Part 5 – That Familiar Darkness
Her eyes shot open, frantically looking around for the disturbance that caused her to rapidly sit up.
Readying her chains, she started sending out waves of her chakra to find the enemy.
A mere second later, she found the disturbance … her Mom had walked past her door.
Sighing deeply, she got up and looked for something comfortable to wear after her shower.
She knew, after waking up like this, that she wouldn’t be able to sleep again right now …
Usually she got around 4-5 hours of sleep every day. Last night she made the mistake of going to sleep a bit later, causing her to be still asleep when her Mom would prepare for work.
Instinctively, she could never fall asleep deeply enough to dream, even if she were completely exhausted. A small, out of place sound close to her would wake her up … especially footsteps. Those caused her finetuned fighting instincts to scream at her to get ready to fight. Had she not recognized her Mom’s chakra signature, she might have even shot out several chains to eliminate the threat.
She settled on black leggings and a brown pullover for today, seeing that it could be quite chilly lately, especially in the forest.
She set the clothes on her bed after carefully folding the blanket. Patting down her pillow a few times, she finally stepped out of the room, wearing only her underwear.
She had taken to sleeping in her underwear, as she loved the feeling of the soft blanket on her naked skin.
Noiselessly stepping towards the bathroom adjacent to her room, a bathroom that was only hers, she slipped inside and closed the door behind her.
Carefully making sure to follow her routine, she left the bathroom again, covering herself with a towel. She proceeded to dry her hair with chakra, making it silkily soft, just the way she liked it.
Her whole body smelled softly of vanilla, a scent she had lately taken a liking to since her Mom also used the same scent.
It was a scent that lightly lingered just when you walked past but did not have the overbearing nature of excessively used perfume. She liked a more natural smell.
Entering her bedroom, she dropped the towel, making sure she was dry, she slipped into her new underwear before pulling on her pants and sweater.
Already feeling the soft warmth of the fabric envelop her, she smiled slightly.
Wearing her short-heeled sandals and tying up her hair into a high ponytail, she left her room and walked towards the kitchen, where she could already smell a simple breakfast being prepared.
Her Mom knew that she did not need to eat, she had told her so, but she still prepared a portion of food for her every day … honestly, she liked that. It made her feel welcome and loved and warm all over.
Hugging her Mom from behind as she prepared the food, she took in the scent of her blonde hair.
“Morning Uzu … sorry for waking you up.” Tsunade said, sounding sorry.
Laughing softly, Uzu shook her head on Tsunade’s back, tickling her a bit.
Uzu continued hugging her Mom as she prepared the food and only let go once she was finished.
Sure, it did make cooking a bit harder, but both of them enjoyed the physical closeness they shared.
Tsunade had told her a bit about her life … telling her about Dan, the rest of her family that had all left her … her little brother Nawaki. Even now, it still caused the strong Hokage to cry silent tears when she thought back to all that she had already lost. Adding onto that, the recent death of her Sensei and also the role that her former teammate played in that.
Uzu didn’t know how to comfort her Mom other than hugging her and showing her that she was still there. She didn’t say anything … knowing that she could only make it worse and never better.
Tsunade had, however, responded positively to her hugs, so Uzu had decided to hug her as often as possible … always testing the waters before fully leaning into the hug though … she did not want to force her Mom into anything. No, she couldn’t do that, not with all the trust that had built between them.
They bonded over physical and emotional trust and spent a lot of time together, sometimes Uzu helped with the paperwork in the Office or in the hospital. Though she wasn’t allowed to work on the classified cases in either of them.
They ate in silence, just as Uzu liked it and she knew that her Mom would not force her to talk, so she was extremely grateful …
Washing the dishes, Uzu waited for her Mom to finish preparing for the hospital work, she would have a few very difficult and taxing operations today. Shizune couldn’t do them yet, so her Mom was forced to do them.
A few minutes later, they arrived in the hospital: “Uzu, can you help in the emergency ward? I know that you can do almost everything that I can do, so you’ll be fine~.”
Uzu nodded and Tsunade walked into the classified Anbu ward.
Across the day, she healed many different bone fractures, had a few smaller operations including weapons that stuck in dangerous places, pulling them out would have caused the patients to die of blood loss, so they were brought to the hospital with the weapon still stuck inside of them.
All in all, it was a very relaxed and normal day at the hospital.
Uzu looked for her Mom to tell her that she would leave around lunch time but couldn’t find her. She instead left a small note on the hospital head’s table and left.
Strolling through the streets of Konoha, she soon reached the familiar spot near the lake and spread out her white blanket again, preparing her Fuuinjutsu materials.
Just like yesterday, she felt a presence approach after she had finished quite a bit of her daily quota.
She looked at the blonde that plopped down next to her.
He lazily leaned onto one arm as he watched her with a small smile on his face.
Looking at his face for a bit, seeing the genuine smile on his face, she relaxed and started drawing again.
Finishing up a few more seals, she noticed that Naruto was slowly growing tired. She laid down her brush and looked at him.
She sent him a small smile as she held out her hand and when he finally interlocked his fingers with her own, her smile only grew.
She continued watching him for a while as he slept, and soon decided to just lie down for a bit too.
Closing her eyes and inhaling the scent of grass around her calmed her down.
Her thoughts slowed and slowed until she finally fell asleep.
It was only when her Anbu guard stepped onto the grass, that her eyes shot open and she realized that she had fallen asleep … earlier than midnight no less.
She felt incredibly rested as she lazily stretched, still holding onto Naruto’s warm and calloused hand.
Her eyes met his and the kindness and warmth of his smile and eyes made her feel happy … she was glad that being with her helped him … even if only a little bit.
He had clearly been up for a bit longer than she had, but his movements hadn’t caused her to wake up …
Slowly, they both stood up and let go of each other’s hand, if a bit reluctantly.
Naruto helped her gather her things and storing them in her scroll.
Slowly, even slower than yesterday, they walked back to the Hokage tower.
As they reached the entrance of the tower, Uzu moved inside only to turn around again to look at him.
Softly and quietly she muttered: “Coming again tomorrow?”
She felt a small warmth rush to her cheeks and ears.
“No …”, he said, making her smile vanish and her face grow cold, “but I’ll be there again the day after tomorrow.”
Uzu instantly felt a smile appear on her face again as she said: “I’ll be waiting.”
She waved at him, not quite sure what she was doing right now …
Quickly, not waiting to see his reaction, she turned around and walked into the dark tower.
A few meters in, she felt herself calm down again … just like she always did when her emotions spiked into a direction that wasn’t wanted.
Wanting to feel the warmth again, she stopped in her tracks and looked back one last time. Seeing him still standing there, smiling, she felt warmth spread in her body, a smile appearing on her face again.
Reassured, she walked towards her room and prepared for another few hours of Fuuinjutsu practice. She would take it slow today though, creating a few basic seals.
…
[Naruto POV]
I wonder … will she really be there again, Naruto thought, enjoying the sound of his footsteps on the grass.
He had always thought the forests of Konoha to be calming … because he could hide here. They weren’t here, most of the time.
His walking slowed and slowed, dreading the moment when he would inevitably arrive at the lake. A few years ago, he wouldn’t even have managed to get close to any body of water …
Closing his eyes, he passed the last bush and stopped in his tracks, listening to the sounds of nature surrounding him.
Together with the sound of water, there was a slight chirping of birds and the sound of a brush drawing on paper.
She is here! She is actually here! Just like she promised …
His eyes shot open and he almost desperately searched for the gentle and calm figure of the girl.
When he had first seen her, he had already been stunned by her red hair … he loved it. Her bright blue eyes pierced his soul, as if she knew everything about him … which she shouldn’t. There was too much that she doesn’t need to know about him.
He was certain that she knew that he carried the Nine-Tails. How could she not, being Tsunade’s daughter?
He walked towards her and searched for his spot on the blanket. The same spot where he had lied yesterday. Carefully plopping down on the soft blanket, he made sure not to be too close to her. He knew that she didn’t like to be too close to strangers.
Is she annoyed … that I’ve come again?
He slowly put up an arm below his head, leaning onto his side to get a better view of her as she worked. Seeing her beautiful and serious face made him smile.
Just being near her calmed him down and made him feel … safe, in a way that he hadn’t felt for a long, long time. If not for the first time ever.
Ever since they had attacked him inside of his own home … he had not even felt the illusion of safety anymore.
He shook his head, not wanting to think of such things when being with her. He had seen that she always carefully observed his facial expression, especially his smile.
When he … faked it, her smile was small, almost unnoticeable. But … when he was truly feeling happy and an uncontrollable smile spread on his face, he could practically feel her entire demeanor change. She reflected his happiness on her face, and it made her look ever more beautiful and cuter than normal.
Especially her pink lips always drew his gaze to them. The way her eyes slightly closed to form crescents when she truly smiled was …
She seemed to finish her seal and turned to look at him, snapping him out of his daydream.
At first, her face remained emotionless as she studied his expression. When she deemed it as genuine, or so he guessed, he saw her lips curl up into a sweet smile that he had never seen before. His heart skipped a beat and he could feel a warmth spread across his body.
He had never seen her give this kind of smile to anyone before …
And … even if he felt a bit guilty and ashamed … he wanted her to only show her smile to him and only him. Though he knew …
She returned to her craft and he enjoyed watching her meticulously create intricate designs on the paper. The movement of her hands and the way that the brush flew across the paper seemingly all natural and practiced. There was not even an ounce of hesitation in her movements.
As he continued watching her create more seals, he felt his usually racing thoughts slow down.
His eyelids drooped and he felt much-needed sleep and rest embrace him.
When she turned to him and held out her hand, he was surprised, hesitating for a bit, wondering if he would be overstepping her limits.
After a bit of contemplation, his hand unconsciously reached out to weave into hers.
The soft feeling of her skin against his own hand gave him the last push.
And as the wind blew the soft scent of vanilla into his nose, he felt the grasp of sleep drag him into comfortable darkness … completely unlike that …
…
Feeling a soft breeze on his face, he slowly opened his eyes.
Am I dreaming?
He couldn’t believe his eyes as he looked at the sleeping girl lying close to him.
His eyes focused on her peaceful expression and her lips that curled into a soft smile as if she was having a very pleasant dream.
He slowly sat up, making sure not to make any sudden moves or sounds … hoping that she could sleep a bit longer.
This isn’t a dream …
Hesitating a little bit, he moved his free hand over to her head and gently touched her hair, feeling its soft texture against his skin.
Just as he brought the strand of red hair to his nose to take in its scent, he suddenly realized what he was actually doing right now and let the strand of hair drop to the ground.
When it unluckily fell onto her nose, she stirred a little, blowing it away before snuggling closer towards him, the source of warmth around her.
He continued watching her until he felt her stir at the sound of a footstep coming from her Anbu guard. He felt tempted to glare at him for waking her … but he knew that their time would come to an end … and he couldn’t meet her anymore, if she even wanted to see him again.
A part of him still couldn’t believe that she even came again today … usually people that he cared for left him behind … just like many of his comrades in the orphanage did … when they chose to …
When he first saw Uzu, he had unmistakably recognized the faint glimmer in her eyes as she had emotionlessly followed behind his Jonin-sensei, walking towards the Hokage’s office. It scared him. It truly scared him. He knew that she would leave too, if it even got too hard to bear.
He didn’t dare to let him care about her at first … but the more he saw her … her red hair and the rare smiles that she showed from time to time … how could he not care about her? After seeing her in those black shorts, he had been totally smitten by her appearance too, even if he had at first only liked her smile.
The most embarrassing thing about all that, was that the Ero-Sennin had even asked him about that gaze he had sent her when she turned her back to him in the Hokage’s office. At that time, he couldn’t help but blush.
Looking at each other for a bit, they both stood up and gathered her things.
As they walked towards the village, he couldn’t help but wish for their time together to never end … he hadn’t felt this comfortable in a long while.
He just knew, when he went home alone again today, into that cold … and dark place, they would haunt him again. All those that left him, all those that hate him, blame him.
But his time with her needed to be enough … he couldn’t impose on her any longer than he already had …
Unconsciously, both of them slowed down and their moods dimmed when they reached the Hokage’s tower.
He watched as she moved towards the entrance and turned around, giving him a sweet smile.
He watched her face slightly redden as she whispered: “Coming again tomorrow?”
He froze … before finally speaking: “No …”
Her smile faded, but he would only lose her again like everyone that he cared about some way or another.
She forced him to understand that, clearly.
However, he still desired … to see her smile again … so choosing to make the same mistake, he desperately said: "… but I'll be there again the day after tomorrow."
It took him a lot of courage to say that … but seeing her face light up again was worth every bit of it. If he was really going to be close to her … then he needed to make sure that she was safe.
“I’ll be waiting.” She said, moving her hand up and waving at him awkwardly.
He couldn’t help but smile at her cute behavior.
He watched patiently as she turned around and walked away, her swaying hips and her slender legs once again drawing his sight to them.
He was slightly shocked when he saw her turn around again, only to give him another one of her sweet smiles.
He waited until she vanished around the corner and even then, he stood there for a bit longer, wondering whether she would come back.
When she didn’t, he finally moved towards his own apartment, where his dearest friends and comrades would wait for him in his dreams.
On the one hand, he appreciated the fact that he would never, ever forget their faces, their voices and the strength they gave him … but at the same time, they reminded him of what would happen if he ever treasured someone.
Instead of him, the one’s he treasured most would suffer the beating he would have gotten. This taught him that once he treasured something, anything really, then it would suffer, no matter how good he did or how hard he worked.
And at some point, people just broke, they lost hope and they broke. When they couldn’t take it anymore, then they left, they left. Taken away by that oh so familiar darkness …
Now, their figures, as they hung, or bled, or jumped and fell were burned into his mind. He would never, ever forget their faces, names and voices. They would be a permanent reminder of what happened when he ever treasured something too much.
Every day, he felt himself grow closer to Uzu … and … he couldn’t distance himself. He just couldn’t. He wanted to see her, every day, at all times of the day.
But he just knew … it couldn’t end well. No matter how hard he tried. But he couldn’t resist, not this time.
…
A/N: Let me know what you think! :3