiroko’s smile empowered her.

Fiddling with her skirt, Kotono pressed her eyes shut. “U—um…I…I seriously hate consciousness fighting!”

Before she even finished reopening her eyes, Hiroko’s easy reply already came out.

“Oh. You should quit, then,” she suggested plainly.

Kotono was beside herself. “Huh? But…NO!”

“I mean, if you hate it…” Hiroko tried to explain.

“I c—can’t just quit!”

“Sure you can. I really love being a team, but I feel like we’re friends now, too. And I’d rather my friend be happy,” insisted Hiroko. “I’ll make you a guest to all of my tournaments if you want, and we can keep in touch. So if you want to stop, it’s okay.”

Kotono shook her head, but she didn’t know what to say. Maybe Hiroko didn’t get it.

“I want to keep doing this,” she managed.

“Are you sure?”

“Y—yes.”

“Can I ask you why?”

Kotono couldn’t remember the answer she gave in that original moment. It most likely involved the idea of finishing what she started, or not wanting to let her family down.

But even back then, she knew neither of those were true.

Now, immersed in this moment from years ago, she could revise her response. She could be honest with the person who would prove her right in becoming the most important part of her life.

Kotono knew why she refused to quit consciousness fighting.

“Because I wouldn’t get to spend my life with you anymore.”

~~~

“What are you talking about?” Hiroko laughed patiently.

Kotono blinked. She found herself sitting in the grass where she had just been floating. She could feel everything again, once again wrapped in Hiroko’s embrace.

“I’m right here with you, you goof,” Hiroko promised. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Finally registering her surroundings, Kotono observed the even more intense plumes of smoke rising from where she had initially launched her attack. Now, a massive, gaping hole was in the ground where the wreckage had been resting. She could feel the heat even sitting from this distance.

Twinkles of red light drifted through the air all around.

“What…happened?” Kotono asked.

“Oh, you must have blacked out a little,” realized Hiroko. “You fired a ton of energy blasts just now. They were some of the biggest I’ve ever seen from you. I’d be shocked if that didn’t stop Wei. Now he’s buried under wreckage, and buried deeper underground.”

Kotono stared at the catastrophe bit dazed, her body relaxed from the fatigue of how tense she must have been.

“Did I...kill him?”

Energy swirled from within.

Hiroko pulled her even closer. “No. If he died, it’s his own doing. He brought this war on himself.”

The energy slowed, and didn’t manifest outside of her body. Kotono tried to sigh, but it came out shaky.

“Hey…” Hiroko started quietly. “Like I was saying before, how about you leave the rest of this to me?”

Kotono shook her head. “Hiroko, don’t…”

“Really, it’s fine! You can just sit back if you want. All that’s left now is to stay here and make sure Wei stays down—I can do that.”

She stood and took a few steps forward, hands on her hips.

“Even if he climbs his way out, he’ll probably be weakened. I can probably take him on alone,” Hiroko encouraged. “So it’s okay if you want to stop.”

“NO! You always do that, Hiroko!” Kotono protested. “That’s the same thing you said back then!”

Startled, Hiroko turned to reface her. “What do you mean?”

Finally, Kotono’s breath began stabilizing. “When I blacked out just now, I went back to that time I told you my secret. You said the same exact thing back then.”

Her strength returning, Kotono stood up. “You’re always looking out for me first before everything—even yourself. You always try to make sure I’m okay first…but sometimes that blinds you,” she said slowly. “Sometimes, you’re willing to make me feel better, even if it would make everything else worse.”

For the first time Kotono had ever seen, Hiroko was at a loss for words.

No—she was simply choosing to listen, instead.

“Hiroko…if I listened to you back then and quit the League, we wouldn’t have each other like we do now. That’s why I stuck with it. I had a feeling—I hoped it would bring us closer, make us inseparable. I knew you felt it, too,” Kotono shared. “And now, if I stop fighting with you, saving them will be so much harder. I believe we can do this. But you need me to help, just like you wanted me back then.”

She stepped closer, raising a fist to her chest.

“So I refuse to quit,” she promised. “I’m fighting with you—even if it terrifies me.”

Hiroko took her free hand and stood in silence. After a while, she nodded. “Alright,” she uttered. “Hey…you’re something else.”

Kotono let out a small laugh.

She could see it plainly in Hiroko’s eyes: the reluctance, the concern. Her attempts to mask it were futile after all these years together.

But she honored Kotono’s choice, nonetheless. And that filled Kotono’s heart.

She knew she could help make a difference today despite her crippling fears. As long as it was Hiroko she fought beside, she could do anything.

“You know, back then when you told me you had a secret,” Hiroko revealed, “I thought you were gonna say you were gay.”

Kotono giggled. “I guess that would’ve gone well, too.”

Suddenly, a new rumble in the ground interrupted their brief moment of peace. The duo darted their attention to the massive hole—this time, they’d felt it simultaneously.

“He’s…still active?” Hiroko exclaimed.

“I—I thought you said there was a chance he could make it out…?” recalled Kotono.

“Yeah, technically…but I didn’t really think so after those last few attacks you fired,” explained Hiroko. “How could anyone survive—”

The ground shook violently. Kotono almost stumbled off her feet until Hiroko caught her.

“What’s happening?!” Kotono cried.

“He’s powering his way out!”

“How?!”

Another quake intensified the earth’s roar. Particles of ground and stone began floating slowly out of the hole Kotono’s powers had created. At this rate, his escape felt practically inevitable.

Kotono couldn’t hear her accelerating breath over the sound. But she felt the rapid tightening in her chest.

Her red energy ignited once more, her eyes hot.

“I’m right here, Kotono, okay?” Hiroko reminded her as the gust tugged at her hair.

“Okay…”

Golden bursts of light flashed into the mix.

“Just aim and get ready to fire.”

Kotono raised her hands.

She didn’t need further elaboration: she knew Hiroko had already activated Predictor. If Wei emerged, Hiroko could foresee every motion he might take next.

“Remember, he’ll be pretty beaten up after all your attacks,” Hiroko pointed out. “Let’s use that to our advantage!”

That’s right…Kotono recalled.

They could do this.

All at once, a heap of heavy debris shot into the air in every direction. Kotono and Hiroko sidestepped a crashing chunk of bricks and came back together.

Remains of the ruined gate burst against the ground all around them. Even still, the rumbling didn’t cease.

Something in the air wasn’t right.

Then, they caught a glimpse of light blue hair lifting from the hole.

“Kotono, fire—” Hiroko began, but her words died immediately.

There was no question why. They both watched, unable to comprehend as Wei rose into the air smoothly and steadily. He floated above the hole, arms crossed and black eyes finding them calmly.

The hair on Kotono’s neck stood straight.

Not a single scratch—not even the slightest blemish—was on him.