Casual Heroing

Few things can help a person like hot cocoa. Milk in this world is fresher and tastier than you can even imagine. Why? Magic, obviously. I mean, magic cows.

While I mix some chocolate with fresh milk, I also prepare a special cream – a bit sour and a bit denser than the hot cocoa. While whipping it and letting it cool, I hear footsteps coming across the kitchen. The chances of getting stabbed to death are actually quite high, aren’t they? This poor girl just got ‘schooled’ by Stan in a brutal manner.

Is the old man wrong? I usually don’t bother with these questions, but it seems apt to find an answer right now. If not just because, at least because it would make me feel less guilty.

To be honest, if the Queen of an entire kingdom is speciesist, I don’t think it should be that big of a problem. Rulers are never perfect, and we shouldn’t ask them to be, should we? This is not a period of sensitivity and political correctness, as I understand it. Many Elves hate Humans, and they hate them for a very good reason, don’t they? See, even though I tried to keep myself ignorant, my chats with Flaminia and Camilla gave me more insights than you would imagine.

It took a bit to resurface, but I am pretty sure I know the general story Stan was mentioning. Sure, he lived it in first-person, from what I gather. A Prince of Elves was betrayed by a Human Princess; nonetheless, he’d made a great speech on his deathbed, advocating for the end of the war with the Human kingdoms. He said that warring would only drive the Elven Empire into the ground.

So, when a Queen is speciesist, it’s not a problem of being kind or not. It’s a problem with their own culture. See, it’s like being American and hating capitalism; it is true that big corporations – big Pharma, for one – have broken many rules and have abused the system. However, what made America great was great speculation and economic growth. Innovation. Freedom.

Advocating for a Swedish socialist model may not be wrong, sure. However, there’s something truly ‘not American’ in wanting to pursue such a thing. It’s like asking an Italian to skip their lunch break to work.

Mores, as the Ancient Romans called them. The ‘costumes’ that a society weaves with its cloth. They are woven with delicate fabric over the years, and they seep deeply into a collective mindset.

This is an angle that many people never consider.

Tradition.

Tradition is not just being ‘conservative.’ It’s also keeping some of the costumes undefiled. It’s not as simple as ‘Democrats’ and ‘Republicans,’ see. It’s deeper; it’s about what people feel and how they think they should behave.

It would be a titanic feat to make the US like Sweden or vice versa. Whether one of the two is good or bad – is another discussion altogether.

Take the Spartans and the Ancient Romans – some Romantic historians believed that their fall coincided with the loss of the most important costumes of their society. There’s this emblematic quote about Spartans falling from grace when their cooks could not cook their famous black broth anymore. It’s obviously mostly fiction for the romantics, don’t misunderstand me. It’s the same with the Ancient Romans, even though that’s a much bigger can of worms.

However, when a society loses many of its mores, it’s never good.

And I interpret what Stan just did based on that. He’s trying to protect Elven costumes that he believes are essential for his kind to prosper. Considering that he’s not advocating for a massive wall but is instead preaching kindness toward Humans – and considering the fact that I am, indeed, a Human – I’m oriented to side with my Stanimal. It’s harsh, yes.

I place a round layer of white chocolate on top of the hot cocoa, a divider of sorts, and pour my cold cream – which is actually something between cream and custard – on top of it. It’s my personal version of the Italian variant of the Chantilly Crème. Completely different from the French original.

I sprinkle some broken cookies and a couple of chips of very dark chocolate on top, careful not to overwhelm the chalice that I’m using. I find excessive cream on top of things very crass. I like my desserts the way I like my women, elegant and refined.

I look behind me, and I find Princess Laura sitting on a stool, staring into the void. Her eyes are red, and her magnificent hair is a little less perfect than before – she must have ruffled it in desperation.

I go up to her, but I don’t put the mug on the table right away.

“This stupid thing has rare ingredients; can you promise to taste it and not throw it on the ground?” I look at her very seriously.

Why am I doing this?

This is not the first time something like this has happened to me. And it would not be the first time someone smashed the stuff I made on the ground out of frustration. Since I don’t like wasting food, I ask. Once a person gives their word, especially when they are this proud, it’s very unlikely that they will waste my creations.

She keeps staring, and I simply stand still. We stay like that for a couple of minutes before her gaze is brought to me.

If I didn’t have the chalices enchanted, the hot cocoa would start getting cold by now. However, since we are making a boatload of money, I splurged on little details. Stan didn’t want to, but he’s not the owner, now, is he?

Hehe.

Princess Laura looks at the hot cocoa in my hand and nods.

I put it on the table and fish out a small spoon from a cupboard.

She’s a prisoner; I realize while I see her lifelessly staring at the spoon she just picked up. That’s why she’s not acting out. It is surprising that her reaction was so tame, but it’s also true that she just experienced the biggest shock of her entire life, didn’t she?

“You can spoon the top and eat it separately or break the white divider and mix the cream into the hot cocoa. The cream is a little sour, so if you eat that first, the hot cocoa will taste sweeter. Otherwise, if you mix it, it will have a particular taste, almost like cake. The cream – or, more precisely, crème – is denser than it looks. Plus, we added a special reagent to make it denser when it touches a hot liquid. It’s one of the very first original recipes I came up with after coming to Amorium.”

It’s also a personality test. And it’s wildly popular among our female clientele.

Hehe.

Anyway, ladies—no, I meant, personality test. Yeah, I like to think that some people can bear through the sour part of life before getting to their sweet reward, which will taste even sweeter. Some, instead, are impatient, and they want everything at once; those break the white chocolate immediately.

Princess Laura ponders my arcane test before scooping up the sour Crème and raising her eyebrows in surprise. She eats the whole thing before breaking the white chocolate into the hot cocoa. Then, she starts sipping it, mostly ignoring me.

God, she’s so damn beautiful.

But would she pass the Zombie Apocalypse test?