Between Your Letter and My Reply

Chapter 86

[Translated By Divinity]

“So how can you be sure? You have no memories, how do you know you liked someone?”

“Because I did things that someone who likes another person would do!”

“What kind of things?”

“There are… those kinds of things.”

Lilliana turned her head away haughtily, and Damian sighed deeply.

“If you don’t tell me, I won’t know what you mean. And is it really that important that you liked someone? Whoever that person is, they didn’t even contact you when you were hospitalized after the accident. So there are two possibilities. Either they weren’t close enough to be informed about your accident, or they were informed but not close enough to visit you. Either way, it means they weren’t that close to you. So they weren’t that important of a person.”

His tone grew increasingly accusatory as he listed his points. And his last statement was the final straw for Lilliana’s patience.

“Even if we’re being generous, it was just unrequited love on your part. Do you really need to find them?”

“What’s wrong with unrequited love?!”

Lilliana glared at Damian, her face contorted in anger, an expression he had never seen before.

“You’re incredibly insensitive and rude! Whether it was unrequited or mutual, that person could have been important to me! How can you say such a thing?!”

“Just because someone was important in the past doesn’t mean they’re still important now.”

“How can you be so sure that person isn’t important to me now?”

“Because they’re not by your side right now!”

“Even if they’re not by my side, I don’t want to forget someone who was important to me!”

Sensing the atmosphere turning hostile, Damian closed his mouth. But he didn’t like what Lilliana was saying and frowned, averting his gaze.

“Anyway, I will regain my memories.”

Lilliana said resolutely in an angered tone.

“Even if I have to beg Soliel, I’ll get them back.”

Then she strode ahead of Damian.

Damian sighed deeply and followed behind her. The more they talked, the more they seemed to be provoking each other. Lilliana was one thing, but Damian couldn’t understand why he was getting angry.

It wasn’t him who was struggling to regain his memories, it was Lilliana. Since she was the one insisting on retrieving them, all he had to do was offer words of encouragement and let her do as she pleased.

Even if he didn’t understand why Lilliana wanted to regain her memories, it was her business. But Damian was angry.

‘Why?’

He asked himself, but there was no answer. He didn’t know why he was so irritated.

The reason Damian couldn’t understand Lilliana’s fixation on her “precious connection” from the past was understandable. It wasn’t just because he didn’t have many precious connections himself, but also because the ones he did have disappeared from his life too quickly.

As a result, those connections never became truly important to him.

At the orphanage, he was envied and resented because he was sponsored by Marquis Jeska.

When he entered the academy, he was an outcast among the children from wealthy families.

In the military, anyone he got close to would die.

So Damian had never experienced anything like a precious bond or relationship.

To him, connections between people weren’t that important. All that mattered was distinguishing between personal and professional relationships. Professional relationships were important, but personal ones were optional.

That’s why he couldn’t understand why people valued individual connections so much.

The only exception for Damian was Lady Lintray…

But even then, he valued their connection because their conversations had changed his life. If it weren’t for that, he wouldn’t have bothered trying to find her.

But the person Lilliana was trying to find wasn’t even in her memories, and their relationship was purely based on speculation. Why was such a person so precious? Damian truly couldn’t understand Lilliana.

But not understanding was one thing, why was he angry?

If Damian had calmed down and thought about it, he would have realized he had no reason to be angry and that apologizing was the right thing to do.

But he was currently sulking and couldn’t think rationally.

So he deliberately didn’t try to catch up with Lilliana and just trailed behind her, keeping his mouth shut.

As Lilliana had said to Damian before going home, she opened the door to “Rabbit’s Garden.” Seeing Damian follow her in, she narrowed her eyes and snapped,

“Why do you keep following me?!”

At this point, Damian felt a little wronged.

“Because it’s my job!”

He was only following Lilliana because it was his duty to protect her, why did he have to listen to such remarks?

Lilliana, as if realizing this, avoided Damian’s gaze and went to the counter to order a cream cheese cake topped with peach preserves.

When Lilliana settled into a seat, Damian sat separately at a table behind her.

The cafe owner, now quite familiar with Damian and Lilliana, served Lilliana her cake and black tea and Damian his coffee, then struck up a conversation.

“Why are you two sitting like this today? Did you have a fight?”

“Yes.”

“Yes.”

Damian and Lilliana answered almost simultaneously. They glanced at each other, then quickly turned their heads away.

“Why did you fight?”

“There was a reason.”

“Damian was rude.”

Seeing Damian’s evasive answer, Lilliana tattled. The owner’s eyes narrowed, and he poked Damian in the side.

“Apologize quickly.”

“…”

“The longer you drag this out, the harder it gets to apologize. It’s wise to apologize quickly and be done with it.”

He wasn’t wrong, but why did Damian feel so resistant?

He tried to ignore it, but unable to withstand the owner’s persistent gaze, Damian said in an indifferent tone,

“I apologize.”

Somehow, it didn’t seem very sincere, so Lilliana didn’t want to accept the apology. However, with the owner staring intently, she finally opened her mouth.

“Fine, I got it.”

The cafe owner nodded in satisfaction and went back to work, but Damian and Lilliana’s seating arrangement remained unchanged.

Damian spoke from behind Lilliana.

“I was being rude.”

He still didn’t understand Lilliana.

“It was my fault, so please don’t be mad.”

Despite his words, he wasn’t over his anger either.

Damian’s head ached, unsure how to deal with this unfamiliar emotion.

“Damian…”

Lilliana, who had been sulking and looking away from Damian, finally spoke.

“If you had amnesia and forgot about me, wouldn’t you try to regain your memories?”

“…I don’t know.”

Lilliana grumbled at his blunt answer.

“Shouldn’t you just say you’d try to remember, to be tactful?”

“But I really don’t know. Lilliana…”

Damian lowered his gaze and was silent for a moment before speaking again.

“If you forgot about me, would you still try to regain your memories?”

“Of course.”

Lilliana’s immediate response was as expected. But Damian continued in a calm voice,

“Why?”

“Why? Well, that’s because…”

“We’ve only known each other for two months. We haven’t shared many significant experiences during that time. We haven’t greatly influenced each other’s lives, and even if we were to part ways, it wouldn’t drastically change our lives. If I weren’t here, you could just find a new bodyguard, and I could find a new job. Well, I might have some trouble finding employment, but it wouldn’t be impossible to live without you.”

Damian looked down at his prosthetic hand and asked,

“Despite all that, would you still go out of your way to regain your memories?”

***

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