Purrologe
Okay, it was a terrible day. I hadn't gotten enough sleep because I tried to prepare for the exams. Did it matter, though? I really doubted it.
The content of the test was complete bullshit, I thought as I relaxed in my bed at the dorm. Did someone from our class piss off this self-important professor?
As if this wasn't enough, I found out that my crush started to date that asshole from the frat who was well known for being a womanizer. It's not like I blamed him, though. I'd probably did the same if I had his looks. Being a nerdy dude with a below-average appearance really sucked.
I was already a nineteen-year-old, but people still sometimes confused me with a high-schooler. It didn't help that my stature was rather feminine. There was one time a guy had mistaken me for a girl from behind... Since then, I had kept my hairstyle short.
Yeah, it's decided then, I resolved, I'm going to buy a gym membership and put some muscle!
I stood up from the bed and opened my laptop to search for the closest gym. A picture of a charming anime catgirl in a cute pose greeted me at my Desktop.
When I have a girlfriend, I'll make her wear cat ears and say 'nyan' for me!
With such bright thoughts, I started to browse the web.
Oh, is this a catgirl cosplay? This girl really has some talents! Two big meaty talents!
It didn't take me long to forget why I turned on my laptop in the first place...
Oh, is this a trailer of a new TV show about a powerful mage? Let's check this out...
And so I spent my time meaninglessly, completely oblivious that it was my last day on Earth.
Before I noticed, I fell asleep, my face using the laptop as a pillow.
***
Huh, where am I?! I pondered as I looked around.
The last thing I remembered I was in my room browsing the internet. And now I found myself floating in the boundless outer space?!
What the actual Meow?! For some reason, I made silly cat jokes even in such an absurd situation. It came to me naturally, as if it was my second nature. This was my talent, my supurr pawer.
I wanted to check the condition of my body, but there was nothing to check.
I didn't need eyes to see or ears to hear, it felt like I became the purrest form of existence, heh. Countless stars and galaxies surrounded me in the boundless cosmos, my home planet nowhere to be seen.
"Hello, Alex Jobs," a feminine voice resounded through the empty space even if it was theoretically impossible. Then again, it was nothing to be surprised about, considering my current state.
Suddenly, an incomprehensible being appeared before me... A cat. A giant fucking Siamese cat the size of a whole planet.
"Hello, kitty," I replied mentally, but my voice took physical form without my intention. "Sorry, but I don't have any cat food at me. And to feed you, I'd need more Whiskas than Earth had ever produced."
"You can call me Nyanrlatho'lanac," the cat said, ignoring the poor joke attempt. "Unfortunately, my full name should be too complex for your comprehension."
As the cat talked, the nearest stars started to shake, and one of them even exploded.
"If this name is just a short version, then I really don't want to hear the full one," I said. "Can I call you Nyanac?"
The being nodded her head in confirmation. I assumed that she was just too of herself to care about minor details. She definitely had the right to be arrogant, though.
"You are the most badass cat I have ever seen in my life, that's for sure," I praised sincerely. "By the way, can you turn into a catgirl?"
Ignoring my nonsense yet again, Nyanac spoke majestically like a goddess overlooking the world, "We don't have much time for pleasantries, my dear human. Your soul isn't going to last for much longer... Let me get straight to the deal. Do you want to be given a new body and to continue your life in a new world, or do you want to return to Samsara and lose all of your memories?"
I replied with unhidden confusion, "I don't get what's going on, honestly... Do you imply that I already died?"
The enormous kitty just nodded in confirmation, her sky-blue eyes hurrying me up. I wondered how she could see the invisible me in the first place...
"Can you give me some details about the first option?" I asked in a hurry. If she told the truth, then I could disappear any time soon...
"I'll turn you into what you longed the most," Nyanac said. "You'll take your most desired form, receive incredible powers. In exchange, I want you to stop your new home from being destroyed by a terrible catastrophe."
So a cat wants me to prevent a CATastrophe, got it! I mused in my mind.
"So you are going to make me a wizard?!" I instantly guessed.
Throughout my whole life, I had this longing to become a mage, just like in fantasy stories and anime. Of course, I had never expected to become one for real.
"Yes, you'll have a great gift for magic," the cat replied.
"Are there any hidden conditions?" I still asked, my choice all but made. "You won't own my soul after the end of the contract or something like this, right?"
With an adorable smile, the cat declared, "I swear on my name as a True Deity that there's no trick or deceit in my offer, I'm going to give you another chance in a different world, and you only need to stop the calamity, after that you are free to do as you wish."
At those words, stars and galaxies all around us shook, and I knew with all my being that her words were the ultimate truth. It wasn't something that could be explained with logic. It was as if the world itself became the witness to our deal.
A holographic notification appeared before me.
Accept
Decline
I chose the first option without hesitation. Losing the memories of my past life wasn't that different from dying, so even if Nyanac hid some nasty details, it wouldn't make me change my decision.
My only mistake was not asking her for more details about my new body. Maybe if I did, I'd manage to convince her to at least leave me my dong...