Casual Heroing

So, Princess Laura is looking at me.

Do I need to explain what kind of murderous aura she has about her?

“Listen to me, worm,” she says, hissing the last word.

Worm?

From behind me, I hear Gaius gasping.

Huh?

“Is ‘worm’ some kind of a speciesist slur?” I ask, confused.

“We call little bastard Humans ‘worms’ because you are just little worms parasitizing our continent even after we exterminated your filthy kind, who tried to eradicate us out of jealousy.”

“Hm, right,” I nod while smiling and looking at her otherworldly face.

“So, we came here on a precise mission, worm, and you better answer my questions if you don’t want to die a rat’s death. Then, once we are done, you can return to your worm mother who spawned such an insignificant bastard like yourself.”

Oh, man.

I sigh.

“Gaius, fireworks,” I say our codeword.

“Joey! Wait!” the man is alarmed.

At least I warned him.

[Greater Chain Flash]

An explosion of innocuous blinding lights erupts in the middle of the Royal Guard. I put one of those [Flashes] between Laura and me, and I hear a scream of pain.

See, many people have enchantments to protect themselves from harmful magic. Now, what’s really interesting is that no one ever thought of a [Light Mage] as anything particularly dangerous. Therefore, most protective enchantments and wards cannot eat an overcharged [Flash] spell in your face.

I point a finger at the woman’s chest while the entire Royal Guard is trying to understand what they are looking at. Sadly, this spell has no end until I say so. Blinding lights are flashing back and forth, basically covering the whole bakery. See, after my mugging, I have started thinking of something that would guarantee me some leeway during a fight. And a simple [Flash] spell is the best solution I could think of. I even made it so that it alters the heat of any fire, making it impossible to scan for my position. Plus, the magical residue also makes it impossible to track me in this mess.

And how can I fight, then?

[Eyes: Light Immunity]

“I’m sorry, Princess, but no one insults my mom,” I say while pointing a finger at her chest.

[Advanced Light Lance]

The skill has changed since the first time in the Dungeon. I added a rotation to it and made it much stronger than before, endlessly refining its matrix into something much simpler and more elegant.

And much more deadly.

The Princess of the Elven Kingdom is taken off her feet. I can see her armor neutralized most of the impact, though. She just took a deadly spell to her chest with minimal damage.

That’s the spirit of a Vanedeni!

“Juler, how do I avoid getting killed?” I ask in a whisper.

Just look.

Suddenly, all my [Flashes] go out, and the bakery door opens.

“Kill that damn worm!” I hear the girl on the ground screaming. Her eyes are probably useless before she can reach a healer. From where I’m standing, I probably burned a lot of her nerve endings. The [Flash] in her face was the real blow, whereas the lance to her chest was more for pure scorn.

I know, I know.

Hitting a girl and whatnot.

But I’m telling you, there’s one unbreakable rule in my code.

No. One. Insults. My. Mother.

A terrifying aura instantly spreads around the bakery, and I smile at its owner.

“Retinete,” Stan barks an order with the full weight of his aura in it.

Stan takes a few steps forward while the whole Royal Guard is frozen after his one word. He looks at the Princess on the ground and then stares at me, shaking his head, disappointed.

“She called my mother a ‘worm,’ Stanimal,” I say with a defensive tone.

“Conflict breeds conflict. Hate begets hate,” he says with tiredness in his voice that I’ve never heard before.

He crouches down and puts a hand on the Princess’s eyes.

“Who are you?! Stop! Why can’t I move?!”

“Stay put, child. The damage done to your eyes cannot be healed easily by anyone else. And if you use a potion, you will just become blind; in fact, it would scar the inside of your eyes.”

After hearing those words, the woman goes still.

After a couple of awkward minutes of everyone just staring at Stan using some very complex magic, my manager finally stands up and approaches me.

“Go help her get up,” he says sternly.

“What?”

“Go help her get up and apologize to each other,” he thunders. But it’s the kind of tone you don’t say no to.

Under the murderous gazes of the other black armors, I walk up to the Princess, and I find her blinking and rubbing her eyes.

I awkwardly offer my hand to the crazy woman on the ground, cringing at what I’m being forced to do. I feel like a seven-year-old fighting with their little sister.

As soon as she clears her vision, her face twists in anger.

“You!” she screams.

“Silence!”

I swear to God, I almost shat myself.

Stan’s shout makes the girl shut up.

“I’ll be treating both of you like the kids you are, and I’ll hang you upside down from a tree if you don’t apologize to each other immediately!”

Is that an Elven thing?

Whatever.

Man, Stanimal is really scary when he gets angry.

The girl grits her teeth, but she suddenly grabs my hand and gets up as fast as possible, clearly disgusted by having to touch me and wanting to end that experience as soon as possible.

“Done! I came here to find my ancestor! If you are him, I’ll have my father know that I had to—”

Stan raises a leg slightly and stomps.

The entire bakery trembles.

“I shall hang that idiot of a father who raised you like this upside down too! Fools!”

I see Grigio with raised hackles, bigger than ever, reaching almost to Stan’s midriff. Even so, it looks like the dog is holding back.

Wait a second.

If this girl is the Princess… has Stan just threatened to hang the King upside down from a tree?

Oh, man.

Stanimal is not just a [Druid], is he?